what inspires you more - negative or positive comments?

[stevie]

which inspires you to work more and harder?

positive comments and encouragement, or negative criticism?

does negative criticism make us passionate to improve?


personally, i have a few friends that frequently make jokes about my lack of skills, i am used as a joke example of a typical bad pianist.

i virtually never get any positive feedback(dont have a teacher anyway), and although i thought the negativity would inspire me to work hard and prove people wrong, it has ruined what confidence i once had and i feel uninspired and just depressed about my playing.

i wonder what positive feedback feels like...

anyway, thats my experience, does negative stuff actually work? or what...hmm, mild sheesh kebab

[gorbee natcase]

I would have to say possitive, I think that goes with out saying, although constructive critisizm is a sweet necessary evil but negative comments are more destructive than constructive. My thoughts anyway

[pianolearner]

I would have to say possitive, I think that goes with out saying, although constructive critisizm is a sweet necessary evil but negative comments are more destructive than constructive. My thoughts anyway

Absolutely agree.

[danyal]

Anything taken to the extreme is not good. Too much negative can bring a person down completely and too much positive can bloat ones head, to the point of being delusional. A bit like Idols I suppose... where 90% of the people that audition are just hopeful wannabe's who have been falsely told their entire lives that they sing like angels, when realistically they cant really tell A from F.

I belive in constructive crit. Where, if for example, my teacher tells me I play something badly, I expect him to tell me how I can improve. This way, even if I am a little down after my lesson, I still see hope for my playing from his advice... and it always feels good to come back the next week after working on the section in question and being told I play it well. (he's not someone who will give unnecessary compliments, so when he does, you know you really do play well!)

Maybe you should find a teacher. Because sometimes when you practise, you dont hear things that need to be done, that others, listening, would. (even the best of them need it sometimes!)
An alternative is, record yourself, and be your own worst critic. It helps too.

Anyway, dont be down. You can probably do things that your friends could only dream of!
Its about the music... after all. Remember that. Its all that matters.

[g_s_223]

Criticisms from "friends" like that are irrelevant.

You need objective and non-emotive analysis of your technical problems, and this should really come from a teacher. Given this analysis, the teacher then proposes informed and relevant solutions to the problems. You will then go away and practice the solutions. Then return to step 1.

Any issues with that? 

[leahcim]

i virtually never get any positive feedback(dont have a teacher anyway), and although i thought the negativity would inspire me to work hard and prove people wrong, it has ruined what confidence i once had and i feel uninspired and just depressed about my playing.

There's always the audition room.

I dunno about mates though, they tend to take mickey, I dunno that it's worth thinking about.

But, I would have expected you to be superb at playing [and I would have expected to concur with the choice of pieces you chose to play] - maybe one of the best posting here.

That's what my expectations would be prior to listening - based on your posts about what pianists you like, what you don't like, and your comments on other performances.

Perhaps I'm completely wrong to reach that conclusion, but if others do, that's a much tougher audience.

[zheer]

Positive comments, however i am my worst critic.

[m1469]

I would have to say it is not necessarily a matter of positive or negative for me.  Sometimes both have inspired me, sometimes both have angered me.  What it comes down to is comments which reflect somebody's honest listening to whatever it is I have offered.  Also, it can depend on the situation, the person giving the comment, and the way it is constructed and delivered as well.

I used to have one teacher who would emotionally strip me naked.  I also witnessed other students in master classes having a similar experience with this person.  This teacher would literally yell and be in my face.  But, I also had the opportunity to get to know him a little more as a person and realized more what his intent was behind his approach to teaching.  I realized that this is just the way that he taught (in other words, no matter how personal it seemed, it wasn't), and the more mean he seemed, the more he believed in the student.  Knowing the intention can change everything.

In short, I guess it depends.  Generally though, if I know somebody's really going to listen (and hear) and care about what I do, I will want to do my best and be nice and practised up.


m1469 

[lisztisforkids]

Positive comments, however i am my worst critic.

Indeed.

