What can drive you mad?

[trish89]

what can make you really angry? if your students aren't prepaired, they come late or they never pay attention? where is your limit of patience? have you ever kicked your students out of your lesson? what do you most appreciate about your students?

Iam curious though Iam not a teacher 

[lostinidlewonder]

I don't take anything personal. If students don't study it doesn't effect my life, it is their problem! If you take things negative things personally you cannot be a teacher, that's for sure.

I usually punish my students by making them repeat sections until they memorize it. It doesn't bother me but it exhausts these young students who probably never do more than 10 minutes of practice in one go by themselves anyway! Then I tell them how much easier it would be if they did some of these repetitions over the week instead of all in one day Some learn, some don't, but all dread the drilling they get if they don't do it themselves All my students know where they have to be the next week, if that is not satified the lesson is spent getting up to that standard. A waste of money for them since the same lesson last week pretty much will be repeated, it doesn't bother me. If repeating lessons bothered me I would have quit a long time ago.

[Bob]

Parents who don't pay. 

Students who quit without any real reason.

Students who play games, like "forgetting" their music.

One that stands out a little more was parent who thought practicing for me personally was all fun.  It's not real work.  It's all fun when you practice. 

[quantum]

Games regarding payment trying to get as much as a bargain as they can. 

Random changes in lesson scheduling at the last minute.



Student's who don't practice don't annoy me.  I make it clear at the start of lessons that the onus is on them to practice and to put to work the knowledge I give them.  If they want to hear the same lesson over and over and over and over again because they didn't do their work, it's fine by me.  I almost never nag about how much a student practices. 

[Bob]

You can always practice with/for the student during the lesson if they don't practice.  I think that's more of a concern than a frustration though.

Tedious paperwork and documentation.  That is reeeeally annoying.  Doing those things you have to do, and they have to be perfect in case anyone ever looks but no one most likely will. 

[dan101]

A bad attitude is pretty awful to deal with. I always try to keep a cool head, especially if a child comes into a lesson already angry at something or someone.

[trish89]

hmm do you know you surprised me alot? I thought teachers mind alot when they students don't practise, or at least my last teacher did, she even kicked the students. So I admire your patience....
But what about performances? You put only your best students there or you don't mind if they mess the pieces up?

[go12_3]

I have the patience to deal with all sorts of students....I teach from a 6 year old up to 15 years old.  If they don't practice, we review during the lesson.  No big deal really.  It's up to the student on what and how much they want to learn and progress.  I like my fees to be paid on time, so that causes some stress.  I had to kick out a 7 year student who had an attitude and I tried to work with her.  I called the mother, and she had a fit, "You're giving up on her?" she exclaimed.  Yes, I did;  I will NOT tolerate a student that won't take in directions from me.  And that was the only time that drove me MAD.  Also, when a parent makes an appointment to meet with me to make arrangements for a lesson schedule-----they do not show up.  Oh, that has been a usual thing to deal with.

[quantum]

hmm do you know you surprised me alot? I thought teachers mind alot when they students don't practise, or at least my last teacher did, she even kicked the students. So I admire your patience....
But what about performances? You put only your best students there or you don't mind if they mess the pieces up?

I have similar sentiments as go12_3.  I do my part by preparing the teaching materials, it is up to the student to do his/her part and continue to apply the lesson techniques on their own time.  I am a very patient person and don't mind one bit repeating the same lesson again and again.  If the student doesn't practice, we practice during the lesson and I also instruct on how the student could practice more effectively at home. 

Messing up during a recital is a good learning process.  Students usually become stronger after such ordeals.  Of course we don't wish such things to happen, but we all come across some sort of struggles and should learn to deal with them as opposed to shutting down when faced with them.  I like to think of a recital as a gathering of music making and discovery, rather than a place to display your most talented students. 

[lau]

Students who quit without any real reason.

Students who play games, like "forgetting" their music.

One that stands out a little more was parent who thought practicing for me personally was all fun.  It's not real work.  It's all fun when you practice. 

I actually did loose my music one time, im sure my teacher thought i was lying. Then I ended up finding it  in the closet.

[trish89]

Messing up during a recital is a good learning process.  Students usually become stronger after such ordeals.  Of course we don't wish such things to happen, but we all come across some sort of struggles and should learn to deal with them as opposed to shutting down when faced with them.  I like to think of a recital as a gathering of music making and discovery, rather than a place to display your most talented students. 

I know, I personally think it's good to put every student there cause then the student can have the inspiration to play better or not to be so nervous next time....
I visit opera lessons and my teacher puts only her best students on concerts....It doesn't seem to me good, sometimes it looks really funny cause every concert has only 4,5 same people. It's like "the new one" or "worse one" don't even have some chances to try it. If I ask why, the answer is "It has to be perfect and I know these people won't disappoint me."

[go12_3]

what can make you really angry? if your students aren't prepaired, they come late or they never pay attention? where is your limit of patience? have you ever kicked your students out of your lesson? what do you most appreciate about your students?

