Have you ever met anyone at a concert/recital?

[0range]

I've been going to a few recitals recently (just saw Hamelin at Jordans Hall in Boston... played Villa-Lobos' Rudepoema - wow! - among other things) and to be blunt, I keep seeing a ton of gorgeous girls I'd love to meet. Other than the intermission, there's not really any time to mingle, but I suppose that could work.

So, has anyone done it?

And to the girls, would you be put off if a guy tried hitting on you during the intermission?

[jlh]

I would recommend you find out who the pretty girls are with before you make your move... frequently concerts/recitals are a couple's date, and if you start hitting on some guy's date he won't be too happy about it.  Also, if the girl is with family or a group of friends it becomes more challenging as well.

Aside from that, try just talking with some of the girls.  Don't try to use any pickup lines either.  Pickup lines 1)don't work 2)give away the fact that you're trying to pick them up.  Also, don't be creepy about it.. if she's not showing interest, move on. 

What about the ticket lines before the concert (or at will call)? After the concert if they have a reception?

If you're REALLY desparate, try walking over to her seat while the pianist is playing and let her know how important it is for you to introduce yourself.  I'm sure that will go over well.

Have you considered that there are probably no more pretty girls at the recital than you normally see in any other given day?  Perhaps you're just noticing them because they put on their makeup and went to the salon right before the concert...? lol

[gerryjay]

I would recommend you find out who the pretty girls are with before you make your move... frequently concerts/recitals are a couple's date, and if you start hitting on some guy's date he won't be too happy about it.  Also, if the girl is with family or a group of friends it becomes more challenging as well.
Aside from that, try just talking with some of the girls.  Don't try to use any pickup lines either.  Pickup lines 1)don't work 2)give away the fact that you're trying to pick them up.  Also, don't be creepy about it.. if she's not showing interest, move on. 
What about the ticket lines before the concert (or at will call)? After the concert if they have a reception?
If you're REALLY desparate, try walking over to her seat while the pianist is playing and let her know how important it is for you to introduce yourself.  I'm sure that will go over well.
Have you considered that there are probably no more pretty girls at the recital than you normally see in any other given day?  Perhaps you're just noticing them because they put on their makeup and went to the salon right before the concert...? lol

i couldn´t agree more. only one thing to add: a recital it´s just like any other gathering. if you have an interesting eye contact or whatever that makes you feel interested in a girl, and you think that she could be interested as well, why not introducing yourself (as jlh wrote) and have a chat? the worst thing that can happen is a cold, frozen, glacial response and nobody ever got hurt by such a thing.

well, taken for granted that you did pay attention to the fact that the girl was actually alone... 

[gerryjay]

and sorry...answering to your actual question, i never did met someone new at a recital. but it´s very likely you find someone you know and...well, many happy endings of mine started on a recital, including my current one.

it´s a great place to socialize. if only the promoters realize that a joining rave would be cool...

[0range]

I would recommend you find out who the pretty girls are with before you make your move... frequently concerts/recitals are a couple's date, and if you start hitting on some guy's date he won't be too happy about it.

Well, if he's left her alone long enough to let someone like me come over and strike up a conversation, I'm doing the poor girl a favor.

Seriously though, I've actually seen quite a few girls/women there alone.

Aside from that, try just talking with some of the girls.  Don't try to use any pickup lines either.  Pickup lines 1)don't work 2)give away the fact that you're trying to pick them up.  Also, don't be creepy about it.. if she's not showing interest, move on.

Really? Pickup lines don't work, and I shouldn't be creepy?

Sorry for the sarcasm, but come on...

What about the ticket lines before the concert (or at will call)? After the concert if they have a reception?

None of the concerts I've been to have had receptions, but that sounds like it'd be a gold mine.

If you're REALLY desparate, try walking over to her seat while the pianist is playing and let her know how important it is for you to introduce yourself.  I'm sure that will go over well.

More wonderful advice...

Have you considered that there are probably no more pretty girls at the recital than you normally see in any other given day?  Perhaps you're just noticing them because they put on their makeup and went to the salon right before the concert...? lol

Of course there are pretty girls everywhere... I guess I should've been more specific. It'd be nice to meet someone who shared my interest and taste in music.

