I played through some actual music today. Surprise, surprise. It's nice to play through some actual music, but... I really noticed that my hands feel a bit creaky lately and if I'm not doing my technical routine, these pieces weren't doing much for my technique at all. I think that's the main concern.
These were easy pieces and I was just sight-reading. I felt like the time was wasted a bit -- The technical routine would have packed so much more in, given me a physical and somewhat mental workout (I'm thinking through some chords and things for part of it, so that does give the mind a workout, drilling things).
I just can't get my mind around it. Even if I played these pieces today top-notch/polished performance, they wouldn't have pushed my technique much.
Maybe I need to learn to read better.
If I take a difficult piece, one that will push my technique, it would probably be difficult to read too. Or I would have to engrain the piece into my hands. That's a least of a month of "practicing" (whatever it is, drilling a piece into the hands)... at least a month of drilling it in before I might start pushing technique. And then it's a situation where the body has to adjust -- strain it a bit, allow it to heal, reset the form and ease things... and I have more technique. At that point, I've got the piece drilled into my hands, so I'm not reading the music anymore. If I start to push the technique, I'm not working on the musical/expressive side anymore, it's more like I'm bastardizing the piece by just working on technique. Or if I focus on the musical side... maybe that's it, maybe I'm working on pieces that are too difficult, too far outside my technique. Because that's where the problem tends to be. I get bogged down on the piece (maybe a general flaw of bogging down in general, perfecting everything... then notice more minute details and working to perfect those...). But I would end up taking a piece of music, getting to a point where my technique is pushed, and end up not being able to play the piece well (because I don't have the technique), and end up... I think I was just repeating the piece or push the tempo. Then end up with a half-ass performance of it. Which I didn't like of course. When I would start to focus on technique, my teachers would get upset. But if I didn't have the raw technique, I could never play the piece. I'm wondering now if the piece was too far outside what I could develop for technique in the time I would be working on the piece. I never did much work on voicing or articulation or dynamics... because I couldn't play the notes fast enough. And that's where things ended. Teachers upset that I dared to mention technical things a lot. Me, not happy with the performance of a piece and wondering what was up with my technique. Then I descended into this years-long search/exploration of technique. Which I've I think I've explored enough to know what's what. I haven't mastered everything, but I know how to develop more technique. There's no end to technique though and it's easy to let my routine go and just keep doing it without focusing on pushing things or having goals.
I think I've captured something here. My hands feel so creaky today, but I'm tired. I think my mind was hinting at the idea that these piece weren't going to give me much more for technique, not the raw speed type of technique. They could be useful for things like voicing and articulation, no problem in just getting fingers to the notes fast enough. And they're pieces that could be worked up fairly quickly.
And maybe there's something to the idea of banging out a more raw-technique-challenging piece. Drill it in for a month or so, then push it for speed for a time... which would probably be... may a week or so of careful pushing, followed by another week or so of recovery (heal, reset form, ease). That would be... mabye two months sitting on a piece. Although once it's drilled in, that piece could be used, just played through... maybe even with plain, raw repetitions... just to push technique. Add a variety of pieces and that's a different version of a technical routine -- tech routine with literature.
I suppose that's how the edge is too. It would just be shifting the focus of what I'm doing now.
Ah... Another idea that popped into my mind was to do some easier lit work along with a lighter version of my technical routine. That's another way to go. Or maybe... some kind of blend... Add a challenging tech piece and delete that part from the routine, replace that tech-focused part of my routine with an actual piece of music.
And... If learning itself is sloppy.... Then literature learning might be sloppy too. Time consuming and not quite the straight path that technique can be. But it IS the goal too, the point of improving technique.
Which all makes me wonder if maybe my previous teachers had a point when they assigned challenging pieces. It's just not very satisfying to not develop the technique required to actually finish the piece, or come up to an acceptable level of performance on a piece -- at least notes and rhythms at a tempo close to a performance tempo.