Overwhelmed and on the brink of quitting

[ryanhd]

Hello. So I'll get right to the point of this thread. I'm currently on the brink of quitting piano. I started about 7 or so months ago and have been progressing very slowly. This is entirley my fault because I often only play maybe for half an hour each day, however there were gaps months ago where I didn't play at all, so it's very on and off.

I DO want to learn, and I recently started trying to really get into learning more. However, every morning I get up with the intention of learning and then one thing or another stops me where I think 'this is just too much to take in, what's the point?' and I end up feeling terrible.

I'm being completely overwhelmed by the amount of information there is to take in and the amount of resources there are to learn from, and even though that might seem like a good thing, I don't know where to start.

When I first got my keyboard I was really excited just to play songs. I use videos on youtube (those guitar hero like ones) to learn songs, and while I'm sure people here don't like that method of learning, I find it good for a beginner. Then I tried to start learning the theory by watching some youtube videos but eventually I felt like all the fun was being sucked out of piano so I sort of let it gather dust.

Now to where I am now. I've learned some basics of reading sheet music, things about the staff, ledger lines, both clefs, note names time signatures and I've finally memorized the damn keys. But there's so much more to learn I honestly don't know what I should try and learn next.

Basically, I need someone to give me a guide plan for things to work on, or even just one thing to practice or learn, something that I'm missing that would allow me to feel more confident on the piano, perhaps a really good website or youtube series that I can trust to take me through what I need to learn.

Thank you.

[timothy42b]

You could take lessons.  A teacher will guide you through a progression of what you need to learn, in bite size pieces so you don't get overwhelmed.

But we know that's unlikely.

Next best thing (well, really, next least worst thing) you need to buy a "method."  That's a book for a beginner that starts easy and progresses.  Alfred's Adult Basic Piano would probably remove a lot of your confusion.  Don't skip around, start at the front and work to the end of the book. There are other similar books out there.

https://www.amazon.com/Alfreds-Basic-Adult-Piano-Course/dp/0882846167

But you do need to get away from a touch sensitive keyboard and into weighted keys sooner rather than later. 

[bronnestam]

You could take lessons.  A teacher will guide you through a progression of what you need to learn, in bite size pieces so you don't get overwhelmed.

But we know that's unlikely.

Next best thing (well, really, next least worst thing) you need to buy a "method."  That's a book for a beginner that starts easy and progresses.  Alfred's Adult Basic Piano would probably remove a lot of your confusion.  Don't skip around, start at the front and work to the end of the book. There are other similar books out there.

https://www.amazon.com/Alfreds-Basic-Adult-Piano-Course/dp/0882846167

But you do need to get away from a touch sensitive keyboard and into weighted keys sooner rather than later. 

I agree with everything above ...

Well, it is not unusual that an inspiring pianist discovers what you just have discovered: that playing the piano is DIFFICULT. At first, it seems quite easy; the playing method is very self-instructing and intuitive compared to, let's say, making good sounds with a violin or a trumpet.

On the other hand, it is not too difficult either. If you just take one step at a time and don't rush things, you will eventually learn to play anything. You have to enjoy all these steps, as they all will lead you closer to ... where you want to be. But also keep in mind that you will never reach the end of the rainbow either, because even if you become the best pianist in history of mankind, you'd still have new goals and challenges to strive for. So, the only thing you can do is to enjoy the ride itself, the learning process.
So yes, follow one of these methods, don't cheat, don't rush, and you will get things sorted out. Good luck! 

[j_menz]

I agree with timothy42b and bronnestam.

I would only add two things:  (1) Only use one such progressive course - don't get three or four and try and do them all, it won't work any better and will probably be worse, and (2) along the way, do be sure to also play things you like on the side - just for fun.

[ted]

do be sure to also play things you like on the side - just for fun.

I don't think this is subsidiary but is close to the root of these all too frequent pleas for help from talented people on piano forums. What is the point of music at all if you do not enjoy it ? If I didn't enjoy every second at the instrument I would sooner work in the garden instead. There is a hell of a lot of work and discipline, but I enjoy that too because of the greater ecstasy I know it will generate later on.

The depressing statement made by a prominent music professional on another forum typifies this curiously negative state of mind. He said something to the effect that we must not just simply compose or improvise by playing that which sounds good to us. Well what the hell are we supposed to do, play things which sound horrible ?

