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Praise everything mentality (Read 6857 times)

Offline brogers70

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Re: Praise everything mentality
«Reply #50 on: December 23, 2013, 10:01:20 PM »
For young children, too much praise is harmful, I think, because it trains the student to look for approval outside himself/herself. Instead of a lot of praise, I think it's better to ask the child how he liked what he just did, what he liked about it, if there was anything he didn't like about it, etc. Neither praise nor criticism, just friendly investigation with the student.


Offline timothy42b

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Re: Praise everything mentality
«Reply #51 on: December 24, 2013, 01:38:11 PM »
. Instead of a lot of praise, I think it's better to ask the child how he liked what he just did, what he liked about it, if there was anything he didn't like about it, etc.


Careful here.  Young children are not very verbal.  Forcing them to answer questions is likely to be frustrating for both parties.
Tim

Offline brogers70

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Re: Praise everything mentality
«Reply #52 on: December 24, 2013, 04:48:24 PM »
Depends on age. They're more verbal than you might think. It's not frustrating at all, and there's no forcing involved.

Offline timothy42b

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Re: Praise everything mentality
«Reply #53 on: December 24, 2013, 05:41:19 PM »
Depends on age. They're more verbal than you might think. It's not frustrating at all, and there's no forcing involved.

So you've never heard "I dunno?" 

I suspect many teachers would be shocked to know how much time they waste talking themselves.  It isn't a bad idea to video yourself occasionally.  And while counting your words, watch the child to see when you've lost them.  It happens faster than you'd think. 
Tim

Offline brogers70

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Re: Praise everything mentality
«Reply #54 on: December 24, 2013, 09:11:31 PM »
So you've never heard "I dunno?" 

I suspect many teachers would be shocked to know how much time they waste talking themselves.  It isn't a bad idea to video yourself occasionally.  And while counting your words, watch the child to see when you've lost them.  It happens faster than you'd think. 

Sure, you can talk uselessly and lose a kid. The better you are at talking to and listening to kids, though, the less you'll hear "I dunno" and the more you'll be surprised at how much is going on in their heads and how verbal about it they can be. It's a learned skill. My wife is a Montessori teacher and she can elicit all sorts of interesting thoughts and discussion from very young kids who would just give a shrug and an "I dunno" to most adults. Kids are more verbal and thoughtful than they usually get credit for.

Offline timothy42b

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Re: Praise everything mentality
«Reply #55 on: December 25, 2013, 06:33:35 PM »
Sure, you can talk uselessly and lose a kid.

I would suggest it's nearly 100% likely that you do this regularly, UNLESS you've video'd enough of your teaching to improve it, or have had an observer sit in and help you with it. 

I'd rather not encourage a child to be verbal while learning an artistic or athletic skill like a musical instrument.  It adds an adult layer between the action and the child's preferred (and very superior) learning modes. 
Tim

Offline keypeg

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Re: Praise everything mentality
«Reply #56 on: December 27, 2013, 01:17:17 AM »
  And while counting your words, watch the child to see when you've lost them.  It happens faster than you'd think. 
Not just a child.  At any age, if you are learning a new skill, you need to concentrate on only a very few things.

Offline cabbynum

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Re: Praise everything mentality
«Reply #57 on: December 27, 2013, 03:07:59 AM »
I have students from 6-14

I have found that if you keep the setting casual but keep yourself in control you get good results. If you can get the student to respect you and like you then you're golden. I have 6 that are that way with me. They have very productive lessons. They try to impress me by working hard and don't wanna let me down. So we are flying through the lesson books with them and we have discussions about the music. I also allow a bit of time for each student to talk about about their personal life. I never let the talking take too long though.

One student has no interest in piano and doesn't see the use of it. He is a pain to teach. You have to keep things light and keep them entertained it's easier to sneak in a lesson there.
Currently Working on
Liszt Sonata B minor
Dante Sonata
Vallee d'Obermann
Invocation

Offline elizasays

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Re: Praise everything mentality
«Reply #58 on: January 21, 2014, 09:17:59 AM »
I found your post interesting to read. I teach the piano, and quite often get students with musical ability, who come from families that do not even listen to music. The parents of students I get often do not understand what learning the piano, or any musical instrument, for that matter involves. Even with kids from musical families, the pressure of studies here in India is quite heavy, and students need their school, college and post graduate results to be good, to get anywhere career-wise when they grow up. Even children who may eventually choose a career in music in Mumbai, need to do well in studies to keep their options open. Many of my students come from families where both parents work, and parents sometimes have very long commutes here in Mumbai. So teaching, for me is very different from the kind of teaching you describe.
Children need time for school, coaching classes (cos the percentage to get into a college or post graduate course are very very high), piano practise and still get time to relax. Parents often are the main motivating factor, as a lot of schools do not have regular music classes or activities.
Teachers here in Mumbai struggle with very basic stuff. I've started blogging my teaching techniques, so my students and parents can read them. You will definitely find it very very different from the way you learned.
I do agree with you though. Children need honest feedback, and only what is good should be praised. When a child is trying very hard, that effort too should be noticed and praised. I feel very strongly, that when a child does not do well, and the teacher needs to point it out, this should be done in a tactful and caring manner, so that the child accepts it and moves forward.
At the end of the day, it is important to me that my students go to the piano for fun.
Anitaelise

Offline kakeithewolf

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Re: Praise everything mentality
«Reply #59 on: January 25, 2014, 06:31:27 PM »
Truth be told, blunt honest truth is a milliard times better than comforting lies. Sparing self-esteem and feelings doesn't better a person; it only keeps them cocooned in the illusion that they do no wrong in their works, whatever those works may be.

Sure, for the young, criticism usually isn't taken so well, but I can say from experience that a little honesty in the earlier years goes a long way in later life. Were I not given a particular criticism for a certain work about 11 years ago, I would not have made what I consider to be my best work. Criticism may not be pleasant, but it betters people.
Per novitatem, artium est renascatur.

Finished with making music for quite a long time.

Offline Mayla

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Re: Praise everything mentality
«Reply #60 on: January 30, 2014, 06:45:19 PM »
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"The greatest thing in this world is not so much where we are, but in what direction we are moving"  ~Oliver Wendell Holmes