dear alistair,
what prompted destroying much of the pre-1985 output? just curious.
Er - common sense, methinks. As a matter of fact, it was not quite the destructive act that it may seem, for I was much more concerned (obviously) about what would be left. Most of what I destroyed was rubbish (or garbage, in American).
you met and had mr. benjamin britten mentor you? that's impressive.
I don't know about "impressive", but it was certainly most fortunate. I didn't study with him, but he was a great encouragement to me in what I was trying to do; he also helped me to be able to study at London's Royal College of Music.
i sense quite a travel from your early enthrallment with chopin's fourth ballade.
Well, inevitably, really - although Chopin in general and that work in particular still holds a very special place for me. In fact, I went on "quite a travel" very rapidly after that initial experience, as I met a teacher who had been a pupil of Webern before WWII and was accordingly thrust immediately into the mælstrom that was 1950s and 60s Darmstadt - Boulez, Nono, Stockhausen, etc. - before I'd really gotten accustomed to listening to almost any tonal music (I'd only heard a handful of tonal pieces before this); I discovered earlier music for myself gradually after this - via Schönberg, then Mahler, then Wagner, etc. When I first heard a Mozart piano concert (aged about 15, if I remember correctly), I thought that it sounded very strange - simply because that kind of sound world was hitherto unfamiliar to me (a reaction not dissimilar to that of "funny modern music" that you get from some people when they listen for the first time to a piece in a unfamiliar language).
i learned the second ballade - and it always sounded scotch/irish to me. was chopin somewhere on the islands for a while? was he following liszt around. and why, from scotland or ireland did he dedicate the second ballade to schumann? oh well. just wondering.
Whilst Chopin did indeed visit Scotland (and one of his last students was a Scotswoman), this did not happen until some time after he had composed the Second Ballade. By the way, what I wrote about Liszt and the Shetlands was a joke in the context of the thread in which I wrote it (although I have a suspicion that you may not have been the only one on this forum not to have picked up on that!). Anyway, I can't say that Chopin's F major Ballade sounds that was to me at all. Its dedication to Schumann revealed, in a back-handed kind of way, Chopin's inability even to grasp, let alone empathise with, Schumann's way of working; whereas Schumann is famously (and quite understandably) supposed to have said of Chopin "hats off, gentlemen - a genius!", Chopin's "response" was the very formal dedication of this work to "M. Robert Schumann". So, Schumann revered Chopin, but Chopin just didn't figure out Schumann at all, it would seem.
i guess that we won't worry about the pieces that you destroyed. although, i'm sure you (as all composers seem to) rued the day you did that!
With the benefit of this much hindsight, I do now rather rue the day that I destroyed my fourth piano trio, but that's about it; the remainder of what I binned (which I did at various times) simply needed to go. I've not discarded anything I've written since 1985, however.
Thanks for your interest - and apologies to anyone who needs them for this thread having gone somewhat off-topic for abit...
Best,
Alistair