Leaving A Teacher

[Nana_Ama]

My mother has told me that I am going to get a new teacher this fall and I don't know how I should tell my teacher without offending her or hurting her feelings.  We are really close and I feel bad about, yet at the same time I would like to move onto another teacher.  How do I express this in a polite and sincere way?

-Nana

P.S
Also, how do you make the transition between teachers easier to adjust to? Are there any steps you take? 

[ludwig]

hi nana_ama,

      I think its only natural that people change teachers, so they can benefit from a variety of techniques and intepretations. Learning from different teachers will expand your experiences and knowledge for further improvements. Just tell your teacher the truth, say that you appreciate everything she has done for you, with specific things you achieved with her, and her influences on you, and explain that you feel the need for a differernt input, some different inteptretations and styles so you can really explore and find your own style of playing music, and this can only occur from what you have been exposed to. I recently changed teachers too, (after 9 or 10 years) with my favourite teacher, I just wasn't absorbing anything new to inspire me to play... It was very awkward for me and I think my teacher got my point without me spelling everything out, which was very lucky. There were some sad feelings but understanding was the key, sometimes you have to let go for your students to achieve more.

[abell88]

Ludwig has given a very good answer. I would also suggest that it's your mother's job to tell the teacher (since it's apparently her decision), but if, for whatever reason, she is not willing/able to do so, you can explain to the teacher that your mother wants you to go to another teacher. 

[piano_world]

hi nana_ama,

i think, it must be YOUR decision to change teachers...cause YOU ve to know and feel...now its enough...I need to ve other experiences or what ever...or ur teacher says always the same things...etc

and then tell ur old teacher, that u ve to find our own way to play etc... and that u need other opinions to make things easier for u and ur playin...

but it always depends on u...dont forget that

[joyfulmusic]

I just read a novel, "Body and Soul".  It's about child prodigy and how his life unfolds and all the different teachers he has and how they influenced him.  I couldn't put it down.  I think it would give you a broader view.  Personally, I would be excited if I had a student who had advanced to the point where they knew they wanted more and different methods than miine.  I would feel that I had served them well if they were taking charge of their own process.

[pianodump]

I also agree with Lugwig.  I just changed to a new teacher too.  It's hard for me the leave my old teacher cos he was really a good teacher but i also found that he got nothing new to inspire me.  I think at different stages we need different teachers. 

[thalberg]

What an awkward situation!  I feel so bad for you.  I've been through this myself about four times, and it never went smoothly. 

There's no particular phrase or way of handling it that will remove the awkwardness.

The best advice I have for you:  stick to your decision, don't give in because of guilt, and just realize that it's simply going to be unpleasant and you have to get through it--and it will be a very short discussion unless your teacher is an egotistical control freak, which doesn't sound like the case.  Teachers who are decent human beings (99% of them) realize you feel bad and try not to  prolong your suffering.  They've likely been through this before, believe it or not.

 Every time I changed teachers it was for the better. I never regretted it once.

Now I'm a teacher, and I recently had an 8 year old student leave me.  The parents made the decision, and they felt incredibly terrible because they liked me and they thought it would hurt me.  You know what?  It didn't hurt me.  I saw I wasn't getting results out of her, and I was actually glad they changed teachers.  I was planning soon to suggest they try someone else.  There's a chance your teacher is not oblivious to your problem, and may not fault you for leaving.

[Astyron]

Nobody really addressed your question about how to make the change to a new teacher easier.  When my students tell me they are moving or going to a new teacher I write up a one to two page summary of their work with me in the last few years.  I include the names of books used, significant pieces worked on, specific technique worked on, the student's strengths and weaknesses, how their performance technique is, and a small bit about their personality.

I don't think you should ask your present teacher to write up all of the above, but you COULD ask your teacher, after your mother explains about moving on to a new teacher, to write up a brief summary of your progress, strengths and weaknesses as a pianist to give to your new teacher.  If you have as good of a relationship with him/her as you say you do, then I don't think they would be opposed to doing this for you.  I have never recieved such a writeup from a student when they've transfered into my studio but I've often thought how much easier it would be to get to know them and understand what level to start at and what literature to do much sooner.  That is why I started writing them myself.  Those past students I've kept in touch with (those that moved to other states for example) have shared with me that their new teachers found my summaries helpful, though often times the new teacher has gone in a completely different direction.  That's fine, but at least they knew where the student came from.

Give it a try.  I'm sure your teacher will adjust quickly to your leaving their studio and if you're lucky they'll write you a summary.   Good luck.

Astyron

[thalberg]

Great idea.