What if...

[Bob]

What if this happened again? 

[pianochick93]

Like it did with the 'If you look here you have to post' thread?

[Bob]

What....?  (without the if)

[goldentone]

What if, because this is the third thread of its kind, this
"What if" thread disappeared by the hands of the Piano Street Hall
of Justice?

[Bob]

What if this is a doppelganger of the forum?  Again?

[tanman]

what if........
I stole bob's old signature?

[Bob]

What if... hey!

What if we all became spokespeople for wrist-awareness?

[Bob]

What if I didn't give it up?  (Bob doesn't just give it up you know.)

What if I thought tanman's post were mine again because of the signature line?

[pianowolfi]

What if the legendary original what if thread disappeared clandestinely? What if I missed it?

[javacisnotrecognized]

What if you could find it in the forums rubbish bin?

What if pianostreet doesn't HAVE a rubbish bin  ??

[go12_3]

Pianos have 100 keys.....

[iroveashe]

Pianos have 100 keys.....

There are pianos with 97 keys. 

[pianowolfi]

What if...

[Bob]

That's such a distinctive sound.  Reminds me of a Gamalan.

What if... this thread quietly rose back to the surface?

[goldentone]

What if the legendary original what if thread disappeared clandestinely? What if I missed it?

What if you, Sir Wolfi, spoke prophetically?

And so it did!  My yearnful thread, wherefore hast thou gone?

"The planet Krypton, as it was"

*Hands out complementary tissues*

[loonbohol]

I do not understand Atonal.

[Bob]

Atonal means "no tonal center."

What if... women were taught the Friday the 13th he-he-he, ha ha ha echo during la maz?

What if... all meat products at the store were actually made up of human flesh?  There are a lot of people in world.  You never see any dead bodies or at least not as many dead bodies as people.  And the supermarket always has lots of meat.  You can put two and two together on that right?  Exactly.  There was pepperoni on my pizza last night and I wondered what was actually in the pepperoni.  Then I put it all together.  And I remembered thinking "Well it's a cow.  Sorry cow.  I'm hungry and you taste good."  That took on a different tone.  There are a lot of people.  I haven't seen many dead bodies laying around.  The supermarket is always stocked full of meat.  People are always talking about recycling.  It just makes sense now.  And they're always promoting no smoking.  Why?  Because it will taste bad, that's why.  It all makes sense now.  (Bob thinks he would still eat hamburgers anyway.  They taste good.)

[Bob]

What if a superhero had a "moment of human urgency?"  They tend to wear a one-piece body suit.  What if they're just about to save the day and then they feel their stomach gurgle, a signal that the countdown has begun? 

Refer to this post for relevant accompaniment music to this dire superhero situation.
https://www.pianostreet.com/smf/index.php?topic=31162.msg387027#msg387027

[m19834]

What if a superhero had a "moment of human urgency?"  They tend to wear a one-piece body suit.  What if they're just about to save the day and then they feel their stomach gurgle, a signal that the countdown has begun? 

Refer to this post for relevant accompaniment music to this dire superhero situation.
https://www.pianostreet.com/smf/index.php?topic=31162.msg387027#msg387027

haha !  Bob !!  I'm *supposed* to be napping because I barely slept last night, and whilst I was laying here "napping" I read your post here, followed the link to listen to the theme music, got entranced by Wolfi's link and the piano and its sound (I WANT one !!!), forgot WHY I was listening to that music, remembered why I was listening to that music and had a good, honest giggle !!  Haha ... I laugh just thinking about it !  You crack me up. I have to say, you post some funny stuff, but your concept here is something I would nominate as one of your most hilarious ... hee hee.

BYE !!!  zzzzzzzz   

[Bob]

I was thinking after I posted that -- Aren't a lot of superheroes wearing their one-piece costume under their normal clothes?  How are they going to the bathroom?  Spiderman, fine, he made that himself.  Batman?  He's got armour now.  Newspaper headline: Bruce Wayne shoots himself while using the toilet.  But Superman... He's got it rough.  His suit doesn't break.  Superman would have to take the entire suit off just to use the bathroom, and that's just No. 1.  (I imagine Superman must be pretty pale if he's always got a long-sleeved shirt on).  They must have it figured out.  I imagine at some point someone must have said, "Hey!  Is that a bum _____-ing over there?" and someone else would say, "No, that's just (insert superhero character).  They had an emergency."  I've only been thinking of male superheroes too.  That situation would come up as soon as they put on the suit.  If you are ever aware of a superhero flying over, you might not want to look up.  But if you do, don't open your mouth.


What if... you took two keyboards and tuned the second one up or down 50 cents?  what if you stacked the keyboards on top of each other?  Voila!  Quarter tone instrument.

(Bob is still picturing Batman gearing up with all his amour, then pausing for a second, then quickly removing all his armour again and hurrying away.)

[redragon]

What if I used to love Batman, but now I can't look at him without laughing?

[chopianist123]

Where did pianistimo go ?!?

What if she came back tomorrow?

[ihatepop]

What if no one remembers ihatepop? 

Nothing would happen, I'm sure.

[pianowolfi]

What if I remember ihatepop?

