How to encourage your students to be/become friends... (?)

[m1469]

I am starting a class for some of my students in about a month in which a group of them will be meeting consistently.  One of my goals is to help them become friends, not just friendly toward one another, but deep friends that possibly last a lifetime.

I know time will tell with the lifetime aspect of those friendships, but I am wondering what ideas people may have on how to encourage friendships between students ?  Perhaps there are ways of altering the environment which could encourage a drawing together of the students (?). 

My thought right now is to develop a strong bond between myself and each of them individually that will perhaps give them some kind of mutual understanding amongst them, that only they (in the world) could share (sounds weird, but I think it might be on to something).  Not positive as to how to go about this one either but I think I am already doing this to an extent (always looking for more ideas, however).


I appreciate views from the student's as well as teacher's perspectives.



Thanks,
m1469 

[pianistimo]

is the class entitled 'musical etiquette' or is it theory related, or piano related? 

i tend to get right to the point nowdays, figuring that if students can't be nice to one another, why should i be a policewoman?  but, then again, maybe there is some teaching involved taht parents don't do anymore.  especially with the advent of movies like 'mean girls.'  here the girls are glorified for being mean.  if i had a couple of students and one was  obviously better than the other, i would try to put both of them in the light of learning from one another.  giving equal time to the views of both if they are critiquing each others playing (even if the younger or lesser player was not able to communicate as well as the older).  giving equal time to talk lets you hear the views of all (on many subjects) and encourages a bond by sharing thoughts. 

we do this in church.  after the services and lunch, we all get together and just sit and talk about stuff.  one person says one thing, and then people agree/disagree add to it, take it and talk about something it reminds them of.  we have all become good friends because we take EXTRA time to be together.  this is probably what you mean by the extra class since piano lessons aren't really a time to socialize with other pianists.  i think what you are doing is a good idea,  IF you have time, energy, and passion to do it.  not many people would or could.  kids do need guidance in how to be friendly, polite, and even know concert etiquette.  as long as what you say doesn't bother the parents, i don't see why you couldn't incorporate the rules that many corporations bring in (tolerance, etc.) about behavior in the work place.  whether playing the piano or in a business setting, you have to learn how to create cooperation or people just begin to bicker and fight and you have ADULTS behaving like they are in kindergarten.

[Bob]

Duets or some type of project where the students work together.  It's not so much about the teacher as it is the students spending time together and working together.  Have them do something that requires they are in charge of themselves and need to work outside of class.  Since it's independent you can't control whether they become friends or not, but they can become "collegial."  The teacher can emphasize how it's important to learn things from each other and that everyone has something they do well so everyone can learn something from anyone.

[m1469]

is the class entitled 'musical etiquette' or is it theory related, or piano related? 

Yeah, sorry I did not explain this very well.  I am starting a "studio class" of sorts.   It is designed primarily to center around the pieces my students are working on (and more performance opportunity),  but will include much, much more than that also.  They will do group projects and these things, we will cover some history, theory, conducting... etc.

These are great suggestions pianistimo and Bob.  I have been thinking about having a lunch with them on these days, so I am encouraged to do so now.  Duets are a great idea...


m1469

[pianistimo]

you're the kind of teacher people wish they had.  not all teachers have the time, patience, and endurance for younger students.  this really sets them up to be able to handle stress (playing a lot for each other in unstressful yet 'practice' surrounding) and to practice stage presence, speaking skills, posture, friendliness, etc.  each student contributes something to help others learn.  and, as bob says, you can make it into a place for duets and stuff to be part of the time where they learn independently.  that's a great idea, too. 

must admit that my wcu teacher took time, also...we (5-6 students) went on field trip to steinway hall (and i will eternally be grateful because it is a beautiful place with cool pianos, artists pics, and really wonderful paintings of the great pianists ), steinway factory. (i got to go twice because of two years of lessons).  this has to be the highlight of my life.  as well as a piano concert at carnegie hall, visiting julliard, and walking around in nyc (visiting the museaum of fine arts).  also, went to dinner, and to starbucks.  i would never know how to get there, let alone to get in at the prices we got!   some teachers DO go out of their way to help you expand and learn.   for anyone in pennsylvania - take from carl cranmer at west chester university.  (*hopes there's still room for lessons in the fall if he gets more students).  if you ever get a chance to hear him play, he's really awesome.

