Last post wins!!!!!

[perfect_pitch]

Wesley Willis, please.  With a side order of Sorabji.

No one with half a brain listens to Wesley Willis...

No one with a brain at all listens to Sorabji.

[j_tour]

No one with half a brain listens to Wesley Willis...

No one with a brain at all listens to Sorabji.

You are a deeply disturbed individual.

Sor....how do you spell it...Skorabji?  I don't know,,,,some pommie.

Well, there's always room for differences in taste.  At least nobody important cares fir this pommie Englishman's music.  Not that I've heard of.

What, so he was kind of like Debussy or JC Moart, right?

No respect, I'm telling you.

So, he composed music, right?  Or something.  Kind of like a proto-Nancarrow.

Neve heard of him.

[perfect_pitch]

You are a deeply disturbed individual.

Sor....how do you spell it...Skorabji?  I don't know,,,,some pommie.

Damn... by the sounds of his name, I would never have suspected him to be English, but...

Trust an English guy to be some pompous pounce that comes up with idiotic music that no one cares about.

[j_tour]

Damn... by the sounds of his name, I would never have suspected him to be English, but...

Indeed he was.  And yes, "pompous pounce":  one of the better commercially available brands of catnip. 

Ask for it by name!  Where you work or bank!  Pompous Pounce.  For the finicky feline in your life!

[j_tour]

No one with half a brain listens to Wesley Willis...

Yes.  But does someone see.  There's a man.  On wing of the plane!   Playing Sorabji.  On the wing of the plane!

ETA Have you asked your doctor if midiatoring is right for you?  One out of one person claims it's a wholesome product.  Midiator some today, won't you?

Some restrictions may apply, not available in all states, consult your physician before Midiatoring, if you have signs of diarrhea, bloating, and generally being a bad musician discontinue use of Midiator.  Ask your physician about midiator today.  It's top number one!  No warrantees or guarantees expressed or implied, ask your physician about midiator today.

[perfect_pitch]

ETA Have you asked your doctor if midiatoring is right for you?  One out of one person claims it's a wholesome product.  Midiator some today, won't you?

Some restrictions may apply, not available in all states, consult your physician before Midiatoring, if you have signs of diarrhea, bloating, and generally being a bad musician discontinue use of Midiator.  Ask your physician about midiator today.  It's top number one!  No warrantees or guarantees expressed or implied, ask your physician about midiator today.

SERIOUSLY?  It's like a comedian who reuses the same material over and over - how long are you going to kick that dead horse?

Not only has it's heart stopped a long time ago, you kicked the poor thing to death, you've kicked so hard it's entrails are starting to spew out and the smell is unbearable.

Let the thing rest and try something new.

[j_tour]

Let the thing rest and try something new.

Why do you keep midiatoring yourself? 

Does this midiator you?  I'm not midiatoring you! 

Sounds to me like what we got here is someone who isn't ready for some midiatorball!

Give up.  Come on, man.  It's like a Richard Simmons infomercial.  It's the gift that keeps on giving.

[perfect_pitch]

Give up.  Come on, man.  It's like a Richard Simmons infomercial.  It's the gift that keeps on giving.

And who is Richard Simmons???

[j_tour]

And who is Richard Simmons???

I can't....explain....

Picture Paul Hogan wearing short-shorts and a muscle shirt exhorting (primarily) women to exercise and dance their bodies to health and care for themselves through diet.

In a very loud, exuberant fashion.

He's still around, I think.  He'd likely write back if you reached out to him.

ETA I know you're still mourning the loss of actor Neil Connery's weightlifting and folically-challenged brother, but here's a charming illustration of Mr. Simmons's gifts as a guru and entertainer.

[noparse]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a2u8mfR-yLI[/noparse]

[perfect_pitch]

[noparse]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a2u8mfR-yLI[/noparse]

Ohhhhh, you're getting as bad as Bob when it comes to embedding.

Just SHAMEFUL!!!

[j_tour]

Ohhhhh, you're getting as bad as Bob when it comes to embedding.

Just SHAMEFUL!!!

Indeed.  It's almost as though by including the non-functional tags "noparse" I didn't want the video to be embedded, since some youtube short clips owned by various corporate entities deliberately restrict the ability to display correctly when embedded.

I'm not sure.

Just a guess.

[Bob]

It's not me.  It's the site.  And it doesn't work with mp4's.

I think you two need to go argue on another thread and just leave this thread as it is now. 

Yeah.... I'm just going to close this thread right now.  Thread closed.  Everyone go home.

[j_tour]

It's not me.  It's the site.  And it doesn't work with mp4's.

I think you two need to go argue on another thread and just leave this thread as it is now. 

Yeah.... I'm just going to close this thread right now.  Thread closed.  Everyone go home.

Bob. 

Kindly Bob.  Clumsy Bob.  Friend of the animal kingdom Bob.

