Quitting the piano

[aewanko]

My mind is playing tricks with me again! I can't decide!

[jlh]

Well Happy Birthday!

Seems your mind is already made up... you shouldn't quit the piano if it means something to you to play.  I hate to say it, but it really is something that only you have the ability to decide, and your decision must be based on what you get out of playing the piano.  So in reality, are you asking us to verbalize what you are getting out of playing the piano?

[dana_minmin]

Happy birthday aewanko

I have never had a reasonably good piano since I learnt it many years ago. I was happy when I fired my teacher 11 years ago and not touched a single key for years. Then I started to admire one of my friend who was playing Chopin nocturne really well, and at the same time I listened to some pieces and thought I wish I can play this. These motivated me to pick up piano again, with my un-maintained (non-repairable) and out-of-tune piano.

I'm still playing on that piano. Yeah it's frustrated not able to use more advanced techniques, so I tried to find a better subsitute, that is playing on other pianos whenever possible. Now I am told I was admired , and motivated a few people like you to keep on playing.

P.S. I'm saving $ to get myself a new one.

[thalberg]

Well if you quit, you could save money on lessons.  You also could save money by not buying the nicer piano you mentioned.  Plus without having to practice, you'd have more time for other things.  You wouldn't have to deal with difficult passages, and you wouldn't have to listen to someone criticize all your efforts every week.  You could even take up a different hobby or use that time to work more and overcome the financial problems you mentioned. 

Reasons why not to quit?  I can't think of any, unless piano somehow makes you happy.  But it doesn't seem that way since you're quitting on your birthday, a day when most people try to do something nice for themselves.

[nyonyo]

I agree with Thalberg, if playing piano does not serve any purpose in your life, you'd better quit. It is a waste of time to do something that you do not even enjoy.

One may not be good in playing piano, but if he or she enjoys, I think they may want to continue.

Like me, my main purpose for practicing piano at this moment is to compete at amateur piano competitions. I start realizing that it is very difficult to play a one hour program flawlessly. It discourages me, I may give up the idea of entering competition, but I will not quit playing piano, because playing piano is fun for me. I may quit taking lesson so that I can save my $160 per month.

[aewanko]

Thinking about it, this decision of mine is making me second-guess it. Like when my mom would wonder why I don't play it anymore, she'll probably scold me. Anther reason why I'm second guessing is because I'm planning to play for my friends at my home. I don't know what to think.

[thalberg]

Now I can see why this decision is confusing you.  You do not want your mother be unhappy and to scold you, and you also would like to play for your friends.

You cannot see what you want..... you only see what other people want.  That is a very confusing position indeed.

You know, some people are the opposite--they only see what they want, and other peoples desires and choices mean nothing to them.  These kinds of people often act selfishly and hurt others.  But they are never confused.

But people like you are so concerned with others' desires that you cannot see your own.  This often makes you very kind, but also very stressed and confused.  You must learn to do what you want to do and what will make you happy.  You must not feel bad about how it will affect others--as long as you are not harming their well-being or doing anything with cruel intentions, then you are free from blame.

[healdie]

playing piano for most people is a hobbie a pastime and if you do not enjoy it then you shouldn't be doing it there are no legal obligations for you to play, i am sure that if you met someone who was a birdwatcher but hated the sight of birds you would think him rather odd and possibly crazy

[nyonyo]

Awenko,

Are you Asian? If you are, I could understand what a scary decision for you to make. Making a declaration that you want to stop doing thing that you do not want to do any more is one of the big decision that you need to take. I know that your mom will hunt you all over places and force you to do something. It is what will generally happen. But if you are persistant, your mom will not be able to do anything. At the end you will triumph!

My older sister experienced the same problem. I have dealt with so many Asian students, the mom will eventually gave in. Good luck!!!

[m]

I'm thinking about quitting the piano next month (aka my birthday).

I've been quitting piano forever..., so let me know how it's going and if it worked

[aewanko]

I've been quitting piano forever..., so let me know how it's going and if it worked

I don't know how it's going.

Awenko,

Are you Asian? If you are, I could understand what a scary decision for you to make. Making a declaration that you want to stop doing thing that you do not want to do any more is one of the big decision that you need to take. I know that your mom will hunt you all over places and force you to do something. It is what will generally happen. But if you are persistant, your mom will not be able to do anything. At the end you will triumph!

