terrible dates

[pianistimo]

really nothing.  just a late start that was all my fault.

[pianistimo]

perhaps this is a question about readiness.  what time do most of you who live in large cities (london, philly, nyc) get ready for an 8 pm concert?  i suppose it depends on how far away and how much traffic - but we live about 30 miles outside of philly.  so, to me, leaving at 3 or 4 seemed too early.  now,i'm thinking - ok - maybe 4:00 next time. 

now, should i sort of apologize again.  maybe say - i'm sorry for crying like it was all your fault.  next time i'll be ready around 4 and we'll get to eat dinner.  but, for some reason today - i'm not really sorry.  i should try to be.  i guess what makes me angry is that he seems to have little patience when it comes to anything impacting a 'schedule.'  i think he should be flexible - and just be nice. 

[elspeth]

I missed dinner pre-show a couple of weeks back, but mine was due to railway problems which I muttered darkly about on another thread... lots depends of relative distances (home - restaurant - theatre) and how you're getting across those distances... I have it easy if I'm going to concerts in my own home city as I only have to cover six miles into town and I'm sorted, so if I were meeting people for dinner before an 8pm show I probably wouldn't leave home till about 5.30.

[pianistimo]

2.5 hours x 5 = 12 hours.  according to this plan - we would need to leave at 8 am.  this is getting worse instead of better.  just kidding.  i know i should listen to my hsuband about leaving early - but to me it's like being at the airport and waiting all day for a flight.  maybe next time we plan what we'll do besides eating.  go to the art museum or something and walk aroiund for a few hours.  the thing is, we have children at home.  and, who knows what would happen being gone so long.

[ada]

I someone gave me such a hard time about being late that he made me cry I would leave him, possibly for another orange.  Life is too short if you are miserable.

[pianistimo]

the thing is that he's quite good in bed.  not just that, either.  we get along well most of the time.  just when we try to plan things to go out.  it seems that lately i have a lot of idealized things in my head - and they don't work out the same way as i planned. 

[ada]

the thing is that he's quite good in bed. 

yeah, but so are lots of people 

[pianistimo]

but don't you want 'romance' too.  sometimes i think he thinks that i think romance is 'getting there on time.' what if we completely missed the turnoff and missed the concert.  couldn't we make due?  why do things have to be on time and on cue?  fireworks don't go off on cue.  well, sometimes theydo.

he's getting a little bit older now - so my plan for next time:
give him up to two beers
drive
take him to a really unlikely destination
force him to be creative
take a room at the top floor of the hotel and leave the curtains open like he's always dreamed
order room service at 3 am
get up at noon
do nothing - i mean no newspapers, tv, books, magazines  (take away his glasses)

[ada]

but don't you want 'romance' too. 

Not all the time    Romance is a tool of male oppression.

Okay, I'm just being facetious. But what is romance? Isn't it just a glorified form of lust?

And please don't take my comments too seriously, P. I am not a qualified marriage counsellor.  Maybe that's what you need. I hope it works out.

[pianistimo]

if it's that workable a tool - why don't they use it more efficiently?

definition of romance to me:

no time limits
no cell phone
no involved detail about the latest ymca workout and how many miles one went
no work related incidents
no lame jokes

full attention.

[ahinton]

definition of romance to me:

no time limits
no cell phone
no involved detail about the latest ymca workout and how many miles one went
no work related incidents
no lame jokes

full attention.

Is that all you expect of it? (not that I'd know a "ymca workout" if one came and hit me on the nose, but...)

Best,

Alistair

[ahinton]

I someone gave me such a hard time about being late that he made me cry I would leave him, possibly for another orange.  Life is too short if you are miserable.

Really? Mightn't such an experience put you off oranges altogether?

Best,

Alistair

[ahinton]

Not all the time    Romance is a tool of male oppression.

Okay, I'm just being facetious.

Yes. We noticed!

But what is romance? Isn't it just a glorified form of lust?

If it were so, then - as the old cliché goes - "romance would be dead" - and lust would probably be teminally ill as well...

And please don't take my comments too seriously, P. I am not a qualified marriage counsellor.  Maybe that's what you need. I hope it works out.

That's not for me to say, but, if so, what might the marriage counsellor need?

Best,

Alistair