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Topic: What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs...  (Read 2171 times)

Offline jhon

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I timed while listening and learned that the 1st concerto has much longer orchestral intro - almost 5 minutes - than the 2nd - which is just half of the 1st (approximately 2.5 minutes).

What to do during that long period...options.... :D :D

stare at the keyboard
glance each audience
take a nap
walk around the stage

Offline Rach3

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Quote
stare at the keyboard
glance each audience
take a nap
walk around the stage

None of these. If you have any respect for the audience and their focus on the orchestra, you will above all not distract attention. You will certainly want to listen to what the orchestra is doing (since you'll likely be playing the same motives as them). Of course, if you're like most people you'll be so nervous that you won't be aware of any 'waiting' at all - for at least your first few concerto performances.

If you need something to look at, look at the conductor.

Don't stare at the audience, they'll get nervous.

-Rach3
"Never look at the trombones, it only encourages them."
--Richard Wagner

Offline cadenz

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its very hard not to break out playing something so work on  john cage's 4'33 some.
but otherwise you could do something entertaining such as solving rubiks cube with your feet or juggling 5 clubs while bouncing a ball on your head.
when i saw the first chopin piano concerto performed the pianist just sat there gazing at the orchestra/conductor/piano keys though.

Offline Rach3

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Quote
its very hard not to break out playing something so work on  john cage's 4'33 some.

?!
"Never look at the trombones, it only encourages them."
--Richard Wagner

Offline jhon

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Sorry for you to take it seriously...I really intended to make this more of a JOKE...

Offline Rach3

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Oh.
"Never look at the trombones, it only encourages them."
--Richard Wagner

Offline orlandopiano

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Great opportunity for some situps or crunches. Or if you're not the fitness type, a quick game of solitaire might work well.

Offline Motrax

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There's no better time to practice your atonal singing!
"I always make sure that the lid over the keyboard is open before I start to play." --  Artur Schnabel, after being asked for the secret of piano playing.

Offline Waldszenen

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Dance along to the music

Break dancing is particularly effective but make sure you don't kick any of the musicians by accident - they won't thank you for it.
Fortune favours the musical.

Offline whynot

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bring a beer and have a small pizza delivered right to the piano (use a coaster-- it's polite)

Offline Teddybear

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Re: What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs...
Reply #10 on: July 11, 2005, 09:02:52 PM
Heheheheh.  ;D This is the first topic that has made me laugh. "What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs..."

I'd go for looking at the orchestra and the conductor, although I think reading a newspaper would be awfully funny. I don't think the audience would agree.  ;D

T
Teddybear

  (>"<)
('(, )")
'( )/
..J

Offline musicsdarkangel

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Re: What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs...
Reply #11 on: July 11, 2005, 10:19:47 PM
I actually would love to do something funny.


I don't know.  If I could, I would.

Hmmmmmm


Haha sleeping on the piano would look so aweful.

How about doing a dance?  Or headbanging?

Offline fnork

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Re: What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs...
Reply #12 on: July 12, 2005, 12:03:03 AM
Imagine this concerto being conducted by someone who's making his debut as a conductor, and after the long orchestral introduction when the piano is supposed to make an entry, nothing happens.... so the nervous conductor turns around a bit to see whats up with the pianist and sees that he/she has fallen asleep on the grand piano..  ;D

Offline Waldszenen

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Re: What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs...
Reply #13 on: July 12, 2005, 12:07:13 AM
Heheheheh.  ;D This is the first topic that has made me laugh. "What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs..."

I'd go for looking at the orchestra and the conductor, although I think reading a newspaper would be awfully funny. I don't think the audience would agree.  ;D

T


Reading a newspaper is genius! :P

Here are some of my suggestions:

- Stand right next to the conductor and wave your arms around like he does

- Shine your shoes

- Brush your teeth

- Offer some lip-balm to the concertmaster

- Listen to a CD through a walkman

- Pluck one of the concertmaster's strings and giggle like a little kid

- Shine the conductor's shoes

- Tell him his breath stinks and offer some Tic Tacs - if he refuses throw them at him

- Sling-shot some tic tacs to some of the back row musicians, like the timpanist

- Chuck a basketball onto the timpani and hope that it strikes at the right beat
Fortune favours the musical.

Offline AvoidedCadence

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Re: What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs...
Reply #14 on: July 12, 2005, 12:10:10 AM
i) Keep time with the pedal.  Loudly.
ii)Improvise a ground bass. (For added challenge, pretend your piano is a B-natural instrument instead of a C-concert)
iii)Mimic, with very exaggurated gestures, whatever the conductor is doing, behind his back.
iv)Repeatedly press keys silently, as if testing the action.  Stand up and begin tapping the strings inside the piano.
v) Break out a triangle or some cymbals and hide in the back with the percussion.
vi) Repeatedly adjust tie/hair/glasses/shoes/suit/tuxedo/dress.
vii) Play arpeggios/octaves in the air above the keyboard.  Swing your arms in large circles.  Stretch your wrists/shoulders/neck.
viii) Take out your cell phone and make a call.  Better yet, have someone call YOU seconds before the piano entry.
ix) Screw up your eyes and forehead and repeatedly play the opening bars over and over again in the air, as if trying to remember how the piano enters.  Shake your head after each attempt.
x) Breathe in and make a head gesture, placing your hands suddenly on the keys, as if about to start in a horribly wrong spot.
xi) Stand up and begin lecturing the audience on the Brahms concerto you are about to perform (assuming you're playing Chopin).  Repeatedly look at the conductor and orchestra in irritation.
xii) Look around the stage in bewilderment, consult your day-planner, and go and sit in the audience.
xiii) Gesture and whisper irritably to your page turner even though you don't have any music on the piano.

