The Sound of Music

[thalbergmad]

For the 578th time, BBC1 have decided to screen this rubbish again.

Has a worse film ever been made?

Awful songs, bad acting and Julie Bloody Andrews.

It would have been much better if the Nazi's had captured the entire family and sent them to Dachau. The film could then have ended with Julie Andrews being strung up with piano wire whilst singing "climb every mountain".

I hate every single frame of this bilge and hope that in years to come it is erased from the history of musicals.

Happy Easter.

Thal

[elspeth]

I've never seen it, I'm quite proud of that feat! The closest I've come was being on duty when 'Singalonga Sound of Music' was on at the theatre I work in - they projected it onto a big screen with the words along the bottom kareoke-style, and there were prizes for the members of the audience in the best costumes, and they all got goodie bags with eidelweiss, and party poppers to let off when Maria and the Captain first kiss... I was too busy to see any of it, which I was very glad of! You've never seen so many middle-aged men in wimples and stockings... really, I ought to get danger money for some of the shows I work on...

[cmg]

For the 578th time, BBC1 have decided to screen this rubbish again.

Has a worse film ever been made?

Awful songs, bad acting and Julie Bloody Andrews.

It would have been much better if the Nazi's had captured the entire family and sent them to Dachau. The film could then have ended with Julie Andrews being strung up with piano wire whilst singing "climb every mountain".

I hate every single frame of this bilge and hope that in years to come it is erased from the history of musicals.

Happy Easter.

Thal

Uh-oh.  Thal's got his cranky pants on.  Let's cheer him up with a singalong!  Ready, kids?

"Rain drops on roses and thumb screws on Julie!
Treacle and saccharine and dear nuns aplenty!"

etc.

Okay, kids, you finish it!!  But just remember that Christopher Plummer (The Captain) always referred to Thal's favorite film as "The Sound of Mucus."  Honor his spirit in your inventive lyrics!

[pianistimo]

thal, that is a terrible thing to say.  i suppose if you were watching it to get tips on how to climb the alps and not get your clothes dirty - it would be helpful.  or if you were expecting julie andrews to get naked (not).  but, hey - this was a kids movie anyways.  and, for the record - i think it is unusual for a star to actually be able to sing.  isn't that julie andrews actual voice.  see if you can get a porn star to sing.  that would be bilge. 

for the story that they were using - i don't think any cast could have done any better.  'the lonely goatherd' song that was used for the marionette part is where i learned to yodel with the high tones at the end.  i use it whenever a newb is on the bike trail and i suddenly come up on them on the right side of the road and they're going the other direction on that side.  of course, this wouldn't work in england.  at least they look up.  it's the high notes that do it.  gets people to pay attention.  i think, also, the singing is what got the von trapp family to put 'one foot in front of the other.'  to escape the nazi's as an entire family was a feat that not many others were so successful at.

anyways, thal - you have no imagination.  can't you imagine how it must have been for poor mr von trappe.  all those children.  not many nannies care that much anymores to do things with children that increase mind power.  you'd have to pay a lot for a maria. 

and what about those scenic pictures of the alps.  i suppose that doesn't affect you either.  i always think of the clean and clear snow and water.  you know, like ricola.  clear tones and clear sky and water.  what do you call that looooonnng horn they blow?  anyways, i think swiss people are nice, too.  they always put things back in the right place. 

[amanfang]

Yeah, it's pretty dumb.  However, it has its moments of "charm."  Sort of.  Anyway, the thing I hate is the little parts of phrases that inevitably get stuck in my head for days. 

[ahinton]

As one for whom the entire genre of the American musical does little for me unless it has the name West Side Story on the front (though the same composer's two ...Town examples are more than worthwhile, I think), I am arguably far from the ideal person to pronounce on The Sound of Music, but whilst I do not go as far as Thal does here, I have to confess that, although I've never actually seen the thing, I do find what I've heard of it to be more nauseating than anything else perpetrated by Rodgers and Hammerstein or Hart:

Brown paper bags placed before mouth and nose;
This is NOT one of my favourite shows...

Best,

Alistair

[wishful thinker]

My my, Thal, if its so bad why watch it?  After all, it came out about the time that you were born, so maybe you would have forgotten it by now if you'd seen it only once? 

BTW, pianistimo, Julie Andrews was a trained opera singer.  She is also the singer on My Fair Lady.

And I rather like them both, in a sort of rainy day with nothing else to do (is there ever such a time?) sort of way 

[pianistimo]

interesting!  i always thought that it was audrey hepburn's own voice.  i guess not every beautiful woman has a good voice.  i mean look at jessica simpson.  she's a hottie - but her voice is terrible.  and she has the audacity to try to make cd's.

[ahinton]

Julie Andrews's voice is far from being the worst thing about The Sound of Music and, indeed, André Previn has been very complimentary about her diction, etc. Whilst it's still not good enough to redeem the show from itself (what would be?), she does what's it calls for about as well as it could be done, I think - and whilst one might well question why she agreed to appear in the thing in the first place, it's hardly her fault that the material allotted to her is so incredibly naff. Someone once described Richard Rodgers as the "non-thinking man's Aaron Copland"; I could comment, but I won't, other than to wonder who the non-thinking man's Elliott Carter might be...

