Starting a New Religion

[rimv2]

Ah is starting a new religion. All who accept this new faith must worship, and accept the love of moi. Those who do not, must suffer a most horrid fate. Life without moi.

Pour your hearts out to moi.

Ask me a question and ah shall give you advicesis.

[ahinton]

Ah is starting a new religion. All who accept this new faith must worship, and accept the love of moi. Those who do not, must suffer a most horrid fate. Life without moi.

Pour your hearts out to moi.

Ask me a question and ah shall give you advicesis.

The question that this AH has to ask is "why does anyone need yet another one?...

Best,

Alistair

[rimv2]

The question that this AH has to ask is "why does anyone need yet another one?...

Best,

Alistair

You can never have too many.

Next question

[counterpoint]

Ask me a question and ah shall give you advicesis.

Why should I "love" and worship someone, whom I don't know and who supposedly isn't interested in me at all?  

[ahinton]

You can never have too many.

I can - and so can many others.

Best,

Alistair

[rimv2]

Why should I "love" and worship someone, whom I don't know and who supposedly isn't interested in me at all? 

Love is a two way street. But one cannot gain something with first giving. The assumption that ah have no interest in you, is one formed from insecurity. Give yourself to moi. And be filled with fearlessness and love

I can - and so can many others.

Best,

Alistair

This is true. As there are many who would willing go into the darkness.

[shortyshort]

When I think about any religion Ah certainly comes into my head. AHHHHHHHHHHHH. 

[rimv2]

When I think about any religion Ah certainly comes into my head. AHHHHHHHHHHHH. 

That's right. Shout it out!!!

Next question

[shortyshort]

If I worship you, can I have some more fingers? 

Please AH 

[rimv2]

If I worship you, can I have some more fingers? 

Please AH 

No. You have been given all you need to get by. As long as you have my love you need nothing more

Next question.

[counterpoint]

Love is a two way street. But one cannot gain something with first giving. The assumption that ah have no interest in you, is one formed from insecurity. Give yourself to moi. And be filled with fearlessness and love

Yes, I'm very insecure.  You want my money too...? 

[pianistimo]

rimv2 has not disclosed enough information about himself to garner worldwide respect.  we need to see some power.  can you part the sea?  can you 'boot' the sun.  can you maintain the entire earth?  temperatures included?  can you time a woman's delivery of a baby?  can you give the baby life outside the womb (which happens to be completely different than inside).  can you show an example of love by crucifixion for the entire world (before which you would be flogged to a point of exhaustion and then asked to carry a cross that was way to heavy for you?  are you still scared of death?  if so - you cannot be a 'god.'  God is beyond death.  not living on this earth.  the earth would be a 'footstool' to you.  also, the tiniest elements of the earth would be as perfect as the large.  every snowflake would still be different under your command.

[pianistimo]

'thou shall have no other gods before ME.'  I AM.  *note, i do not want people to worship me, susan. 

ps when i had to recite the 10 commandments, this one always got me.  say, did you know that it is thought that joseph was called Im hotep - or yuseph or yuya?  his wife (daughter of priest of on - aseneth).  anyway - 'im' means the God I AM.  so he worshipped that God instead of the pharoah in egypt. it was a miracle in itself that he kept a position of power and actually converted aseneth from worshipping egyptian gods to the true God in a matter of a week.  this is recorded in 'the story of joseph and aseneth.'  he married this woman and had two sons (recorded in the bible AND egyptian history).  they were 'royal' sons and they were all buried royally and found inthe valley of the kings.  yuya and tuya (sp?) were joseph and aseneth as far as i can tell.  the exhibit showed a statue of joseph holding (instead of the hook and flail of eygpt) a scroll with the inscription 'God, Father.'  that means he believed in God the Father.  not egyptian gods.  this was interesting.  his pottery also showed no symbology of egyptian gods.

[rimv2]

Yes, I'm very insecure.  You want my money too...? 

Admittance is always good. Now give self to moi

can you part the sea?  can you 'boot' the sun.  can you maintain the entire earth?  temperatures included?  can you time a woman's delivery of a baby?  can you give the baby life outside the womb (which happens to be completely different than inside).  can you show an example of love by crucifixion for the entire world (before which you would be flogged to a point of exhaustion and then asked to carry a cross that was way to heavy for you?  are you still scared of death?  if so - you cannot be a 'god.'  God is beyond death.  not living on this earth.  the earth would be a 'footstool' to you.  also, the tiniest elements of the earth would be as perfect as the large.  every snowflake would still be different under your command.

