Most hilarious thing a student has said

[ajspiano]

Not that this is particularly funny -

but I started a 4 yr old last week, aside from me just getting to know him and covertly assessing what basic skills he knew already (and how well) such as counting, alphabet, pitch, left/right, sense of timing etc. , in first lesson we covered how the keyboard is set out in order to get to finding "D"

Yesterday he came back for lesson 2, I was a little unsure how he'd be as he was fairly shy the first day, and I had a sense that his mum had decided he should get lessons rather than him actually showing an interest. But yesterday he came into my little studio with a big smile and very proudly anounced "this one is D" and played numerous D's on my piano.. and after a short time playing some alphabet games on the floor was able to begin telling me what the other white keys are on his own.

Win.

[virtuoso80]

Not a student, but a younger brother of a student:

   I walk into the house on my way to the piano room, and as I pass by this 5-or-so kid, he suddenly blurts out, "I SEE YOUR BOO-TAY!", and then proceeds to smack me right on the ass.

[iplaychopsticks]

For some reason when this scenario happened, I had to fight to not burst out laughing.

Shes an adorable three years old.

I asked, "Emily!  Are you ready to play piano." 
She said, "Yup!"  Put her hands on the piano
We counted together in preparation,
then right when the downbeat happened,
She suddenly turned to me and said, "Look! my shoes are pink."
At least she was in rhythm!

[rachmaninoff_forever]

I was watching Jorge Bolets masterclass on the Rach 3 the other day, and he asked one of his students which version of a scale sounds better, or something like that.

The student didn't know what he was talking about, so the conversation goes somethng like this.

Bolet:  what sounds better, this?  Or this?

Student:  yeah

Bolet:  this? Or this?

Student: yeah, uh huh, I think I get it now!

Bolet:  okay that's the end of the lesson!

what the heck?!  At first I was so confused!  Then while they were clapping he realized what Bolet was asking him!  He felt soo salty!!!

[asuhayda]

My 8 yr old student came in a couple of weeks ago looking sad...

Me: "What's wrong?"
My Student:  "My mom made me run on the treadmill because she says I'm getting too fat... I brought you some cookies!!"

[tixylix]

I was working out of a method book with an 8y/o; one of the exercises in the book had him spelling little words with the notes written above (words like 'cab' 'bad' etc...). 
Well, we came to what was supposed to be 'fad' and he etched out 'fag'.  I think if he had just stopped there I would have just etched it out and tried to pretend nothing happened, but then he turns to me and asks very politely "what's a fag?".  I'm just thankful his mom hadn't stayed for that lesson.

In the UK a fag is a cigarette, a word used so commonly people rarely actually refer to them as cigarettes. I remember an American friend of mine being extremely confused when I was chatting to them on MSN and said I needed to nip outside for a fag...

[asuhayda]

Had a lesson with a student last week:

Me: "What is the direction of this phrase?"
My Student: "Left to Right.."

HAAAHAHAHAHA!!! ... I wanted to kill him 

[sclive]

I asked a student if she knew what an "accidental" was, and she said, "When you make a mistake?"

[chopin2015]

"f shark"

[rachmaninoff_forever]

I asked a student if she knew what an "accidental" was, and she said, "When you make a mistake?"

That's what I said in my music theory class!!

Teacher:  yeah so...  blah blah blah...  accidental, blah blah blah...  accidental this, accidental that, accidental.

Class: ... ... ...

Teacher:  Yeah so you do...  Wait, just to make sure, everyone knows what's an accidental right?

Me:  When you make a mistake?