Am I really into playing piano? Am I in the right path?

[wankimx3]

Hi guys~ well I asked these two questions is because despite learning for approximately 12 years already, I didn't feel I have a intimate relationship with my piano. I am also not too into classical music, but more into the 20th century jazz and popular music. I sometimes feel that practicing piano is like a chore, but sometimes I get motivated and eager to practice because I want to revv up my piano skills to play more advanced pieces.

Honestly, I don't know why I still continued on till now. Maybe it's because I'm aware that I have a strength in music since young and I'm not good at anything else. I'm literally bad at everything, except for art and music, while my art isn't really my core strength (I'm more interested in art). Music is.

I started learning piano at the age of 7 and got a distinction for my grade 5 piano exam. Despite not having an immense passion for piano and classical music, I liked the sense of achievement I get from my good performance. I actually wanted to quit piano at Grade 4. It's not that I hate piano, it's just that I felt that practicing is like a chore and it needs alot of hardwork. My parents encouraged me to think twice before quitting piano forever, and I did. I had this gut feeling that I shouldn't quit even if I don't enjoy it to the full potential. Then because of this, I persisted till now.

Recently, I really want to be more interested and be more passionate about piano and music. Actually, I get more motivated when I see pianists enjoying their playing and cultivating a strong relationship with their piano. I would like to be like them tbh. I felt that I am not too into classical music either. But my music college friends loved classical music and one of them listened to them on a daily basis. I would want to cultivate this kind of interest too.

Guys.....do u think I'm actually into piano and classical music or not? I'm kinda confused but I don't want to quit after coming so far. My piano teachers all said that I have the potential for music because music is my strength. I got good results in my first year of music college. I don't want to just quit. I'll be nothing if I quit. I want to be more passionate and want to enjoy more when I practice, so that I don't feel that practicing is like a chore. Do you guys have any suggestions to this? Thanks very much.

[lostinidlewonder]

I think the problem can be isolating yourself and not sharing your music with others. If one only does it ONLY for themselves things can feel directionless sometimes. It is when you are sharing it with others that you can then enjoy it even more when it is just for yourself.

[wankimx3]

I think the problem can be isolating yourself and not sharing your music with others. If one only does it ONLY for themselves things can feel directionless sometimes. It is when you are sharing it with others that you can then enjoy it even more when it is just for yourself.

I do enjoy music more when I jam with others/play with others in an orchestra. I participated in Chinese orchestra before in secondary school and I love and still remember the experience.

[lostinidlewonder]

There are also many other opportunities to play for people and have a commitment to do so. I find it sad when people don't share their skill with the world and keep it all to themselves, you never know what kind of changes to your life can occur when you connect with others more frequently, the window of opportunity is a funny thing in that way.

[fignewton]

I agree that we should share our music with other people, so maybe posting stuff on YouTube might make you enjoy what you're doing more. Another thing you could try is accompanying singers or instrumentalists for their lessons. You might not enjoy it that much, but it will definitely improve your musicianship at the very least.

Regarding not being into classical rep.. I was a bit the same way my freshman year, even though I was pursuing a jazz piano degree. I really loved jazz, so I liked studying music by Ravel, Debussy, Prokofiev, etc., to influence my jazz playing. From there, my love of the classical composers started in reverse chronological order generally, always with the aim of incorporating techniques used in the classical rep into my improv/arrangements. About a year later, I found that I loved the whole classical piano rep and wanted to focus on that exclusively, so I switched to classical performance. Now I am almost 30, and the canon of piano music is almost like a religion for me, so in that sense, the music provides me fulfillment in life even when I am not sharing it with other people.

I think not wanting to practice is the biggest factor if you are considering continuing/dropping piano. I have usually really enjoyed playing the piano in my spare time generally, so I haven't had a big issue with practicing (except when I was 10-14 years old). However, it definitely can feel like difficult work, especially when learning a new piece or drilling stuff. I also find performing to feel like difficult work sometimes.. there is a sense of responsibility and stress to do well, so it puts a dark cloud on the week or month leading up to it. But if you are considering music as a career path, it can be a really difficult lifestyle as I'm sure you know, so it's important to still somewhat enjoy the whole process even at its worst.

If I were in your position, I would maybe try to use the rest of this summer to learn rep that I really love, try to record one or two of those pieces and post on YouTube if I was happy with the recording, and try to analyze which parts of that practicing/learning process I enjoy or don't enjoy. Maybe doing something like this will give you a better idea of whether you should continue or not.