[Bob]

Don't forget parties and food.  That always makes people happy.  Or watch piano movies as a class.

Or have a piano studio dance! 


Or the class meets and you give a presentation.  You can talk about how to prepare a piece or present a certain piece of well-known music to them.  You can play piano cd's for them and make it a listening class once in awhile.  Or have discussions -- or whatever topic you present, or what they are working on -- the problems they have, the things they try, the solutions they find.  Bring in a guest once in awhile.  Have them perform for each other frequently.  The group stuff has been mentioned.  You could also do something like having them each pick a Bach invention -- Everyone picks a different one and you cover the whole thing as a class.  Then make a CD or DVD as a class.  Have them practice auditioning.  Have them listen and critique each other.  Have them pick a topic and present it to the class.  Have them pick a composer to present to the class and play a piece by that composer -- duh... just have them present the background of the composer of the piece they're working on.  During the class you can really "impart" your own philosophy and what you want them to do -- Want them to work hard?  Tell them about Bach and how hard he had it but how he overcame things.  Find a performing pianist and have them mention how difficult they have to work to survive.



(The dance bit is a joke of course.)

[m1469]

you're the kind of teacher people wish they had.  not all teachers have the time, patience, and endurance for younger students.  this really sets them up to be able to handle stress (playing a lot for each other in unstressful yet 'practice' surrounding) and to practice stage presence, speaking skills, posture, friendliness, etc.  each student contributes something to help others learn.  and, as bob says, you can make it into a place for duets and stuff to be part of the time where they learn independently.  that's a great idea, too. 

must admit that my wcu teacher took time, also...we (5-6 students) went on field trip to steinway hall (and i will eternally be grateful because it is a beautiful place with cool pianos, artists pics, and really wonderful paintings of the great pianists ), steinway factory. (i got to go twice because of two years of lessons).  this has to be the highlight of my life.  as well as a piano concert at carnegie hall, visiting julliard, and walking around in nyc (visiting the museaum of fine arts).  also, went to dinner, and to starbucks.  i would never know how to get there, let alone to get in at the prices we got!   some teachers DO go out of their way to help you expand and learn.   for anyone in pennsylvania - take from carl cranmer at west chester university.  (*hopes there's still room for lessons in the fall if he gets more students).  if you ever get a chance to hear him play, he's really awesome.

Some kind of field trip could be a fabulous idea.

Or the class meets and you give a presentation. You can talk about how to prepare a piece or present a certain piece of well-known music to them. You can play piano cd's for them and make it a listening class once in awhile. Or have discussions -- or whatever topic you present, or what they are working on -- the problems they have, the things they try, the solutions they find. Bring in a guest once in awhile. Have them perform for each other frequently. The group stuff has been mentioned. You could also do something like having them each pick a Bach invention -- Everyone picks a different one and you cover the whole thing as a class. Then make a CD or DVD as a class. Have them practice auditioning. Have them listen and critique each other. Have them pick a topic and present it to the class. Have them pick a composer to present to the class and play a piece by that composer -- duh... just have them present the background of the composer of the piece they're working on. During the class you can really "impart" your own philosophy and what you want them to do -- Want them to work hard? Tell them about Bach and how hard he had it but how he overcame things. Find a performing pianist and have them mention how difficult they have to work to survive.

This stuff is what I am planning to have be the core of the class-work and experience.  I guess what I am after are things that are more or less "behind the scenes"... they experience it, but not as a project or anything.  I don't really know how to define it, though maybe through the course of our class time together and the projects they undertake, that will be enough for them to develop their friendships... hmmmm

Thanks for your suggestions pianistimo and Bob,

m1469