Did your parents beat you when you were a kid?

[rachmaninoff_forever]

I was talking to a friend of mine and she was completely horrified that I was beat when I was a kid.  

Umm...

It's called being a parent and raising your freaking kids!  Is a completely normal ass thing to do!  

My dad would beat me with a beat WHENEVER I did something bad!  Sometimes we would get beatings just in case!

Up until 5th grade, my mom would meet with my teachers the first day of school and tell them to beat me if I acted up.

You act up at a friends house, you're getting your ass beat by your friends mom (your mom would call her and tell her to beat your ass if you were acting up).  And then when you get home, you're getting your ass beat again for getting your ass beat at your friends house.

If you cry while you're getting your ass beat, then you're getting your ass beat some more.

If after you get your ass beat you have an attitude, you're getting your ass beat.

If you slam the door, you're getting your ass beat.

If you're fighting with your brother, you both get your ass beat.

If you had bad grades, you're getting your ass beat.

You say you hate your parents, you're getting your ass beat.

I had a studdering problem.  Whenever I studdered, I got my ass beat.

You got your ass beat by a bully in school, your parents would tell you to go back and beat his ass.






And then when You're old enough to know about DCFS, you would threaten to call them but your mom would be like, 'Wanna live with strangers?  Go on ahead, call them' and then you would feels salty so you didn't do anything.

[j_menz]

That was pretty normal when I was a kid. I, however, was always a perfect angel so escaped.

[ted]

No, never beaten, that is far too strong a word. I received a single smack on no more than four or five occasions I can remember, when I was exceedingly naughty.

[Bob]

Spanked, but not beaten.  I remember the day when I realized that didn't hurt.  Then I got grounded. 

I think the general thinking is that the kid needs to make up their own mind and control their own behavior.   I forget exactly what it is, but physical violence is supposed to lower creativity/daringness and raise the possibility violence. 

From what I've seen myself, there has to be a line that's not crossed.  After that, whatever needs to be done to prevent a kid from doing something negative.  The negatives at that level would just lead to an even more negative situation.  For whatever reason, some kids just continue to act out until they're stopped, which may be the point.  When it's the level that the kid is going to end up in jail soon or is going to get kicked out school, that's when there's go to be something more.  Even before that though, in school, when a kid is having a negative effect on everyone else, that's a big issue too.  One apple spoils the bunch, but there's a limit to that too. When it's if the apple gets removed, it's bunch.  I've situations where I've been stuck adjusting the curriculum for the entire school because of a few kids.  It's not right.  It would actually be better if those kids weren't there.

[chopin2015]

yes, and standing in a corner or timeout. if you sit down, then it didn't count...

[swagmaster420x]

I was talking to a friend of mine and she was completely horrified that I was beat when I was a kid.  

Umm...

It's called being a parent and raising your freaking kids!  Is a completely normal ass thing to do!  

My dad would beat me with a beat WHENEVER I did something bad!  Sometimes we would get beatings just in case!

Up until 5th grade, my mom would meet with my teachers the first day of school and tell them to beat me if I acted up.

You act up at a friends house, you're getting your ass beat by your friends mom (your mom would call her and tell her to beat your ass if you were acting up).  And then when you get home, you're getting your ass beat again for getting your ass beat at your friends house.

If you cry while you're getting your ass beat, then you're getting your ass beat some more.

If after you get your ass beat you have an attitude, you're getting your ass beat.

If you slam the door, you're getting your ass beat.

If you're fighting with your brother, you both get your ass beat.

If you had bad grades, you're getting your ass beat.

You say you hate your parents, you're getting your ass beat.

I had a studdering problem.  Whenever I studdered, I got my ass beat.

You got your ass beat by a bully in school, your parents would tell you to go back and beat his ass.






And then when You're old enough to know about DCFS, you would threaten to call them but your mom would be like, 'Wanna live with strangers?  Go on ahead, call them' and then you would feels salty so you didn't do anything.

You misspelled stutter, is it time for a beating? Zzz

[emill]

 

That was pretty normal when I was a kid. I, however, was always a perfect angel so escaped.  

Really??!!??   you must be like ....  ||
                                                 ||
                                                 ||
                                               \\  //  
                                                 \ /

[j_menz]

 Really??!!??   you must be like ....

Rather less blue. And the smile is not so cheesy.

[emill]

Like so ....? 

[j_menz]

Like so ....? 