[thalberg]

Hi Orange,

I have never met anyone new at a recital-and I've been to a lot of them! 

However if you happen to see a pretty girl standing all alone at intermission and the opportunity arises, I suppose you could give it a try.  Here are the strategies I use to meet new people (which I do not do at concerts, but you could try):

1.  I say something to them as if we were friends already.  This works best if you're next to them for a while before you say it.  "Could you believe how perfect his pedaling was in the second movement of that Chopin?"

2.  Give a compliment. 

3.  Anticipate a need of theirs and help them with something.

4. Ask them to help you with something. 

5.  Share something delicious with them. 

Just a few thoughts.

But a formal atmosphere like a concert is a tough one!  If you succeed please come back and say so--we will be much in awe.

[jlh]

Sorry for the sarcasm, but come on...

More wonderful advice...

haha sorry I should've explained further that for me and everyone else I know, formal recitals have never worked for meeting NEW people, so please insert a healthy helping of sarcasm into a few of my sentences.    

And as Thalberg said, please let us know if you succeed in meeting someone special at such a gathering, and let us know your secret to success!

Josh

[zheer]

  The supermarket is apparently a good place to meet someone if your looking,  i dont know about you, but finding someone attractive does not mean You will like that person,thats a good thing, because we would be in serious trouble otherwise.
From my experience if you go looking, the chances are you wont find anyone. Trust KISMT
,dont go looking for that someone special, infact make the best of being single for now and at the same time make the effort when the time comes.

[amanfang]

I think classical concerts are great for meeting new people if you're looking for someone in their 70's.

[gerryjay]

I think classical concerts are great for meeting new people if you're looking for someone in their 70's.

well, that´s absolutely true at least for a theater here where i live.

it could be useful, since we´re talking about very wealthy seventish ladies...

[thalbergmad]

  The supermarket is apparently a good place to meet someone if your looking

Supermarkets are usually full of gormless women who spend 30 minutes trying to decide what brand of coffee to buy. Even if you asked one out, it would probably be 2 years before you got a response.

Somebody told me that Salsa classes were a good place to meet girls, but my experience did not confirm this. The fat cow i was partnered with had less co-ordination than a penguin and a face like a blistered piss pot.

I think bus stops are possibly the best.

Thal

[franzliszt2]

This week I met Kissin, Uchida and Stephen Hough.

[gerryjay]

The fat cow i was partnered with had less co-ordination than a penguin and a face like a blistered piss pot.

hey thal!

am i wrong or had you actually dig deep into the animal world? fat cows, disgusting pigs...it looks like an amazing curriculum...

I think bus stops are possibly the best.

that´s a cool idea, and a great way to kill some time while you´re waiting.

[richard black]

And to the girls, would you be put off if a guy tried hitting on you during the intermission?

Why should they be? If they're single they may for all you know be wondering if you would be put off by them hitting on you. Get your courage together and do it. The worst that come out of it is that you'll waste the price of a couple of drinks on someone who turns out to be boring or only interested in men much better endowed (financially! What on earth did you think I meant?) than you.

[ahinton]

Actually I'm please to say that I've met Richard Black at several recitals, but I did expect in advance to do so - especially those at which he was either performing or turning pages. I admit that this fact is probably less than relevant to the general thrust of this thread, but I didn't see any obvious reason not to offer a temporary diversion in responding to its question by taking it entirely literally...

Best,

Alistair

[sharon_f]

A little OT, but I have a humorous concert-going story.

A couple years back I was attending a concert at the Kimmel Center in Philadelphia. Before the concert started I got into a conversation with the woman seated next to me who noticed in the program book that Lang Lang was appearing later in the season.

Woman: "I looooove Lang Lang!!!! He is soooooo fabulous. Have you ever heard him play? He's a genius. I hope he plays the Tchaikovsky Violin Concerto."

Me: "Lang Lang is a pianist."

Woman: "Oh."

True story.

[dnephi]

I'd pay him money to stay away from Tchaikovsky's piano concerto, though.

[thalbergmad]

I'd pay him money to stay away from the piano.

Thal

[0range]

I really don't know where to start wading through the hilarity in this topic... maybe when I'm done laughing.