[pianistimo]

agreed most with danyalswan (and basically everyone else, too).  as you mature, people just think you can 'take it,' when in actual fact you may be like me and have actual tears in your eyes an hour later (i never give teachers or anyone else the satisfaction of seeing me cry).  booohoooohoooo.  then, somehow, i feel much better.  it's like, you're on another level - realizing that once that one is out of the way - no one can say anything worse...especially if you work on that one particular thing in your technique. 

i think it's absolutely hilarious now - if a teacher tells you to keep metronomic speeds even and then says something about not having feeling.  that's like going into the hospital and being asked about the pain level 1-10.  i mean, what if you are having 100 but cannot express the level because they haven't given you the tools to explain yourself.

how about this one? teacher:  "has anyone ever told you you were a good pianist?"  student:  "hmmm.  well, usually people that don't play the piano."  hahahahah  actually this is quite true for the above-average and maybe even excelling student.  people don't say positive things because they think your head will swell with excitement - when all you really need is encouragement of any small word like 'good' or 'that's right.' 

now, as i see it - if you are a hard-core teacher and enjoy employing torturous methods on your students - you should let them know after 2-3 years some good things.  for a quick fix - play in the mall, for restaurants, for church, for choirs, for friends - and you'll hear lots of good stuff.  it might not help your playing, though.  i'd rather hear lots of criticism and cry later i guess.

[aryantes]

I guess it just depends on what drives you.

I've only been taking lessons for a few months now but I have had a lot of good comments from my teacher.

Not so much compliments but things like "You know, you could make up many years of practice in a short amount of time and I think you will be flying around the piano in no time."  and "If you started when you were really young, you'd be amazingly good right now."   ( I am 23 )

It is like a glint of the future that really drives me. I'm still a beginner though.

Funny, I was actually talking to one of my cousins about this. My teacher does not give me much negative criticism and negativity is something that I want actually.

If I feel like I am failing, I will be very discouraged but I will work harder than ever. If I feel like I'm doing a real good job... I end up slacking a little bit.

Me, I need to be challenged, I need to be pushed to my limit and need to feel the pressure.

But if I had to choose one or the other, I'd choose the positive. The feeling of being able to push beyond your capabilities is more amazing than the feeling of being able to reach someone's expectations.

[rc]

I would have to say it is not necessarily a matter of positive or negative for me.  Sometimes both have inspired me, sometimes both have angered me.  What it comes down to is comments which reflect somebody's honest listening to whatever it is I have offered.  Also, it can depend on the situation, the person giving the comment, and the way it is constructed and delivered as well.

I used to have one teacher who would emotionally strip me naked.  I also witnessed other students in master classes having a similar experience with this person.  This teacher would literally yell and be in my face.  But, I also had the opportunity to get to know him a little more as a person and realized more what his intent was behind his approach to teaching.  I realized that this is just the way that he taught (in other words, no matter how personal it seemed, it wasn't), and the more mean he seemed, the more he believed in the student.  Knowing the intention can change everything.

In short, I guess it depends.  Generally though, if I know somebody's really going to listen (and hear) and care about what I do, I will want to do my best and be nice and practised up.


m1469 

That's a good point about honesty, because any kind of dishonest feedback is just useless, not true. Whether they're being nice and saying your bad playing was good, or they're being jerks saying your playing was no good, just because they're jerks.

Another thing about the more hardassed teachers who won't hesitate to strike nerves - when someone who is scarce with their positive comments gives one, it means much more, you've really earned it. This kind of teacher can be very good if the student can weather it.

I consider constructive criticism to be positive, in the sense that it'll inspire me to work harder. Positive comments energize me, it tells me that all the practice wasn't in vain, encourages me to keep working.

The occassional negative comment can be twisted around for your advantage, "that goof doesn't know what he's saying, I'll work hard and in due time will show how good I am"... But if you're hearing that sort of thing all the time, you start wondering if it might be true. On the topic of highschool students calling everything gay; I remember one kid who was ALWAYS called gay by nearly everyone, I swear it turned the guy gay. If my friends had made a joke of me, I would carry some massive resentment for the whole lot.

[g_s_223]

Hmm, following on from the "gay" points, I reckon there certainly is a bit of a sex/gender thing in there too. The male ego is a sensitive thing, as every woman knows...

For this reason,  it's probably a bit hard for a man to take negative criticism from another man. I (as a man) have found women teachers don't usually give me purely negative criticism, thankfully...

 

[thalbergmad]

When i was very young it was negative that would get me going. My old teacher worked out that all he had to say was "you are not good enough to play that" and i would practise harder than ever to prove him wrong.