Not so much the frock.

[outin]

I never got caught for anything I did...with maybe a couple of exceptions. I remember my mother tried to spank me once, but it didn't work that well, so it never happened again

I started from a rather early age to work on crushing my parents' authority and was quite successful in that. Poor things...

R4, I am not sure your parent's way is the best way to raise an average kid.

[emill]

R4, I am not sure your parent's way is the best way to raise an average kid.

he is NOT average, remember he is RACH4 !!! ... that is why he gets BEAT!

[lostinidlewonder]

They used to beat me at a lot of things, but now I beat them.

[swagmaster420x]

my mom's cousin (in china...) once was beat by his dad with an iron pole. broken bone resulted. not making this up.

[theholygideons]

my mom's cousin (in china...) once was beat by his dad with an iron pole. broken bone resulted. not making this up.

In china the coaches beat their athletes. 
anyways,

@rach_4ever, how was Dominican republic? did you get some action?

[faulty_damper]

Research on beating kids, even spanking, is bad.  Don't do it.  Look at the Samoans who believe beating kids are doing them good.  Those kids are messed up.  The adults, too.  50% of Samoans beat their kids, their wives, each other.  It's related to their war-like culture.

[theholygideons]

Research on beating kids, even spanking, is bad.  Don't do it.  Look at the Samoans who believe beating kids are doing them good.  Those kids are messed up.  The adults, too.  50% of Samoans beat their kids, their wives, each other.  It's related to their war-like culture.

Correlation does not imply causation... what is with these racist generalisations. You can't blame them, really, it's what keeps them in shape.   

[quantum]

Absolutely not normal.  That is unless parents like to be front page of the newspaper and 6 o'clock news material. 

I started from a rather early age to work on crushing my parents' authority and was quite successful in that.

A commendable course of action indeed!

[starlady]

They shouldn't have punished you for stuttering (or even for studdering); that's not fair, and is counterproductive.

  Otherwise, they sound like my kind of parent   

But now YOU have to tell US about the Dominican! Did you find true love?  --s.

[theholygideons]

yeah rachy, who was your elise? play to us the suite you composed while being there.

[rachmaninoff_forever]

Research on beating kids, even spanking, is bad.  Don't do it. 

PSSSSSSHHH!!!!!!!

[rachmaninoff_forever]

What the heck is all this talk about the DR?

I'm going in June.

[rachmaninoff_forever]

That was pretty normal when I was a kid. I, however, was always a perfect angel so escaped.

Or maybe you were the perfect after you got beat the first few times.

[j_menz]

PSSSSSSHHH!!!!!!!

You've developed a leak? 

Or maybe you were the perfect after you got beat the first few times.

Nope. I was born that way.

[rachmaninoff_forever]

Absolutely not normal.  That is unless parents like to be front page of the newspaper and 6 o'clock news material. 

Actually that was pretty normal when I was a kid.  

[chopinfrederic]

Yes. But not on the ass.

[quantum]

Actually that was pretty normal when I was a kid.  

It was a normal occurrence to see child abuse stories in the news? 

[rachmaninoff_forever]

It was a normal occurrence to see child abuse stories in the news?  

That's not child abuse.

It would be different if you stuck your kid in the face and gave him a black eye or something.

No but yeah, they would be like...

kid:  I'm calling DCFS!

Mom:  Go ahead!  Wanna live with strangers?  Here's the phone.

Kid:  ...

[deidre]

I was spanked severely as a kid and today, it would be considered abuse. I love my parents, but they were doing what they experienced as kids, on their own kids. Someone along the way needs to break that cycle because to me, laying hands on a kid to get them to be compliant is lazy and irresponsible. Imagine if we went to work and our employers hit us if we were late or made mistakes. Lol The lawsuits would be staggering. So, why are kids shown less respect than adults? If an adult hits me, it's assault and against the law but if a parent hits a kid, it's "discipline?" Um, ok. Why do we presume kids don't understand reasoning and consequences.

Most people who end up in prison, were beat as kids. Goes to show, if all you do is teach kids to fear punishment for a wrong doing, they will grow up not understanding consequences to their actions and learning how to make appropriate decisions. They will do just enough to not get in trouble or they will adhere to the laws out of fear.

Kids deserve to be taught right from wrong through words, not violence. Violence begets violence. It will never mold a kid into a responsible adult but rather, it will teach then to obey and be responsible out of fear.