The discipline is always subordinate to the ecstasy. To inculcate the converse, and such effect seems sadly widespread, leads to very talented artists, ones who potentially might have much of beauty to say, becoming mired in self-doubt and angst.

"Feeling good is good enough for me", as some song or other had it.  

[stoat_king]

Well said, Ted

[ted]

Twelve years or more ago, when I started posting on piano forums, it was largely for selfish reasons. But since then I have received requests for help from hundreds, I do not exaggerate, hundreds, of mostly young, exceptionally talented people, who are desperately unhappy in their pursuit of something which, by rights should be an unconditional joy. Regrettably, I am not good enough at either classical or jazz to give any help in those areas; I wish I could. In the creative aspect, I have been able to free one or two, and that has been a very satisfying experience, perhaps more so, in its own way, than my personal playing.

Playing the piano should be a dependable liberation of the spirit, consciousness, the soul, whatever you like to call it, not a despairing, neurotic battle for breath. Where has musical education gone wrong ?

[j_menz]

Where has musical education gone wrong ?

It has tried to tame art.

[theodore]

Hi Ryan : Why don't you try a Piano Basics book such as the :  "Alfred Adult Piano Course"
Click on

https://www.musiciansfriend.com/piano-method-books/alfred-alfreds-basic-adult-all-in-one-course-book-1?cntry=us&source=3WWRWXGP& gclid=CjwKEAiA9KymBRD6g6iOvv2joU0SJAB0vRQy1kZ4OYnZEd2Xqk0xs6zZgNCtXwgmfWtZDguZ1iqBiRoC6mbw_wcB&kwid=productads-plaid^81949915748-sku^H63061000000000@ADL4MF-adType^PLA-device^c-adid^51870555867

Hope this helps ... Theodore

[bronnestam]

Twelve years or more ago, when I started posting on piano forums, it was largely for selfish reasons. But since then I have received requests for help from hundreds, I do not exaggerate, hundreds, of mostly young, exceptionally talented people, who are desperately unhappy in their pursuit of something which, by rights should be an unconditional joy. Regrettably, I am not good enough at either classical or jazz to give any help in those areas; I wish I could. In the creative aspect, I have been able to free one or two, and that has been a very satisfying experience, perhaps more so, in its own way, than my personal playing.

Playing the piano should be a dependable liberation of the spirit, consciousness, the soul, whatever you like to call it, not a despairing, neurotic battle for breath. Where has musical education gone wrong ?

You express it very well. I am on a similar mission trying to tell people that piano studies should be fun. It should be fun all the way. Yes, there will be moments when you work hard or even struggle, but you do it because it is satisfying - just like when an athlete press her/his limits during daily exercise. I sometimes go to the gym and I like to work out until sweat breaks out on my forehead and my muscles say "enough". Yes, that is "hard work", but you all know (I hope) that it is also fun work.
Piano practice should be just as satisfying.

You wonder where musical education went wrong. Or, should we say: WHEN? Because this problem is not a new one; in fact I think it is better now than it was 30 years ago, when I was an average piano student in an average municipal music school, with a 20-minute lesson once a week. The joy of piano playing rather quickly disappeared in the tedious routine, where you were always told that you must work, work, work. Hanon exercises and scales, phew. This piece and that piece to learn. If you did not PRACTICE ENOUGH you had to be ashamed of yourself. If you practiced like h*ll you were told that you could go for music, that is, becoming some kind of pianist. Or rather, become some kind of teacher ... which did not look like a promising future to me. Sit there just like my teacher did, trying to teach kids the same boring pieces and exercises that I already hated myself? Telling them to do ... WHAT with their piano skills?

So I decided that a pianist career was for freaks and/or fakirs. Playing scales full-time for the rest of my life, no thanks. Apparently I was not made of the right material either, as I found it difficult to learn things and often could not motivate myself to do these tedious exercises or even work with my present piece assignment. And I hated to perform (I still do) because it was just horrifying and humiliating.

When I decided to pick up my sleeping piano studies some years ago I was encouraged by a real concert pianist whose skills I really admired, and I decided that I wanted to do this JUST FOR FUN and make it a joyable trip. I learned from my dog, which I have already written about. When you train a dog, you can get marvellous results ... as long as the dog think it is fun. Your job as a trainer is to make the training a fun experience for the dog. If you succeed, your dog will love both you and the training and you will get terrific results. How do you achieve that? By giving rewards all the time, and make it short and easy. You praise, you give treats, you praise even more, and if the dog "fails", it is because you ask for too much at that moment. So you make the exercise a bit easier, and - voilá!

