Musical Terminology

[cfortunato]

This was sent to me in email:

Obbligato - being forced to practice
Con Moto - yeah baby, I have a car
Allegro - a little car
Metronome - short, city musician who can fit into a Honda Civic
Lento - the days leading up to Easto
Largo - beer brewed in Germany or the Florida Keys
Piu Animato - clean out the cat's litter box
Con Spirito - drunk again
Colla Voce - this shirt is so tight I can't sing
Improvisation - what you do when the music falls down
Prelude - warm-up before the clever stuff
Flats - English apartments
Chords - things organists play with one finger
Discords - thing that organists play with two fingers
Suspended Chords - useful for lynching the vocalist
Time Signatures - things for drummers to ignore
Melody - an ancient, now almost extinct art in songwriting
Klavierstuck - A term used by German furniture movers attempting to get a piano through a narrow doorway.
Music Stand - An intricate device used to hold music. Comes in  two sizes - too high or too low - always broken.
Tonic - A medicinal drink consumed in great quantity before a performance, and in greater quantity afterwards.
Dominant - What parents must be if they expect their children to practice.
Concert Hall - A place where large audiences gather, for the sole purpose of removing paper wrappings from candy and gum.
Sotto Voce - singing while drunk
Agogic - playing high enough on an oboe to make the eyes  bulge.
Cadenza - slapping noise on office furniture
Fandango - grabbing the pull chain on the ceiling fan
Prima Volta - jump start with a battery
Refrain - proper technique for playing bagpipes
Smorzando - with melted chocolate and marshmallow

[steve jones]

I always knew my teacher was wrong!