Some piano manufacturers have been designing their pianos to lessen the noise of finger slapping on keys.
However, in my opinion one should not dwell too much on the "slapping" effect. It is a part of piano playing. More advanced pieces may require techniqe that produces some slapping noises, but this is usually not audiable from a distance.
Just like how a guitar player should worry about the noise created when sliding the LH over the strings quickly, or the chiff of some ranks of pipes on an organ - they are all just part of the instrument.
As for touch: these two different techniques produce different sounds. Use the one which produces the sound you want. Maybe an opening legato line may require close to the keys, while an opening marcato fugato subject may require attack from above.