Uh...yeah.... >_>

That's meh, duh

'thou shall have no other gods before ME.'  I AM.  *note, i do not want people to worship me, susan. 

Yep, meh again

Next question

[pianogeek_cz]

What is the Ultimate Prayer of Ah?

Is it 42x AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA?

[soliloquy]

Those who do not, must suffer a most horrid fate. Life without moi.

I already like this religion.  I do not join.

[wotgoplunk]

Ah is starting a new religion. All who accept this new faith must worship, and accept the love of moi. Those who do not, must suffer a most horrid fate. Life without moi.

Pour your hearts out to moi.

Ask me a question and ah shall give you advicesis.

Why should I abandon the Church of the Celestial Teapot for your religion? How do we know you have the truth?

[rimv2]

What is the Ultimate Prayer of Ah?

Is it 42x AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA?

The ultimate prayer. Ultimate prayers are themes left for lesser gods. They have that ego think going on. It' like so, ek

I already like this religion.  I do not join.

Yes, you have been given this choice. But know the fate you must endure.

Why should I abandon the Church of the Celestial Teapot for your religion? How do we know you have the truth?

The Celestial Teapot ?

You actually worship that jerk!? He still owes meh fifty souls.

Next question

[G.W.K]

What is the name of this religion? Surely there must be a better name than "AH"?

rimv2 has not disclosed enough information about himself to garner worldwide respect. we need to see some power. can you part the sea? can you 'boot' the sun. can you maintain the entire earth? temperatures included? can you time a woman's delivery of a baby? can you give the baby life outside the womb (which happens to be completely different than inside). can you show an example of love by crucifixion for the entire world (before which you would be flogged to a point of exhaustion and then asked to carry a cross that was way to heavy for you? are you still scared of death? if so - you cannot be a 'god.' God is beyond death. not living on this earth. the earth would be a 'footstool' to you. also, the tiniest elements of the earth would be as perfect as the large. every snowflake would still be different under your command.

I'm sorry rimv2...but I have to admit with pianistimo. That is a very good point and I agree with it even though I do not follow a set religion. I only believe in an afterlife, not a God. I am sorry to offend anyone but that is my belief. I am agnostic, I do not follow God, only believe in resurrection.

G.W.K

[jlh]

Why does AH need me?  Why are you deserving of my worship above all other gods?

Who is Moi?  Do you have some kind of deity duality?  Do you have multiple personality disorder?

[rimv2]

Why does AH need me?  Why are you deserving of my worship above all other gods?

Who is Moi?  Do you have some kind of deity duality?  Do you have multiple personality disorder?

Your questioning of moi, shows a lack of faith. Give yourself unto moi, and know that your life shall be filled with love. And you shall know moi at the time of your end.

What is the name of this religion? Surely there must be a better name than "AH"?

I'm sorry rimv2...but I have to admit with pianistimo. That is a very good point and I agree with it even though I do not follow a set religion. I only believe in an afterlife, not a God. I am sorry to offend anyone but that is my belief. I am agnostic, I do not follow God, only believe in resurrection.

G.W.K

Yes young one. The freedom to choose is given to all.

[wotgoplunk]

The Celestial Teapot ?

You actually worship that jerk!? He still owes meh fifty souls.

He will spare you during the second coming of the Teapot if you waive the debt

[rimv2]

He will spare you during the second coming of the Teapot if you waive the debt

That chump? Whatever

That's the lowest of the lesser gods.

But ahve given you freedom of choice and os if you choose to worship  that shmuck , do so. But know you will be without mah  love and you shalt only know suffering.

Or repent in you ways and join moi?

Next question

[pianolearner]

Ah is starting a new religion. All who accept this new faith must worship, and accept the love of moi. Those who do not, must suffer a most horrid fate. Life without moi.

Pour your hearts out to moi.

Ask me a question and ah shall give you advicesis.

This isn't one of those boring religions where promiscuity and drugs are forbidden is it?

[rimv2]

This isn't one of those boring religions where promiscuity and drugs are forbidden is it?

You mean like where ah give you like a set number of virgins in exchange for your chastity on earth? A virgin's only a virgin once; in this life or the next. So ah think it would be absurd to offer any number. 

