Am I made to play piano... ?

[Garfield]

Hello !

I'm new on this forum, and wanted to ask a question that is quite vital for me : Am I made to play piano ?

To explain : When I'm NOT playing piano, I often think about it, about the many pieces I'd want to play, etc... but JUST BEFORE playing I've a strange feeling : a fear of playing, I say to me : "Well you're gonna play later, this evening, etc" - it seems I want to avoid playing piano.
And when i'm playing, I seem bored, the total opposite of the feeling I had when I wasn't playing piano : I'm discouraged, even when a piece of my repertoire seems good I always think that I played it quite bad, etc; and it really blocks me in my piano studies.

To resume, it's quite a paradoxal feeling depending of the moments : when i'm not playing i want to play, when i'm playing piano bores me ... :-/...

I don't know if you can help me or anything, but I'd be glad to have any helps, suggestions, etc... because I'm really in trouble these days because of that.

PS : And sorry for my english, i'm not really used to write it.

[PoSeiDoN]

You need more faith in yourself!  I know, I know--much easier said than done.  What kind of stuff are you working on now that bores you?  Just remember, a person's got to climb a ladder before he can play the big pieces he's always dreamed of playing.  And the climbing of this ladder can often be a long, laborious, and sometimes boring, task.  

Just stick with it, and be persistent.  Pick something that interests you, regardless of its level of difficulty.  And work at it diligently.  Good luck.

[88keys]

Perhaps you are simply not content with your current level of playing?

Played "good" or "bad" is a relative term, depends on how much you expect of yourself. From what you are saying, it seems that your expectations are very high.

If this is indeed what's going on, than I'll say you are definitely made to play piano! You want to play well, and what's even more important, you know that currently you aren't playing that good (most piano students aren't aware of these things).

If this really is what troubling you, here is a suggestion:

For now, play easier pieces. Focus on pieces you can realistically play at the high level you expect from yourself.

Don't worry about these pieces being too easy or too unimpressive. Once your interest in the piano is renewed, you'll progress fairly quickly. Eventually, you'll be able to play almost any piece very well.

It might take a few years, but if you practice regularly, you'll get there.

[Garfield]

I understand. Thank you for your answers !

88keys : Thinking about it, I realizing that what you're saying is perfectly right : I always try to make my piece "perfect", or the most possible. One error on a note sometimes turn me mad, you see the point (i'm not joking).
Instead of playing "easy pieces", don't you think that I maybe should spend more time optimising my current repertoire and pieces that i'm learning, you know, playing more times slow (separated hands, then the two hands), etc...  to know them very well ?
Or do you (or other people in the forum) have other suggestions ?

Thank you very very much for your answers, they just opened my eyes  

PS : And, once again, sorry for my english  

[Cyprus]

If you're bored playing piano, then maybe you shouldn't be playing.  I realize it's the common answer to say "keep going!" or "don't give up!".  But why?

Playing an instrument is supposed to be for entertainment, for the musician and the audience.  If you can't enjoy what you're doing, then don't force yourself into doing it.  Some people just aren't meant to be musicians.

[88keys]

Garfield, if you want, you can spend more time "optimising" your current repertoire, BUT:

You should be warned that this is likely to take many hours of practice. And in the course of this practice, you will probably have to play the piece hundreds of times, most of which will not be perfect... And given that you are already bored and tense at the piano, I hardly think this approach will be very productive for you.

What's worse, it is possible that the pieces you are currently playing are a little beyond your current level, which means that you won't be able to play them "mistake-free" at all, until your general technique improves (i.e. in a year or two).

So while you can do this, I wouldn't recommend it. You need to find a way to relax and enjoy the piano, not a way to make yourself more nervous...

This means either playing easier pieces (not "easy pieces"!, just ones easier then those you currently play), or learning to enjoy playing your current repertoire despite the occasional error. Of-course, you might want to combine both suggestions and play both.

And as Cyprus said, there is another option: quit the piano. But I would think twice before choosing this option, since at least part of you obviously wants to continue.

[Hmoll]

Are you made to play the piano?
I don't know. Maybe a better question is: what do you want to get out of playing the piano?  Playing the piano can be very rewarding and joyful on many levels, from playing a piece you like reasonably well, to the sense of accomplishment you get from practicing hard and solving a technical problem.
Some people like the nuts-and-bolts of rolling up their sleeves and practicing a lot. Other people like the idea of playing the piano, but don't want to get too bothered by practicing. Then there are the rest of us somewhere in the middle.
I don't know if you are feeling overwhelmed by the amount of work it takes to play some of the pieces you like or discouraged by the level you currently play at. What I would suggest is to lighten up a little. Realize that playing the piano well is not easy. It takes work, but it's not impossible. Also, it is an incredible gift, and the prospect of sitting down and practicing should not strike fear into you. It should be a positive experience.  Any artistic endeavor is 10% inspiration and 90% perspiration. The difference is how much you allow yourself to enjoy the process.