The Loneliest Instrument

[faulty_damper]

I'm sitting in front of the piano looking at a book with a bunch of notes in it.  I proceed to play those notes upon the keyboard.  I play until I need to turn the page and then another.  Aside from the noise of cars driving on the streets, it's very quiet.  It's just me and the piano.  

There is no one else around me.  No one to talk or anyone to criticize my playing.  So I look back at the book with the notes in it and continue to play.

I soon go into this little world where I ignore everything around me and focus only on what is in front of me.  I start humming the melody as I'm more adept at humming than I am at playing and I hum the melody in many ways to try to find the best way to hum it.  Then I play it.  Then suddenly, the birds outside start calling and I come out of this little world and look toward the window and see the light shining through.  I look around.  I see a large room.  I see a messy room.  I look back at the book, then at the keys and continue to play.

I stop playing.  I look around.  I hear the birds calling.  I get up and go to the window and look at what's going on outside.  Nothing very interesting from what I can see.  So now I open the window and poke my head out and look as far down the street as I can.  Just parked cars, the rustling of leaves.  And the birds calling I can see now.  I walk back to the piano leaving the window open.

It's noisy with the window open.  The wind blowing makes noise.  The calling of the birds is louder.  The cars driving by are even noisier.  I put my fingers back on the keyboard and continue playing.  I'm a bit less focused now with the extra noise but I don't seem to mind.  I'd rather have that distraction than without it for some reason.  It's also colder with the window open.  There's a long-sleeve shirt up in my room so I go there, put it on, and come back down and continue.

I continue doing what I'm doing.  There's no one around.  There's no one that I can talk to.  There's no one to criticize my playing.  There's no one.  Just me.  The blowing of the wind.  The calling of the birds.  The sound of cars driving by.  No one but me in this room.  Even in the house.  Just me.

But I am then joined by these people.  They open the house door and then stamp up the stairs making a lot of noise.  They look over in my direction and proceed to branch off into the kitchen, bathroom, and bedrooms.  I don't look back at them but the reflection of the black polish on the piano is a mirror I use to see what they had brought home.  I usually hope it's food.  My hopes are usually wrong.  I'm hungry.

These people don't say anything to me when I go into the kitchen.  I walk in, look around at what they have brought home, then open the refrigerator door, then the freezer door, and then walk out toward the piano.  I press a few keys and then stop.  I then get up and walk up to my room.  In that direction, I pass by one of the bedrooms in which one of these persons reside and I look in and look at the person sitting on her bed.  I then open my door and walk up the stairs to my room.

I don't know why I went up to my room.  I had no need to do so.  I must pass by someone's room to get here and then I proceed to walk back down the stairs after some loitering.  I don't head toward the piano, though.  I head toward the kitchen and open the refrigerator door, then the freezer.  Nothing.  This woman in the kitchen says something about washing the dishes and how I didn't do it with all the time I had home alone.  I don't say anything but walk out toward the piano and sit down and play.

I haven't said one word to these people yet.

The birds are still calling.  It seems like they are singing to the music.  I press a few keys and they respond.  They like either slow music or fast and upbeat music.  I'm dillusional.  They just call out randomly regardless of whether I play or not.  But still...

Still, if they appreciate my playing...

Do they?  I sure hope they do.  If not, then I'm still alone sitting on this bench with a book open in front of me.

I haven't said a word in hours.  Just some humming if that counts.  Would someone say something to me?  Would someone play with me?

It's still just the open book, the calling birds, the open window, and the cars driving by.  And some noise coming from the kitchen and bedroom.  The TVs have been turned on.

[Saturn]

Man, that's kind of bleak.  Unless you like it this way, that is.

How can you express yourself on the instrument with an outlook like this?

[shh its kaya]

I feel the same way when I play the piano, just for a few exceptions.  I don't try to get more noise, and when people come home, even if they have food and I'm starving, I NEVER stop playing the piano... until I am through practicing.  But I like the personal aspect of playing the piano.   To me, my piano is not a piano, but another person, and we talk with eachother and feel eachother's emotions.  Playing the piano for me is a wonderous feeling and, as Chopin said once, "Sometimes I can only groan, and suffer, and pour out my despair at the piano!"