Er... actually, I'd recommend putting your hands in your lap, head perhaps bowed slightly (or looking at the conductor).  Overall don't let the audience see that you're very nervous.  Think positive thoughts.  After all, if you are playing a Chopin concerto on stage with orchestra, you really should have the piece in very good condition.  Use your kinesthetic sense - are you sitting properly? Tensing up your shoulders/neck?  Hunching over?  Holding your breath?
Always play as though a master listened.
 - Robert Schumann

Offline i_m_robot

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Re: What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs...
Reply #15 on: July 12, 2005, 12:10:33 AM
pull out a cig and light the way
WATASHI NO NAMAE WA

AI EMU ROBATO DESU

立派のエビの苦闘及びは立派である

Offline firststrike

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Re: What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs...
Reply #16 on: July 12, 2005, 01:46:13 AM
Look at the conductor and silently mouth the words, "What the F*** is this man?  I thought we were playing the SECOND concerto!!!!"

Offline Etude

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Re: What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs...
Reply #17 on: July 12, 2005, 01:46:37 AM
1)  Copy the viola part a semitone higher. ;)

2)  Keep giving the orchestra an A.

3)  Give blood.   

4)  Pull out a copy of the Grieg concerto, flick over the pages with a confused expression, occasionally scratching your head.   ;D

5) Draw a caricature of the conductor.
    Show the conductor just before your first entry

6) Practice facial expressions.

7) Loudly crack your knuckles.

8 ) Sit at the side of the piano with a chair, place the sheetmusic on the stand, occasionaly looking backstage for the pianist.

9) Prepare the piano with screws, bolts and pieces of rubber.

10)  Look on the piano for an on button.

11)  "Accidentally" catch the keyboard with your hand.

12)  Order a pizza.

13)  Listen to a CD.

14)  Talk with some of the audience members.

15)  Practice forearm clusters silently.


Offline quantum

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Re: What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs...
Reply #18 on: July 12, 2005, 03:31:03 AM
Imagine this concerto being conducted by someone who's making his debut as a conductor, and after the long orchestral introduction when the piano is supposed to make an entry, nothing happens.... so the nervous conductor turns around a bit to see whats up with the pianist and sees that he/she has fallen asleep on the grand piano..  ;D

Why fall asleep on the piano, much too uncomfortable.  Climb inside that 9 footer and take a nap.  You don't have to worry if the roof is leaking, because you even have a lid over you.  Don't forget your blanky....

You coud hide in the orchestra pretending to play an instrument at the start.  At the moment just before your entry you run to the piano and start playing. 

Hide under the stage, and come out of the trap door just before your entry. 

Ask an usher if you can be escorted to the washroom. 

Pull out the action of the piano and examine it. 

Bring a feather duster and clean the piano.  You may want to ask if someone in the audience has a swiffer instead. 

Ask one of the string players for any broken hairs from their bow.  Floss your teeth. 

Ask one of the string players to borrow their bow, and draw it across the edge of a metal music stand.  You really should try that, it's such a wonderful sound.....that it's used in horror movies so much. 

Look for another piano in the corner of the hall, run over and compare if it's better than the one that's on stage. 

Count the keys on the piano.  Have big chart paper and easel on stage so you can draw counting sticks.  When you're finished, tell the audience how many you found.  Then ask them if you were supposed to count the black ones too?

Made a Liszt. Need new Handel's for Soler panel & Alkan foil. Will Faure Stein on the way to pick up Mendels' sohn. Josquin get Wolfgangs Schu with Clara. Gone Chopin, I'll be Bach

Offline BoliverAllmon

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Re: What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs...
Reply #19 on: July 12, 2005, 04:25:24 AM
None of these. If you have any respect for the audience and their focus on the orchestra, you will above all not distract attention. You will certainly want to listen to what the orchestra is doing (since you'll likely be playing the same motives as them). Of course, if you're like most people you'll be so nervous that you won't be aware of any 'waiting' at all - for at least your first few concerto performances.

If you need something to look at, look at the conductor.

Don't stare at the audience, they'll get nervous.

-Rach3

need to chill man

Offline jhon

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Re: What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs...
Reply #20 on: July 12, 2005, 07:37:03 PM
Or just DON'T MOVE completely - like a sitting statue/maniquin - then suprise the audience in that first notes of the piano part...

