Cheers! :)

[Bob]

All right all non-US people who want to be "with it" on their fine dining cuisine, listen up.  go_123 and american_girl are just trying to trick you.  Ask yourself, have you ever seen tator tots at any formal dining experiences in your country?  Of course not.  Not to offend, but you're probably not attending the high level gatherings that would be able to afford such luxuries.  Try asking for them.  You'll get looks and sneers because the caterers for these events feel themselves unworthy and have to put down tator tots.  In fact, they're simply unable to get them to begin with or can't afford to buy them. 

I'm not talking about french fries.  Those are common, ordinary, and something completely different different. 

Don't be fooled.  Don't buy into what these other posters are saying.  They're trying to elude you.  (Maybe they're trying to horde tator tots for themselves?)  You can trust me.  My name's Bob afterall and that's a very trust worthy name.  Why would I lie to you?  Look at all my forum posts and you'll know I speak the truth about tator tots. 

Tator tots are very difficult to come by so these other posters are probably just trying to get some themselves and don't want any competition *IF* they can get any, or they just don't want the sky high price of tator tots to go any higher than it already is.  Dont' be fooled. 

 

  (Bob wonders if he should avail other forum members of his secret sources for tator tots since he might, *might* be able to get some tator tots shipped internationally [shhh] for lower prices, say... $1,000 per oz.  or maybe the extreme price of $100/oz if someone were to buy pounds of them.  It also depends on ocean currents and when flocks of tators are in season of migrating.  Bob does not post this option in case Nils hears about it.  )

It's not wise to buy so called "black market" tator tots.  You never know what's in those or if they "cut" them with something.  Better to be safe. 

I don't think a lot of foreign people would even be aware of tator tots, they're so rare.  It's probably been a secret in the U.S. high society for a long time now. 

[Bob]

Good, a second page.     This will help keep those tator tot rumor mongers at bay.

(Bob puts out another plate of highly expensive, rare, and extremely valuable tator tots.. which he carefully measured out by the ounce.)

Enjoy.  I went to great lengths to get this.  Heaven forbid my professional level oven is off a few tenths of degrees when preparing these babies.

[american_girl]

hahaha tater tots were ruined with napoleon dynamite

[Bob]

Gosh!

[go12_3]

So Go12_3  sits down with her cherish tater tots, and raises a glass and says,
                  "CHEERS"  to Bob who is also, eating away his hoard of tater tots
    and thinking, life is good indeed with my Idaho tater tots!   

[Bob]

(Bob begins forming a tator tot hill in the shape of a large mountain with a flat top... He doesn't know why.  He just feels a strong compulsion to do so...)

[go12_3]

And Go is wondering how can Bob possibly can do such a task!  Oh, my!
To see the day of the mountain of tater tots......and oh, where can Bob be?  Inside this mountain of tots? 

[Bob]

All right.  It's fake.  I admit it.  There simply aren't enough tator tots for that and the expense would be enormous.  Only the outside is coated with a thin layer of tator tots, giving it the appearance of being a complete tator tot mountain.

[american_girl]

[go12_3]

Cheers to tator tots!  I love them!   

[csharp_minor]

(Bob sets out a plate of tator tots and ketchup to celebrate.)

For those of you are foreign and don't know it (you're foreign), or for those not familiar with the U.S.

  Looks like dog biscuits or croquettes to me so yes I'm foreign I guess.   

[Bob]

What?  How dare you!?  Obviously you know nothing of tator tots if you're comparing them to dog biscuits.  Such boldness!  Perhaps you do not have the refined palette necessary for such fine cuisine.  [I'm joking.  Don't be offended.  But I'm not joking about the high quality of tator tots.... (Bob considers launching into a commercial)]

On the more serious side, that's the reaction I've heard sometimes on various arts topics.  Don't like it?  Criticize it?  Then you don't anything and must be low class/no taste. 

[csharp_minor]

What?  How dare you!?  Obviously you know nothing of tator tots if you're comparing them to dog biscuits.  Such boldness! 

Sorry I did not mean to offend your beloved Tator Tots TM .
 

Perhaps you do not have the refined palette necessary for such fine cuisine. 

Oh, I do have taste alright :



Lol ! and behold the notorious Turkey Twizzler! the main staple luchtime food of teenagers until celebrity chef Jamie Oliver got them banded in schools .

*btw any animal lovers will be happy to know I do not eat any processed poultry products anymore unless the animals are free-ranged * 

[Bob]

Why yes.  Those look... delicious?  MMMm MMM.   If they're deep fried, all the better.

Tator tots are made with free-range tators as well I believe.  Raised on farms where they allowed to roam free if they choose.  Of if they choose not to, that's ok too.