Easily put, without the piano I would go insane and I would constantly be covered in paint, and there would be paint all over everything around me and a classical CD would be playing on repeat in the background and I would twitching.

Thank god I have a piano.  

[donjuan]

Faulty, after reading your prose, I seriously believe you have a career in literature.  You are quite the writer!  Very emotional...did you write that out sometime before, or did you just sit down at the computer and come up with it on the spot? Because that was just beautiful, man.

It's an interesting scenario you describe.  Musicians like us need to feed off this stuff for inspiration in music...
I cant play anything properly when I am happy and content- I need some kind of emotion or mood to kick start the music and make it emotional to anyone who decides to listen.
donjuan  

[faulty_damper]

...did you write that out sometime before, or did you just sit down at the computer and come up with it on the spot?

I just sat down with the title on my mind and begun to type.

It's lonely without human contact in front of the piano for hours.  I need someone who will play with me.  It won't be so lonely that way.

[bernhard]

Saturn:

Man, that's kind of bleak.  Unless you like it this way, that is.

How can you express yourself on the instrument with an outlook like this?

I disagree. If Faulty can express himself so well with words, it is scary to think what he can do at the piano…

Don Juan:

Faulty, after reading your prose, I seriously believe you have a career in literature.  You are quite the writer!

I agree. Faulty’s posts are always a pleasure to read. I look eagerly for his contributions.

Faulty:

I just sat down with the title on my mind and begun to type.

It's lonely without human contact in front of the piano for hours.  I need someone who will play with me.  It won't be so lonely that way.

Yes, Martha Argerich feels the same way. This is the main reason why she gives so few recitals, and why she prefers to play chamber music these days.

However you may feel lonely, but the piano is pretty self sufficient. On the other hand all the other instruments (and singers) desperately need a piano to accompany them So I think it should not be too difficult to find a more than willing partner. And let us not forget all the four hand/two piano repertory. So just offer yourself to accompany someone.

Here is the downside. Like all skilful circus acts that involve more than one person (juggling in groups, acrobatics, trapeze), these acts seem to completely depend on family, that is you will end up playing with either a brother/sister or a husband /wife. The reason is simple: you are going to invest a lot of time learning and perfecting repertory. What happens if your partner decides to walk away and go solo (or even worse to go with another accompanist?) So you must give careful thought to this matter, as careful as in the choice of a husband/wife, and you must commit if not for life for quite a long time. From experience, I will tell you that is very disheartening to have all Mozart violin sonatas (say) perfectly co-ordinated after a couple of years of hard work, just to see your violinist partner decide to give up. Then you have to start all over again with another violinist who may not even know the pieces (in which case you have to start from scratch) or who has a very different musical conception from the one you developed previously.

Anyway, didn’t you mention you had a sister who plays the piano? Go for the four hand repertory! (oh no! not with the sister! )

Best wishes,
Bernhard.

PS: Read this wonderful book about the experiences of a pianist playing chamber music and all the ups and downs of it:

Susan Tomes  - "Beyond the notes"

(Tomes was the pianist for the Domus quartet and is now the pianist for the Florestan trio)

[Spatula]

Give your piano a hug, faulty, it'll help, trust me.!  

Yeah sitting infront of the piano can be so bloody teadious, but somehow whenever I play it, I feel so much better because my time feels well spent, rather than PS2.  I never have regrets spending 3-4 hours on it, but my PS2...that's another story.

[faulty_damper]

Anyway, didn’t you mention you had a sister who plays the piano?

"Play" is a funny word as she rarely practices or plays anything even though she teaches at a music shop on Fridays and Saturdays.  I barely remember her practicing when she was taking lessons except for upcomming ABRSM exams or class recitals.