Offline gouldfischer

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Re: What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs...
Reply #21 on: July 12, 2005, 07:41:54 PM
1. Sit with your back facing the piano and try to devise the best arm position to play that way;

2. Practice the C major scale on the lid, very slowly, trying to figure out if either TU or TO best suits you (with an awed look);

3. Play chess with yourself on one of those pocket size tables;

4. Take a look at some cheap naked women magazines;

5. Show them to the tuba player;

6. Blindfold yourself with a black cloth and then do not remove it completely, but only move it up a little to your forehead and start playing as if you were Rambo himself;

7. Place a big digital clock on the top of the piano, and start 5 minute countdown right at the first beat... (just remember not to turn the alarm function on...)

8. Ok, so you want to sleep... fine... but now you HAVE to turn the alarm function on!... better scheduling Pink Floyd's "Time" introduction to wake you up at the eleventh hour, then...

9. Flirt with the oboist. If she despises you, try to look under her skirt.

10. Post something to this topic, using your bluetooth notebook.

Offline pianonut

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Re: What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs...
Reply #22 on: July 12, 2005, 09:20:04 PM
this is too much!  this is what i'm going to bring to my first day of class on 'the concerto.'  i wonder if instrumentalists have it harder - being that they have to stand up and (getting kinda dizzy or shaky). 

what if - as mayla says, if you don't start playing right away - your leg starts shaking uncontrollably.

what if - the violinist gave the wrong note out to the orchestra (A-543 or something) -

do you have the right to make them do the whole introduction over in the correct key?

what if you silently hit the first note of the piano part and the piano is out of tune?  could you pull out a tuning kit and tune it during the introduction?

OR - WORSE - the piano slowly goes out of tune with each movemetn.  ending with horrible sounds.  was the introduction important anyway?  what about the ending?

one last question:  do you have the right to slow down the tempo to your liking - if the long introduction leads to a super fast tempo ( and you are not warmed up).  or maybe, you start moving your fingers really quick to try to merge (like a car onto the freeway - working up speed) with the orchestra.

ok.  the very last question:  must you look up before you start playing?  this is such a traditional thing, to get the cue from the conductor.  i mean, what if you got your cue from someone else?  like the way someone looked at you from the audience.  wide eyes.  expectant.  would it be more interesting to miss the cue and watch the audience fall apart sort of like a strike out at a ball game.  what is the worst thing that can happen?  the moaning from the audience when they have to hear the intro all over again?
do you know why benches fall apart?  it is because they have lids with little tiny hinges so you can store music inside them.  hint:  buy a bench that does not hinge.  buy it for sturdiness.

Offline BoliverAllmon

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Re: What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs...
Reply #23 on: July 12, 2005, 10:37:08 PM
I was told to hum along with the orchestra to yourself. THis helps get the creative juices going.

boliver

Offline Waldszenen

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Re: What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs...
Reply #24 on: July 13, 2005, 01:20:05 AM
1. Sit with your back facing the piano and try to devise the best arm position to play that way;

2. Practice the C major scale on the lid, very slowly, trying to figure out if either TU or TO best suits you (with an awed look);

3. Play chess with yourself on one of those pocket size tables;

4. Take a look at some cheap naked women magazines;

5. Show them to the tuba player;

6. Blindfold yourself with a black cloth and then do not remove it completely, but only move it up a little to your forehead and start playing as if you were Rambo himself;

7. Place a big digital clock on the top of the piano, and start 5 minute countdown right at the first beat... (just remember not to turn the alarm function on...)

8. Ok, so you want to sleep... fine... but now you HAVE to turn the alarm function on!... better scheduling Pink Floyd's "Time" introduction to wake you up at the eleventh hour, then...

9. Flirt with the oboist. If she despises you, try to look under her skirt.

10. Post something to this topic, using your bluetooth notebook.





BA AHHHA
Fortune favours the musical.

Offline abell88

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Re: What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs...
Reply #25 on: July 13, 2005, 07:55:59 PM
1. Lead the audience in an aerobics workout

2. Take pictures of the orchestra and the audience with your cellphone.

3. Face the audience and count them.

4. Take out some knitting...after a few stitches, rip it out in obvious frustration.

5. Take out some knitting...let your ball of wool roll into the audience.

6. Take out several bottles of vitamins, line up the pills on the piano, and proceed to swallow them.

7. Take out a bottle of wine...have an audience member help you with the corkscrew.

8. Play charades with the audience.

9. Screw wads of cotton wool into your ears.

Offline maxy

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Re: What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs...
Reply #26 on: July 15, 2005, 07:08:57 PM
it is the perfect time to realize you badly need to go to the washroom...  :-[

Offline Skeptopotamus

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Re: What to do during the LONG orchestral intro of Chopin PCs...
Reply #27 on: July 15, 2005, 10:51:13 PM
smoke a cigarette.  it would be cool until you realized it destroyed your career, but it would still be such a cool thing to do it might even be worth it ^^ (im not saying smoking is generally cool)
 

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