Conquering stage fright and stage dominance

[lisztisforkids]

I know this topic has been before but... How do you go about conquering stage fright and how long did it take you to feel comfortable in front of the audiance???

The other night I performed Chopin etude 25/12. My playing was rotten even though I the day before I played it nearly perfectly and dynamicly well enough to make me feel like I was flying. Its my goddam nerves...

Well on to my second statement.. My teacher told me that when you play you should make a strong presence on the stage. My teacher said I played well enough but where I really went wrong was my attitude before I played and after. Before I went on stage I acted like I was nervous, which the audiance immmediatley saw. And as I played I played with an air of weakness about me. And after the recital when people came to compliment me I told every single one of them about how bad I did.. My concience betrayed me...

I think that I learned more from this recital than probaly from all my other ones put together. (save one disaster)    When we play we should be confident and strong.
As Bob would say STRENGTH WITH HONOR!

[pianistimo]

i think all students should be required to be taking a 'master class' at the same time as lessons because there you learn to play regularly in front of a class.  it gets you in the habit of preparing your mind as the last person before you performs.  it's like a circus act in a way.  you go through at least the first phrases of the piece and set the piece in your head.  it's been a long time for me, in terms of performing without music, but when i used to - i practiced a lot the day before, too - and it seemed to help.  maybe with an etude - you have to be super warmed up.

[brsmpianist]

I have the same exact problem... offstage when im practicing or even in rep classes and such i play quite good, with lots of musicality and plenty of technique, then i go up on stage and do the weirdest things...
i have a recital coming up in thirteen days and this issue has been in my mind fr a while... im ready to turn to anything that would help, perhaps even a calming "drug", which i know many people here disaprove of, but i cant put into words how frustrating it is to have my pieces go so badly when ive worked really hard.  lisztisforkids, i sympathize 

[pianistimo]

what about playing for as many audiences as you can before your performance.  i think it's something that the mind can get used to - but it needs time and practice.  probably, the larger audiences are what is hardest to find, but even practicing in the hall you are going to play in must help.  (pretending it's filled - but having a few seats filled) 

i used to like a dose of calcium and potassium right before i played - so banana milkshakes made me feel really calm unlike coke (which i tried before a jury one time).  the coke machines were nearby - but it was just too much sugar for me and made my nerves worse.

[andhow04]

I know this topic has been before but... How do you go about conquering stage fright and how long did it take you to feel comfortable in front of the audiance???

The other night I performed Chopin etude 25/12. My playing was rotten even though I the day before I played it nearly perfectly and dynamicly well enough to make me feel like I was flying. Its my goddam nerves...

Well on to my second statement.. My teacher told me that when you play you should make a strong presence on the stage. My teacher said I played well enough but where I really went wrong was my attitude before I played and after. Before I went on stage I acted like I was nervous, which the audiance immmediatley saw. And as I played I played with an air of weakness about me. And after the recital when people came to compliment me I told every single one of them about how bad I did.. My concience betrayed me...

I think that I learned more from this recital than probaly from all my other ones put together. (save one disaster)    When we play we should be confident and strong.
As Bob would say STRENGTH WITH HONOR!

if ppl give compliments, it isn't dishonest to say, "thank you." and u don't have to say, "you're wrong." they liked SOMETHING about it!!! and it is indecent to accuse ppl of lying by saying, nope, i didn't. i just think, well, they want to say something good, so "thank you!"
my teacher used 2 tell me, when u go on stage, do everything 1 step slower than you would do normally. it really works. cos already u will try and do everthing too fast, and that right away is going to elad to mistakes, and playing thats not clear. so if u slow it down 1 step,i mean for th eperformance, then u are really playing how u would normally would.
any kind of presence can be strong, even those ppl who come out looking sheepish and embarassed. its not the outside appearance that defines presence, i promise u. becase anyone can have presence no matter how they act, its how u feel on the inside, definitely not how u look on the outside. what i mean is dont try and act someway on the outside just cos u think or ur teacher thinks, "thats presence." it has ntohing to do with the outside, and presence inside can look like anything, anything, anything outside. like strong, or like wise, or like sheepish, or like scared. and still it would be strong presence.

[m1469]

OH man, I am so frustrated !!   I have been doing quite a bit of work with this topic in the last year and a half and I have a whole bunch to say.  Unforunately, I can't seem to get it all out without writing an entire essay (or more) about it.   Either that, or I can only write fragmented thoughts out.  I will be back later (hopefully) but I just want to say a couple of things for now (fragemented thoughts).

• Yes, play for tons of people in various venues (even just in your living room or a practise room).
• Preparation is the key to satisfying performance.
• There is a difference between worrying about what people will be thinking about YOU, vs worrying about how people will be experiencing and thinking about the MUSIC.
• There are more important things to think about than worrying about what people will be thinking about.
• Not caring what people think is not the same thing as not caring about how the MUSIC is prepared, presented, and communicated.

