Is it imposible to reach my goal?

[meloody]

I started learning piano since 6. I guess I practiced only an hour a day back then. I won in some competitions, and did some performances every year. But around 3 years ago, when I was playing in a competition, I suddenly forgot everything.Obviously, I lost... Plus, afterwards I immigrated to another country. I then quit piano for 2 years. I only played once in a while during that 2 years. After a lot of stuff happened in my life, I found that music is the one who gives me power. It is really what I want to do. I started to have piano classes half a year ago, and started to practice like 5 hours during weekdays; 8 hours during weekend. But obviously, there are a lot of techniques that I need to pick up and work on. That I need to start from non arct level pieces right now. And I am stuck on how to play without tense and how to play with a really good crystal-like tone. I really want to become a pianist. But I am already 16. I stopped playing piano when I was 13 to 15. I am afraid it is too late for me.
I really need some suggestions. Plus I have to go to piano performance degree audition next year!! I am afraid that I am running out of time

[adodd81802]

I'm not really sure what you are hoping for people to suggest here?

What is your end goal? To play in Carnegie hall? To win competitions? To become a respected piano teacher?

You have to be realistic and consider what your options are in your situation. We cannot all be dealt the best cards in life, however your response has to be to make the best out of the cards, and learn to be happy with that.

Many people who grow up in the "real world" or without proper guidance, often realise too late that some goals that could have only dreamed will become very unlikely to be achievable, but that doesn't mean you cannot set achievable goals.

Professional piano is not for the weak minded. That said, this does not mean you can't have "ups and downs" but you must always be focused, you must always be logical and realistic with your goals.

The last time I performed in front of a big audience was over 10 years ago, and like you I had a freeze mid performance, forget completely what I was doing... I got lucky it wasn't a competition and within a few seconds (what felt like a lifetime) my performance continued.

I too took to life, dropped the piano and took a massive career change. Next month I will be performing my first piano concert since my last 10+ years previous. I am not nervous, I am realistic, but I do not consider failing an option. I know i'm not the best pianist, I know it will not be a magical mind blowing performance, but my family will be there, i'll give it my best shot and i'll do myself proud.

[keypeg]

I'm interested in the part where you say you "lost everything" at that one point.  Lost memory of the music - of the notes - of how to produce good sounding music?  I have some thoughts which are an educated guess, and it's up to you to see whether anything seems to fit, because these are guesses.

Actually two sets of thoughts.  One is the timing of it - you "lost everything" when you turned around 12 or 13.  That's the age where young people become self-aware, self-conscious, while the little kid does his thing without a care in the world.  I don't know if physical changes would affect playing - somehow I don't think it would except maybe to make things better.

The other thing: Well, teaching can be toward end results, or toward skill and knowledge, though they intermesh.  And end result involves things like learning to brilliantly pay a piece in order to wow the judges for a competition or wow an audience.  Your teacher may tell you exactly what to do to produce that piece, and in the process you do pick up skills or else you couldn't do it - but it's all passive and automatic.  Nothing is conscious.  If you don't know how you got to something, then how can you reproduce it the next time?  How can you draw on knowledge that you never got at a conscious level?  Unfortunately a lot of teaching "toward results" goes in that direction.  If this happened to you, then if you do get these elements, it should make a great difference in the quality of your playing, and your ability to improve it at will.

A good teacher once told me (repeatedly actually) "If you can't get it later, you never had it in the first place."  He was insisting on having his students learn the skills and get the information.  He could have choreographed them into wowing people with nicely played pieces, but he wanted them to have skills that they could always draw on, and that they were consciously aware of.

I may be off base here, and admittedly this is my hobby horse (for a reason) - does it help at all?  If it makes sense, can the more senior musicians and teachers chime in?

[jimroof]

I started learning piano since 6. I guess I practiced only an hour a day back then. I won in some competitions, and did some performances every year. But around 3 years ago, when I was playing in a competition, I suddenly forgot everything.Obviously, I lost... Plus, afterwards I immigrated to another country. I then quit piano for 2 years. I only played once in a while during that 2 years. After a lot of stuff happened in my life, I found that music is the one who gives me power. It is really what I want to do. I started to have piano classes half a year ago, and started to practice like 5 hours during weekdays; 8 hours during weekend. But obviously, there are a lot of techniques that I need to pick up and work on. That I need to start from non arct level pieces right now. And I am stuck on how to play without tense and how to play with a really good crystal-like tone. I really want to become a pianist. But I am already 16. I stopped playing piano when I was 13 to 15. I am afraid it is too late for me.
I really need some suggestions. Plus I have to go to piano performance degree audition next year!! I am afraid that I am running out of time

Let me tell you my story in a nutshell because it strangely parallels yours...