Anyway, we had a class piano recital this past weekend and afterwards, I asked two of the other students if they wanted to do something with me being the piano accompanist.  One plays the violin and I was thinking of some kind of sonata with him.  I'd like to do the adagio from Beethoven's "Spring" sonata.  The other person sings.  I was thinking of some of Schubert's songs because I love many of his songs.

I was so happy just to be able to talk to people about the piano and other things; I have no one to talk to about it, hence this forum.

But now I have to add that there is this girl.  Bernhard, remember when you said something about "hope she's pretty"?  Well, I'd like to do some four-hand repetory with her!  She's very pretty.  Also talented but who cares about that?  She's pretty!  Unfortunately, I'm scared of pretty girls I'm attracted to.  So I didn't talk to her even though I should have.  Any advice on how we can be practice partners?  I'd feel weird asking my teacher.  Maybe it was this girl that my teacher wanted me to play Chopin's Polonaise in A with.  If so, then I should really be kicking myself where it hurts BECAUSE I'M AN IDIOT FOR NOT LEARNING THE PIECE!!!

[shh its kaya]

Hey faulty, just curious, how old are you?

Pretty girls can be tricky, can't they...

But make sure she has brains too! (I can't stand a ditzy girl)

[faulty_damper]

I'm 22 years old.  I think she's still in high school.  Did I mention she's also interested?  Yeah, I'm an idiot.

I was too shy last year.  The year before that, I wasn't taking lessons...

So I'm an idiot.

[shh its kaya]

I'm 22 years old.  I think she's still in high school.  Did I mention she's also interested?  Yeah, I'm an idiot.

I was too shy last year.  The year before that, I wasn't taking lessons...

So I'm an idiot.

I'm only 17, and I have no grounds for giving advice on relationships at all, seeing how I've never had a girlfriend before (but oh how I've desperately tried to win a girl's heart) but I'd be careful as to how young this girl is.  Hopefully, when you say high school, maybe senior?  And I'm glad to see that I'm not going to be the only shy person at the age of 22.  Power to you Faulty!  I wish you the best.   Be like Nike and just do it.  Ask her if she'd be interested in a little four-play... four hand piano playing! (for those of you with naughty minds).  I just really hope she isn't like every other girl at my high school.  She plays the piano, so she may have hope.  The people at my school are soooo shallow or complete drug addicts.

Anyways, this post is completely off topic with the thread.  So, to redeem myself:

I love piano.  I love classical music.  And the only thing that keeps me going in life (and from all the rejections from girls) is the fact that I know my piano will always be there for me, and she will always listen.

All of you ought to give your piano a kiss the next time you practice on it.  Think about all the torture you put that poor thing through (I just remember the old days with "The Saints Come Marching In..." lol!).

Faulty, don't think of it as the Loneliest Instrument... think of it as the loyal companion!

[bernhard]

When someone is quite attractive, it's difficult to not see how attractive they are.  Actually, it is impossible unless the person is actually quite ugly in the behavioural/personality sense (pretty on outside, ugly on inside).  This is why less attractive people are easier to talk to because you can focus on other things about the person.  

Anyway, she's quite talented and flexible.  She's a dancer.  How do I know this if I didn't talk to her?  I saw her dance last year.  And she was one of the few who played her piece from memory.  Actually, I think she was the only one who was able to play her piece from memory aside from myself.  But she played much better than I did as I was too nervous to know what those white keys on the piano were.  She seems to be someone I could get along with if I am ever able to contact her.


The Loneliest Instrument
A hug and a kiss is not as impossible like one hand clapping.  I assume that no one is looking at me when I do it?  Because they might send me to a mental institution.  Or they might think I'm Narcissistic.  Or both.
The title was meant to be read one way but understood another.

Stop pussyfooting around it.

Go and ask her out.  

Don’t fall into the trap of becoming her “friend”/accompanist. Make sure she gets the right message. Use corny chat up lines if you need to (“I’m new in town, can tell me where you live?”). Schumann and Schubert wrote four hand piano music explicitly for the purpose of getting laid. Do not waste all this beautiful music.

Remember, if she is pretty and talented, there will plenty of bastards out there that will not be pussyfooting around.  

