A student (we'll call her Sarah) of mine who is very shy and in her first year of lessons told me she did not want to play keyboard in my recital. I am preparing an ensemble recital and encorporating rhythm instruments, so I told her she could do a percussion instrument if she wanted. I told her mother about the times for ensemble practice, and even wrote in her book "For percussion instrument." Yesterday was our 2nd ensemble practice, and this student's dad flipped out when he saw that she had chosen the triangle to play in the recital.
Quick background: I teach private lessons to my private students, and I teach piano and general music at a daycare. I only use the percussion instruments at the daycare since many of my students are 5 and under, and we do ear training, etc. Sarah is one of the older students at the daycare, which makes her only 8. She's had less than a year of lessons, and can barely play hands together, so giving her a solo piece is out of the question (for this particular concert) and either way, she chose not to play, I never force students to do recital.
Continuing on, this girl's father made her cry in front of about 12 students and their parents, then tried to get angry with me about his daughter not being on the keyboard. Keep in mind, there was absolutely no effort made beforehand to contact me and ask me about what Sarah would be playing for the recital. He simply didn't care, then when he saw that Sarah had chosen to do something easy he had a temper tantrum. I told him to leave and he could discuss it with me when I'm not in the middle of a class, in front of so many people. I explained to him the concept of learning rhythm with instruments as well as piano, and learning music as a language which can be translated over any instrument. I also offered to put Sarah in my showcase recital (which I don't usually include the daycare children, because of their age, and because I have only been at the daycare for a year and a half) but it there is a $20 for that recital. He then yelled "I DON'T WANT ANY RECITAL!! I DON'T WANT A TRIANGLE LESSON!! JUST TEACH HER REGULAR PIANO!!" and I asked him if he'd ever even taken a piano lesson (since the concept of rhythm meant nothing to him) and he replied "No." So I explained my method and told him if he didn't like it, piano is optional, and he doesn't have to put Sarah in lessons with me. There are plenty of piano teachers, and he should look elsewhere. (There is no way I would recommend any teachers, because noone deserves to be subjected to that kind of harassment.) He then began screaming, so I just hung up on him.
He called back about 30 minutes later when I was in a lesson, and I answered just because I didn't want any nasty messages. He told me he was going to have me fired from the daycare, to which I responded "I don't work for the daycare, I am a self employed contract worker. You can't have me fired."
So far that is all that's happened. This is my 8th year teaching, and I have NEVER been acosted like that by a parent. I know I have the right to choose my clients, but even though I quit teaching this guy's daughter, I will still probably see him at the daycare. Luckily they only take kids up to 8 years old, so she won't be going there much longer, but I still think I should call the girl's mother and discuss this with her.
Has anyone else ever been screamed at or cussed out by a parent? I don't know what to do about this whole thing. The worst part is that the only real victim here is Sarah. She is so shy and quiet, and she has a really bad attitude, but every once in a while, she'll come out of her shell and she's such a smart and creative girl. I wish I could help her
Topic: Eratic Parents