So I became my own "dog", and instead of pushing myself and blaming myself ("oh, there I go again, I really suck, I am too lazy!") I was constantly praising myself. "I played for five minutes, wheee! I got that bar a little bit better now, I know the time signature and the key of that piece now, which I did not do before, wheee! I'm making progress!"

Suddenly all my practice sessions were a success. This simple little mind trick, stupid as it seemed, made an incredible difference. My "five minutes" became half an hour, one hour, two hours ... I longed for next practice session. I started to think about playing even when I was not at the piano. I read and I learned, I experimented. And I started to make progress like never before and quickly improved my playing beyond my wildest dreams. (OK, so they were perhaps not that wild ... I am still just an average amateur, so to speak.)

I only practice when I feel like practicing. My practice, though, is far more effective now than it used to be. I have a lesson when I feel like having a lesson, which may be once a month or so. (I don't have that much time, I have a profession and a family.) But I just love my lessons. I go to them with joy and anticipation and afterwards I feel inspired and excited.

As I make a living from other things than playing the piano, I simply sit at the piano and play because I feel happy doing so. I love to play Beethoven and Chopin, to explore their works and make them mine. I love the challenge of learning new and difficult things, to conclude that I now master things I could not do one month ago. That is development, that is life to me. And I love going to recitals and concerts and hear other pianists perform this music in a skillful, passionate way. They are my colleagues now, not creatures from another world. Far better than me, of course, but I am on the same train now and I love this journey. The piano world is wonderful, and I am part of it!

Sometimes when my Real Life really sucks - I have deep problems with a child of mine, really exhausting and depressing problems - I listen to good piano music or, even better, go to concerts. There I can be happy again, and I think "THIS is for real, THIS is what life should be about, these values are eternal". 

Yes, this is what music and music education should be about. Joy and excitement are not insignificant emotions. They are the true guides on your road to real success. They are the voice from you authentic self, from God, from your soul, whatever you like to call it. (So drugs are good, as they make you happy as well? No, they are not, because they just make you happy for a little while, and then they backfire on you, so they are not good, ok?) 
If you need approval for what you are doing, seek the approval from your soul. Seek the joy. There you have it.
Amen.

[pianoplunker]

Basically, I need someone to give me a guide plan for things to work on, or even just one thing to practice or learn, something that I'm missing that would allow me to feel more confident on the piano, perhaps a really good website or youtube series that I can trust to take me through what I need to learn.

Thank you.

This is why you need a teacher. Everything you are asking for is what a teacher can show you. A teacher is someone you can perform for and get honest feedback about what you need to work on. Internet youtube, etc has so much garbage you have a good chance of not progressing well.
No interaction with you, no help, no encouragement. There is  so much access to music via internet but cannot rely on it to learn an instrument as beginner.

[chopinlover01]

You do not even need a formal teacher to get what you desire- a fellow pianist who is willing to recommend you pieces to work on, and give you advice for them (essentially assisting your learning) will yield greater results than independent study.

[bernadette60614]

When I started first grade, no one handed me "Moby Dick" and told me that I would have to read this entire book and then do a thirty page paper contrasting the symbolism of Moby Dick with the symbolism in Crime and Punishment.

One, it would have been useless because I was just learning how to read. Two, it would be destructive, because it would have been overwhelming.

I think to some degree the availability of information in books, on-line, on video is the same thing as handing a beginner at anything that copy of Moby Dick with that assignment.  It is overwhelming and it seems hopeless.

Fortunately, I was given the Dick and Jane series. And, I mastered the lessons in that. And, then,The Little House series and I learned more about reading from that.

I think any new body of knowledge is like that.  You take it one step at a time. You don't expect yourself to be an Iron Man competitor when you first walk, similarly, don't overwhelm yourself when you're just learning how to work a routine of practice into your life.

I would say the first order: Find a way to practice everyday.  I started with a timer set to 15 minutes and community music classes. My guide was the Alfred Adult piano adventures.  Three years later, I'm up to an hour a day of practice and Schubert.

Give yourself time to enjoy the process.  If you stick to the process, you'll get there, but enjoy the road along the way.