Learning when life is stressful

[pianocat3]

As is true of many people, at times my life becomes extremely stressful. The past few months have been like that. Piano actually helps manage the stress, but when times get worse, it's like my brain empties out and I can't focus at all in my playing. It all goes bad, very bad. . .then piano is just adding to my stress. How are you others pushing through this? It's serious family health problems that will go on a long time (not my health). Professional musicians do it somehow. As a student, I have not yet found a way. I haven't been able to play much for a week. It just all falls apart. It's like I never saw the piece before. I wonder if I should take a break and work theory more, but I think I will seriously backslide if I did that. The for any tips.

[bernadette60614]

I do hope the stress in your life eases.  I understand your feelings.  When my mother died, I didn't go near the keyboard for almost four months.

What helps me:

. I like the deep immersion of working on a particularly knotty piano problem. There are always those measures which seem to require extra focus, and I tend to "save those for later".  Of course, later doesn't come as often as it should.  So, I just take those measures in the pieces on which I'm working and I make it my goals to focus on those measures and those measures only during a practice session.  There is something so affirming and uplifting for me, at least, about finally conquering over those measures.

. My flood of stressful thoughts comes most often right in the a.m. or right before bedtime.  That period when you aren't fully awake or fully asleep.  I find going to the keyboard first thing or last thing in the day is like a refocusing of my mind to something where I feel that I can make progress.

.  Finally, I go for "deep practice".  I play as slowly and as loudly as I can.  It helps me to work on tonal production and to smooth over the rough spots I tend to hide with playing too fast or pedaling through.

Take care. 

[jockey]

I understand all about the problems of stress, and the positive effect it can have some times when you are able to `take time out ` from worrying over other issues, and concentrate on making progress with your piano practice,(learning), in spite of circumstances that you have no control over. That can be encouraging, and provide a sense of achievement.

However, there are times when this is temporarily out of the question because serious problems, like those you mention, i.e.  family health issues, and worry takes it`s toll on your own health, and you should not expect to be able to achieve your goals as you would normally expect. The best thing to do is not to stress out about it, and concentrate instead on looking after your own health by relaxing, eating sensibly, listening to your favourite music whether that is piano or other music, and ensure you are getting enough rest and sleep. You will be able to `take up where you left off' when circumstances improve.

This has just happened to me. I bought two new piano scores intending to learn something totally new, but I have not been able to make a serious attempt to work on them due to my own health problems, and other circumstances besides. However, I feel much better now than did previously, and I achieved quite a lot of progress,  to my way of thinking, this morning. I have had problems on and off for about three months, but all the work that I put in to learning prior to my problems, has paid off.

When circumstances improve, and you are feeling more `rested`,  you will be  able to do the same.      

[piulento]

Hi.
First of all, I hope things will work out for you, and that the stress will fade away with time.
It's true that under stress piano may sometimes seem "strange" and "unnatural", guess it's because some parts of the piece you're playing just don't "fit" what you're going through, or you just don't have the patience to take the piece too seriously.
In these kinds of situations I usually always just temporarily stop whichever piece I'm playing and move to one of my "comfort pieces". A comfort piece for me is a relatively easy and simple piece that fits the mood I'm under, so I can play it as much as I want, and only focus on the music and the way it makes me feel, instead of actually learning it.
For example, about two years ago I was in a really bad and stressful place in my life, and whenever I got back home from the army I didn't want to see or talk to anyone at all. So I just repeatedly played Chopin's mazurka 68/4 and nocturne 15/3, which I felt were suiting the way I feel. It gave my piano playing a change of view, and helped me focus on working out my issues. It's kind of nice, it's like some kind of therapy.
Anyway, I highly recommend it. Just take your time and focus on a familiar and comforting piece.
Best of luck!

[bronnestam]

Don't be afraid of taking a break. It does not matter if the break lasts for months or even years; you will be able to regain everything soon after you have started again. Not at once of course, but eventually you will probably find that you are playing better than ever.

Piano playing is not like olympic gymnastics, it is not like this is a once-in-a-lifetime chance that will be gone for ever if you put your piano studies on hold for a while. 

I am a living proof of this. My break was for decades! And I can also tell you about pianists who went through personal disasters and accidents and were not able to play for months or years, and they came back to full strength and even more, as life experiences tend to make you a better pianist. (Have you watched the movie "The Pianist"?) My own break was not about such dramatic things, thank God. I just didn't have the time and motivation. When I started again after nearly thirty years, I played like a beginner at first, but now I have since long surpassed my previous standard, and I feel this loooong break was good for my development.

So, I simply recommend you to not feel any stress and anxiety over your piano studies. Play the way you feel good, don't feel any pressure, deal with whatever you have to deal with, use your piano for gaining strength and harmony instead of the opposite.

[reiyza]

I can relate to that as well, I have little emotional stress but I have too much physical stress due to night shifts at work(can't seem to make good use of post practice improvement), it's very hard to focus when you are distracted by other things especially stress, it feels as if even when you want to focus on one thing, you can only focus for a moment then you begin to think about your problems again. And then your practice time would be wasted.

Taking a break is a real good thing, forgetting pieces might not seem such a bad idea. And after you've recovered from your stress, relearning them from scratch again will help you memorize or understand your piece(s) even better.

[pianocat3]

Thank you all for the extremely thoughtful responses.

I ended up not playing much for about 2 weeks, a little plinking here and there, but not much. I worked hard on music theory instead, because for some reason I had no trouble thinking about that, just playing the piano. What gives with that??? Anyway, my highly experienced teacher was not thrown off her pace one bit when I showed up not having practiced at all. She gave me some theory work to do and discussed and reviewed what I learned. Then she had me practice transposing on the fly, which I did not realize pianists even did that. I needed to get my theory better anyway, so it was not any time wasted, it turned out! I am sure there will be more serious health setbacks, these problems won't resolve anytime soon, so I will refer back when I need a hand up. For now, there was very good news today, and my playing came right back like it was never gone. It is the strangest thing! Thank you all!

