"Day After" -- Improv

You see, I finally have time at the piano and as it turns out, I have things to say. It seems also, that posting my improvs here is some form of "writing" them down for me, at least at the time. So, here we are.

This improv is actually based on something quite specific and was an accompaniment to the intense visions in my mind. This is a vision I have had on several (many) occasions, or perhaps it's something that never quite goes away. However, I finally put it into some kind of music. The vision itself could be represented many different ways, I suppose. Sometime I guess I will acutally compose a symphony or something "about" it. Right now, though, I have a difficult time wanting to actually commit things to paper ... it almost doesn't make sense to me to do so.

Also, I am at a point where, today anyway, I have glimpses of a different aim in my music. Perhaps I would like to let go of a concept that I must have the music be a certain way in order to have it be "music." Perhaps I would like to just say what I have to say and stop trying to fit it into the mental-confines of what seems acceptable in the world to me. I find I am often wanting to push that envelope anyway.

Maybe I ought to make a painting ?

I almost always feel like I cannot quite reflect what is inside of me. Like I wish my hands went somewhere different at a certian point than what they actually did. I find that frustrating because I can hear something in my mind that does not actually *always* come out (though, okay, many times it does).

It is my impression that "the really good improvisers" do not have this problem. That they can get out exactly what is in them and exactly when they want. Part of me also suspects that this idea though, is just another little elusive shadow or so, which will ultimately lead one to "greater" heights and in all the while, make one think they are always chasing something just out of reach. I think as a result, what you hear is a bit of a sketch. As I listen to it, I can hear where I would like to elaborate and change things a bit, I suppose that is how an actual composition is formed, at least one way it is formed.

Along these lines, though, I feel like I am wanting more imagination and more ideas. That is one reason I enjoy listening to other people's improvisations. When listening to other people's improvs, I find myself thinking at times, "wow, I never thought of it like this" ... that's a nice time listening, as far as I am concerned

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Thanks for listening.