Parents who make themselves at home in your home

[luv2teach]

i have a set of parents who like to make themselves at home while they are waiting for their child's lessons.  the student is a transfer student from another teacher.  the previous teacher was a personal friend of theirs so they were comfortable making themselves at home there during lessons.  the previous teacher was even fine with the child wandering up to her bedrooms of her house!   i teach in a small apartment where it's an open layout.  they wander around and peek in my kitchen, help themselves by borrowing pens, tape, calculators etc that they see lying around and instead of sitting in the waiting area, they sometimes sit at my kitchen table.  this sets an example that their kids can also do the same thing.  Not only that, the kids occasionally come to the lesson thirsty and ask me to give them a drink and the parents don't say anything.  I don't feel comfortable teaching the parents manners.  any advice?

[term]

why should you not? Just to avoid an unconfortable subject?
Do it. Whose house is it?
If not, make a rule and put up a sign or something similar that requests all guests to stay at the waiting area. No big deal. But expect them to ask questions. So better be straightforward and tell them what you think.

[ramseytheii]

Give an inch and they will take a mile!  Kick these people out of your private spaces and don't let them ask any questions.  The way it is, is the way it is.

Walter Ramsey

[lazlo]

Well, I agree that its definetely inappropriate for them to wander around your house and peek around, but as far as water... I don't think that's an unreasonable request occassionally (I'm a student by the way). Lay down the law though.

[lau]

my teacher is the one who asks for the water. especially during the summer, it's like every lesson.

[quantum]

I have an item in my studio policy that says parents are to wait in the designated waiting area.  If they are found wandering in the private areas of my home it is grounds for termination from my studio. 

[a-sharp]

Have you tried putting things away [like out of sight completely], closing any doors, hanging curtains to close off areas [where you don't have doors]?

That's what I've done ... I also leave a pitcher of filtered water and some small disposable cups on the coffee table - and [because it's Christmas ], some candies in a little dish. so far - I've not had any problems....

Course - it's hard to go backwards once you've set a precedent, but you could try it... then simply put something in your policy about where people should wait [quietly] during lessons etc... I usually pass out a new copy of my policy at the beg.  of each year... some teachers pass out the new policy at the end of the previous year - then simply state "here's an updated policy for next year" blah blah blah - you get the idea.

If that still doesn't work you might have to say something ... "Hi... I'm sorry - but, would you be perhaps amenable to dropping Susie off for her lessons instead of waiting for her during her lesson? I have a feeling that she is easily distracted and would like to try a few lessons that way to see if we can't be more productive. Would this be OK with you to try out for a while? Thank you so much! *big grin* (you know - over the top with politeness - that *usually* works. if it doesn't - get rid of 'em!)

Good luck! Lot sof people have no clue how to act. We have to train them in subtle tactful ways. 

[dan101]

As mentioned, your going to have to lay down the law. Provide reading materials if parents wish to stay for the lesson. Otherwise, tell them to pick up their child after the lesson is over. Good luck.

[joyfulmusic]

In my experience it is just a matter of time before you will throw them out completely.  Rudeness and ignorance don't just go away.  This is the very reason I prefer to go to the student's home for lessons.  I charge more, save the family some time and I am in control of the beginning and end of it.  I live in the country and have a great little cottage on a lake.  People ooh and ah and ask if their kids can stay and play!