Finally. Be careful what you ask from the Universe. You might get it. (From a twice married veteran, he he )

Best wishes,
Bernhard.

[squinchy]

Bernhard, that post sounded completely IW inspired.  

I think it's hard for outsiders to understand what music actually means to some people. They seem to see the piano as an instrument-a tool that we use to make sound, perhaps music. But to us, it's almost a companion, more of an equal, less of an inanimate object.

On another note, does four hand music for two people with contrasting levels exist? One person at the Clementi Sonatina level, not very enthusiastic, about to quit, more interested in punk rock and history-like stuff, etc..and the other at ABRSM grade 7/8/8+?, quite enthusiastic, also interested in history-like stuff?

Squinchy

[janice]

Must be nice to be a guy and have at least SOME control--you ask the women out, whereas us women have to sit around and wait for a man to ask us out!!  I'm tellin ya, it's a drag!!
<sigh>
(It's Saturday nite and I sit by the window, waiting for a man with a single rose in his hand to come knocking on my door.  Knowing my stupid luck, he probably is just asking for directions to the nearest restaurant!) LOL

Go for it faulty...ask her out.  Who cares if she is younger.  Lots of women like older men--like me.  I go for men that are 15-20 years older!

[faulty_damper]

That's great advice, ask her out.  But see, the problem is:  The last time I saw her, was last years piano recital!  I never see any of the other students except before my lesson (as he is finishing up his) and after (as I am finishing up mine.  In fact, seeing anyone is rare.  In my two and a half years or so from this teacher, I've only met two students before lessons began and only seen two students at the end of lessons.  That's a total of four people!  And I've only seen each of these four people a total of one time each!  That's it.  I never see anyone regularly before me or anyone regularly after me.

Part of the reason is that my lessons have traditionally been on Fridays at 10:30am for an hour.  For this summer, it will be 10:30 on Tuesdays.

 I'm in college and now that most of her older students have graduated from highschool and go to universities far from here... i think there's only one other student is in college and still takes lessons.  She's the singer that has passed the 8th grade ABRSM exam.  Everyone else is just gone!  Gone!  Last years class recital was huge with many students playing advanced repetory and this year was like a small get-together at a saloon Chopin would play at.

If you are a teacher, make sure your students don't graduate from highschool.  And if they do, make sure they don't go to some far off university!  You'll lose a lot of students that way.

So anyway, I never see any of the other students.  I'm thinking of asking my teacher about her but how do I do that?  I'm going to ask her about being the accompanist for the violinist (his accompanist for the recital was the teacher) and I'm going to ask about the singer as I want to play a Schubert song.  I've already talked to both of them and they have said yes to the idea.  And I want to ask about the girl because she's pretty and I need a girlfriend... but I didn't talk to her during the recital.

[faulty_damper]

On another note, does four hand music for two people with contrasting levels exist? One person at the Clementi Sonatina level, not very enthusiastic, about to quit, more interested in punk rock and history-like stuff, etc..and the other at ABRSM grade 7/8/8+?, quite enthusiastic, also interested in history-like stuff?

Squinchy

I think Mozart wrote some concertos for people with varrying degrees of ability.  Just because he was a nice guy and because they requested it.

[janice]

Faulty, have your teacher play a little "matchmaker" for you.  Do you feel comfortable enough with your teacher to ask him/her to do that?  I feel comfortable enough with MY teacher, but I guess that I'm too chicken to say "Help!  I need a man", ya know?!  Besides, I'm very very picky and nobody understands it.  But seriously, only you know if you and your teacher have that kind of relationship.  Tell your teacher that you are interested in her and could he/she "arrange" for the two of you play a duet for some particular function or event.  That way, you two will need to practice together frequently.  If you don't want your teacher involved in this, then ask the girl if she will play a duet with you for some certain event.  This is fun!  I love giving  romantic advice (probably because I'm too chicken to do it myself! lol So I project it onto others!lol)

[bernhard]

On the other hand, here is some cautionary warning/advice from none other than Chopin himself:

