Agony Column

[gilad]

Im 25 and have not loved much in my life. have had a strange friendship with this lady friend. She tried to kiss me twice and stuff etc. But then we moved into the friend zone, and I couldnt help but start have feelings for her.Ive never told her, but i think she may have noticed and seems to be avoiding me. Im pissed of to say the least. Hurt is where I am at most.
I dont want to contact her again unless she contacts me. I cant stop thinking about her. Its really wasting a lot of my time and thoughts.
Any of you been here before?
How do I forget about this beautiful flower I once had in my mind, that has now turned into a ferocious and aggresive weed?
the sh*t part about it is that we saw each other all the time, and now i have this blank spot, a void excuse the cliche.
The rejection feels aweful, and the thing that gets me most, is i did nothing wrong.
I never made any sort of suttle or overt gestures towards her.
Im pretty convinced she is poison anyway, that is judging by how she treats men. Like that have no feelings. But how do I put her behind me?
jeez. The agony.

[gilad]

Its all good. thanks, we are now a couple.
I thought it would be a nice change of conversation from all the sh*t thats been plaguing this forum lately. I guess not!
Anyway, im really happy.

[pianistimo]

dear gilad,

i actually responded to your post yesterday - but lost the post.  good thing.  i was telling you to just forget about her. especially since you  seemed to just appreciate having her as a close friend and brushed off the two kisses she tried to give you.  also, when you said 'she is poison anyways' - it made me think 'hmm.  ok.  whatever.' 

now - she is not? 

yesterday - i wrote - 'gildad, you should read the tabloids.  they'll make you feel better.'  i read yesterday (at the hair salon) that britney has three guys that she can't make up her mind about.  one is the 55 hour las vegas marriage guy, justin - longtime friend, and keith her recent hubby.  but, with custody battles and drug rehabs - i think she's just plain mixed up.  i was saying - 'go read a tabloid.  it will make you feel much better about your own life.'  and also, 'don't feel badly - maybe you're right about your inner voice.'

[living_stradivarius]

The rejection feels aweful, and the thing that gets me most, is i did nothing wrong.

Perhaps doing nothing is what's wrong .
Love will pass you by if you don't take the first step. Better to have closure than uncertainty. Send her flowers or a porsche , whichever is more practical.

[pianistimo]

well, there's no doubt women like money. but, hey, she tried to kiss you for no reason at all twice.  shut your eyes and just accept it.  i mean, if you want it.  seems to me that when i read between the lines - you want to keep her as a good friend for a while.  if she can't handle just being good friends and insists on rushing you - maybe you're right that she's not that serious and would just give you problems later.

i tell my son 'don't marry before age 28-30.'  you don't realize how young 24 is!  get your kitchen appliances and a couch, etc.  and, ps - women really like it when men know how to clean up after themselves.  you'll never know how much of a turn-on it is.   (although, this will bode ill for my son.  perhaps he'll never get married for that reason).

[gilad]

Well, I'm doing some handiwork and repairs in my house tomorrow if that counts?
Actually its an experiment, i have to fix my chest of drawers.
Yeah im going to cool it with this girl.
I know she is a player, she is so a player.
She will do no good for me, but i wouldnt mind a bit of romance.
Anyway, thanks you two.
What you both say is to true.
What ive learned is that the "friend zone" is a bad thing. You cant be friends with women. It breaks your heart if you fall for them, and when they get a boyfriend etc.
But im going to play back with this one.
Its a first for me. I dont like games. But game on!
Thanks again you two.
Haha. Living S - Ill buy her an island.

[nicco]

What ive learned is that the "friend zone" is a bad thing. You cant be friends with women. It breaks your heart if you fall for them, and when they get a boyfriend etc.

If you happen to like the girl, this is so true! But if you dont feel anything for her, then friendship is absolutely possible, given that both realize there are no feelings there.

[elspeth]

I really hope it works out for you! You never know, you might be the one who makes her realise she doesn't want to be a player any more...