Time to create a new normal.

[deidre]

And to those here saying it wasn't abuse to be occasionally "spanked" or "smacked," I'd agree that it might not always classify as abuse per se, but it still wasn't right. Do you smack people in your life who don't listen to you or make mistakes? No, you most likely don't. Lets hope you don't.

Because why? Because it is wrong and er illegal to hit others. But somewhere along the way, hitting kids became justifiable under the terms "corporal punishment" and "discipline."

Nah, put lipstick on a pig, it is still a pig.  

Violence, no matter what words we use to decorate it or diminish the harshness of it, is still violence.
And it solves nothing and installs fear in the recipient.

[littletune]

I agree with Deidre! I don't think it does any good to beat kids! I did get slapped just a few times (like 3 to 5 in my whole life till now) acros my face or hands or mouth. But that's just cause my parents lost their nerves cause sometimes I can be kinda stubborn and start yelling or talking back. My dad looks like he's going to slap me a lot of times but when I'm very angry I don't even care! I start yelling even more. I don't know what would happen if my parents were beating me, I think they would have to beat me to death or at least until I was unconscious... I don't know.
Even though sometimes I have been thinking if maybe getting beaten would be easier than having to listen to hours and hours of talks over and over again about how you're a bad kid and how your parents are working so hard and you're not doing what you should be doing the way you should be doing and making them sad and embarrassed (and I know my dad doesn't mean anything bad, he just doesn't know at all how bad his talks can hurt and he doesn't know what else to do).

But I really don't get the idea about scaring someone into being good or doing the right thing... maybe it can seem to work for a while but if you want to teach someone how to do the right thing you have to show them how to think for themselves and how to know what's right and what's wrong, not just doing something so they don't get punished.

[malaguena]

I agree with Deidre! I don't think it does any good to beat kids! I did get slapped just a few times (like 3 to 5 in my whole life till now) acros my face or hands or mouth. But that's just cause my parents lost their nerves cause sometimes I can be kinda stubborn and start yelling or talking back. My dad looks like he's going to slap me a lot of times but when I'm very angry I don't even care! I start yelling even more. I don't know what would happen if my parents were beating me, I think they would have to beat me to death or at least until I was unconscious... I don't know.
Even though sometimes I have been thinking if maybe getting beaten would be easier than having to listen to hours and hours of talks over and over again about how you're a bad kid and how your parents are working so hard and you're not doing what you should be doing the way you should be doing and making them sad and embarrassed (and I know my dad doesn't mean anything bad, he just doesn't know at all how bad his talks can hurt and he doesn't know what else to do).

But I really don't get the idea about scaring someone into being good or doing the right thing... maybe it can seem to work for a while but if you want to teach someone how to do the right thing you have to show them how to think for themselves and how to know what's right and what's wrong, not just doing something so they don't get punished.

Well I think you need a lot more than a spanking, especially if you're willing to yell in his face.

Perhaps if they had spanked you, you'd have more respect for adults, especially your parents, and be thankful for what you actually have.

Geez.

[quantum]

Violence, no matter what words we use to decorate it or diminish the harshness of it, is still violence.

Exactly.  IMO, any form of physical punishment, whether the child "deserved it" or not, no matter the intensity of the physical blow, is child abuse.  Plain and simple, no dressing it up and painting it over, it is child abuse.  

No but yeah, they would be like...

kid:  I'm calling DCFS!

Mom:  Go ahead!  Wanna live with strangers?  Here's the phone.

Kid:  ...

Just saying, if I were the child that had been assaulted I'd take the phone and make the call in front of my parents.  

[emill]

WOW ... some of you can be so judgemental.

A son of mine @ 7 years old gets hold of my cp while I was bathing and "threatens" to throw it out of the window thinking perhaps that it will take flight. His dad tries to reason that it will not fly but instead will be broken when it lands on the cement below. The exchange goes on for several minutes, however the kid goes ahead and throws it out!!  No more explanations!!!  HE GETS A GOOD SPANKING from his dad!

My grandson @ 8 years is often reminded NOT TO PLAY basketball in the living room (mainly passing the ball and dribbling) as he has broken a few inexpensive things in the past (no spanking so far). As I was about to go to work, I saw him about to do it again and told him to play outside, since there is a full court in our village.  When I came back from work ... lo and behold, the plasma TV had a crack in the screen.  He definitely got a spanking without further explanation.