[Mozartian]

And to the girls, would you be put off if a guy tried hitting on you during the intermission?

I go to concerts to hear music, not to be accosted by desperate guys who aren't musician enough to keep their minds off their..  I mean, on the music.

[0range]

I go to concerts to hear music, not to be accosted by desperate guys who aren't musician enough to keep their minds off their..  I mean, on the music.

Who said anything about desperate? Or being a guy, for that matter? 

[Mozartian]

Who said anything about desperate? Or being a guy, for that matter? 

As I quoted you, you clearly said: "And to the girls, would you be put off if a guy tried hitting on you during the intermission?"

(upon reflection, this needs no commentary)

[maul]

Don't worry Mozartian, you'll never have that problem.

[gerryjay]

define irony...

I go to concerts to hear music, not to be accosted by desperate guys who aren't musician enough to keep their minds off their.. I mean, on the music.

isn´t rather strange that somebody who declares her admiration for herr mozart (a well-known libertine) in her nickname, could separate music and ...er... other issues... this way?

btw, this is not an attack or anything, just an insight about how things change and how another just doesn´t matter. or whatever...

no further comments! 

[gerryjay]

I'd pay him money to stay away from Tchaikovsky's piano concerto, though.

I'd pay him money to stay away from the piano.

sounds one, two...anyone else wants to bid?

 

[jpowell]

...

[gerryjay]

Pianists watch out!!

I have recently got into all sorts of trouble from extremely keen, charming and pretty girls who have come to my concerts, especially in Russia for some reason. It's quite flattering of course, but ultimately this sort of thing can lead to much trouble and upset.

So be careful! Very careful.

hey powell!

do you have groupies? 

[thalberg]

A little OT, but I have a humorous concert-going story.

A couple years back I was attending a concert at the Kimmel Center in Philadelphia. Before the concert started I got into a conversation with the woman seated next to me who noticed in the program book that Lang Lang was appearing later in the season.

Woman: "I looooove Lang Lang!!!! He is soooooo fabulous. Have you ever heard him play? He's a genius. I hope he plays the Tchaikovsky Violin Concerto."

Me: "Lang Lang is a pianist."

Woman: "Oh."

True story.

Priceless !!!   I love this story.  It made me laugh. 

It reminds me of the same time someone said their favorite cellist was "yo mamma"

[netzow]

That reminds me of a story I heard someone actually announced Yo Yo Ma at a concert as yo momma.

[0range]

That reminds me of a story I heard someone actually announced Yo Yo Ma at a concert as yo momma.

Hahahaha! I love YoMama.

Seriously though... no need to attack Mozartian. To be honest, that's kinda the vibe I got from a few chicks I was checking out. So thanks for the input.

isn´t rather strange that somebody who declares her admiration for herr mozart (a well-known libertine) in her nickname, could separate music and ...er... other issues... this way?

I was thinking this too...

[thalbergmad]

I go to concerts to hear music, not to be accosted by desperate guys who aren't musician enough to keep their minds off their..  I mean, on the music.

In your case, they would have to be bloody desperate.

Thal

[sharon_f]

I have recently got into all sorts of trouble from extremely keen, charming and pretty girls who have come to my concerts, especially in Russia for some reason.

Perhaps in search of a green card?

[thalbergmad]

My cousin went on holiday to Moscow and came back with a beautiful girl on his arm who he intended to marry.

A few months later she went missing, and very strangely he lost his wallet around the same time.

Illegal immigrants cannot even be bothered to try and jump a lorry at Calais anymore. They want to be flown in.

Thal

[jpowell]

...

[ahinton]

vot eto russkiye zhenshchiny

my recent disaster is not even that simple - she has money, frequent visits abroad etc. She's just impossible, but very beautiful ...

Well, at least her name isn't Salome (heads, platters, Jonathan the Baptist...??...). For most pianists, Gulistan is also "impossible, but very beautiful"; when played by a pianist that can play it (and I believe that you've known one of these all your life), however, it is surely about as far from a "disaster" as it is possible to get...

Good luck with your recital tomorrow! I wish that I could be there!