Best,

Alistair

[wishful thinker]

We're not talking high art here, for goodness sake, it's light entertainment. 

As such it works for a lot of people.  If it doesn't work for you, fine, but then if you have never seen it, how could you possibly comment?

I have never heard a work by an obscure brit composer called Alistair Hinton, so I wouldn't dare to say it was utter tosh, now would I? 

[ahinton]

We're not talking high art here, for goodness sake, it's light entertainment. 

As such it works for a lot of people.  If it doesn't work for you, fine, but then if you have never seen it, how could you possibly comment?

I have never heard a work by an obscure brit composer called Alistair Hinton, so I wouldn't dare to say it was utter tosh, now would I? 

Hey - keep you hair on! What I said was that my view - which is not a value judgement so much as a personal opinion - was based upon having heard quite a lot of its content which, whilst that does not of course give me a full overview, it does provide sufficient to turn me well off it. I never suggested that it was, or pretended to be, "high art"; I don't even think that West Side Story seeks to be that either, but it is a strong, splendid and engaging work by comparison.

The comparison with the other composer that you mention doesn't hold water here, either; you've apparently heard nothing at all of his work, whereas I have at least heard quite abit of The Sound of Music...

Best,

Alistair

[cmg]

BTW, pianistimo, Julie Andrews was a trained opera singer.  She is also the singer on My Fair Lady.

If you mean that Julie Andrews was "the singer on My Fair Lady," then you must mean the stage play.  The film version with Audrey Hepburn featured the voice of Marni Nixon singing the Eliza role.  Hepburn lip-synched.

More revolting trivia:  Marni Nixon then went on to appear in The Sound of Music (film version) as one of those nuns.  A minor role, but a major bit of irony given that Andrews was passed up for the film version of My Fair Lady, which Hepburn got but couldn't sing, and Marni Nixon was hired to fill in as Hepburn's pipes.  Is that clear now?  Is anyone awake?

Thal?  Anyone?

"Climb evr'y Etude!
Ford evr'y Fugue!"

etc.

[cmg]

Hey - keep you hair on!
Best,

Alistair

"And underneath her wimple, she has curlers in her hair.
"Maria's not an asset to the abbey!"

See how insidious this show is?  It's so ubiquitous in the US you hear it constantly.  Like "Messiah."  Which, by the way, has anti-semitic overtones, particluarly in the "Hallelujah Chorus."  For further details, please reference Walter Ramsey's post on the Miscellaneous portion of this forum.

[ahinton]

"Climb evr'y Etude!
Ford evr'y Fugue!"

"Follow all sonatas
'Till it makes you scream!"

Best,

Alistair

[cmg]

"Follow all sonatas
'Till it makes you scream!"

Best,

Alistair

"How do you solve a problem like Sorabji?
How do you catch a wave upon the sand?"

[wishful thinker]

How do you solve a problem like Sorabji?

Some ointment from Boots should do the trick 

[ahinton]

"How do you solve a problem like Sorabji?
How do you catch a wave upon the sand?"

I dunno; how DO you solve (etc., etc.)?...

Maybe you don't bother; maybe instead you simply say to yourself

"Why would I care about such silly problems
When I could listen to "Strike Up The Band".

By George, that's more like it!

Best,

Alistair

[cmg]

I have never heard a work by an obscure brit composer called Alistair Hinton, so I wouldn't dare to say it was utter tosh, now would I? 

Of course you wouldn't, and you shouldn't!  And "obscure" is unfair -- I'm a no-nuthin' Yank and I've been working on one of his piano compositions for weeks now.  I can personally attest to its very great merit as I am sure many others can. 

[wishful thinker]

Pace!  Scherzo! 

[cmg]

Pace!  Scherzo! 

Oh, don't mind me.  This particular composer, though expert at writing notes for other horn players to blow, never blows his own.  A gentleman by definition.

Thought I'd blow his horn for him.  His music is wonderful.  I think Forum members should explore it more fully, that's all.

Pace!

[ronde_des_sylphes]

thal, that is a terrible thing to say.  i suppose if you were watching it to get tips on how to climb the alps and not get your clothes dirty - it would be helpful.  or if you were expecting julie andrews to get naked (not). 

For that "pleasure", I reccommend S.O.B.

Still, Thal's remake of the film might be amusing..

A while back Private Eye  (a UK satirical magazine who are no strangers to bad taste  ) did a spoof song listing from a hypothetical musical called "Fred West Side Story" (for non-UK readers, he was a serial killer). It included such "gems" as "I Feel Pretty Homicidal".

[thalbergmad]

For that "pleasure", I reccommend S.O.B.

Probably her best film. At least she gets her bits out.