NO TV on weekdays and the internet is limited as an aid to assignments. However if they finish early, they can have TV or the internet but must be in bed before midnight.  "Violations" do not result in spanking .... but if done repeatedly and successively .... NO MORE EXPLANATIONS required ... a spanking is a must ... and they know that!!!

I am sure my children do not love us less because they were spanked. They know that it was only done when they became excessively and repeatedly naughty. Their respect for elders and authority remain good and undiminished.  

Many westerners view spanking as violence, but many orientals consider it as part of the process of discipline.  We try to avoid using it; instead we reason a lot, cajole and reward good behaviour. But there are occasions that a child just repeatedly does the same things over and over again as if it if does not matter. A good spanking is in order and is a much better reminder against bad behaviour.

Let us not be judgemental ... perhaps when you are in your 60s or 70s .. and your children are successful and with families too ... you may perhaps say - I am proud of my children ... never had to spank them.  BUT before that, especially if you do not even have kids or a family of your own ....  any sweeping statement will have much less weight for the simple reason that the pudding has yet to be tasted.

 RACH4 --- I like your "ass-beating" PARENTS!!!      You were probably so naughty and bull-headed as a kid !!!!  Do you love them less??  The only thing I would probably disagree with was the action towards your "stuttering".  But you got cured!!  hehahha


  

  

[diwang99]

Occassionally, I would get beaten about 5 times a year.

[deidre]

WOW ... some of you can be so judgemental.

A son of mine @ 7 years old gets hold of my cp while I was bathing and "threatens" to throw it out of the window thinking perhaps that it will take flight. His dad tries to reason that it will not fly but instead will be broken when it lands on the cement below. The exchange goes on for several minutes, however the kid goes ahead and throws it out!!  No more explanations!!!  HE GETS A GOOD SPANKING from his dad!

My grandson @ 8 years is often reminded NOT TO PLAY basketball in the living room (mainly passing the ball and dribbling) as he has broken a few inexpensive things in the past (no spanking so far). As I was about to go to work, I saw him about to do it again and told him to play outside, since there is a full court in our village.  When I came back from work ... lo and behold, the plasma TV had a crack in the screen.  He definitely got a spanking without further explanation.

NO TV on weekdays and the internet is limited as an aid to assignments. However if they finish early, they can have TV or the internet but must be in bed before midnight.  "Violations" do not result in spanking .... but if done repeatedly and successively .... NO MORE EXPLANATIONS required ... a spanking is a must ... and they know that!!!

I am sure my children do not love us less because they were spanked. They know that it was only done when they became excessively and repeatedly naughty. Their respect for elders and authority remain good and undiminished.  

Many westerners view spanking as violence, but many orientals consider it as part of the process of discipline.  We try to avoid using it; instead we reason a lot, cajole and reward good behaviour. But there are occasions that a child just repeatedly does the same things over and over again as if it if does not matter. A good spanking is in order and is a much better reminder against bad behaviour.

Let us not be judgemental ... perhaps when you are in your 60s or 70s .. and your children are successful and with families too ... you may perhaps say - I am proud of my children ... never had to spank them.  BUT before that, especially if you do not even have kids or a family of your own ....  any sweeping statement will have much less weight for the simple reason that the pudding has yet to be tasted.

 RACH4 --- I like your "ass-beating" PARENTS!!!      You were probably so naughty and bull-headed as a kid !!!!  Do you love them less??  The only thing I would probably disagree with was the action towards your "stuttering".  But you got cured!!  hehahha


  

  

"Westerners" hit their kids too. It's wrong whether you live in China or you live in the US. It's wrong. It breeds fear and doesn't teach anything to the child except to fear consequences instead of teaching a kid through a number of alternative ways, why not to do something wrong.

Spanking, smacking, hitting...all lazy ways to gain compliance. Reasoning with a kid, and coming up with more constructive forms of punishment takes more  time on the part of the parent.

Whacking a kid takes no thought and is not teaching the kid anything. Which is why kids who are spanked are often bullies in school, and hit others when they don't get their way.

Gee where did they learn that from? lol

I don't classify all spankings as abuse but I think in all cases, kids deserve more respect than to be spanked/hit as a form of discipline.

Imagine if your piano teachers hit you when you don't learn a piece, at the speed they wish. Lol
If you wouldn't hit an adult why hit a kid?