[littletune]

What if... I dont know how to embed a video?  im sure its really easy and i would figure it out if i just tried it but if i wanna try it i have to post it and i dont wanna post something stupid ( even though im posting something stupid ALL the time  ), so i just havent tried it yet .... 
Well but thats not what i wanted to say. I wanted to say:

What if it hurts to be tuned in 16th tone??

That quarter tone piano is kinda cool (i dont think i would mind having that one ) . But this one scares me! (and it scares my doggie too!) I dont know maybe its just this piece or this video but it sounds like crying and screaming and suffering or something I dont really feel very nice when i listen to this one. Maybe u can get used to it after some time      but what if it hurts?! 

[ihatepop]

What if I remember ihatepop?

Woah damn you do? 

There's a surprise.

[yukira]

   oh i Think it really hurts!

[Bob]

What if yukira produced an entire paragraph?

[mrba1979]

What if I was popular though I rarely post.

[Bob]

What if mrba was actually a kind of thumb piano?

[mrba1979]

What if mrba was actually a kind of thumb piano?

What if I invited you in to check out my thumb pad?

[Bob]

What if it was an iThumbpad?

What if.....  Yes, there is one...

(Bob is easily amused.)

Techno hippies...

[Bob]

What if there actually was a small percussion standing by out in the wilderness, waiting to start a beat going when an animal starts to attack.  They must be out there.  Every time you see an animal attack on TV there's always a drum accompaniment to it, most likely with an accented syncopation on beats 2 and 4.

[Bob]

Yuck.  I didn't think of this.  I just heard about it.

What if you ate human tissue that was grown in a lab, completely grown from scratch and never a part of an actual human, i.e. completely synthetic but exactly like real human tissue?  Would you be a cannibal?

[redragon]

What if it REALLY IS that we're not the insane ones? What if it is just the the other people that are? What if me asking that question is insane? What if that ruined my whole theory? What if my theory was insane? What if i wasn't insane a minute ago, but because i thought to hard on that, i'm insane NOW....?

[Bob]

What if we ask the voice what they think?  They usually have some good ideas.

[concerto_love]

What if... he's back?
 

[Bob]

What if... who's back?

[biscuitroxy12]

What if....I was the president of the UNited States?

People would wonder why they ever voted for Obama...or McCain (even though I"m a McCain Supporter.

[cherub_rocker1979]

What if... who's back?

I'm guessing, tds?

[Bob]

https://www.vat19.com/dvds/authentic-working-wood-trebuchet.cfm

What if... I failed to realize the difference between ' and " and my plans for "world domination beginning with this town" were significantly set back, despite a all-out attempt with this equipment anyway because I paid for it.

[Bob]

What if they plugged the Gulf oil leak with...

two giant scoops of vanilla icecream (which would stay frozen at those temperatures)

an enormous volume of whipped cream

and a giant cherry?


That stuff looks like chocolate syrup.

[Bob]

What if the Gulf oil spill was a switch located lower on the oil pipes that are sticking up?  What if someone forgot they could just flip it to the "off" position and stop the oil from coming out?

(Bob thinks that person would probably feel pretty stupid about now.)

[Bob]

What if this guy is a relative of the guy from the pickle slicer joke?

https://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20100523/ap_on_fe_st/us_odd_sausage_machine_mishap;_ylt=AtwkK_uaXu6jqP079fNsZ4DtiBIF;_ylu=X3oDMTMyMW1zYmp0BGFzc2V0A2FwLzIwMTAwNTIzL3VzX29kZF9zYXVzYWdlX21hY2hpbmVfbWlzaGFwBHBvcwMxBHNlYwN5bl9hcnRpY2xlX3N1bW1hcnlfbGlzdARzbGsDcG9saWNlbWFuc3Vj


What if it *is* the pickle slicer guy himself?

[Bob]

What if the origin of the universe and of everything was based on a random mistake and random error is part of everything and the reason everything exists?

[pianowolfi]

What if he

was right and we are playing and living double as fast as people back then?

[furtwaengler]

What if he

was right and we are playing and living double as fast as people back then?

What if's aside, he's not the only one to present this view...there's an entire philosophy based on it, and indeed some awful recordings of Beethoven's 7th and 9th symphonies played at half speed (I think a Mahler 5 as well...not half speed...but about 85 minutes! Ugh..). There's a DVD devoted to it somewhere. What can I say, except I disagree...people are generally not thinking music first.

What's interesting is a few years ago I saw Yakov Kasman play a recital with two pieces: Schumann's 1st Sonata and Rachmaninov's 1st Sonata. I arrived very early and caught him warming up in another room, bits and fragments of the Schumann interspersed with a Chopin op. 10 no. 1 I could set my watch to - literally. He was playing it at 1/16 = 60!!! It's a warm up, you see. I injured my arm jumping into a wall when playing racket ball and the week of had two senior recitals and juries. While I was in a good bit of pain warming up for the recitals, I remembered Yakov Kasman, and played op. 10 no. 1 with utmost focus, feeling everything...at 1/16 = 60 on the metronome, and found it very therapeutic indeed.   

[liordavid]

what if pianostreet had a piano competition