Kangaroo Jack didn't understand that sometimes people deliberately do not wish to embed images or videos, for various reasons.

But he's sorry and he knows why.  I don't expect a kangaroo-scrotum coin purse from him in the post ever, even though he knows such tokens would bring me great renown on the Pacific coast of North America. 

Bob.

Bob.

Bob.

I'm just going to have to suggest that you simmer down now. 

That's right.

Simmer down, now.

[perfect_pitch]

It's not me.  It's the site.  And it doesn't work with mp4's.

Sure Bob, sure.

Kangaroo Jack didn't understand that sometimes people deliberately do not wish to embed images or videos, for various reasons.

Who in the *** is Kangaroo Jack - I was born in Scotland, bitches. I don't even have an aussie accent - far from it.

You ain't getting a scrotum-purse because you're too damn lazy to hunt and make it yourself. It's like the ol' saying:

God helps those, who help themselves...
...but if you helped yourself, there's no need for God.

[j_tour]

blah blah blah something kangaroo scrotum blah blah pommie blah blah strine Sorabji bff blah blah

What is that, Ape Law or something, Dr. Zaius?



Here:  have a snack on me.

Yes, I know webp images don't render reliably inline here, always, but I'm not going to convert it to some inferior format.

Clink the link, hit the monkey with the hammer five times, and you'll be eligible to win a brand new midiator.

[perfect_pitch]

I know webp images don't render reliably inline here

Yes, they do... EXHIBIT A:

[j_tour]

Yes, they do... EXHIBIT A:

What?  I said a multisyllable word, vide licet, "reliably."

I know it's not a Joe Don Baker kind of word, but you can understand it.

I believe in you.

[perfect_pitch]

HOW IS THIS...

Not reliable???

[j_tour]

HOW IS THIS...

Not reliable???

I don't see anything.

There is no spoon.

[perfect_pitch]

Just because you can't see it, doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

I mean, you can't see our dear Lord and Saviour all around us - but he's there.   

[j_tour]

Just because you can't see it, doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

I mean, you can't see our dear Lord and Saviour all around us - but he's there.   

You bastard! 

Credo in unum Paul Hoganem, et in filium patris unigenitem ident.

THERE IS NO SPOON!!!!!!!!!!!!

[perfect_pitch]

You bastard! 

Credo in unum Paul Hoganem, et in filium patris unigenitem ident.

LATIN??? Who the hell speaks latin these days... HOW OLD ARE YOU!!!

I'm sorry, I mean...

How many celestial revolutions around yonder sun has ye been witness to?

[j_tour]

LATIN??? Who the hell speaks latin these days... HOW OLD ARE YOU!!!

I'm sorry, I mean...

How old would ye be?

Just as I thought. 

Welcome to America, Arnold Schwarzenegger!

Yeah. Actually, that may not have been correct Silver Age Latin, what I scrawled wrote, but Paul Hogan in sćcula sćculorum.

Yeah I was just listening to that The Led Who Zeppelin and remembered you were right. 

[perfect_pitch]

Yeah I was just listening to that The Led Who Zeppelin and remembered you were right. 

That's because I'm awesome. I'm SO glad you had the decency to admit I was right!!!

You realise this is something you can NEVER take back and will haunt you for years to come.

[j_tour]

That's because I'm awesome. I'm SO glad you had the decency to admit I was right!!!

You realise this is something you can NEVER take back and will haunt you for years to come.

There are so many things I cannot have ever taken back.

Und dennoch!

And that video, ladies and gentlemen, is how one learns how to recognize key-signatures  It's as easy as baking an n-based meal! 

[perfect_pitch]

Und dennoch!

I must say - I do like a good nnochi. Very delicious - love Italian pasta.

Not a fan of their carbonaras though.

[j_tour]

I must say - I do like a good nnochi. Very delicious - love Italian pasta.

I knew nnochi.  I served with nnochi.  I was friends with nnochi.  You, sir, are no nnochi!

[perfect_pitch]

Yes, I know. I said I liked nnochi... I didn't say I WAS nnochi.

You really need to develop your ability to read clearer J_Tour.

[j_tour]

Yes, I know. I said I liked nnochi... I didn't say I WAS nnochi.

You really need to develop your ability to read clearer J_Tour.

"Clearer"?  What?  Have you been listening to a lot of Chick Corea and getting into that whole John Travolta thing?

You better watch it, bud.  You're getting a little out there, man.

[perfect_pitch]

You better watch it, bud.  You're getting a little out there, man.

This coming from the man who ordered a side of Sorabji???

If I'm 'out there', then you're lost 'out there'.

Good luck finding your way back.

[j_tour]

If I'm 'out there', then you're lost 'out there'.

Good luck finding your way back.

Sorbajibeef.  It's the UK equivalent of what's for dinner.