[outin]

Seriously...For most children rare occasions of smacking is ok, it won't do any permanent damage. But it can also breed violence and people who have done violent crimes have often been physically punished and abused as children. It's hard to know what the effects of physical punishment will be because it depends on so many factors: The temperament of the child, the overall environment (which can never be fully controlled by the parents) and possibly emerging personality disorders. It's very difficult to know when something starts getting abusive from the viewpoint of the child. Unless one is willing to risk raising an abuser or a violent psychopath, it would be safer to stick to other forms of discipline. Some children will need to be restrained physically, but hitting is not really necessary.

But I do not blame those parents who lose their temper and cannot help it, children can be such a pain...

[deidre]

Seriously...For most children rare occasions of smacking is ok, it won't do any permanent damage. But it can also breed violence and people who have done violent crimes have often been physically punished and abused as children. It's hard to know what the effects of physical punishment will be because it depends on so many factors: The temperament of the child, the overall environment (which can never be fully controlled by the parents) and possibly emerging personality disorders. It's very difficult to know when something starts getting abusive from the viewpoint of the child. Unless one is willing to risk raising an abuser or a violent psychopath, it would be safer to stick to other forms of discipline. Some children will need to be restrained physically, but hitting is not really necessary.

But I do not blame those parents who lose their temper and cannot help it, children can be such a pain...

I agree, this is very well stated. Laughing at 'kids can be such a pain.'' (I know I was)
But, spanking...looking back...didn't deter me from continuing to do the same thing again. When my parents would actually sit me down and reason with me, is when the most valuable lessons came into play.

I don't judge anyone who spanks, I just don't find it necessary, as there are other means of disciplining kids and teaching right vs. wrong.

[littletune]

Well I think you need a lot more than a spanking, especially if you're willing to yell in his face.

Perhaps if they had spanked you, you'd have more respect for adults, especially your parents, and be thankful for what you actually have.

Geez.

What would "a lot more than spanking" be? 

I know that yelling at someone is not a good thing! I am not exactly proud of yelling and saying mean things... I know it doesn't do any good and it hurts people which in the end hurts me, because it hurts me to hurt others. I don't get so angry often. I don't get angry very quickly, but when I do I really do. And I never feel good about it. I'm learning, I make mistakes. I have to learn how not to get hurt by other people and how to talk about things rather than try to hurt them back. But I would definitely not learn how to talk about things and how to not get angry if my parents were beating me!
And I have a lot of respect for others, real respect, not fear. Beating someone into "respecting" you isn't exactly respect.

I wanted to say a few more things about parents beating (or spanking) their kids, but now I don't know if I should, because I don't want Emill to think I'm judging what he does or something. Because I really do respect him! I think he's a very good person and I'm sure his kids know that too, even if he spanks them sometimes.
I don't know... maybe it's not so much about spanking or not, but more about understanding why someone is doing what they're doing. We're all human, we don't know exactly what is the best thing to do, we just try to do the best we can. And if you know for sure that your parents love you and that they are doing what they are doing because they want all the best for you then you can be ok with whatever they're doing (as long as they don't injure you or kill you, of course).
I mean my parents have hit me a few times and it never changed the way I feel about them. My mum once even slapped me so hard acros my mouth, my lip started bleeding! Well... the truth is that a few days before that I bumped into my friend's head at school. And my lip started bleeding a lot, the teachers even wanted to take me to a doctor cause it didn't stop bleeding for such a long time. And so a few days later my mum was late for work (as usual  ) and she was combing my hair and she wasn't very gentle cause she tried to do it as fast as possible so I started yelling, so she got angry and told me she would slap me if I didn't stop and I got even more angry cause I didn't think it was fair so I talked back and she slapped me and I yelled even more so she slapped me again in exactly the place where my lip was already hurt so it started bleeding and then of course I made a big deal about how she injured me and she apologized and felt kinda bad about it and I liked that so I kept crying and making a big deal out of it and feeling sorry for myself and then she had enough and got angry again and told me to stop exaggerating and then I started feeling kinda stupid about it and I started making fun of myself pretending to be in pain and crying like a little baby and then we both started laughing and that was that. I learned really a lot of things and of course it didn't change anything about how I felt about my mum. I still think my mum is the best mum anyone could ever have! Well actually I am sure of that! 