I was a horrible child.

[gorbee natcase]

When i was very young it was negative that would get me going. My old teacher worked out that all he had to say was "you are not good enough to play that" and i would practise harder than ever to prove him wrong.

I was a horrible child.

Don't say that, I'm sure you were very nice

[prometheus]

When I saw the title I though this was referring to events in ones life. But it seems it is about criticism. Let me regard the latter first.

Personally negative critisism motivates me more, at least if it is fair and accurate or if I think it is. It just bothers me and I have to ask upon. But this depends on the source of your motivation. I don't do something because I have a natural talent for it. I do it because I want, because I love it, and/or because I just have to be able to do it.

As for events in onces life. I wouldn't make such a blank and white destinction. It is easy to  observe if critique is positive or negative. But for events in ones life, this is much harder. Or  , it is impossible. Negative events can have very large positive concequenses, and also the other way around. So it is hard to discuss this.

Personally I always felt it strange to label sadness as negative. Sadness can be just as colourful, meaningfull, important and impressive as happyness. In some cases one can give a lot of more constrast and depth to ones life than the other. If you haven't been really happy in your live, surely you are missing something. But if you haven't been very sad then you are also missing out something, I would almost say, something beautiful.

Maybe I am such a megalomanic that I can even find my own emotions beautiful.

[ted]

I always take notice of any comments, but always in a purely objective sense, never emotionally. I find it hard to get excited either way about anything that is said these days.

[rc]

As for events in onces life. I wouldn't make such a blank and white destinction. It is easy to  observe if critique is positive or negative. But for events in ones life, this is much harder. Or  , it is impossible. Negative events can have very large positive concequenses, and also the other way around. So it is hard to discuss this.

Personally I always felt it strange to label sadness as negative. Sadness can be just as colourful, meaningfull, important and impressive as happyness. In some cases one can give a lot of more constrast and depth to ones life than the other. If you haven't been really happy in your live, surely you are missing something. But if you haven't been very sad then you are also missing out something, I would almost say, something beautiful.

In life, your attitude is more important than any outside event, and it can be clear cut between a positive and negative attitude.

Sadness can be a powerful emotion. I would draw a line between a blue mood and depression though. Depression is no good, no color whatsoever. I have a hard time imagining that anyone could go through life without getting sad or depressed at some point.

[rimv2]

which inspires you to work more and harder?

positive comments and encouragement, or negative criticism?

does negative criticism make us passionate to improve?


personally, i have a few friends that frequently make jokes about my lack of skills, i am used as a joke example of a typical bad pianist.

i virtually never get any positive feedback(dont have a teacher anyway), and although i thought the negativity would inspire me to work hard and prove people wrong, it has ruined what confidence i once had and i feel uninspired and just depressed about my playing.

i wonder what positive feedback feels like...

anyway, thats my experience, does negative stuff actually work? or what...hmm, mild sheesh kebab

No one elses opinion on mah skilz mattahs but mine

Comment make no matter, however ah is always willing to try advice about technique and shistuff

[pianogeek_cz]

My experience is that I need both. Positive comments for encouragement - if I'm getting positive comments, I'll work more the way I did - and negative for revision - if I'm getting negative comments, I'm probably doing something wrong. What is it?

But generally speaking, positive comments are more motivating.

[meli]

I would definitely need to have both to inspire me to reach my goals. I actually have benefit from negative criticism from relatives and my teacher about my playing.  I would definitely work even harder and I feel a sense of accomplishment if she says I am finally 'good' at this. I still remember after learning an etude, my teacher would always tell me what I did wrong, nothing right. After a few months, during my playing she actually stopped me halfway and her eyes sparkled and said 'wow, that was good!' - that was the best feeling in the world.    I notice my other teacher who ALWAYS give positive comments, I actually am never satisfied with my playing, and become my worst critic.  I guess we all need abit of both. Too much of either isn't good. In general I prefer positive comments, but I need the negative criticism just as much or how would I know what I am doing wrong?

[sara81]

I don't know..maybe positive comments with few good advices.
That inspires me the most.

Although...when my professor tells that I played like s**t,I'm depressed for few hours,and then I start to practise like a nimpho on vacation