Grade 8 Piano Exam :(

[schristina]

Okay, so my grade 8 RCM piano exam is in a week, and I feel completely unprepared. I always stumble on my scales, dominant 7ths, arpeggios, EVERYTHING! I am always unsure of all the notes and what I'm playing. I am not confident at all with my pieces too. I always stumble on all the pieces and have to start again and it's just soso frustrating! I hardly got any dynamics and I have horrible stage fright so I'm going to mess up for sure. Whenever I play in front of somebody, I play completely different than in practice in a bad way. I'm so nervous I can't even think straight. My sight reading is horrible too and the only thing I'm descent at is intervals. All the rest is BAD BAD BAD. I am so frustrated I've been crying everyday for the past month, I put so much pressure on myself. It has gotten really bad. I've even thought about suicide. I know it's really really really stupid I don't even know why I think that way. It's not just about piano though, things have been building up to make me think this way, but piano is not helping. I have 4 final exams next week and have to study for those because I pretty much forget almost everything.

I feel so stressed and worried. HELPP

Btw thanks so much for reading

[amelialw]

find something that calms you down and helps you relax!! About stage fright I'm sure almost everyone/everyone goes through that and you have to find a way to get around it; for me it took years to get over it sometimes practicing alot during the final week can do more harm then good.

How about your teacher? It's just my take but shouldn't your teacher advise you what to do or if you aren't ready your teacher should not be sending you for an exam

[leroy199]

i can understand your anxieties, these feelings you have may be more common then you think.  my suggestion might sound a bit strange but some times you must learn to accept what ever the result of your exams are,  what im trying to say is you must try and be ok with the way you play when you are stressed and nervous,  its ok to make mistakes its only an exam and that is not what your piano playing is about.  Music is an art and exams and competitions has no places in art.  be confident about what you can do and why you do it even if its only when you are alone,  if you play piano for the music and that should really be the only reason then the rest is secondary and is not worth all your energy and drama. 

[magic_sonata]

1.) First off, relax. Be confident in yourself, but not arrogant. Make yourself believe and think that you will do an amazing job. While taking your exam, imagine you are at home alone, with you goldfish and your dog.

2.) You are probably feeling the urge to practice all the time, since you feel insecure about your playing. But, believe it or not, don't over practice. Over practicing will lead to your memory and skills receding, because when we learn, our brain 'memorizes' all of the movements, the notes, and the dynamics unknowingly. Over practicing will diminish this amazing ability that our brains have.

3.) Concentrate on the things that you have trouble on. Drill them into your mind, like it's become a part of you. Don't let yourself get distracted. For the scales, here is a great way to memorize and get the hang of them (daily exercise):
1. Two octaves, HS, quarter, beat= 84, 100
2. Two octaves, HT, quarter, beat= 84, 100
3. Two octaves, HS, eighth, beat= 84, 100
4. Two octaves, HT, eighth, beat= 84, 100
5. Two octaves, HS, sixteenth, beat= 66, 69
6. Two octaves, HT, sixteenth, beat= 66, 69
7. Two octaves, eighth (RH) against quarter (LH), beat= 76, 84
8. Two octaves, eighth (LH) against quarter (RH), beat= 76, 84
9. Two octaves, triplet (RH) against quarter (LH), beat= 76, 84
10. Two octaves,triplet (LH) against quarter (RH),beat= 76, 84
CHALLENGE: Two octaves, triplet (RH) against eighth (LH), beat= 76, 84
Two octaves, triplet (LH) against eighth (RH), beat= 76, 84

4.) Get a good night's rest every day before the exam. Starting now, go to bed earlier than you usually would. Study has shown that after practice, sleeping will help your brain process all of the information that is has taken in. You will see a significant difference in your playing, and you would be surprisingly better at the thing you had trouble on the day before.

5.) Don't worry about it too much. Worrying will just make your stress peak grow even higher, and you will tense up too much while your playing. Relax, and practice like you would any other day. Just focus on what needs to be fixed, not how well or how bad you will do on the exam. Zone out into your little world when practicing, and you will fine.

[brogers70]

Please get yourself screened for depression. There are tricks to dealing with all the piano issues you mentioned, but you said these feelings are in all aspects of your life. Untreated depression is miserable. Getting it sorted out is very important, even moreso than the piano exam. Lots of people have been in your shoes and gotten to feeling better.

[schristina]

Thank you for your replies!

I'm trying my best to stay confident, my piano teacher has left for vacation 2 days ago and wished me luck. Tomorrow his sister will be teaching and in my opinion, is a better teacher. I know she will bring down my confidence though, because she will pick on all the things I need to work on, and yell at me. I usually leave the lesson almost in tears feeling like a complete failure. I know it's for the better, but it'll bring down my confidence.

I haven't even memorized my pieces, only one! I'm afraid to go in without the book because I usually get nervous and forget everything.

Maybe I'll think about the depression thing after the piano thing is over. It might go away after.

Thanks!! I have a little bit more confidence.

[cagal]

I have my exam in two days and am also not prepared - two pieces are not memorized or even close to being polished.  I was completely stressing out a month ago then decided the worst that could happen is I will try again in January if I don't get the mark I want.   I'm not doing this for school, to put food on the table or any other reason other than my own satisfaction and completing what I started long ago.  Soooo - when you start the exam, take a deep breath and enjoy the music you are going to be sharing and although easier said than done, try to relax.  My teacher tells me I'm too hard on myself and I'm sure you are too!