Also, with regard to audience members coming up to congratulate you, one of my voice teachers taught me something very important along these lines :

When people come up to you after a performance to congratulate and compliment you, they are vulnerable.  The only answer should be "Thank you" (or some kind of acceptance of what they are offering) otherwise you take away from them what they have to give, and you step on them when they are open to you (and we do not want that from them while we are performing, do we ?).


I'll be back, perhaps.


m1469 

[rc]

if ppl give compliments, it isn't dishonest to say, "thank you." and u don't have to say, "you're wrong." they liked SOMETHING about it!!! and it is indecent to accuse ppl of lying by saying, nope, i didn't. i just think, well, they want to say something good, so "thank you!"
my teacher used 2 tell me, when u go on stage, do everything 1 step slower than you would do normally. it really works. cos already u will try and do everthing too fast, and that right away is going to elad to mistakes, and playing thats not clear. so if u slow it down 1 step,i mean for th eperformance, then u are really playing how u would normally would.
any kind of presence can be strong, even those ppl who come out looking sheepish and embarassed. its not the outside appearance that defines presence, i promise u. becase anyone can have presence no matter how they act, its how u feel on the inside, definitely not how u look on the outside. what i mean is dont try and act someway on the outside just cos u think or ur teacher thinks, "thats presence." it has ntohing to do with the outside, and presence inside can look like anything, anything, anything outside. like strong, or like wise, or like sheepish, or like scared. and still it would be strong presence.

Great post! A little tricky to read (no breaks, one big mass) but all great points. I read over it twice.

I read somewhere (this forum no doubt ) that we percieve time in relation to our heartbeat. So when you go up onstage nervous and freaking out on the inside, your heartrate increases and you percieve time to be moving faster than normal. So you play faster, more likely to make mistakes which make you even more nervous and it can quickly spiral out of control.

It's so important to have a solid 'inner game'. I think everybody get some nerves performing, it's not something that ever truely goes away. The difference is being able to keep it in control, and also to have some strategies to calm yourself if your mind does start to wack out on ya. This kind of skill is also very useful in social situations, essential actually.

I think what I do is to try and keep a balance between being focused on the music but not too much that I 'overintellectualize' the details and screw myself up. It's hard to put in words.

OH man, I am so frustrated !!   I have been doing quite a bit of work with this topic in the last year and a half and I have a whole bunch to say.  Unforunately, I can't seem to get it all out without writing an entire essay (or more) about it.   Either that, or I can only write fragmented thoughts out.  I will be back later (hopefully) but I just want to say a couple of things for now (fragemented thoughts).

• Yes, play for tons of people in various venues (even just in your living room or a practise room).
• Preparation is the key to satisfying performance.
• There is a difference between worrying about what people will be thinking about YOU, vs worrying about how people will be experiencing and thinking about the MUSIC.
• There are more important things to think about than worrying about what people will be thinking about.
• Not caring what people think is not the same thing as not caring about how the MUSIC is prepared, presented, and communicated.

Also, with regard to audience members coming up to congratulate you, one of my voice teachers taught me something very important along these lines :

When people come up to you after a performance to congratulate and compliment you, they are vulnerable.  The only answer should be "Thank you" (or some kind of acceptance of what they are offering) otherwise you take away from them what they have to give, and you step on them when they are open to you (and we do not want that from them while we are performing, do we ?).

Another great post! Agreed on all points, I especially liked the idea of vulnerability in compliments, never thought of it that way before.

On the idea of playing in all kinds of venues for experience, a good resource is the music store... It's not formal, you can go in at any time to test-drive new pianos. There's always a small audience of strangers of all kinds of backgrounds, and I'm not sure if it's just me but it seems to me that everyone who walks into a music store has an air of vulnerability, which along with being musicians makes them a perfect audience. You get to try all kinds of pianos, which is good for discovering what you like in an instrument and also to make you adaptable to different instruments.

I sometimes think I'm being a bit misleading in trying out pianos for the ulterior motive of performance experience, but then I remember the salesman is happy to infect me with the touch and sound of an excellent instrument that I can't afford (for the moment ). So it's all cool.

A very good resource indeed. You'll have to put yourself in that position in order to learn to handle your nerves, so even if you have to force yourself to begin with, ya might as well. I consider it just another form of practice.


...

Another thought on the idea of preparation. I've read about studies on behavior, and how we behave differently in the presence of others. You'll do a better job of something you're good at, or worse if you aren't good at it, in the presence of others. Here it is, social facilitation: https://allpsych.com/psychology101/groups.html. Be well prepared!

Paradoxically, it's also useful to practice playing not so well prepared, to become comfortable with making mistakes and learn how to keep the music moving through mistakes. Which is a way of sort of hiding the mistakes.

[m1469]

Paradoxically, it's also useful to practice playing not so well prepared, to become comfortable with making mistakes and learn how to keep the music moving through mistakes. Which is a way of sort of hiding the mistakes.