I agree about being friends can make things difficult if you fancy the other person... but, on the other hand, you still have to pick someone you can be friends with as well as the romance. No point loving someone you don't actually like.

[thalbergmad]

Women, Women, Women.

Can't do without them.

Thal

[pianistimo]

calling someone a 'ferocious and agressive weed' when angry at them is  agood indication that maybe you have feelings for her.  'me thinks thou protesteth too much.'

on the other hand -there are women that aren't quite so agressive as to try twice to kiss a man.  in fact, just the fact she attempted once is quite brazen.  i think the most agressive thing i ever did when your age was to try to take a fortune cookie fortune out of this guys shirt pocket through the car window.  he thought i was suddenly groping for him.  i told him - no, i just wanted to see what your fortune was.

[rach n bach]

Can't do without them.

Can't do with them either sometimes...


I agree with you on both points pianistimo.

[gilad]

she has gone weird again. I want no more to do with her.
I went out tonight and tried my luck with some ladies, i failed every time.
But it was very liberating. And I had some good laughs.

[thalbergmad]

Sounds like you are better off without her.

There are plenty more fish in the sea.

Thal

[gilad]

oh yes there are. thanks Thal.
I had to make my self aware of that.
It really helped me to post on here.
I may have invested my heart in a friendship and relationship that gave no return back to me.
But as I have learnt and always say.
Nothing is lost in life.
If you look beyond failure and mishappenings, you will see that everything has a lesson, and beneficial outcome, from heart break, to illnesses, to anything.
Thanks all.

[living_stradivarius]

"If music be the food of love, play on;
Give me excess of it, that, surfeiting,
The appetite may sicken, and so die."

Ask Shakespeare young Orsino

[thalbergmad]

"If music be the food of love, play on;

If music be the food of love, why don't rabbits play banjos?

Thal

[pianowolfi]

If music be the food of love, why don't rabbits play banjos?

Thal

Well they're just too busy making love, where should they get time to practice?

[gilad]

Rabbits prefer Wood wind ro banjos.

[rach n bach]

Rabbits prefer Wood wind to banjos.

That was low... real low... 

[thalbergmad]

Must be daft creatures.

Thal

[lichristine]

bottom line in my opinion?  SOOOOOOO many females are annoying. Not worth it. (no offense all women/girls here, this is not a general statement, really...)

[rach n bach]

bottom line in my opinion?  SOOOOOOO many females are annoying. Not worth it. (no offense all women/girls here, this is not a general statement, really...)

LOL!

Gotta love it!   

[living_stradivarius]

bottom line in my opinion?  SOOOOOOO many females are annoying. Not worth it. (no offense all women/girls here, this is not a general statement, really...)

Are you suggesting that he turn gay and invoke the wrath of god instead of a woman's heart?

[lichristine]

no. well, unles he actually was gay! in which case i hope he wouldn't deny himself....(sorry for talking about yo in third person in your own thread,  gilad!)
i suggest he not waste agony on something like a girl. Save it for bad cover songs.

[gilad]

HAhaha all very funny posts. Anbd so true lichristine about many women being annoying. They think they are a level above us.

[zheer]

   Ewwwwwwwwwww you got to be kidding with this love thing. Few fall in love the majority just wont some bara bing bara bong. You might have a crush on her,but love takes time. If you wont to clear you head just have some bara bing bara bong.

[thalbergmad]

 just have some bara bing bara bong.

I don't know what that is, but it sure sounds fun.

Thal

[leahcim]

She tried to kiss me twice and stuff etc....Hurt is where I am at most.

It sounds like you have things back to front so to speak. But if you switch places and you stuff instead, the pain you were having will probably quickly disappear.

[zheer]

I don't know what that is,

  It's ding dong.

[thalbergmad]

It sounds like you have things back to front so to speak. But if you switch places and you stuff instead, the pain you were having will probably quickly disappear.

And where have you been for the last few months?

Thal

[leahcim]

And where have you been for the last few months?

