I have now officially heard it all!

[celticqt]

Yesterday one of my students explained to me that she couldn't really play her music very well because she had lost her books last week.  Okay......heard that one numerous times.  THEN she said, "And I was mouthing off to my dad yesterday, and he kept adding 5 minutes to my practice time as punishment, so I had to practice for 50 minutes last night."

AACK!  The last thing this already-under-motivated student needs is practice time being used as a punishment! What are these parents thinking??

Okay, I feel better now *sigh*.  What's the best line you've heard as a teacher? 

[sulphent]

That's terrible lol. It sounds to me that she obviously doesn't want to learn the instrument. She probably moans about practising to her Father, therefore her Father has picked up on this and uses it to pay her back. Have you asked her if she really wants to learn the instrument?

[celticqt]

Yes, I have asked her that, sulphent.  She does not want to take lessons.  However, her father wants all of his kids to study piano until they're sixteen, after which they can decide if they want to continue.   

Last year she had a much better attitude - she practiced faithfully and seemed to want to improve.  Maybe it's a stage; she is in sixth grade now and all she talks about is makeup and Ashton Kitchener, or whatever-his-face-is.

[allthumbs]

Greetings

Rest assured that if that is his way of disciplining his daughter, it's no wonder that her attitude and motivation are on the wane. What was he thinking indeed!

Cheers

allthumbs

[Bob]

Take the phrase "... and it's your fault," and apply it to the end of any excuse.  Those are the most amusing and most annoying excuses I've heard.

"I didn't have time to practice, and it's your fault!"

"I lost my music, and it's your fault!"


On some high philosophical level, it might actually be my fault I suppose...

[gaer]

Okay, I feel better now *sigh*.  What's the best line you've heard as a teacher? 

I don't know where to start. If this thread continues, I'll try to add some "toppers".

My best adult student, who was and still is one of my closest friends, was an outstanding teacher in the public school system—second and third grade.

After I taught her a lesson—she is only one of three people I have ever taught in my home—we used to offically open up "the lemonade stand". You may remember Lucy and the lemonade stand from Charlie Brown.

She has moved, so although we still talk, it's not the same.

I wish we had a forum or sub-forum here: "The Lemonade Stand". Only a teacher fully understands what another teacher goes through.

My favorite (UN-favorite):

"What else do you do?"

When I hear that, I have to bite my tongue.

Gary

[lostinidlewonder]

Some things that happen quite consistiently with some of my younger students,

- Because I am have a lot of expression on my face when I hear things I agree with or not.

1st time they said:"That scary...."
Me: "What?"
Now continually says: "Don't open your eyes like that!!"
Me: "Try and do it this way then!"

- After putting my hands in the way about to demonstrate the notes,
*Lets me play a little then pushes my hand away impatiently* "WAIT! I CAN DO IT!!!!"
After they do it wrongly again, process continues until they actually do it

WAIT!!! lol

-
"Do you want a race?"
"At what?"
Starts describing a race track on the piano keyboard and what notes need to be played.
Rrrriiiiiiiight!

[gaer]

Some things that happen quite consistiently with some of my younger students,

- Because I am have a lot of expression on my face when I hear things I agree with or not.

1st time they said:"That scary...."
Me: "What?"
Now continually says: "Don't open your eyes like that!!"
Me: "Try and do it this way then!"

How old are these kids?

[lostinidlewonder]

That comment was from a girl aged 7 Usually I get something along the lines of,
"You are a slave driver" from my older students lol.

[joyfulmusic]

I had my first "dad-wants-him-to-take student over 40 years ago.  Hated it.  I absolutely will not teach someone who doesn't want to take.  Dang, it's hard enough to deal with all the other study and discipline techniques you have to cultivate.  Does anyone else find themselves wanting to go to sleep in a lesson with a kid who hasn't practiced? lol

[gaer]

Does anyone else find themselves wanting to go to sleep in a lesson with a kid who hasn't practiced? lol

Mostly I try very hard to hide the full extent of my irritation.

How about the kids who don't practice and don't bring their music?

Gary

[Bob]

How about the kids who don't practice and don't bring their music?
Gary

When it's possible, I pull out my own copy and then we work on it together.  Such fun we have!    

That definitely tells you how serious the student is.  I love seeing their jaw drop when I saw I have a spare copy of their music.  It's sad really and probably a sign that I should be doing more to inspire them, but...  that's how it goes with some students.

[dmk]

some good stories here...

I had a girl come in for a lesson, she had done no practice this week.  I asked her why and she promptly told me that she was busy playing at her first boyfriend's house on Monday and at her new boyfriend's house on Friday afternoon.

She was 6....amazing what kids these days say.

Another favourite of mine (although not practice related)....A 7 year old lad came in for his lesson and said to me "You look different" I told him I had just bought a new pair of glasses.  He then starting to wag his finger at me and whispered "you didn't take your mum shopping with you did you"...!!!!

cheers

dmk

[sonatainfsharp]

I had a 14 year old come in to her lesson with shorts and a string bikini top on once.

I have had several students whose parents use practicing as punishment, too.

[gaer]

When it's possible, I pull out my own copy and then we work on it together.  Such fun we have!    

That definitely tells you how serious the student is. 

Sometimes it's the parent who forgets the music. I have a lot of young students. And often the kids HAVE practiced. I have all the music I teach for the first few years notated in Finale, ready to be printed out on the spot.

I love seeing their jaw drop when I saw I have a spare copy of their music.  It's sad really and probably a sign that I should be doing more to inspire them, but...  that's how it goes with some students.

You can't inspire all students. You can only try to inspire a higher percentage of them.

Gary

[gaer]

I had a 14 year old come in to her lesson with shorts and a string bikini top on once.