Iam curious though Iam not a teacher 

I appreciate students who cooperate and being attentive.  That's important for me. I like students to have a sense of humor and not be so serious about being perfect, it's a learning process and should be enjoyable.  I appreciate students who are polite to me and respect me, say thank you after a lesson.  I work hard in teaching so I hope my students realize it means a lot to me by their attitude and doing their best.  Lessons should be a pleasant experience, not demanding nor making the lesson hard.    best wishes to you trish.  = )

[communist]

When all they want to learn is Chopin and Beethoven.

[quantum]

When all they want to learn is Chopin and Beethoven.

That ain't so bad.  What if all they wanted to learn was the latest Hannah Montana song?

[keypeg]

One that stands out a little more was parent who thought practicing for me personally was all fun.  It's not real work.  It's all fun when you practice

I don't understand this one ..... literally.  Are you saying the parent thought that when the child practiced at home for the next lesson, this practicing would be fun?  (To me practicing is done at home, and "for me" would mean toward the next lesson when you play in front of the teacher.  But I don't know if that is what you mean by "practice for me".)  By "fun" do you mean frivolous or careless, playing around, rather than enjoyable?

My first reaction was "What's wrong with that?" because I thought you were saying that practising in anticipation of a future lesson is an enjoyable thing to do.  Well, it is an enjoyable thing to do.  But it's a "hard work" kind of enjoyable.  So what do you mean? (Curious)

[Bob]

That was a parent referring to my own practicing.  I knew practicing was going to work and a little painful.  The parent's attitude was that I was going to sit in a room and play games and enjoy myself.  It's just fun.  It's not like real work.  I was thinking... I have to practice.  I will practice.  It's going to be work, but I will get something done.  And it's probably going to hurt a little. 

[keypeg]

I can see how that could be annoying. 

[shinerl]

If I feel so dumb.

[a-sharp]

People honking their horn to pick up kids from the neighbor's house while I'm trying to teach.

[quantum]

People honking their horn to pick up kids from the neighbor's house while I'm trying to teach.

Can you put a horn on your house?  Hook it up to a MIDI keyboard and honk back 

[Bob]

Being asked/expected to put a square peg in a round hole.  That idea.

[pianowolfi]

Being asked/expected to put a square peg in a round hole.  That idea.

i.e squaring the circle?

[Bob]

Being asked to do something that really isn't possible.

[quantum]

Hmmmm....

[a-sharp]

Can you put a horn on your house?  Hook it up to a MIDI keyboard and honk back 

LOL - this is a brilliant idea. Even  better if I could directly wire it into their car & avoid annoying the other neighbors in the process. Jerks.

[pianowolfi]

Hmmmm....

sure it's doable. But for the famous "squaring the circle" you're only allowed to use compass and ruler and so far nobody could resolve this. Squaring the circle: Drawing a square the same area as a given circle.

Same goes for these:

   
    * Doubling the cube: Drawing a cube with twice the volume as a given cube.
    * Trisecting the angle: Dividing a given angle into three smaller angles all of the same size.

https://www.onpedia.com/encyclopedia/Ruler-and-compass-construction

[go12_3]

I thought this thread was about what makes you mad when a student or parent does something....and now it's into  drawing a cube and a circle???  Wow.    

[pianowolfi]

Yepp I'm sorry for going so much off topic   I imagined somebody asking me to do something impossible  (which also really can drive me mad) and I would just answer "Dont ask me to square the circle!"

[communist]

That ain't so bad.  What if all they wanted to learn was the latest Hannah Montana song?

i would rather that

[trish89]

I thought this thread was about what makes you mad when a student or parent does something....and now it's into  drawing a cube and a circle???  Wow.    

LOL!
My poor topic  I now know enough about teachers here 

[go12_3]

When my piano rattles while I play my Debussy's Toccata!       

[joyfulmusic]

Without question parents get the award.  Couple of samples.  I go to student's houses.  This one 8 year old was having her first lesson with me (not her first lesson ever).  Mom sat On the Floor with her feet under the piano bench and answered questions I asked the daughter.  After - trying ever so nicely - to get the mom to butt out I had to drop her.  Yuck.

One mom like to treat me like a music nanny.  So, would I mind if, the 3 year old had a lesson today cause Johnny had to go to soccer.  Then, when I said ya I mind.  She planned their "time" with me however she wanted.  The dad was taking lessons too.  I had to drop them.

Yep, it's parents that drive me mad.

[nanabush]

I have quite a list 

-Hearing other teachers butcher music that my students are learning

-Little kids not flushing the toilet when they use the bathroom

-Students forgetting to show up for lesson, followed by a stupid excuse obligating me to schedule a makeup lesson (sorry, we were randomly in Europe and decided not to tell you until after the lesson, can we have an hour makeup next week?)

-Forgetting books; once is fine, it happens, I do it sometimes... but honestly, a high school kid should not be forgetting her book for the better part of the year.

