hmmm ... you don't think I am an unmodest and disgusting pig for my comments ? Instead you want to know about it ? heh.
Let's see. For a good while even in my life in this world, I was in a phase where I felt that if/when I loved something so much, I could prove it to myself and love it even more by letting it go (even though it would sometimes badly hurt to do so). I don't even remember now a few of the small examples that I have, but I remember privately throwing something that I cherished into the ocean at one time. And, many times, I have given away to a friend something that I most prized. That was also out of love for them, feeling that I loved them so much, I would give them those things that I most prized and cherished myself. There is more to it than that, but suffice to say, eventually I realized some grave mistakes along those lines, ha ha.
Anyway, I have even had a violin student in this life, believe it or not, and I have dabbled a bit at it when I had to take a class in University. One evening in the midst of my University experience, at a time when I was becoming more fully conscious than ever before of who I am as a musician, I was nearly asleep and I suddenly heard the most heavenly little violin 'lick' in my head and it snapped me awake. Somehow I will never forget that sound, yet funnily enough, trying to write it down is just ... it makes me insane, because ... well, it's like some kind of ... teaser. Maybe there is *way* too much more there ... or maybe there is nothing at all ? I don't know.
Anyway, what I need right now more than anything is the time and space. For me it is a new (

) thing to have access to the modern piano, and that is just an overwhelming curiosity to me

.