Adam and Eve - did they have a belly button?

[ahinton]

Have you ever seen one of hers that did?

Thal

Yes, I have, but that one (and plenty others) ain't one of 'em.

Best,

Alistair

[thalbergmad]

Splendid, do you think you could find one for me and post a link?

Ta

Thal

[ahinton]

Splendid, do you think you could find one for me and post a link?

Ta

Thal

Don't mean to be either rude or unhelpful, Thal, but I am rather busy and wonder if you couldn't find one yourself (after all, there's only just over 10,000 from which to make your selection) and, in any case, if you are already convinced in advance that this needle in a haystack doesn't actually exist, no attempt on my part to persuade you otherwise islikely to have much positive effect, I imagine.

Actually, speaking of needles in haystacks, you may like to know (if you don't already) of a wonderful reference in the work of Norman Douglas which I'm sure Susan would especially appreciate and which is to the notion of immense scarcity as expressed with the words "a needle in a haystack or a joke in the Bible"...

Best,

Alistair

[pianistimo]

balaams ass was a joke.  (excuse the term for donkey).  and, perhaps God was playing a joke with Himself - sparing others the humble birth - and was born from a virgin (which must have been a somewhat humbling thing for his mother to explain to joseph).  he was probably called a 'you know what' - even though He was God incarnate. 

there are actually many jokes in the bible - but the biggest jokes are usually on the unsuspecting.  Goliath being downed by a small boy with a slingshot.  things like that.  i believe haman is the butt of jokes at 'purim.' 

all i was saying is that since adam and eve were adults when created - what would stop God from making a tree with rings - or geological strata that looks older than it is?  nothing.  He's God. 

[ahinton]

balaams ass was a joke.  (excuse the term for donkey).  and, perhaps God was playing a joke with Himself - sparing others the humble birth - and was born from a virgin (which must have been a somewhat humbling thing for his mother to explain to joseph).  he was probably called a 'you know what' - even though He was God incarnate.

Well, nothing that you write in this paragraph gives me the slightest idea about the joke/s involved here - and I don't think that this is due to any particular shortcomings in my sense of humour...

there are actually many jokes in the bible - but the biggest jokes are usually on the unsuspecting.  Goliath being downed by a small boy with a slingshot.  things like that.

That was a joke, was it? OK...

all i was saying is that since adam and eve were adults when created

Er - excuse me? That's as implausible (or maybe even more so) than the alleged virgin birth of Christ, surely? How old were you when you were born, by the way (just curious!...)

- what would stop God from making a tree with rings - or geological strata that looks older than it is?  nothing.  He's God. 

Since you ask - sheer common sense, one would hope...

Best,

Alistair

[thalbergmad]

Goliath being downed by a small boy with a slingshot. 

HAHAHAHA, i nearly died laughing after reading that joke.

Are there any more rib ticklers from the Holy Book?

Thanks

Thal

[mcgillcomposer]

This discussion is futile...you can't argue with ideology.

...just try arguing with Chomsky... 

[thalbergmad]

there are actually many jokes in the bible

Yeh, that is true. I think this one was in the same book as the story of Jonah:

There is this atheist swimming in the ocean. All of the sudden he sees this shark in the water, so he starts swimming towards his boat.

As he looks back he sees the shark turn and head towards him. His boat is a ways off and he starts swimming like crazy. He's scared to death, and as he turns to see the jaws of the great white beast open revealing its teeth in a horrific splendor, the atheist screams, "Oh God! Save me!"

In an instant time is frozen and a bright light shines down from above. The man is motionless in the water when he hears the voice of God say, "You are an atheist. Why do you call upon me when you do not believe in me?"

Aghast with confusion and knowing he can't lie the man replies, "Well, that's true I don't believe in you, but how about the shark? Can you make the shark believe in you?"

The Lord replies, "As you wish," and the light retracted back into the heavens and the man could feel the water begin to move once again.

As the atheist looks back he can see the jaws of the shark start to close down on him, when all of sudden the shark stops and pulls back.

Shocked, the man looks at the shark as the huge beast closes its eyes and bows its head and says, "Thank you Lord for this food for which I am about to receive..."

The Bible has some of the best funnies ever.

Thal

[mcgillcomposer]

I wonder is God is any good at knock knock jokes...

[pianistimo]

i like that one actually, thal.  did you just make that up?  i have to give you credit for making it funnier than just reading the story.  but, what about the part where the giant fish spits him out on dry land.  and you think the story is over - and then you read more -something about a fig tree grow up - gives jonah shade and then suddenly withers and dies.  the story just keeps on going.  you have to give God very much credit for his stick-to-it'vness with jonah.  i mean, the guy was a total loser when it comes to merciful missionariing.  God had to keep giving him these little nudges. 

[thalbergmad]

i like that one actually, thal.  did you just make that up?   

No, it was from the book of judges.

Thal

[pianistimo]

i thought that's where the knock knock jokes were.  judges have gavels and so the joke would go:  knock, knock.  who's there?  judges.  judges who?  judges.  you know - the book in the bible. ahahahahahahahah

[mcgillcomposer]

Some clean Bible humour...ironic...

If the Bible Was Written By College Students...

Top Ten Ways the Bible would be different if it were written by college students.

10. Last Supper would have been eaten the next morning cold.

9. The Ten Commandments are actually only five, double-spaced, and written in a large font.

8. New edition every two years in order to limit reselling.

7. Forbidden fruit would have been eaten because it wasn't cafeteria.

6. Paul's letter to the Romans becomes Paul's e-mail to abuse@romans.gov.

5. Reason Cain killed Abel: They were roommates.

4. The place where the end of the world occurs: Finals, not Armageddon.

3. Out go the mules, in come the mountain bikes.

2. Reason why Moses and followers walked in desert for 40 years: They didn't want to ask directions and look like freshmen.

1. Instead of God creating the world in six days and resting on the seventh, He would have put it off until the night before it was due and then pulled an all-nighter.

[thalbergmad]

i thought that's where the knock knock jokes were.  judges have gavels and so the joke would go:  knock, knock.  who's there?  judges.  judges who?  judges.  you know - the book in the bible. ahahahahahahahah

Change the pills woman:

Who was born in a barn and loved by millions?






























































































Red Rum

[pianistimo]

red rum is not in the bible, thal. 

i liked those jokes, mcgill - i suppose you and thal could have a competition.  i never was good at telling jokes.  i have to think about the details and lose the story.

[ahinton]

I, too, quite enjoyed "mcgillcomposer"'s contributions here but, that said, I do rather wish that I'd not mentioned jokes in the Bible now, since this seems to have spawned a whole new byway that is not directly connected with the thread topic - mind you, a 165-post thread about whether or not Adam and Eve had belly buttons is arguably as much in need of digressions at all costs as anything else...

Can we now simply accept that Adam and Eve were either (a) human beings designed the same way as other human beings or (b) mere figments of their creator's (i.e. writer's) imagination and kill this thread off?

Best,

Alistair

[jlh]

Or (c) they were human beings designed differently than other human beings.

 

[saturn_pianist]

What, science proves he is not required.

bffffffft!! science!!! u need God in every step u take!!
everyone needs God!!

[thalbergmad]

Oh no, we have got another one.

Thal

[mcgillcomposer]

u need God in every step u take!!

And every move you make...he'll be watching you...

* insert music note

[mike_lang]

And every move you make...he'll be watching you...

* insert music note

** and jazz hands