-The secretary booking makeups without notifying me, then getting pissed when I tell her that I honestly cannot make it... sorry, but run it by me first.

-When I give CLEAR-AS-DAY instructions such as "Ok I want you to play measure 8-9 slowly with your right hand.  Add the pedal too."  And the kid just starts the piece over again hands together, at blinding speed, with about 50% correct notes. 

-The secretary bringing takeout food every single day!! It saturates the building in the smell of whatever greasy food she's eating that day.

-Parents sitting in on lessons: I still have yet to find one positive aspect about this (unless it's the first lesson and the parent is telling me about the kids habits, personality, etc.).  They are too controlling, and feel the need to translate whatever I say into "baby-english" even though the kid is perfectly capable of reading/writing.

Even with all those pet peeves, I still love teaching 

[timothy42b]

-When I give CLEAR-AS-DAY instructions such as "Ok I want you to play measure 8-9 slowly with your right hand.  Add the pedal too."  And the kid just starts the piece over again hands together, at blinding speed, with about 50% correct notes. 

That one should make you mad, I think, but not at the student. 

Your CLEAR-AS-DAY wasn't.  Except for the rare rebellious child, and you'd know that from other symptoms, this is almost always failure on the transmitter side, not the receiver side. 

[nanabush]

I don't think we're talking about identical scenarios.  I mean when a kid already has the piece memorized, but with all the wrong notes and dynamics.  He doesn't know where measure 8 is, has to restart in order to play from there.

I meant students who let muscle memory completely over.  I'm also not referring to a 4 year old beginner (I didn't make that clear).  I have some preteen students who can understand instructions like "C major scale, D major triad, play piece X hands seperate", but I guess you could say they're being stubborn by ignoring select instructions I give them.

If I only have a 30 minute lesson a week with a student, and I give them a goal that week, I can't ultimately control really if they are going to follow it or not.  The kid will learn the entire thing poorly, and keep it at that level.  Measure 8 means nothing to him, he just kinda plays the piece blindly.

[timothy42b]

If I only have a 30 minute lesson a week with a student, and I give them a goal that week, I can't ultimately control really if they are going to follow it or not.  The kid will learn the entire thing poorly, and keep it at that level. 

Quite right.  However, you'd be surprised how often you think you communicated that goal, but it was not understood, for which you often blame them. 

Measure 8 means nothing to him, he just kinda plays the piece blindly.

That is not an observation, that is a very judgmental deduction, not likely to be productive.

Children have a three word attention span, teenagers a five word.  If you talk longer than that most of the time you've lost them.

"look at measure 8."  "now point to it."  "now play that measure."  "again, slower."  "add the pedal" 

"At home you must play that measure 25 times per day."  Going to have to say that 3 times, because you've exceeded the 3 word limit.  Then you're going to have to ask.  "what measure are you going to practice?"  "right.  how many times?" 

How times have we seen or done this:  "Play it like this."  <demonstrates>  <child understands, reaches for the piano to try it, teacher interrupts>  "This is because ......blah blah blah..........."  <student loses interest, tunes out>  "Now you try."  <student dutifully bangs keys but no longer has a clue what teacher wanted.>  <teacher becomes angry because student doesn't understand simple clear directions> 

[Bob]

I thought of one.  On the parent side.  When you make a point to tell the parent what the lesson is and what it isn't, and they understand and agree to take the lessons.  But then for evaluations, they criticize you for the things you aren't doing, the things that were never a part of the plan that you made a point to tell them about.

[go12_3]

When  parents don't buy the books for their child's lessons!  I mean, I don't plan to loan books; I used to and it was a pain.  No more loaning books to my students.  They will play from *my* book at the lesson but not take it home.  I can't be responsible for parents getting the books most of the time.   

best wishes,

go12_3

[Bob]

Another book related one -- Getting stiffed for buying the book.  I've had at least three students that left and I'm stuck with a new book.  And I wasn't aware of the idea of returns (year ago) or I sat on the book too long to return it.  Sometimes you can recycle it to another student but I still got stuck.  I guess letting the parents buy the book themselves is a better idea.

[joyfulmusic]

Hands down it's the parents who are annoying.  Scheduling their kids for other things and then asking if they can have a makeup time... I'm going to semester payments next year cause i'm sick of the games with the parents.  It's the wealthiest ones that are the tightest.

When a kid says, after I have pointed out an error,  "that's what I did".  RRRRRRRRRRRRR.

[go12_3]

Joyfulmusic:

Indeed parents can be annoying.  In my policy I don't do make up lessons.  And I write a letter to each parent of my students in August, letting them know about my 16 week of teaching from September through December.  What annoys me are the holidays that bumps my students' schedule off track.  I wish I would charge for the *semester*,  but the economy is taking its toll on everyone, even myself.  So I have to charge the 4 lesson a month, maybe, I can think of some parents that might be willing to to do that though....got me thinking.  Thanks for your post.

best wishes,

go12_3