Actually, I agree and would say that this still falls under some kind of performance preparation on a larger scale.   Funnily enough, I would say that my last year and a half has definitely included this line of preparation  . 

Also, I have given myself permission to play with the score on several occasions (and not feel too guilty about it) just to let myself be alleviated of certain worries and establish a different kind of attitude before and during a performance (aiming to have some things carry over into off-book performances).  My emphasis has been on positive experiences to help in building a more solid performing platform.

But, I am feeling ready to move into a dfferent phase now... yeah for piano adventure ! 

[arensky]

if ppl give compliments, it isn't dishonest to say, "thank you." and u don't have to say, "you're wrong." they liked SOMETHING about it!!! and it is indecent to accuse ppl of lying by saying, nope, i didn't. i just think, well, they want to say something good, so "thank you!"

Yes.

my teacher used 2 tell me, when u go on stage, do everything 1 step slower than you would do normally. it really works. cos already u will try and do everthing too fast, and that right away is going to elad to mistakes, and playing thats not clear. so if u slow it down 1 step,i mean for th eperformance, then u are really playing how u would normally would.

Yes.

any kind of presence can be strong, even those ppl who come out looking sheepish and embarassed. its not the outside appearance that defines presence, i promise u. becase anyone can have presence no matter how they act, its how u feel on the inside, definitely not how u look on the outside. what i mean is dont try and act someway on the outside just cos u think or ur teacher thinks, "thats presence." it has ntohing to do with the outside, and presence inside can look like anything, anything, anything outside. like strong, or like wise, or like sheepish, or like scared. and still it would be strong presence.

No. WEIRD presence can be very strong (Gould, Lang Lang, Jarett and to a lesser extent Horowitz and Michelangeli) but if you are not reallly great than you will merely be considered a weirdo! SHY (Argerich, Haesun Paik) can work, but better for women than men. Women can be unassuming on stage and get away with that because (unfortunately) that is part of society's expectation of them. Sheepish is bad. If you are going to play well, why would you be sheepish? It sends THE WRONG SIGNAL to the audience, who we want to be on our side. Sure you can act sheepish and then play well, but that doesn't make any sense.

STRONG. This is good, as long as it isn't arrogant. I went through a phase about 20 years ago of being really pumped up and wanting to look commanding and strong. This is when I was going to big competitions and establishing myself in the big city. Fortunately I had friends and colleaugues who told me "what's with you? You look really arrogant onstage, it's not attractive!" I was surprised; I was merely trying to radiate self confidence; don't know what I was like before this phase but from the few photos of me from before this period I look pretty normal. I guess what I was trying to do was pump up something that was already fine, and so it came out fake, because I was TRYING to make an impression instead of just being myself. And also, why do you need to ACT strong if you ARE? I know a pianist in his early 20's, he acts like a storm trooper when he walks out; he does not understand how this works against him, particularly when he has huge memory lapses and technical gaffes; a shame, because most of his instincts are correct but he feels needs that bluster because he is insecure.

Confusing topic with many tangents; bottom line, if you are strong, there is nothing you need to do. If you are weak or feeling that way, just smile, and don't let them see it. Because if you act weak, they will think you are weak, and you've already put yourself at a disadvantage. Think of how simple the walking onstage bit is for us, as opposed to other artists. You walk out, smile, bow, sit down, do your thing, stand up, and no matter how bad it was, smile again and walk off. The smile is the most important, it doesn't have to be a Jimmy Carter (false and insincere anyway) , but your expression must be pleasant. No one likes a storm trooper, and nobody wants to see an insecure frightened nervous drip. Just smile, and they will be on your side. There is an element of acting here. When you are onstage, you are not important. You are merely a transmitter of the music. To be arrogant or insecure in front of an audience is to detract from the music, and that is the reason that anyone, performers or audience, is there at all.

 Andre Watts said in an interview years ago, talking about stage nerves, " when I walk onstage, I find myself saying "hello" under my breath." This has helped me to feel comfortable onstage, and sometimes I am VERY nervous. Sometimes I am not. But how I feel is not important, unless the feelings will interfere with my playing. And so I smile and say "hello" under my breath, and reflect on how wonderful it is that all these people are there to hear insignificant me bring great tone art to life. Interesting paradox, I never realized this; I use my humility to pump up my ego...FAR OUT, MAN... It helps. If I am lying to myself, if it will help me be comfortable and therefore play better and the people will like me (approval is important, don't tell yourself it's not), then it is fine. Because the bottom line is playing well, and all that that entails, playing well AND connecting with the people. You can drop half the notes on the floor an let them wiggle and writhe and die there, but if you COMMUNICATE with the audience then it does not matter, really. Sometimes this game of self deception is not nessacary, but I always say "hello" under my breath when I walk out. Because the audience are my FRIENDS. I like them.