Nope. All youz gotta do is worship moi. Allow moi into thine hearts. And bask in the everlasting love.

Next question...

And make it a good one

[counterpoint]

Can you do some impressive tricks, that prove, that you are not just a normal person, but something supranatural?

[mad_max2024]

What is the book of Ah?

Surely you must have a book
All the really cool religions have one

[ahinton]

'thou shall have no other gods before ME.'  I AM.  *note, i do not want people to worship me, susan.

Not even that husband of yours?...

Best,

Alistair

[rimv2]

Can you do some impressive tricks, that prove, that you are not just a normal person, but something supranatural?

Yes, ah can. But ah don't need to prove anything. When you give yourself to meh, all will have been spoken for

What is the book of Ah?

Surely you must have a book
All the really cool religions have one

Ah don't have a book nor would Ah want or need one. Humans have a tendency to misconstrue ideas and put them in their own words. Why make a book, something wholly corruptible, when Ah can be pure and speak to youz directly.

Next question

[dnephi]

Why do momentum and position not commute?

[rimv2]

Why do momentum and position not commute?

Cause that'd make things too easy.

Next question

[mad_max2024]

What is the question to the ultimate answer of life, the universe and everything?

[rimv2]

What is the question to the ultimate answer of life, the universe and everything?

Ah'd speak the answer, only your current physical essence isn't enough to contain, simultaneously, such an infinitely complicated and wholly simplistic concept. Therefore, Ah shall answer this question for you at the time of your passing.

NEXT!

[mad_max2024]

Ah'd speak the answer, only your current physical essence isn't enough to contain, simultaneously, such an infinitely complicated and wholly simplistic concept. Therefore, Ah shall answer this question for you at the time of your passing.

NEXT!

I already know the answer... it's 42
I wanted to know the question

[rimv2]

I already know the answer... it's 42
I wanted to know the question

Yes but the question is also an answer. In order to seek the question to the answer of the question and obtain the true answer, one must first be able to ask the right question? With said answer being truly unquestionable (in your current state). Thus you know of an answer but you do not and cannot know the answer as the question to your answer shall only be known at your time of passing. This being, if you give yourself unto me, of course.

NEXT QUESTION

[rach n bach]

How can any religion founder still have that stupid bunny/owl thingy in his siggy?

[rimv2]

How can any religion founder still have that stupid bunny/owl thingy in his siggy?

You're going to hell

Next question

[jlh]

I lack faith in you.  Perhaps you can help me?  I think some kind of proof might help, as I am reluctant to accept the axiomization of AH.

[rimv2]

I lack faith in you.  Perhaps you can help me?  I think some kind of proof might help, as I am reluctant to accept the axiomization of AH.

This question has been previously answered. Please use the search function

NEXT QUESTION

[ada]

Elron Hubbard aka L. Ron Hubbard once famously said that the best way to get rich quick was to invent a religion.

Da proof is in da pudding.

[jlh]

This question has been previously answered. Please use the search function

NEXT QUESTION

You in fact have to prove something.  Otherwise you just look like a stupid forum actor. 

[arensky]

Ah gives mahself to AH.... 

AHA!!! 


'tis self love.....   

[rc]

"Love thyself as thy would thy neighbours wife"

[arensky]

"Love thyself as thy would thy neighbours wife"

My neighbors' wives are not a pretty picture, alas. 

[mad_max2024]

"Love thyself as thy would thy neighbours wife"

Wouldn't that mean that women would hate themselves?

[rimv2]

Wouldn't that mean that women would hate themselves?

He finally understands

[chidi]

Ah is starting a new religion. All who accept this new faith must worship, and accept the love of moi. Those who do not, must suffer a most horrid fate. Life without moi.

Pour your hearts out to moi.

Ask me a question and ah shall give you advicesis.

What is turkey to the square root of ham, minus negative fingers plus the thread "Starting a New Religion"?

YOU HAVE 6 hrs to answer or else....
















you die.




 

[rimv2]

What is turkey to the square root of ham, minus negative fingers plus the thread "Starting a New Religion"?

YOU HAVE 6 hrs to answer or else....
















you die.




 

What complete and utter disrespect. It shall go forgive.





This time

[gerry]

Sorry, I won't consider converting until you get a gaggle of believers to attribute bogus miracles  to you (a generous supply of drugs might help).

[pianowolfi]

Sorry but I belong already to the holy "spaghetti monster"

https://www.venganza.org/