I don't care what they come dressed in (or not dressed), but in extreme cases I'm very glad I have no lock on the teaching room and a window. Otherwise you could be in for a false charge of molestation, if you are a male teacher. It hasn't happened to me, but I know teachers who have faced this kind of problem.

I have had several students whose parents use practicing as punishment, too.

How about parents who STOP lessons, as punishment for something unrelated to piano.

Gary

[RealPianist]

How about you teachers, if your students come with not practising for a week?
 what will you do?

[bernhard]

How about you teachers, if your students come with not practising for a week?
 what will you do?

1. Use the lesson to practise. (mind you, at the beginning I do daily lessons  - but it will work on weekly lessons to: by the 3rd week they should get the message).

2. Alternatively, tell them to sit on a chair and practise yourself (no, they cannot read a book or draw or do their howework. They just have to sit quietly there and do nothing). If they think piuano lessons are boring, this will give them true perspective about boredom. I never had to use this more than once. At the end of the lesson I tell Mum (or Dad): "Today little Mozart just sat quietly through the lesson since we could not do anything since s/he had not practised". Since they are paying for the lessons, this one hits home pretty fast.

Sometimes people genuinely have problems practising, so you have to cut them some slack - with these ones I use option 1 - not as a punishment - but as a way to help them catch up with their practice. Option 2 is used when I am at the end of my tether with the students who are serial mock abouters, and think they are getting away with it.

Best wishes,
Bernhard.

[dinosaurtales]

So many of the kids in our area couldn't practice if they wanted to.  Monday evening is piano lesson.  Tuesday is soccer practice.  Wednesday night is ballet.  Thursday there's a family thing.  Friday is .........


Poor kids are just too tired to do it.  The parents require that the teacher live within spitting distance of their houses, so I doin't think they really care if the teacher is any good, or if the kid studies music at all.  it's just keeping the kid busy.  Too busy.   

[Bob]

I see lots of busy kids too.  They can pay your bills though and a few turn around.

I like Bernhard's idea of just sitting there doing nothing for the lesson if they haven't practiced.  "I sure wish you had practiced something so we had something to work on during this lesson.  This is really boring kid.  Hmm... 10 minutes left.  Ten long, long minutes.  Gosh, this boring kid.  I sure wish you'd practiced."   Wouldn't that be fun to turn it around like that?

I end up practicing for them (with them, do this do that type of teaching) and have kids start welling up with tears and red faces.  I guess I need to simplify my stuff, but whent they don't do anything, there's not much left.  Sometimes they need that nudge when faced with a new challenge or they never even try to overcome it.

[leahcim]

I like Bernhard's idea of just sitting there doing nothing for the lesson if they haven't practiced.  "I sure wish you had practiced something so we had something to work on during this lesson.  This is really boring kid.  Hmm... 10 minutes left.  Ten long, long minutes.  Gosh, this boring kid.  I sure wish you'd practiced."   Wouldn't that be fun to turn it around like that?

If you're rubbing it in like that with other stuff I'm not surprised they are in tears TBH.

Fair enough, "do nothing" in the extreme - but "sitting and making snide / sarcastic comments for 30 minutes" isn't "doing nothing" is it? Moreso if you see it as a source of gratification.

[nanabush]

When I was 14, I stole some fireworks for Canada day.. and my mom stopped me playin piano for 3 months, I wuz pretty freakin pissed.

[dinosaurtales]

I actually saw something like Bernhard's remarks in a MASTER CLASS with an ADULT in it recently.  The purpose was a Chopin workshop, the piece was Ballade #3. 

The student put the music on the stand, which did not bode well. Then he proceeded to play it like he had just picked upt he music last week and was running through it.

When he was "done", the instructor remarked that, had he been more prepared "we" could have perhaps worked in more depth.  Then he proceeded to show the guy how to finger the first few bars with the legato fingerings. ow!

[leahcim]

Yeah, a master class with an adult it's probably fair enough.

There's a difference between being firm and bullying though, even with adults. Most probably would expect the adult to get up and leave if you said "Sit there and do nothing" - the fact the child can't shows us that the child is under the care and power of the piano teacher.

So, even in a small sense, it's clearly a method that's taking advantage of the child's position. To me, practise sounds better, although I wouldn't have a huge problem with a child being made to sit and do nothing - I think it was clear that it wasn't supposed to actually achieve anything - other than affect some financial considerations the parents might have about the lessons - no doubt to get them to do what the teacher evidently doesn't feel they can do anything about.

But taken much further - abusing that power doesn't deserve respect or consideration. Certainly not in the name of "fun".

Drawing / sitting quietly / practising, and explaining why to parents and child all seem fair. Ramming the point home with derision doesn't, imo.

[celticqt]

If they are totally unprepared, I usually make them play scales, and believe me, they haven't learned to appreciate the value of those yet!

I must confess that I don't get on my students as much as I should about their practice time.  If I went to my lesson unprepared, my teacher would tell me to leave.  But I am an adult, and am taking lessons by choice.  With the kids who are forced to study by their parents, I simply try to get them to appreciate the value and beauty of music without totally turning them off to the piano. 

[Bob]

If you're rubbing it in like that with other stuff I'm not surprised they are in tears TBH.

Fair enough, "do nothing" in the extreme - but "sitting and making snide / sarcastic comments for 30 minutes" isn't "doing nothing" is it? Moreso if you see it as a source of gratification.

I meant "like" as in "found it amusing."  I imagined a scene where the student and teacher are just sitting there.  Teacher checks his watch.  Looks around.  Scratches.  Looks around.  It would be funny if there really were nothing to do if the student hadn't practiced -- that the student hadn't bought anything to lesson to work with but the student and teacher still have to put the time into the lesson anyway.  There's always something to do whether they've practiced a lot of none at all.