My older sister experienced the same problem. I have dealt with so many Asian students, the mom will eventually gave in. Good luck!!!

Yes and if I gave up, it would have been a waste of time & money (money because of the piano, I dont have a teacher). Another reason is that homework is taking too much time.


Got to think of the decision again.

[db05]

Happy birthday aewanko

I have never had a reasonably good piano since I learnt it many years ago. I was happy when I fired my teacher 11 years ago and not touched a single key for years. Then I started to admire one of my friend who was playing Chopin nocturne really well, and at the same time I listened to some pieces and thought I wish I can play this. These motivated me to pick up piano again, with my un-maintained (non-repairable) and out-of-tune piano.

I'm still playing on that piano. Yeah it's frustrated not able to use more advanced techniques, so I tried to find a better subsitute, that is playing on other pianos whenever possible. Now I am told I was admired , and motivated a few people like you to keep on playing.

P.S. I'm saving $ to get myself a new one.

Sounds familiar. I fought my piano teacher when I was around 5 or 6, and for 10 years I focused on school, went to science high, where pursuing the arts is discouraged. I was 16 when I got music lessons, and that was for guitar. I wanted to play the piano again, but we had no more piano so we had my aunt's piano fixed this year. It's not so out of tune, but the keys are heavy and get stuck. The one I used before has okay keys, but is a whole tone out of tune... I wonder if it's too late to start over again. I mean, I don't like maths very much though it's my forte. And I realized I want to be a piano teacher.

My advice? Just keep your options open.

[iumonito]

I've been quitting piano forever..., so let me know how it's going and if it worked

Marik, A kindred spirit!

Rachmaninoff is said to have a bon mot: music is enough for a lifetime, but a lifetime not enough for music.

No matter how skillful, talented or popular you are at the piano, there will be times when you feel that what you do at the piano is inadequate.  At times you will feel you can not do it well (no matter how good you are, I promise), sometime you will feel that it is not worth all the time, effort and sacrifice you put into it (no matter how little that is).

But then, sometimes, you will either sit down and play something, or practice an old piece, or read something new, or listen to a record or see a performance, and you get this joy of music (maybe is a sad feeling, maybe a scary one, no matter, it is a strong feeling that overtakes you and fills you).  And then, at those times, it is very clear that once you have the piano (and rather: music) as part of your life, the only question is how much time will you devote to it at various points in your life.  Maybe it is zero, maybe a little more, but the piano will always be part of who you are.

You can quit the fantasy of an international piano career, of playing concerts with the London Symphony Orchestra and recording the entire piano literature for Deutsche Grammophon.  In fact, you can quit that paradigm even if you have done it and could continue to do it (consider Ivo Pogorelich).  You can quit playing in public, and then change your mind and perform again (consider Horowitz).  You can consider quitting trying to impress people with your piano playing and do something else for your day job (Jorge Bolet served in the military before embarking in a teaching career, all of that well before starting late in life the phenomenal career he had after age 50).  You can quit these externals and continue to enjoy music-making at the piano.

Take a break from lessons.  Live a little.  Perhaps you will find the piano again in the future (or perhaps not, no shame in that; in that case, it will turn out it was a very good use of your time not to practice the piano anymore).

Best wishes.

[icilkovich]

iumonito have a really good post there.

I once wanted to quit piano. At that time, I didn't find the joy of piano playing. Every lesson I had was dull and boring as I felt the teacher was just sitting next to me, listening to my playing, and simply said "practice more" or "okay, next piece." At that time, I was using electric piano, so you can't say I was using a good quality piano.

But even after having that thought, I didn't quit. Because I was curious and I wanted to experience all the joys that other performers show from the music though I couldn't afford a piano even until I studied piano for 12 years.

The point is do you still want more experience from piano? If you don't, you can always quit. That's probably better, like with others have said. And if you still want more, you shouldn't give up that easily.

oh, happy birthday btw.

[db05]

Awenko,

Are you Asian? If you are, I could understand what a scary decision for you to make.

More specifically, are you a Filipino? Just a wild thought.
A... Ewan ko... (Translates: Uh, I don't know.) 

[concerto_love]

U can quit and back again if u feel missed it, I guess... The same happened to me b4. Happy bufdae..!