Age 7 - 11 Took lessons from a pretty good teacher.  I was labeled as 'gifted' for piano.  However, unlike you, I did NOT practice much at all.  I could easily meet lesson requirements with a half hour of practice just before my lesson.

Age 12 - 17  No lessons.  However, I fell in love with Rick Wakeman and Keith Emerson and taught myself all kinds of progressive rock stuff (it really did work my fingers pretty well).  I also learned a couple of Chopin Polonaises during this time because I had grown up listening to them (A Major and Ab Major).

Age 18 - Went back to my early teacher for advice on audition pieces for the piano program at Georgia State University (had a pretty good program at the time).  Picked up a Bach Invention and something by Shostakovich to go along with the Chopin Ab Polonaise.  The audition was pretty bad.  I was not a polished player by any stretch, but the jury saw potential and let me in on 'probation'.  Probation was dropped at the end of the first quarter and I was fully in the piano performance program.

Age 20 - Performed full 1 hour recital - Beethoven Opus 22, Chopin Scherzo #3, Ginastera Piano Sonata

Age 21 - Performed second 1 hour recital - Bach Italian Concerto, 3 Debussy Preludes, Chopin Gm Ballade, Beethoven Opus 32 Eb Piano Sonata.  During my recital jury, John Schneider (then the music critic for the Atlanta Journal) told me I could do whatever I wanted to with regards to piano.  Strangely, this was the 'beginning of the end'.

Age 22 - Added Beethoven Cm Piano Concerto to repertoire and with the Ballade and Ginastera Sonata, won the state-wide Georgia Music Teacher's Piano Competition.  Failed to advance in the southeast finals.  Played the Gm Ballade at a master class with John Perry.  After I played, Perry stated 'I have nothing to say...'  then proceeded to say a few things anyway.  He wanted me as a student at the Aspen Music Festival.  I got mononucleosis and could not attend.

Age 23 - Now starting to doubt my willingness to really get into the REAL world of piano performance - I start to have second thoughts about the whole thing.  For my Senior Recital, I cobble together the strength and resolve to learn Mozart K570 (Bb Sonate - nice sonata), Brahms Bm Rhapsody, Prokofiev Piano Sonata 2 in Dm and Lizst's Mephisto Waltz (played like a bat out of hell...).  Also try to learn the Schumann Am Piano Concerto, but my mind is for some reason NOT wanting to learn it...

Upon graduation, I take about 2 years off completely since I did not want to have my piano in my apartment.  Finally get it back and play for the fun of it.

The next 30 years are playing for my own enjoyment, but not really doing anything other than sight reading pieces.  I learn and polish nothing at all.    Now I am practicing once again at age 58.

So, to answer your question, it is possible to go from where you are now to professional status IF you have more willingness to do so than I did.  I do not regret anything I did.  Whether I play or not, music has enriched my life and the life of my family.  If you are talented and are ready to start putting in 3-4 hours of steady work per day, you can get there.  I did that for 4 years and was on edge of pushing through to being a very strong player.  I did not have the temperament to finish the process, however.

For those that might think I am bragging about my youth... I am 58 years old now.  I get to do that from time to time as long as what I say is true...  ; ]

[adodd81802]

For those that might think I am bragging about my youth... I am 58 years old now.  I get to do that from time to time as long as what I say is true...  ; ]

I don't consider it bragging, just a shame you didn't push through and go the whole hog!

[pjjslp]

But I am already 16. I stopped playing piano when I was 13 to 15. I am afraid it is too late for me.
I really need some suggestions. Plus I have to go to piano performance degree audition next year!! I am afraid that I am running out of time

OK, first I have to say that 16 isn't too old for much of anything, except maybe becoming an Olympic gymnast.  In all seriousness, there is something to be said for age and maturity. I took a 25 year break from serious playing, and although my fingers worked better then, my musicality is better now. My life experiences allow me a broader and deeper well to draw from when interpreting pieces. I am more patient now, more willing to take it slow, put a piece away for a few days when it's frustrating me.