I hear they feed the Sorabji beeves beer, and carefully massage their externally available muscles, just how they treat their finest sumo "athletes."

[perfect_pitch]

I hear they feed the Sorabji beeves beer, and carefully massage their externally available muscles, just how they treat their finest sumo "athletes."

Well... I can no longer unsee that image, nor unhear those words (in my head as I read them to myself).

How to get rid of the agony... OOOOH - a knife.

[j_tour]

How to get rid of the agony... OOOOH - a knife.

That's right:  carve into a nice Sorabjibeefsteak, and welcome to flavor country.

You won't regret it.  Remember:  always cut against the grain.  It tastes more tender and juicy that way.

[perfect_pitch]

That's right:  carve into a nice Sorabjibeefsteak

I can't stand his music... I doubt I'll like the taste.

[j_tour]

I can't stand his music... I doubt I'll like the taste.

The vocal cords are removed before butchering, and the head is separated from the torso.  The brain is not generally eaten, nor are the sweetbreads.

The hands and feet are always removed in the slaughtering process as well, of course, but are sometimes reserved for other uses.

The Sorabjibeeves are handled very well, especially in the final weeks before slaughtering.  The taste is exceptional, with excellent marbling.

I don't think you need worry about their "musical" qualities.  Inherently a rather "vocal" animal, we clip the vocal cords at birth, so that their vocalizations don't disturb the rest of the livestock.

[perfect_pitch]

The vocal cords are removed before butchering, and the head is separated from the torso.  The brain is not generally eaten, nor are the sweetbreads.

The hands and feet are always removed in the slaughtering process as well, of course, but are sometimes reserved for other uses.

The Sorabjibeeves are handled very well, especially in the final weeks before slaughtering.  The taste is exceptional, with excellent marbling.

I don't think you need worry about their "musical" qualities.  Inherently a rather "vocal" animal, we clip the vocal cords at birth, so that their vocalizations don't disturb the rest of the livestock.

Given how creative that response is, I'm not sure whether to be impressed...

...or deeply scared of you.

[outin]

You people have become really boring recently...I'll rather go listen to some Sorabji

I'll be back to win when you have all bored each other to death.

[j_tour]

You people have become really boring recently...I'll rather go listen to some Sorabji

When did you first begin your campaign of murderous slaughter?  And was there ever a time you thought you should stop?

Classic petitio principii for a fancy person like you.

And here's a joke.

How do you keep a pianist busy all day?
Click here

[perfect_pitch]

How do you keep a pianist busy all day?

Change his Netflix password? Confiscate the power supply to his laptop/computer?

[j_tour]

Change his Netflix password? Confiscate the power supply to his laptop/computer?

The correct answer is to ask him or her how many Sorabjis it takes to wallpaper a large room.

[perfect_pitch]

That's easy - 0. There should NEVER be any Sorabji's at all.

Like literally 0. Hell, even -1 Sorabji's is still too many.

[Bob]

[j_tour]

That's easy - 0. There should NEVER be any Sorabji's at all.

Like literally 0. Hell, even -1 Sorabji's is still too many.

Don't be a jerk.

The answer is one, if you slice it thinly enough.

[perfect_pitch]

I'll be a jerk if I want to... anonymity protects me.

[j_tour]

I'll be a jerk if I want to... anonymity protects me.

Sure, whatever.  Pretending that you believe yourself to be a Phantom Marauder while on criminal trials under the supervision of your Queen for having consumed and eaten some score of human corpses is not much of a defense.

I think the Crown Prosecutor has better plans for you. 

Sorabji plans.

Your monarch has seen to that.

But I wouldn't know:  I'm drinking Jameson triple-distilled, which is not under the oversight of your Queen Mum.

[perfect_pitch]

which is not under the oversight of your Queen Mum.

SCOTTISH!!! Which part of that do you not understand. We don't consider the queen the ruler of our country.

This beautiful b!tch:



is smart, witty and actually has a brain... unlike some other sorry-arse numpty bastards who seem to be nothing more than a blithering idiot.

[j_tour]

SCOTTISH!!! Which part of that do you not understand. We don't consider the queen the ruler of our country.

You have no respect for your reigning monarch, neither in Scotland nor in Australia.

I find that treasonable.  A hanging offense.

[perfect_pitch]

I find that treasonable.  A hanging offense.

They don't hang people in Britain or in Australia.

Maybe they did in your century day, but not today. You ARE living in the past.

[Bob]

*Bob considers finding a "That's a man baby!" gif or making a comment about royals inbreding but doesn't want to get hanged.*   



Hello.  Nice day, isn't it?

[perfect_pitch]

Well it's 36 degrees celsius here in Australia, and it's too bloody hot.

Although our Premier did give us a freebie of $600 towards our next power bills to thank us for behaving while we suppress COVID here in WA.