[leemond2008]

I had this a while back, I had a few family things going on, I had money troubles and I was trying to prepare for a job interview, I'd been practicing fine and sitting at the piano seemed to be the only place I could relax, I had a lesson, my teacher was a few minutes late so I decided to swat up on my interview before she arrived.
When she got there everything just fell apart, I couldn't even play the simplest of scales, I'd really prgressed on the pieces that I had been learning since the last lesson but it was a waste of time because she couldn't see what I had done because it was as if I had never seen these pieces before, I was getting so frustrated and snappy in that lesson it was untrue, not at my teacher but at myself, we finished up with a bit of theory and that actually felt much better, my teacher seemed to understand completely and just told me to take a few days off and not to force myself to practice.

I think I took about 5 days off music completely, when I went back I was in the same position so instead of trying to practice the pieces I was learning I went back to some real bog standard easy pieces that I already knew and I focused of playing the piano rather than learning it if that makes sense, after a day or two of that I felt refreshed and got right back into it.

Maybe you could give that a go, just go back to some simple stuff you know and can play with your eyes closed rather than the more complicated stuff that requires a bit more concentration.

[dcstudio]

, and my playing came right back like it was never gone. It is the strangest thing! Thank you all!

this should tell you just how much your own brain can get in your way.  Glad to hear you are doing better

[pianocat3]

Well my gift for switching to theory is I am tearing my hair out learning to transpose as I sight read lol!! I have discovered I do not read by intervals much at all! I thought I did, but I just had chord shapes memorized and played the other stuff reading the actual notes. I will probably follow up with these issues on another thread, but I haven't tried hard yet. Thanks for the positive reinforcement.

[dcstudio]

Well my gift for switching to theory is I am tearing my hair out learning to transpose as I sight read lol!! .

a great skill to have and one that takes a little time to master... good for you!

[pianocat3]

I should start another thread, but maybe there's a short answer. If I practice transposing, I have to read intervals it seems. Will that interval reading eventually and automatically cross over to all my sight reading?

[dcstudio]

I should start another thread, but maybe there's a short answer. If I practice transposing, I have to read intervals it seems. Will that interval reading eventually and automatically cross over to all my sight reading?

so you are reading and then thinking up or down a 3rd or whatever when you transpose at sight? Is that what you mean by reading intervals---or are you reading the melodic and harmonic intervals within the score? 

 I have found that when I read in one key and play in another then I tend to have issues playing that piece again in the original key from the original score--I want to play it in the transposed key.
   

[handz]

good topic, my life is stressing me a lot  because of work and it is really hard to concentrate on playing. I can play but nothing gets to my head from. Memorizing of pieces is really hard then.  But playing itself is actually a nice stress reliever.

[pianocat3]

Dcstudio ummmmm. What? Lol!!! I am reading a third, a fifth for example, then try to do the new keys introducing sharps or flats or natural as appropriate. When I sight read not transposing, it seems I am reading the actual notes unless it's a memorized chord arpeggio, or i can see its jyst a scale of course. Was that clear? My teacher has had to fill in education holes for me since I didn't get much before. My memory is so poor I have no worries about learning the new key unless I did it a lot, e.g. accompanying a singer over and over. I'm not good enough yet so I just don't know.

I don't think I iknow what melodic and harmonic intervals are yet or maybe I was told and forgot. It takes me 2-3 tries to get this stuff in my head.

On original topic, I find the whole stress thing strange because I wasn't consciously worrying, but clearly I was worrying in the background because I got good news and all is well with piano now. !!! This has only ever happened to me in piano.

[dcstudio]

Dcstudio ummmmm. What? Lol!!! I am reading a third, a fifth for example, then try to do the new keys introducing sharps or flats or natural as appropriate. When I sight read not transposing, it seems I am reading the actual notes unless it's a memorized chord arpeggio, or i can see its jyst a scale of course. Was that clear? My teacher has had to fill in education holes for me since I didn't get much before. My memory is so poor I have no worries about learning the new key unless I did it a lot, e.g. accompanying a singer over and over. I'm not good enough yet so I just don't know.

I don't think I iknow what melodic and harmonic intervals are yet or maybe I was told and forgot. It takes me 2-3 tries to get this stuff in my head.

On original topic, I find the whole stress thing strange because I wasn't consciously worrying, but clearly I was worrying in the background because I got good news and all is well with piano now. !!! This has only ever happened to me in piano.

apologies as I wasn't very clear either...   so you have a piece in D and the singer needs it in C do you read the note/chord/interval then think "down a whole step?"  I visually move it down in my head on the staff and sometimes if it is more difficult I will pencil in a few chord changes.   Transposing up a fourth hurts my brain so I will generally think down a fifth which is easier for me.  this is what I meant.

[pianocat3]

Oh I do it the first way. I'll try your way!!! What an awesome tip!! Now if it's a big change, OK I was doing a minor to e minor, would that trick still work? I was transposing a minor to d and e minor, ended up kinbda learning the piece and then it was by ear more than by reading.  I saw my teacher today and said I need to do major first, minor was too hard. She skipped a theory book because I knew almost all of it, but there are little gaps. What a great tip though. Now I'm all fired up. I'm supposed to go between major and minor too. Lol how about transpose to Dorian. Maybe I will slip that in for kicks ;-) I don't know that she uses that trick. We cover a lot of ground and maybe she forgot to say though. I am enthused. Thanks!