I don't detest all her films, i rather enjoyed "Thoroughly Modern Millie" and "Star" where she played Gertrude Lawrence.

"How do you solve a problem like ahinton?"

I will work on these lyrics later.

Thal

[pianistimo]

julie andrews got naked?  what is the world coming to? 

fred west side story?  this is getting worse by the minute.  i stand by the old movies much more than the new.  they don't use sex for the climax of every movie.  i mean, it's more discreet.  more romantic - or whatever the movie is about. 

[ahinton]

Probably her best film. At least she gets her bits out.

I don't detest all her films, i rather enjoyed "Thoroughly Modern Millie" and "Star" where she played Gertrude Lawrence.

I thought The Tamarind Seed to be her best, actually...

"How do you solve a problem like ahinton?"

By buying all his CDs and scors and familiarising yourslf wth them first in order to figure out the precise nature of that "problem", if indeed there is one in the first place...

I will work on these lyrics later.

We'll all wait with bated - er - hmmm...

Best,

Alistair

[ahinton]

they don't use sex for the climax

Sorry to decontextualise you, but once again it's the way you write it, Susan...

Dear me - let's move on...

Best,

Alistair

[thalbergmad]

I thought The Tamarind Seed to be her best, actually...

Oh, did she get her bits out in that one?

Thal

[nicco]

Gimme 1 good reason to watch a musical.

[danny elfboy]

Haha ... what kind of snobs are you all.
It may seem like a good way to appear smart to you, but the emperor is naked and at the end all you see is a bunch of pathethical snobs :p

[ahinton]

Gimme 1 good reason to watch a musical.

West Side Story. That's three times as many as you asked for, I know, but they're the only ones I can think of...

Best,

Alistair

[ahinton]

Oh, did she get her bits out in that one?

Thal

You'll just have to watch it and see.

Best,

Alistair

[cmg]

Gimme 1 good reason to watch a musical.

"Gypsy."  There's one reason.  It's actually the Great American Opera, featuring a stage mother who makes Godzilla look like Bambi. 

Vocally, the lead role is the "Norma" of the American musical and any good performance leaves you with the awareness that the so-called American Dream is truly a nightmare . . . as if you needed a musical to tell you THAT. 

And if you need TWO reasons, check out Sondheim.  Especially "Sweeney Tod."  A night in the theater doesn't get any better than this.  

[pianistimo]

kismet is another good reason.  i really liked that one.

[thalbergmad]

I can tolerate Oaklahoma and Seven Brides for Seven Brothers and i even like South Pacific.

High Society is a good one and i can even watch Fred & Ginger.

Strange as it may seem, the only one i hate more than the Sound of Music is that Dustbin of noises that Mr Hinton seems to like.

Thal

[ahinton]

I can tolerate Oaklahoma and Seven Brides for Seven Brothers and i even like South Pacific.

High Society is a good one and i can even watch Fred & Ginger.

Strange as it may seem, the only one i hate more than the Sound of Music is that Dustbin of noises that Mr Hinton seems to like.

Shame upon thee. The first named is spelt Oklahoma, by the way and it does little for me, any more than do the other two in the paragraph. High Society, like the best of its composer's other shows, has plenty of fine songs (as if one could expect less from a master like Cole Porter) but, like some of Gershwin's musicals, they don't really add up to a satisfying whole, to my mind.

Best,

Alistair

[living_stradivarius]

Uh-oh.  Thal's got his cranky pants on.  Let's cheer him up with a singalong!  Ready, kids?

"Rain drops on roses and thumb screws on Julie!
Treacle and saccharine and dear nuns aplenty!"

etc.

Okay, kids, you finish it!!  But just remember that Christopher Plummer (The Captain) always referred to Thal's favorite film as "The Sound of Mucus."  Honor his spirit in your inventive lyrics!

How about some "Springtime for Hitler?"

[ahinton]

How about some "Springtime for Hitler?"

Ah, yes - The Prodoocers; there's an operatic version called Primavera per Mussolini (although no doubt Alessandra of that ilk is probably suing for copyright as we speak)...

Best,

Alistair

[cmg]

Oh, did she get her bits out in that one?

Thal

Before this thread drifts off to oblivion, I just remembered another Julie Andrews epic where she gets her bits out:  "Duet for One."  It's a riff on the Jacqueline DuPre/Barenboim marriage, but Julie plays a violinist here to Allen Bates' something-or-other.

And not only does she get her bits out, she flings them about in bed with a junk collector, played by what's-his-name, uh, Natasha Richardson's hubby.

From pristine to soft-core porn in one career.  That'll teach her for leaving that convent.

[mikey6]

She was good in 10, everyone BUT her gets neked - frankly I don't think her neked would be a particularly great site

[wishful thinker]

From pristine to soft-core porn in one career.  That'll teach her for leaving that convent.

Andrews hated being type cast as a sugary sweet, virgin next door type, so she went out of her way to get into flicks where she could try and shock people out of their pre-conceptions.

Being married to a film producer helped, but does that make old Blakey a bit of a pimp?