[…] I have been thinking a great deal about inspiration and creativity and I have very slowly mad an important discovery. Inspiration and ideas only come to me when I have not had a woman for a long time […] A creative person must keep women out of his life, the energy collecting in his system will not go  form his cock and balls into the woman’s womb but into his brain in the form of inspiration and will perhaps give birth to a great work of art. Think of it, the temptation which drives us men into a woman’s arms can be transformed into inspiration! […] Think of it, my sweetest Phindela, how much of that precious fluid and energy I have wasted on you ramming you to no purpose […] Ballads, Polonaises, even a whole concerto may have been lost forever up your “des durka”, I can’t tell how many. I have been so deeply engulfed in my love for you I have hardly created anything, everything creative went straight from my cock into your des durka, you are now carrying my music in your womb. […] When the coach will at long last bring you back I’ll cling so hard that for a whole week you won’t be able to get me out of you. Bother all inspiration, ideas and works of art […] I kiss you all over your dear little body and inside.
Your faithful Frycek, your most talented pupil who has mastered the art of love .

(Letter to Countess Delphina Potocka, 1833)




Best wishes,
Bernhard.

[faulty_damper]

But what of Schumann?  Are you implying that even though he and Clara were married, he still wasn't getting any?!  He wrote a hell of a lot of beautiful music after marrying her...

But he was getting some.  Actually with 8+ pregnancies, he was getting an awful lot!

[bernhard]

Most of the really good stuff was composed before marriage.

From 1846 (they were married September 1840) Schumann actually kept in his diary the frequency of intercourse (probably as a way of birth control – not that it worked, Clara got pregnant ten times), they were doing it an average every 2 out of 5 days (unless he was exaggerating).

Schumann also typically had intense burst of creativity. These usually coincided with the times of celibacy, like for instance, right after birth.

Brahms on the other hand, never had any (his relationship with Clara remained platonic).

Sorry. I guess you need to choose between bestial flesh desires or spiritually uplifiting music.

[faulty_damper]

Sorry. I guess you need to choose between bestial flesh desires or spiritually uplifiting music.

Uplifting music... Isn't that what CDs are for?  And can't those CDs be played while....https://www.pianoforum.net/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.cgi?board=repo;action=display;num=1087480717

See, Bernhard, I can have it both ways! And both ways!

[faulty_damper]

Faulty, have your teacher play a little "matchmaker" for you.  Do you feel comfortable enough with your teacher to ask him/her to do that?  I feel comfortable enough with MY teacher, but I guess that I'm too chicken to say "Help!  I need a man", ya know?!  Besides, I'm very very picky and nobody understands it.  But seriously, only you know if you and your teacher have that kind of relationship.  Tell your teacher that you are interested in her and could he/she "arrange" for the two of you play a duet for some particular function or event.  That way, you two will need to practice together frequently.  If you don't want your teacher involved in this, then ask the girl if she will play a duet with you for some certain event.  This is fun!  I love giving  romantic advice (probably because I'm too chicken to do it myself! lol So I project it onto others!lol)

Well, I inquired my teacher about me + her = practice partners (with possibility of going exponential, though I didn't say this  ).  She said "I know what you mean".  And was against the idea.

As it turns out, she's in China, though my teacher didn't mention this until near the end of this conversation about her.  A one hour lesson turned into 2 hours (though the latter was a lot of talk about stuff [abrsm exams and how it's a waste of my time to take the Gr5 theory, abrsm exam and how their own edition is "correct" and how my new founded technique to play this one piece was wrong, my repetory list that I'd like to accomplish, some Alkan and how she didn't have the time to listen to the Opus 39 Concerto CD {Damn!  I really wanted my CD back so I could listen to it}, and the idea of my being accompanist to the violinist and singer, whom she said was a soprano {great!  I have no idea she was a soprano; thought she was whatever was lower than a soprano - an alto?} and of course, practice partners... ])

I'm waiting for the call back from the violinist.  This is the only thing I came away with. :-/

Damn, I gotta go dig up that Chinese Parents thread in the Anything but Piano forum.