Help me become a hillbilly.

[rc]

For Halloween me and a friend are going to sing 'Man of Constant Sorrow', the idea was from O brother where art thou.  Cool movie.

So I want to go all the way, not just dress up and learn a few tunes but really become a hick.  Was growing a pretty mean beard for scruff-factor, but it got a little trimmed at a party last night.  Instead I went for the jackass moustache & chops, I'm happy with that.

I'm already very good at drinking beer and have a little experience as a pirate and criminal, but I could use a little help to become more redneck.  What are some good hick movies, roles, actors?  Comedians?  Books? Ideas for what to wear?

No sense in going halfway, I want to saturate myself in this.

[johnny-boy]

Watch "Deliverance". You may not want to be a hillbilly anymore.

John

[pianistimo]

i want to see this!  that had to be one of my favorite movies of all time.  a close second to 'african queen.'  so many unexpected turns. 

ok.  how to be a hick.  take a black permanent marker and knock out a few teeth.  then watch the 'amanda' show.  there's one where she dressed up like a hick and stays obviously barefoot.  not sure how cold it will be on that night - but the more gross your feet are, the better.  maybe fake feet?  a little straw in the pants and hat.  oh, and a banjo would compliment the song 'man of constant sorrow.' 

[rc]

Watch "Deliverance". You may not want to be a hillbilly anymore.

John

I saw part of that on TV not too long ago, it was a bit disturbing.

I'm not interested in being a rapist hillbilly, more like a fun hillbilly who sings songs.

(I'll likely watch Deliverance anyways, gotta see how that one ends)

...Another good movie on the darkside of hickness is Undertow, if you're interested, I highly recommend it.

I believe Philip Glass wrote the score.

i want to see this! that had to be one of my favorite movies of all time. a close second to 'african queen.' so many unexpected turns.

ok. how to be a hick. take a black permanent marker and knock out a few teeth. then watch the 'amanda' show. there's one where she dressed up like a hick and stays obviously barefoot. not sure how cold it will be on that night - but the more gross your feet are, the better. maybe fake feet? a little straw in the pants and hat. oh, and a banjo would compliment the song 'man of constant sorrow.'

Dirty feet is a great idea!  It'll probably be freezing cold but I could weather it.  Straw too, I could possibly roll around in some hay bales.  Not sure if marker would stay on the teeth well, but worth a try. 

Thanks!

[johnny-boy]

I'm not interested in being a rapist hillbilly, more like a fun hillbilly who sings songs.

Then you want to watch the "Darlings" episides of the Andy Griffith Show. You can purchase the Andy Griffith DVD with some of the episodes with the Darlings in it.

Best, John

[thalbergmad]

Watch "Deliverance". You may not want to be a hillbilly anymore.

John

He can even borrow my favourite Banjo.

Thal

[jas]

Was growing a pretty mean beard for scruff-factor, but it got a little trimmed at a party last night.

Makes a change from shaving off peoples' eyebrows, I suppose.

[rc]

Thanks for the suggestions.  I'll hit the rental stores soon.

Banjo-friend is somewhere in australia ATM.  I do know another person who has a banjo, but won't lend it to us.

I guess I'll have to borrow Thal's.

...and they were thinking of trimming my eyebrows, but decided not to.  A good decision.

[pianistimo]

just put tape over them.  i won't get into the details of brazilian eyebrow waxing.

[soliloquy]

Ahaha I'm from Alabama, so I can help you out.


You need a pair of jeans that is a couple sizes too short, and a white undershirt.  I advise staining the shirt with orange dye in various places, and maybe smear a little bit of chile somewhere on it.  Next, you need to buy a belt with a large gold buckle, preferably in the shape of either Texas, Mississippi, Tennessee or Alabama.  Then you need to buy a trucker hat (IE one of those square-ish baseball hats that's mesh in the back) with either the confederate flag or the John Deer Tractor logo on it.  You should also get a yellow highlighter and go over your fingernails with it, and dig them in the dirt- same with toes.  A fake eyebrow ring would really accessorize beautifully; preferably gold to match your belt buckle.  You should also cut the jeans- not a smooth cut, but use like crappy scissors for that authentic "I done torn 'em on some scrap metal" look.  If you can, rub some rust/grass on your jeans too, and fray the cuffs.  Also, tear the seams on one of your back pockets so it sorta flops around back there.  You need one of those big, long cans of beer, preferably Coors Light.  If you can tolerate it, smoke profusely, and if you have a graduation ring, wear it proudly.  Try to borrow a second or third even from your friends.


Hope this helps.

[pianistimo]

soliloquy,  for such a quiet guy - this outburst.  it's inexplicable.

[soliloquy]

soliloquy,  for such a quiet guy - this outburst.  it's inexplicable.

I'm not quite o.o  I probably have some of the longest posts on this forum.  You just never see them because they're actually about piano

[rc]

Gold soliloquy!  Thanks!

That's all do-able.  Except for the smoking, but my friends will take care of that.  There may even be an opprotunity to genuinely tear up the jeans!  Gonna be a fun Halloween.

Who else is dressing up?