Setting up my new internet web site selling New perspectives in theological debate at new perspectives in theological debate the stuff folk haven't mentioned yet...no really dot co dot uk.

I was told I didn't know my market, had little financial knowledge and didn't even understand the difference between gross and net profit....but I'll show Theo and those other dragons.

Still mostly failing to play anything vaguely musical on the piano too although it hurts a lot less.

[thalbergmad]

Still mostly failing to play anything vaguely musical on the piano too although it hurts a lot less.

That must be a good sign.

Thal

[gilad]

good to see leahcim

[thalbergmad]

Indeed, this forum needs wit.

Thal

[alwaystheangel]

women suck. so do men (as thal can attest to) lol Im kidding. 
Um yeah, gilad, get over her, she's toxic, and she's be great to mess around with but thats as far as it should go as apparently that's all she wants to do.  I get that. I mean who really wants a serious relationship at that age. Might aswell get the experience now so you can be a great lover for the love of your life.  at least Im pretty sure that's her thinking.

Women are all b*tches.  As any woman will tell you herself and if she doesn't she is even more dangerous because then you know she's a liar too


I don't know what i'm trying to say.  Ill stop

Just get over her.  Best way to get revenge and get over someone is to find someone else. (Someone that MEANS something, mind you)

[lichristine]

Anbd so true lichristine about many women being annoying. They think they are a level above us.

key word: think.

Women are all b*tches. 

I'm not sure about ALL.

[gilad]

haha alwaystheangel your post is exactly my new felt sentiment. Way to go girl.

[alwaystheangel]

lol I'm just stating the obvious.  We are b*tches. those that don't think so are liars and b*tches. lol 

And yes ALL of them are lichristine, you might not realize it because you're a guy and don't see how women operate when men aren't around.  There is a reason I have like two female friends and the rest are guys.  Guys are so much more straight-forward, none of that backstabbing shi*t.

[pianowolfi]

Well I actually don't agree because some of my most wonderful friends are women. Women can be really good friends to a guy, this is something that I realized during my life. Ok I admit that some of them complain about other women or fellows who intrigate or backstab but these are by far not all women, just some.

[rach n bach]

Us guys see straight forward with no back-stabbing?  HA!

Yeah, girls can be a pain in the butt, that's just something you have to watch out for.  Yes, women do tend to spread stuff around more, but again, that's something that you can't change and you're just going to have to live with it. 

So do I really trust girls?  Kinda.  I still manage several of them as "friends" and it does work for me.  I just don't give them too much to go crapping around about...

RnB

[thalbergmad]

And yes ALL of them are lichristine, you might not realize it because you're a guy

Judging by the pictures thread, i think i can safely say that lichristine is not a guy.

Thal

[rach n bach]

Ditto that... and add to that some disscussions in the chat...   

RnB

[living_stradivarius]

Wow, so many people here speak so poorly of women. Guess that shows how well versed pianists are in the sonata of love.

[lichristine]

lol I'm just stating the obvious.  We are b*tches. those that don't think so are liars and b*tches. lol 

And yes ALL of them are lichristine,

what the hell is wrong with the gals where you live?

Judging by the pictures thread, i think i can safely say that lichristine is not a guy.

Thal

true dat. I've been female through and through for as long as i can remember! (and hopefully i bit before that as well. >.>)

[alwaystheangel]

sorry about that li for some reason I thought you were a guy with a feminine user name. lol :$

Maybe I just don't like female company.  I like guys, they are so much bawdier and gay ones give you the best of both worlds! haahhaha.

[thalbergmad]

I like guys,

I expect most guys like you my little Canadian Cutie.

Thal

[pianowolfi]

I expect most guys like you my little Canadian Cutie.

Thal

Behave old chap, she could be your daughter

[thalbergmad]

Could be your granddaughter.

[rach n bach]

Could be my girlfriend   

[pianowolfi]

Could be your granddaughter.

Lol roflmao this is just legendary.  What's next? Great-granddaughter? Great-great-big-huge-overdimensional daughter? LOL