Best,

Alistair

[Mozartian]

Seriously though... no need to attack Mozartian. To be honest, that's kinda the vibe I got from a few chicks I was checking out. So thanks for the input.

Yeah, it's always weird to have some random guy hitting on you. And the random guy may be a nice guy, but the fact that he's random is off-putting. Also, when random guys hit on girls they don't know- it comes across as super superfical, cause clearly it's based solely on looks. If the girl has a brain and is worth having, she's not going to be impressed. So I'd say you're best with looking within a group of people that you actually know.

[thalberg]

Yeah, it's always weird to have some random guy hitting on you. And the random guy may be a nice guy, but the fact that he's random is off-putting. Also, when random guys hit on girls they don't know- it comes across as super superfical, cause clearly it's based solely on looks. If the girl has a brain and is worth having, she's not going to be impressed. So I'd say you're best with looking within a group of people that you actually know.

Yeah I'm a male and I even feel that way.  A couple of random women in grad school hit on me and I was thinking "you don't even know me, leave me alone."

Intermission gives you like 10 whole minutes to get familiar.  A losing battle I say.

[0range]

You know, to be honest, the whole deal for me is that I really hate that feeling you get when you wonder what would have happened if you'd stepped outside of your box and done something unusual.

I could really care less how it goes, just having had the nerve to do whatever it was that I wanted to but was too scared/embarrassed/nervous to do is a good feeling.

I also tend to look for people who are comfortable in themselves and can appreciate and join in, or at least roll with, my antics.

Also, when random guys hit on girls they don't know- it comes across as super superfical, cause clearly it's based solely on looks. If the girl has a brain and is worth having, she's not going to be impressed. So I'd say you're best with looking within a group of people that you actually know.

I would love the person I date to be a good friend. Unfortunately, I only have two female friends that aren't off to school, and one is already an ex.

If I were in school it'd be a whole different ballgame, but working 40 hours a week in construction isn't really conducive to meeting interesting people, let alone attractive girls.

A question... is it weird for you to have a guy that you don't know start a conversation with you out of the blue? (Reverse sex for Thalberg, I suppose)

Intermission gives you like 10 whole minutes to get familiar.  A losing battle I say.

I don't know... I've hit it off with people in less time than that. I know that in a setting like a concert I'm almost instantly interested in anyone in my age bracket (early 20's) simply because we're in the (usually) extreme minority.

I guess I just need to hit the concert hall and come back with results. (Anyone want to be my page-turner/wingman? =)). (It'll be great science!)

[Mozartian]

A question... is it weird for you to have a guy that you don't know start a conversation with you out of the blue?

Hmm... that happens to me a fair bit... unfortunately I have to say it depends on the guy. Sometimes it's blatantly creepy- you know the the type of conversation that is at "you should give me your number and  we can hang out sometime" in less than 2 minutes. Othertimes it's okay... I've met some cool ppl at school that way. But the difference is we end up seeing eachother again and again, cause we go to the same school- whereas if you met someone at a concert, unless you deliberately set up a future meeting within that 10 minute intermission time, chances are you wouldn't see her again. So the friendship doesn't progress as naturally.

Sometimes concerts have pre-concert galas and such, maybe that's a good way to meet people?

[Bob]

I have a sadly amusing story on this topic.


I was sitting at a concert and this girl comes up to me.  I was reading the program and daydreaming.

Girl:  "I just wanted to come over and say hi." 

Bob, startled: "Um ok... hi."

Awkward pause.

Longer awkward pause.

Girl leaves.


Not that it really matters, but another interesting detail.  A semester latter she was accepted into Eastman and went off there.

Maybe a few years a little more meaning behind that moment dawned on me.  (Bob thinks... "What a sec... Maybe I shouldn't have taken it so literally..."  Since then I've decided to ask, "And how are you?" to double the length on those types of conversations.

[maul]

rofl

[Essyne]

IDK - I guess it just depends . . .

I like musicians, soooooo - a concert/recital doesn't really seem like a bad place to meet them - besides, how long does it take to ask someone out for coffee afterward?

I know that in a setting like a concert I'm almost instantly interested in anyone in my age bracket (early 20's) simply because we're in the (usually) extreme minority.

Agreed