Hi, Walter

. I want to thank you for your thoughtful post and your questions. Let me see if I can adequetly answer them, and I will start with a different order than what you presented, because I feel it sets up nicer that way.
It seems you are wary of influence, because previously in the post you talked about your struggle to escape from teachers with strong opinions.
There are two perspectives for me to consider here. One, as a student myself, and the other, as a teacher.
As a student, I find myself developing into an "understanding" where I view the entire world as my teacher, in a fairly discernable and tangible way (this can depend on my own fear factors as well). My main aim as this student, at this point in my life, is to observe, experiment, and gather information. There are certain fields that interest me more than others, however I am currently of the mind to consider all matters, and I am currently in a state of gleaning from what all of the greatest thinkers and doers have accomplished and discovered thus far in life. I am giving myself a time-frame of about 20 more years for this type of student-life.
My impressions of the world and of humanity, or of life in general, thus far, are that there are many corners that are still unexplored and many aspects of living that seem like complete mysteries. Mixed in with that, there are times when humanity, and certain individuals, believes we have found concrete answers (and perhaps we have to some degree). However, further study, deeper digging, and more growth inevitably shows us that what we once thought was concrete, is not actually what it once seemed. This is a pattern that I have noticed about the overall progress of humanity.
Because of this observation, I find myself very wary of banking my entire existence, or for that matter, the entire existence of even certain elements of my life, on what one person says. I would probably be more willing if I observed more congruity among individuals, but, that congruity is just not there. Exact examples have comically shewn themselves to me throughout my own pianistic study (along with other areas of life).
Though my musical study did not begin in all the ways I used to wish it had, I now consider myself to have been quite blessed in the opportunities I have had, and in the teachers I have come across. Through this time, my observing, experimenting, and collecting of informations carried on as usual. It didn't take long for me to realize that there were big discrepencies within this particular field (along with pretty much any other field), as I learned that various editions of the same printed music were different from one another, one revered artist would play the same piece as another but with a completely different impression and with different thoughts on articulation and phrasing. Thoughts on what is proper performacne practice for certain styles, like Bach's music, for example, vary far and wide. Even physical approaches to the piano vary to some degree, some making much more sense to me than others. If they are all masters, and if they are all revered, who is right ?
There were two main points where I crossed over a line and took a real action toward needing to discover my own idea of interpretation, vs taking a mere spoonfeeding from my teachers (though many experiences helped me build up to crossing this line). One time was when I was preparing a Scarlatti sonata for a masterclass. At that time, I was studying with a teacher whom I did not feel generally inspired to find my own thoughts on interpretation with, and that was a newer experience for me. For three years before that, I had studied under different circumstances and during those three years, I often lived in a state of the deepest considerations I could manage, to find myself within a piece of music.
As I prepared this Scarlatti, I felt that I just wasn't getting some of it. And, that meant that it wasn't fitting in me physically, either. So, I decided to go back to my old ways and I took a dive into the ethers with this piece. I came to some conclusions that I valued, and it was physically working better, too, and took it to my next lesson where each of my ideas were changed, one by one. That was fine. I had lost nothing, really, except the desire to ever think deeply and then bring my ideas to this teacher again (this, after it being the second concrete experience like this with this particular individual).
When I showed up to the masterclass, I performed as my teacher had asked. As I sat there, however, the "master" began to change things once again. However, what we changed to were many of the things and along the same line of reasoning that I had come up with in my own searchings (and if what my teacher had come up with was "right," why was it now being changed again? ). Was he more right than my teacher ? I don't know. But, for me and on a personal level, that whole experience was a bigger lesson in interpretation than either one of them could have offered me individually.
Another example was a time when I was involved in a weeklong piano camp. During this time I brought the same piece to a teacher in private, and then to a masterclass with a different teacher the very next day. What the teacher had asked me to do in private, I did in masterclass, only to have the master tell me to do exactly the opposite.
For awhile, the circumstances were so strange to me, that I thought teachers were conspiring together in order to convince me of the lessons I felt I was actually getting out of these experiecnes (and that wasn't too good for my psyche either, btw), but whatever the event, the lesson was very clear that I needed to consider other's ideas, but it was time for me to start thinking for myself and decide how I am going to use the informations I have been given.
If there is anything that is hard-gained experience about where I am at with my music (or in life), or processies that I have painstankingly undergone, it is to have learned that there are common practices, some contradictory to others, some more favorable than others, but that after considering what has already been said and done, I must finally, in the end, think for myself and make my own decisions. My Uni teacher pushed me so far in this direction that it truly was *extremely* painstaking; full of an "artist's" agony, full of tears, full of prayer, full of soul-searching, full of defeats and triumphs ... but the key word through it all is --
full.
As a teacher, I am not wary of influence. Actually, it's quite the contrary. I aim to be one of the most, if not
thee most, influential figures in my students lives as musicians, and as individuals. But, my influence is aimed at getting them seeking, thinking, and discovering from their own deepest parts and to become more aware of how their decisions affect their work and their life -- this is a *vital* life-skill. My aim is to give them tools to help them get through that particular territory, too. So, if I see them doing this and accomplishing this and drawing thier own thoughtful conclusions, I would never dream of taking it away from them over a particular piece of music. Because, the tool and the attitude is what I want them to grow in, and that needs special care, nurturing, attention, and support.
As far as being influenced as a
student, I am confident in my abilities to listen, consider, and understand where another is coming from. I take a person's offering of thoughts and ideas very seriously, and I make a great effort to mentally walk in their shoes for awhile so I can try to grasp the fuller picture of what they are telling me. But, the most influential aspects of anybody's teaching with me, are those times when something they say or do just resonates with me (and this can cause an instant change in me), or when my time with them has encouraged growth for me (and hopefully for them, too). I want to be most influenced by the
validity of what they do and say, I want to be
convinced, and what inevitably convinces me is my own thinking through of it, my own experimenting, my own gathering of informations (however, there are
some things in life, including in music, that I do just believe when somebody says/does it).
hee hee... I am tired

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m1469