Help

[rachmaninoff_forever]

I don't need anyone's help, just cause I'm the greatest

But I wanna know if anyone has experienced this before

My girlfriend broke up with me cause her parents don't like black people and they would cut her off if she didn't break up with me.  They're Chinese.

[outin]

I don't need anyone's help, just cause I'm the greatest

But I wanna know if anyone has experienced this before

My girlfriend broke up with me cause her parents don't like black people and they would cut her off if she didn't break up with me.  They're Chinese.

Well, obviously I have not experienced something like that...and it's sad while not surprising to hear it still happens on this century.

Were you planning to marry her and live happily ever after? If not, it's her loss. Move on

If she is the love of your life (which of course is just a delusion) then tough luck, you are obviously not important enough for her. If you were she would stand up for herself and probably with time the parents would accept you after they hear you play the piano with your lovely hands

[mjames]

lol I've been in the exact same situation before, except she was Korean. Twas four years ago, so I'm way over it.

[rachmaninoff_forever]

Well, obviously I have not experienced something like that...and it's sad while not surprising to hear it still happens on this century.

Were you planning to marry her and live happily ever after? If not, it's her loss. Move on

If she is the love of your life (which of course is just a delusion) then tough luck, you are obviously not important enough for her. If you were she would stand up for herself and probably with time the parents would accept you after they hear you play the piano with your lovely hands

Well duh when you're dating someone one off two things will happen.  You break up, or you get married...  Or one of you dies...  Or you both die.  So four things.  Like I planned to marry her eventually.

And they already heard me play piano before. 

[outin]

Well duh when you're dating someone one off two things will happen.  You break up, or you get married...  Or one of you dies...  Or you both die.  So four things.  Like I planned to marry her eventually.

And they already heard me play piano before. 

Then they are stupid and you don't want your kids to have their genes...

[chopinlover01]

Sucks to hear it mate. If it was solely the basis of her parent's wishes, though, seems to me that she's somewhat submissive, to the point of not being her own person. Best to stay away from that IMO.
Hope you feel better soon.

[rachmaninoff_forever]

Sucks to hear it mate. If it was solely the basis of her parent's wishes, though, seems to me that she's somewhat submissive, to the point of not being her own person. Best to stay away from that IMO.
Hope you feel better soon.

The thing is if her parents threaten to cut her off there's really nothing she can do cause she's not stable yet.

as thick skinned and not give a f--- attitude as I may be, I'm still having a really hard time with this.

[mjames]

why cant you just date in secret

[ted]

This is perfectly revolting, rach, and it saddens me that this sort of ignorance persists. I know it is of little consolation at the moment, but one aphorism which is true is that there are indeed plenty of fish in the sea, ones with more character and brains for a start.

My wife and I are around seventy now. In the early days of our marriage I actually encountered this nonsense directly on one or two occasions from people I had thought better of. A female colleague at work asked me, "What's wrong with a white woman then ?" Another old family friend asked, "Why did YOU have to get a wife from overseas ?" I remained calm in both cases and explained that there is nothing wrong with a white woman and I did not "get" a wife from overseas. For her part, my wife married me against concerted opposition from her family, who did their level best to stop us.

Sorry to hear this type of thing is alive and well. The world is becoming a smaller place and such ideas should have died a natural death ages ago.



 

[swagmaster420x]

This is perfectly revolting, rach, and it saddens me that this sort of ignorance persists. I know it is of little consolation at the moment, but one aphorism which is true is that there are indeed plenty of fish in the sea, ones with more character and brains for a start.

My wife and I are around seventy now. In the early days of our marriage I actually encountered this nonsense directly on one or two occasions from people I had thought better of. A female colleague at work asked me, "What's wrong with a white woman then ?" Another old family friend asked, "Why did YOU have to get a wife from overseas ?" I remained calm in both cases and explained that there is nothing wrong with a white woman and I did not "get" a wife from overseas. For her part, my wife married me against concerted opposition from her family, who did their level best to stop us.

Sorry to hear this type of thing is alive and well. The world is becoming a smaller place and such ideas should have died a natural death ages ago.



 

This story has been told through the Montagues and the Capulets. Sorry that this happened in this day and age but Asians can be pretty XenoPhobic XD

[Bob]

Depends how much control the parents have and how independent she is.  She wouldn't *have* to do what her parents say.


Sometimes I wonder about the negative side of political correctness in the US, but then I see stuff that makes me think other countries are farther behind.  Some of the more obvious non-PC people I've run into aren't from the US.

[rachmaninoff_forever]

Depends how much control the parents have and how independent she is.  She wouldn't *have* to do what her parents say.

She just graduated from school and is starting her job teaching 8th grade in August.

Her parents are moving so they gotta pay for her living expenses for a little while.

[chopinlover01]

Sometimes I wonder about the negative side of political correctness in the US, but then I see stuff that makes me think other countries are farther behind.  Some of the more obvious non-PC people I've run into aren't from the US.

I fail to see any connection between this and political correctness.
In addition, most of the so called "fighting back against PC outrage" has been people just pointing out other people's sexist or racist attitudes.. Not saying that's the case with you; just an observation of the so called "Anti PC" movement.

[Petter]

She's lying and needed a reason to break up with you.

[rachmaninoff_forever]

She's lying and needed a reason to break up with you.

Lying about what

[kawai_cs]

Very surprised and sorry to hear that! Hopefully things get better for you soon!
And I really hope this way of thinking is very unusual nowadays.

[mjames]

And I really hope this way of thinking is very unusual nowadays.

It isn't. Racial collectivism, xenophobia, and racism is still a very big thing in pretty much everywhere in the world.

[kawai_cs]

You are right, there is unfortunately plenty of prejudice, distrust, phobia and even aggression towards the "different", "unknown" everywhere in general. But in a particular case that relates to a person her parents got to know I would expect reasonable people to reconsider and thus I am still shocked about the radical reaction that followed.

[Bob]

I just meant in the US rights, etc. is always an issue, pushed out into the minds of everyone. 

She's got a job (income) but her parents are moving and dictate what she does?  If they were paying her bills or for college, I could see them forcing things on here, but... Isn't she pretty much independent at this point?