I totaly understand that parents are just human and that their kids can sometimes make them so angry that they hit them or spank them. But I don't think that hitting or beating or spanking really helps kids to become better people, to become the best themselves they can be. Because if you keep getting hit or spanked for everything you do without even talking about it, all you learn is that you should do and say whatever someone who's more powerful than you tells you to and that you can get others to do what you want if you're strong enough and use violence to scare them into doing what you want. And of course you learn how to hide and cheat and pretend to look as if you're doing the right thing when you're really doing something else. You also don't learn to respect others but just how to pretend to respect others when they're more powerful than you are.
I don't think that getting hit or spanked by your parents from time to time is a big deal, but I also don't think that hitting or spanking helps to raise better, more respectful and nicer people. I mean people have been beating their kids for centuries and look at what kind of world we have. Not very peaceful and respectful I would say.
But of course it's never just about this one thing...you have to look at many things. I'm sure that it's much worse to have parents who never hit you or spank you but also don't care about you at all than to have parents who love you a lot but sometimes get so angry that they hit you or spank you. I guess it's all about the reasons for why someone is doing what they're doing and understanding those reasons. 

[librarypatron]

I was whipped with my Fathers Cowboy belt and had welts for weeks.  I had my jaw broken after my Dad sucker punched me.  Same thing different year except it was a broken nose.  My Mom would hit me with a heavy stainless spoon. All of the above were done because they thought I was doing drugs when in reality we were playing stickball - street baseball. I had to be home when the street lights went on.
If I was a few minutes late because game ran long - I was beaten when I got home. This started when I was 12 to 18 years old.  At 18 I moved into a young divorcee's apartment and learned what women liked.  I never moved back or kept in touch with my dysfunctional parents. I'm 53 and married to a stunning wife and have been blessed with twin sons that we talk to about right and wrong behavior.
Neither my wife or myself have ever hit them and we have a stable, loving home.  They started piano at 4, are purple belts in Karate, and are high honor A+ students.  They are very tall also so nobody tries to kick their ass.  My life went from a horror show to one filled with love and respect.

[swagmaster420x]

I was whipped with my Fathers Cowboy belt and had welts for weeks.  I had my jaw broken after my Dad sucker punched me.  Same thing different year except it was a broken nose.  My Mom would hit me with a heavy stainless spoon. All of the above were done because they thought I was doing drugs when in reality we were playing stickball - street baseball. I had to be home when the street lights went on.
If I was a few minutes late because game ran long - I was beaten when I got home. This started when I was 12 to 18 years old.  At 18 I moved into a young divorcee's apartment and learned what women liked.  I never moved back or kept in touch with my dysfunctional parents. I'm 53 and married to a stunning wife and have been blessed with twin sons that we talk to about right and wrong behavior.
Neither my wife or myself have ever hit them and we have a stable, loving home.  They started piano at 4, are purple belts in Karate, and are high honor A+ students.  They are very tall also so nobody tries to kick their ass.  My life went from a horror show to one filled with love and respect.

soo... whats your general opinion about beatings

[g_s_223]

If someone has major on-going issues about their parents (or step-parents etc) I'd recommend the Hoffman Process, which is a short residential course allowing you to really get to the bottom of these issues and comprehensively work them out. It's not for everyone, but for those for whom it is appropriate, it is genuinely transformational.

[emill]

What would "a lot more than spanking" be? 

I wanted to say a few more things about parents beating (or spanking) their kids, but now I don't know if I should, because I don't want Emill to think I'm judging what he does or something. Because I really do respect him! I think he's a very good person and I'm sure his kids know that too, even if he spanks them sometimes.

I mean my parents have hit me a few times and it never changed the way I feel about them. My mum once even slapped me so hard across my mouth, my lip started bleeding! Well... the truth is that a few days before that I bumped into my friend's head at school. And my lip started bleeding a lot, the teachers even wanted to take me to a doctor cause it didn't stop bleeding for such a long time. And so a few days later my mum was late for work (as usual  ) and she was combing my hair and she wasn't very gentle cause she tried to do it as fast as possible so I started yelling, so she got angry and told me she would slap me if I didn't stop and I got even more angry cause I didn't think it was fair so I talked back and she slapped me and I yelled even more so she slapped me again in exactly the place where my lip was already hurt so it started bleeding and then of course I made a big deal about how she injured me and she apologized and felt kinda bad about it and I liked that so I kept crying and making a big deal out of it and feeling sorry for myself ............  

