For Barabara, by me

[greyrune]

This is a piece written for my mum's birthday.  I'd love any feedback you guys have.

[rachfan]

Hi greyrune,

I don't take in many of the improvisions here, but something drew me to yours.  I'm glad I listened, as I believe you have a nice composition there.  It is modern idiom, yet has an unmistakeable neo-romantic tinge to it around the edges.  I think this is so well developed that if you haven't written it out, or don't want to take the time, at least do an electronic "realization" of the piece.  If I had to make one criticism, it would be this: most of the composition is in the tenor and treble (and occasionally in the high bass in the accompaniment).  The mood seems to be one of restlessness.  If you could find a way to bring about a single pause and insert there a quiet harmonic "purple patch" in the low bass that would fit the character of the piece, it would add a lot by bringing a slight and welcome respite from the intense restlessness of the stream of dissonances, particularly the recurring close second intervals.  Just my opinion.   Again, I like it!

[pianistimo]

if i was your mom, i'd feel soooo happy.  what a lovely present.  the best kind are the presents of the heart.  and, you are honest with your feelings - which makes the 'understanding' much better between a mom and son.  have to admit when i first started telling my mom exactly what i thought - there was some tension between us.  then, gradually she started accepting what i was saying and we started getting along better than before.  i consider some of the dissonances good because - after all - we are all separate different people.  what we like our mom's might not necessarily like - but it is part of us.  so, just start working with the dissonances (as you do).  pretty soon it's like the ending of this piece.  a lovely working of the dissonances together to make it seem as thoug they are working in tandem - for each other- and respecting each other by giving enough distance - and yet wanting to be together.

[greyrune]

thanks for the replies. I have written the piece out, I couldn't improvise like that, it's fully composed.  The piece does, I admit, spend a great deal of time in the central and higher areas of the keyboard.  I like the idea of putting a section down lower, though I'm not entirely sure what you mean by a "purple" section.  A lower register, less dissonant feel would certainly work well though, as it tends to get muddy otherwise.  This piece is finnished for now but I'll bear that in mind for the future as I do have a tendency to favour the higher register, it'd be good to work lower.

pianistimo, I like your reading of the piece.  I wasn't intended to really convey a story in that way, but it certainly does suit the music and the situation.  I've always got on with my mum, but there are always periods of discord and a growing apart as I grew up a bit.  I like your reading of the end in particular, very poetic.  It's great to see what people get out of different pieces that the composer probably very rarely intended to put in.

Anyway thanks, I appreciate the feedback.

[rachfan]

Hi greyrune,

It's hard to define a purple patch exactly.  It usually occurs briefly or for even a fleeting moment in a composition.  It's like a new turn of phrase or a sudden lush sound.  For a second, it's like peering into a new dimension.  It is too small in its own right to change a composition, but it adds something worthy to it. 

I tried to think up an example, and thought of "Daisies" by Rachmaninoff.  Rachmaninoff, when he was quite young, wrote many songs for voice, "Daisies" being one of them.  His songs are absolute gems.  There're not as widely known in the west as they should be, as few singers in Europe and the U.S. are proficient in singing in Russian.  In his Songs, "Daisies" is Op. 38, No. 3, the piano version having the same designation, as it is a transcription. 

The piece is in the key of F.  I've attached my recording of it here.  Notice that it is written in a fairly narrow range on the keyboard, similar to what you have done in that respect.  There are a couple of reasons.  First, there is the character of the piece itself.  Daisies are fragile flowers, so the piece cannot sound heavy like an energetic Brahms Capriccio.  Secondly, the material comes mainly from the piano accompaniment in the song (with the melodic line incorporated into the solo piano transcription, of course).  An accompaniment can never overwhelm the singer, so he wanted to retain that concept in the solo piano version as well. 

But as the piece progresses, in the LH there is suddenly a refreshingly very low but quiet D flat.  Surprisingly, it's not a note at all, but merely a grace note!  But it has to be caught in the pedal, as this grace note actually doubles as a pedal point, or a sustained moment of sound underlying the figuration in the treble.  The result is an unexpected, lush wash of sound that immediately draws the listener's interest and provides a fleeting but pleasurable aural sensation.  Have a listen, and I think you'll get the idea of what I mean.  I hope you enjoy my recording.

[greyrune]

cool, yeah I think i get what you mean, just a little unexpected harmonic turn.  I'll remember that.  Nice playing on the daisies as well.