[csharp_minor]

Why yes.  Those look... delicious?  MMMm MMM.   If they're deep fried, all the better.

Tator tots are made with free-range tators as well I believe.  Raised on farms where they allowed to roam free if they choose.  Of if they choose not to, that's ok too.

Deep fried! NOW thats an idea! No, I think they are usually cooked in the oven. But maybe in Scotland they would do deep fried Turkey Twizzlers in batter  .

Its nice to see the welfare standards for tators have been improved, no more battery spuds for me .

[Bob]

Cheers!  It's Friday again.  Time to get working on the weekend work now.


Hamburger for everyone! 

(Bob hands out hamburger.)  














 
Um.... I was busy.  You might want to cook that first.  And you might want to shape it into patties before you cook it.  You probably want to find a bun and some ketchup and mustard too.  (Bob thinks to self, "Man, I hope the expiration date was still good...")

[m19834]

I'll shape the patties.  I can make the best patty shape that there ever was ... it used to be one of my jobs when I was just a wee lil' one, helping me mum in the kitchen.  I will get all the stuff together to make our burgers, but somebody's going to have to BBQ them .

[Bob]

You'll have to wear rubber gloves if you make mine.  My food must never be touched by human hands.  And I should supervise any food preparation just to be on the safe side. 

It'll probably be easier if I make my own. 

[m19834]

Yeah, you are *way* on your own then.  I will *never* be supervised by Bob in the kitchen.  Anyway, you know Bob, it strikes me that you are the exact audience Carl's Junior is aiming for when they say "without us, some guys would starve" (okay, maybe Thal, too) ... c'mon Bob, stop being so crazy. 




                                                   And stop watching Top Gun.

[db05]

I'm in love again, so cheers! *raises her glass of orange juice*
Next 5 drinks are all on me! 

[Bob]

Yeah, you are *way* on your own then.  I will *never* be supervised by Bob in the kitchen.  Anyway, you know Bob, it strikes me that you are the exact audience Carl's Junior is aiming for when they say "without us, some guys would starve" (okay, maybe Thal, too) ... c'mon Bob, stop being so crazy. 




                                                   And stop watching Top Gun.

What's wrong with Top Gun?     Actually... I'm not sure there's much to the movie really. 

I don't eat fast food.  Yuck. 

And before even being supervised, any food handlers would have to go through hand sterlization training and that takes time. 

[go12_3]

I'm in love again, so cheers! *raises her glass of orange juice*
Next 5 drinks are all on me! 

thanks, db, cheers to you!     and cheers to love! 

[db05]

What? No one's taking the free drinks? I'll have them then.

*gulps 4 big mugs of extra strong beer*

I'm noth thrrungk yeth... Jussa lil sleeeeeepyyyy...

*throws up*

*collapses in a puddle of vomit*

[Bob]

Cheers!

*Bob pours champagne.*





*And then realizes the cork won't fit back on the bottle, so he duct tapes it shut.*

[j_menz]

realizes the cork won't fit back on the bottle, so he duct tapes it shut.*

Don't do that! Share the love!

[Bob]

One reason to drink it faster.  There's no cork.  It'll go bad if you don't drink it all right away.

[Bob]

Future king of England!  Cheers!

At least it's some positive news.  As opposed to serial killers out there and searching for bodies.

[oxy60]

Future king of England!  Cheers!

At least it's some positive news.  As opposed to serial killers out there and searching for bodies.

I agree! It's about time for something positive. I can't imagine anyone not happy about this birth, except maybe a couple of princes who got bumped down a notch.

As well congratulations to the new king of Belgium!

We have heard enough about "people's dirty laundry."

[j_menz]

I can't imagine anyone not happy about this birth, except maybe a couple of princes who got bumped down a notch.

And these guys:

[Bob]

*Bob cracks open a can of tator tots.*   Yeah, that's right.  I think the event is worth it.  I've been saving these canned tots for some time, just for an occasion like this.  Go ahead.  You guys can eat first.  In fact, you can eat all of them.  I won't have any.  All for you.

[oxy60]

*Bob cracks open a can of tator tots.*   Yeah, that's right.  I think the event is worth it.  I've been saving these canned tots for some time, just for an occasion like this.  Go ahead.  You guys can eat first.  In fact, you can eat all of them.  I won't have any.  All for you.

I didn't know tator tots came in a can. I get mine frozen and finish them in the fryer.

[the_fervid_pig]

I agree! It's about time for something positive. I can't imagine anyone not happy about this birth,

[j_menz]

...

Given the boy in question was the future Edward VIII, later the Duke of Windsor, he perhaps didn't find as many "sycophants and flatterers" as he might have liked.

[the_fervid_pig]

He was right about the last bit though.