YOU devilish teen!!!!   not so good behaviour!!... tsk..tsk..tsk..tsk 
Thanks for what you said .... I have always admired not only your depth of understanding of the English language, but more so of human situations. You are an atypical teen when it comes to those. No worries at all ...  your post is well taken.

[rachmaninoff_forever]

. Do you smack people in your life who don't listen to you or make mistakes? No, you most likely don't. Lets hope you don't.

Violence, no matter what words we use to decorate it or diminish the harshness of it, is still violence.
And it solves nothing and installs fear in the recipient.

I'm not gonna hang out with someone who doesn't behave normally.

I'm not saying that it isn't violent.  And YES it does solve problems!  Suppose someone's *** with you in school.  What are you gonna do?  Tell your teacher?  Nah bro that sh*t doesn't work.  Tell him to stop *** with you first, and if he doesn't stop, kick his ass.  That'll make him afraid of you and he'll stop.  You wanna make him afraid of you!

Like how you teach your kids to be afraid of the consequences of doing something bad.  It's just classical conditioning.  

Oh dang, I better not talk back to my parents, I'll get beat.  

*20 years later...*

Oh dang, I better not go against authority, I'll get locked up.

All of my family and *most* of my friends were raised this way and they're like normal ass people.


Just for the record when I grew up, beating and spankings were the same thing.  

[outin]

*20 years later...*

Oh dang, I better not go against authority, I'll get locked up.

This worries me...to ever achieve anything in life and avoid accepting every stupidity/conservative idea imposed on you by the so called authorities, you must be able to go against them. You won't end the world just because someone tells you to, do you? You do it when YOU know it's the right time!

[swagmaster420x]

I'm not gonna hang out with someone who doesn't have normal behavior.

I'm not saying that it isn't violent.  And YES it does solve problems!  Suppose someone's *** with you in school.  What are you gonna do?  Tell your teacher?  Nah bro that sh*t doesn't work.  Tell him to stop *** with you first, and if he doesn't stop, kick his ass.  That'll make him afraid of you and he'll stop.  You wanna make him afraid of you!

Like how you teach your kids to be afraid of the consequences of doing something bad.  It's just classical conditioning.  

Oh dang, I better not talk back to my parents, I'll get beat.  

*20 years later...*

Oh dang, I better not go against authority, I'll get locked up.

All of my family and *most* of my friends were raised this way and they're like normal ass people.


Just for the record when I grew up, beating and spankings were the same thing. 

technically it's operant conditioning.... : P

[rachmaninoff_forever]

 RACH4 --- I like your "ass-beating" PARENTS!!!      You were probably so naughty and bull-headed as a kid !!!!  Do you love them less??  The only thing I would probably disagree with was the action towards your "stuttering".  But you got cured!!  hehahha

  

I lowkey laugh at the studdering thing.

I have so many good stories lol.


When I was a baby, my mom and dad couldn't take care of me so my aunt would fill in for my mom.  So my aunt hung out with me so much that I began to call her mommy.  But as you can probably imagine, when my mom wasn't around, she didn't like it.  So she would spank me whenever I called my aunt mommy.  So I eventually called her Molly.  

Ad now everyone else in the family calls her Molly lol.

OOOOOOH and the ridiculous ass sh*t they would say!!!!

Boiii quit that sh*t before I smack the mothafuckin throat off yo mothafuckin head boi!!!

When I had braces my dad would say that he would knock the braces out my mouth.

He would often say that he would knock my lining crooked.

Smack the black off of you is pretty common lol.

They said some pretty weird ass sh*t.

[rachmaninoff_forever]

This worries me...to ever achieve anything in life and avoid accepting every stupidity/conservative idea imposed on you by the so called authorities, you must be able to go against them. You won't end the world just because someone tells you to, do you? You do it when YOU know it's the right time!

Sorry I'm not trying to get arrested.

And I gotta be EXTRA careful cause I'm black!



Fine, not going against authority to a certain extent.  Happy?

[rachmaninoff_forever]

technically it's operant conditioning.... : P

Close enough...

Oh damn nevermind.

Looks like Pavlov is slipping from my memory.

[outin]

Sorry I'm not trying to get arrested.

And I gotta be EXTRA careful cause I'm black!

You are right there...unfortunately 

Fine, not going against authority to a certain extent.  Happy?

Accepted