As far as becoming a "professional pianist," I agree with the above response that you need to define that for yourself. Making a living in the arts can be a tough road but only you can know whether it's a road you're willing to take. I determined by the time I was 19 or so that I didn't have the drive it would take to become an accomplished concert pianist, which was my goal in my early teens. It's so individual. You really need to take an honest look at your goals for the future, your own drive and temperament, and do what makes sense to you. But, don't tell yourself that it's hopeless because you are 16. You are still so young.

Having a year to get ready for an audition is absolutely fine as long as you have a good teacher who can help you choose pieces that are appropriate to your level. Best of luck!

[pianoplunker]

Let me tell you my story in a nutshell because it strangely parallels yours...

Age 7 - 11 Took lessons from a pretty good teacher.  I was labeled as 'gifted' for piano.  However, unlike you, I did NOT practice much at all.  I could easily meet lesson requirements with a half hour of practice just before my lesson.

Age 12 - 17  No lessons.  However, I fell in love with Rick Wakeman and Keith Emerson and taught myself all kinds of progressive rock stuff (it really did work my fingers pretty well).  I also learned a couple of Chopin Polonaises during this time because I had grown up listening to them (A Major and Ab Major).

Age 18 - Went back to my early teacher for advice on audition pieces for the piano program at Georgia State University (had a pretty good program at the time).  Picked up a Bach Invention and something by Shostakovich to go along with the Chopin Ab Polonaise.  The audition was pretty bad.  I was not a polished player by any stretch, but the jury saw potential and let me in on 'probation'.  Probation was dropped at the end of the first quarter and I was fully in the piano performance program.

 My story is similar to yours. I was trying to learn a really fast harpsichord riff by Rick Wakeman and found the same riff in a Bach Invention  , hence an opening into the Bach world. I quit trying to learn  Rick Wakeman's stuff and moved right back into classical instead.  Same thing with Emerson. I heard some of the piano and organ and realized I wanted to learn it. With him, that covers just about every genre of music so study it all. In fact Emerson said in an interview that the best thing he always had a focus on diversification which is why he had so many different styles available to him. With that I would also say to the poster that you can make money and be a professional if you can play or learn "anything".  If you stick with one type of music, not only does it get more advanced but the competetion of others who play one type of music can get in the way of making money. I think most kids get insecure about what to do to make a living and how to go about it. The very best way is one day at a time with an eye on the prize - whatever that is for you. But nothing is carved in stone. I am 54 but if you told me when I was 18 that I would have a fabulous career doing what I am doing now, I would have called the special ambulance for you. But with all that, I am now at a point where I am trying to figure out what I really want to do when I grow up. All you can do is the best you can

[briansaddleback]

I started learning piano since 6. I guess I practiced only an hour a day back then. I won in some competitions, and did some performances every year. But around 3 years ago, when I was playing in a competition, I suddenly forgot everything.Obviously, I lost... Plus, afterwards I immigrated to another country. I then quit piano for 2 years. I only played once in a while during that 2 years. After a lot of stuff happened in my life, I found that music is the one who gives me power. It is really what I want to do. I started to have piano classes half a year ago, and started to practice like 5 hours during weekdays; 8 hours during weekend. But obviously, there are a lot of techniques that I need to pick up and work on. That I need to start from non arct level pieces right now. And I am stuck on how to play without tense and how to play with a really good crystal-like tone. I really want to become a pianist. But I am already 16. I stopped playing piano when I was 13 to 15. I am afraid it is too late for me.
I really need some suggestions. Plus I have to go to piano performance degree audition next year!! I am afraid that I am running out of time

Go practice, stay off the internet. Stop wasting more time.

[jimroof]

My story is similar to yours. I was trying to learn a really fast harpsichord riff by Rick Wakeman...

Siberian Khatru?

[adodd81802]

Go practice, stay off the internet. Stop wasting more time.

Honest and straight to the point. I'm getting too soft lol

[jimroof]

Go practice, stay off the internet. Stop wasting more time.

I am getting in an hour or two every day.  I can tell the difference...  Here is what I am working on in order of concentration...

Chopin 25 #6
Chopin 10 #2
Chopin Scherzo #2
Brahms Concerto 2 (taking it in bits and pieces...)
Liszt Mephisto Waltz (yeah... I know... I don't like Liszt that much...)

