How lonely are you...

[pianowelsh]

Woe! Reading this i wondered whether this was 'pianists annonimous' or a dating agency! - Ouch!  Its natural to be a little lonely when you spend all your time on your own! - eh! Im good im good! actually for me the most lonely thing is practising in college when you can hear disjointed sounds of everyone else beavering away at their practice and knowing that noone has time to think about you or even cares what you doing in your practice cell!

[BoliverAllmon]

TDS is so debonaire..he makes pierce brosnon look like ol' dirty bastard

I read that post several times and laughed hysterically. I thought you said "STD is so debonaire....."

boliver

[Dazzer]

Woe! Reading this i wondered whether this was 'pianists annonimous' or a dating agency! - Ouch!  Its natural to be a little lonely when you spend all your time on your own! - eh! Im good im good! actually for me the most lonely thing is practising in college when you can hear disjointed sounds of everyone else beavering away at their practice and knowing that noone has time to think about you or even cares what you doing in your practice cell!

if only there was a dating agency for pianists...

[thalberg]

One time I was practicing the accompaniment for Meditation from Thais.  This unbelievably beautiful woman who lived in the apartment above me brought her violin down and asked if I wanted to run through the piece together.  We did.  Then she tried to pick me up.  I didn't oblige her, though, because I knew she had a boyfriend and shouldn't have been doing that.  Naughty!

[Goldberg]

Like others have said, namely Ted and danyalswan, I work much better in a certain state of solitude that enables me to work *without thinking about other people* which generally means that nobody else is home, nobody is outside the house, nobody's calling me (that really throws me off, when I have to stop and pick up the phone).

I'm also my own best friend at the same time, and have gone beyond assuming that it sounds lame or pathetic. The thought doesn't even cross my mind these days. I talk to myself outloud (when nobody is around; if they are, sometimes I mumble under my breath) and entertain myself by coming up with different voices, accents, and even entire personalities.

But as far as real people go, my best friend lives in London and I haven't seen her in the flesh for two years now (though that's about to change, in August), and every now and then I'll strike off a previously-cold relationship with a local pianist, for instance I used to know a guy from a public high school I had the misfortune of attending three or four years ago, and we haven't spoken for several years, but just about a week ago we happened to both be on AIM and, without even missing a beat, we must have talked for three hours about piano and music, and now we're set up to sign up for a Chopin competition together and coach each other on our music. That's generally how things go with me.

Sometimes I feel lonely when I see people, especially those with whom I used to be, or still feel, close to, dating people and spending all their time with them and snuggling up and what have you, and of course I have nobody, not even potentially. But then I remember that, despite that, I have something that sets me apart from all of them, something that fuels me in a different way. I have a connection to music, and they will probably never see it the same way I do. Then, having thought of that, I look at them and think "these are the people who will come to my recitals together and hold hands in the audience while I, all alone on stage where I belong, relax, entertain, and thrill them. Then they will applaud, go home, and make love, and perhaps I will go home, watch a boxing match or Stanley Kubrick video, and fall asleep with my clothes on."

Heh, but really that doesn't affect me a whole lot. More often than not, it actually helps to drive my practice sessions. That said, I do wish I knew how to spark up a more interesting social life, because I run the risk of becoming dried up and boring, and as it is I can hardly talk about anything outside of music.

It's interesting that someone else mentioned his vocal chords atrophying, because I feel exactly the same way sometimes! Talking outloud and singing with my piano has helped me use them more constantly!

[danyal]

Ok. You have just summed up everything I was trying to say rather nicely.  I talk to myself. Constantly. Its necessary. Anyway. There's not much more I can really add to your post Goldberg, so I´ll just leave it at that.

[Teddybear]

\----------o----------/

This lonely.

Once it was ok, now it's not. I have a fairly traumatic background. Bla bla bla. Should make me a good pianist.

T

[jason2711]

I generally only feel the loneliness when i'm off the piano.  However, even with  a group of friends, I somehow feel lonely.  I just don't think we really understand each other that much.  There are some who i can connect to but i tend to have a rather poor social life, not by choice, but simply because it never works out.  I don't know

However, in long practice bouts i can survive fine.  I do talk to myself (i do in most situations anyway) but music allows me to release those pented-up feelings inside me and is just about my only escape mechanism (its kinda like drinking then, without the hangovers )  The fact that i'm probably not going to do it as a career and follow some medicine based life sickens me, so i'll continue to live the dream