I hang here as a form of accountability.

[adodd81802]

I am getting in an hour or two every day.  I can tell the difference...  Here is what I am working on in order of concentration...

Chopin 25 #6
Chopin 10 #2
Chopin Scherzo #2
Brahms Concerto 2 (taking it in bits and pieces...)
Liszt Mephisto Waltz (yeah... I know... I don't like Liszt that much...)

I hang here as a form of accountability.

The comment wasn't aimed at you Jimroof but the Original Poster

[jimroof]

The comment wasn't aimed at you Jimroof but the Original Poster

I guess the shoe seemed to fit me as well...  tee hee...

[dratinistar]

Why don't you look up the story of Lucas Debargue who made the final of the Tchaikovsky competition after playing for 4 years.

[Bob]

I didn't read the whole thing, but... If you have to ask, performance probably isn't happening.  There still are performing jobs though.  Add in teaching and whatever to make ends meet.  Even good performers are probably still teaching and even doing something else a bit to make money.

Music ed is different than piano performance, even piano teaching.   They're different worlds.  I could see something working with a part-time music ed job though with performance, esp. with general music on the music ed side.

If you do go for music ed, don't let on to anyone at the music school that you're really more interested in performance or that teaching is a "fall back" in some way.  Work-wise, teaching takes a lot of effort, and then add in the schooling before that... That's cutting out practice time.  If it's U.S. public school music education, there's a lot of bullshit and garbage in the environment.  A lot of wasted time, things that waste your time.

Whatever you do, performance or music ed, watch out for the music school.  They are selling you a degree.  Don't completely trust them.  Make sure you're in control -- leading, making decisions -- and not just following what they say.  At the end, when you've got the degree, you'll be on your own to make money (and pay back the degree debt very likely).  The people who sold you the degree won't be around to help out then.  If they're wrong, oh well... They still got paid when you bought the degree.  You end up on the losing end later potentially.

Also factor in other life things -- if you have a family, get married, have kids, etc.  Those are going to impact practicing and decision-making.

[mrcreosote]

Was your "forgot everything" relevant to your question of what you can achieve?  Was it a one shot deal with no subsequent memory issues?

As far as "knowing" what you are doing.  Lawrence Olivia said that he was terrified every time he took the stage because he had no control of his talent and no assurance that it would reveal itself.  So he threw himself into the abyss when he performed.  (I think it was Olivia, but that is irrelevant, not the story.)

The "forgot everything" sounds like it never happened which really is a misnomer - it never happened until it did.  It could be very well true that this could occur every few years.

But from personal experience, an epic fail like that can cause a negative "epiphany" - one that "makes you aware" of a great fear - one might say this even "creates" the fear.   And once you have that fear - once you realize you are naked for instance, it totally messes everything up thereafter.  For me, I won't discuss what the issue was, but it took me at least 35 years to over come it - and that was done simply by the passage of time where I finally just didn't care and so the fear "disappeared."

Oh yes, I have "forgotten everything" and yes, it was the Big Cadenza in some piece that's now totally forgotten.

[billykid33]

Theodore Roosevelt once said, "Believe, and you are halfway there."  I think you can do anything with hard work and maybe just a little faith in something.  Always believe you can, and do not ever let anyone make or let you feel inferior.  I think all great artist are a bit manic depressive, or bi-polar, which I believe is where our great inspirations come from.  Take care! Do what you love!!!✌️️
***Always have a plan, a sort of "guideline" for your life.  Don't make it the Bible, but definitely keep a planner, and your long-term goals visible.  You have to have a target to aim for.  I truly think if you focus on it, know it's sync with you, and believe it is possible, you can, without a doubt, accomplish your aspirations.

[vaniii]

Age is irrelevant.

There is more to being a musician than fame.

Talent is a myth, it is nothing but hard work and self confidence.

Doubt is toxic.

You can do anything you set your mind to and pursue, without ego or pomposity.

To achieve true greatness in a task similar to others, you have to take the same steps they took.

The steps do not mean the same 'life' choices, but time spent with the same level of focus and attention to detail.

Do not be fooled, though we see and hear the moments of glory of the great musicians, what we do not see are the hours spent on the basics.

I promise you, the great pianists do not spend hours laboring over one particular piece, they work on - what most consider - the boring stuff, so they can simply play it:

To explain: "Rather than laboring over every note as separate entities, the true masters learn how they are connected (i.e, a string of C,D,E,F,G,A,B,C, is a C major diatonic scale; or, C,D,E,G,C, is an interupted pentatonic scale).  When looking at music, if you understand this concept, you can simply read it from the page."

Most importantly, it is never to late as long as you are willing to make a sacrifice.  The sacrifice is always our own to make:

Are you willing to sacrifice your ego?
Are you willing to sacrifice your perception?
Are you willing to sacrifice your monetary income?
Are you willing to do what it takes to get to where you want to be?

Work hard (and smart) and you will achieve anything you want!

Good luck!

[vaniii]

Theodore Roosevelt once said, "Believe, and you are halfway there."  I think you can do anything with hard work and maybe just a little faith in something.  Always believe you can, and do not ever let anyone make or let you feel inferior.  I think all great artist are a bit manic depressive, or bi-polar, which I believe is where our great inspirations come from.  Take care! Do what you love!!!✌️️
***Always have a plan, a sort of "guideline" for your life.  Don't make it the Bible, but definitely keep a planner, and your long-term goals visible.  You have to have a target to aim for.  I truly think if you focus on it, know it's sync with you, and believe it is possible, you can, without a doubt, accomplish your aspirations.

Sorry for the double post but this is important.

However, don't forget to remain humble.  If you ever loose this trait, you are destined to fail ... repeatedly.

[j_tour]

Go practice, stay off the internet. Stop wasting more time.

QFT.  Most hours of every day, every week, every year, should be dedicated in some way to music.  How you divide it up is up to you or whatever neuroscientific theories you decide are acceptable.

A trained ape can be a great "professional pianist" at whatever age.  It's not exactly a high bar you're setting.

You just have to be better OR nicer OR better-smelling OR less "special" than the next pianist.

It's like the joke about two joggers outrunning a bear and one stops to lace his or shoes...."just have to outrun you, sucka!"  Well, that's not exactly the whole joke, but I'm sure you've heard it or a similar one.

[josh93248]

QFT.  Most hours of every day, every week, every year, should be dedicated in some way to music.  How you divide it up is up to you or whatever neuroscientific theories you decide are acceptable.

A trained ape can be a great "professional pianist" at whatever age.  It's not exactly a high bar you're setting.

You just have to be better OR nicer OR better-smelling OR less "special" than the next pianist.

It's like the joke about two joggers outrunning a bear and one stops to lace his or shoes...."just have to outrun you, sucka!"  Well, that's not exactly the whole joke, but I'm sure you've heard it or a similar one.

I want to report this post to a moderator........ For how awesome it is.

[j_tour]

I want to report this post to a moderator........ For how awesome it is.

There are moderators?  Who knew!

Well, first let me say (i) you are 100% correct, I am pretty awesome (ii) I am also correct in what I say:  being a "professional pianist" is mostly about business and being better at "soft skills" than the next person.  Now, actually being a technically-proficient and musically interesting professional pianist is a whole other thing -- but let's be real, most people aren't, and those who are, they're on your record shelf or are a Youtube sensation.

Just got to do it, every day, and don't stop.  Not any different than anything else in life -- the technique can come easily if you have the knack, but the hard parts are figuring out the "soft skills" of making it fit in with the rest of your life.

That sounded kind of annoying and preachy, but, hey, I'm having a slow weekend, so whatever.

[avguste]

Where are you located at? That would help me giving you somewhat of a valid answer.

I started learning piano since 6. I guess I practiced only an hour a day back then. I won in some competitions, and did some performances every year. But around 3 years ago, when I was playing in a competition, I suddenly forgot everything.Obviously, I lost... Plus, afterwards I immigrated to another country. I then quit piano for 2 years. I only played once in a while during that 2 years. After a lot of stuff happened in my life, I found that music is the one who gives me power. It is really what I want to do. I started to have piano classes half a year ago, and started to practice like 5 hours during weekdays; 8 hours during weekend. But obviously, there are a lot of techniques that I need to pick up and work on. That I need to start from non arct level pieces right now. And I am stuck on how to play without tense and how to play with a really good crystal-like tone. I really want to become a pianist. But I am already 16. I stopped playing piano when I was 13 to 15. I am afraid it is too late for me.
I really need some suggestions. Plus I have to go to piano performance degree audition next year!! I am afraid that I am running out of time