can't achieve what's 'perfect'

[ethure]

I feel I always can't achieve the perfect level I want in practice  

however I do, there's always something that feels lacking or unfullfilled. like, you want an apple on a tree above your head, you try so hard to jump, and jump and jump, but there always seem to be a fingertip-distance to get it. it seems so near, yet so far from your reach.

I guess I need to just practise a little more, and a little more, but I cant be patient. Each time when I've practised for a while(half or one or more hours) but still can't achieve what I want, I'd feel really disappointed with myself and feel that I'm just unable to do anything as well as I expect.

a few times, there were indeed some sudden 'breakthroughs' that so cheered me up that I got the believe strengthened that it's just a matter of practice and patience. but mostly, it's this disappointment and even frustration that affected the pratice.

is this some status that everyone can meet in their practice? or is it just that I'm really expecting too much on myself?  

[cjp_piano]

I feel your pain. Do you try small attainable goals? Just work on one small section or one idea at a time. Define what exactly you are trying to do and aim for that, but it should be a small section or an idea like dynamics.

[thinkgreenlovepiano]

I feel I always can't achieve the perfect level I want in practice  

however I do, there's always something that feels lacking or unfullfilled. like, you want an apple on a tree above your head, you try so hard to jump, and jump and jump, but there always seem to be a fingertip-distance to get it. it seems so near, yet so far from your reach.

I guess I need to just practise a little more, and a little more, but I cant be patient. Each time when I've practised for a while(half or one or more hours) but still can't achieve what I want, I'd feel really disappointed with myself and feel that I'm just unable to do anything as well as I expect.

a few times, there were indeed some sudden 'breakthroughs' that so cheered me up that I got the believe strengthened that it's just a matter of practice and patience. but mostly, it's this disappointment and even frustration that affected the pratice.

is this some status that everyone can meet in their practice? or is it just that I'm really expecting too much on myself?  

As a perfectionist, I know how you feel. I have these feelings all the time, and it can make practising really difficult.
What I do is set small goals. After lessons every week, I write down what I have to learn by next week. I also keep a little journal of all my practise sessions, to track my progress. Maybe you can't reach the apple right by jumping, maybe it's even dangerous or impossible, but if you give yourself the time to build a ladder... it'll be much easier.

You just have to convince yourself that practising does make a difference. Why else do people practise? Maybe the results are too small to see now, but they well come. Just take it easy and enjoy your practice. When I'm frustrated, I remind myself of why I want to do well piano in the first place- I love piano. And I love piano not because it makes me perfect, but because I enjoy it.

I know it's easier said than done. I still have trouble with this. But reading your post I felt like I could really relate. And this is the advice I would and have give myself.
 

[opium_64]

I feel I always can't achieve the perfect level I want in practice  

however I do, there's always something that feels lacking or unfullfilled. like, you want an apple on a tree above your head, you try so hard to jump, and jump and jump, but there always seem to be a fingertip-distance to get it. it seems so near, yet so far from your reach.

I guess I need to just practise a little more, and a little more, but I cant be patient. Each time when I've practised for a while(half or one or more hours) but still can't achieve what I want, I'd feel really disappointed with myself and feel that I'm just unable to do anything as well as I expect.

I don't understand why you are complaining on the internet about not being fulfilled, when the time spent typing your sentence could have been spent working at the imperfections. I just don't understand this at all. I come from an era before the internet, when we talked to each other in person. That's all gone now, sadly.

[mike_lang]

I don't understand why you are complaining on the internet about not being fulfilled, when the time spent typing your sentence could have been spent working at the imperfections. I just don't understand this at all. I come from an era before the internet, when we talked to each other in person. That's all gone now, sadly.

Do you believe that every minute of the day should be spent practicing?  Is there something wrong with seeking community from a website full of (in some cases, hopefully) sympathetic pianists?

Mike

[mike_lang]

however I do, there's always something that feels lacking or unfullfilled. like, you want an apple on a tree above your head, you try so hard to jump, and jump and jump, but there always seem to be a fingertip-distance to get it. it seems so near, yet so far from your reach.

First of all, you'll find that the more specific you become in your goals, the more goals you will reach.

Second, remember that progress comes with time, so this is a case where we cannot "live as though this day is our last;" we need to practice with the faith that more progress will be made tomorrow, and that perfection needn't come all at once.

My third point grows out of that last clause: "perfection needn't come all at once."  In fact, it needn't come at all!  It's been said that good is the enemy of better, and I think we can substitute perfect for good.  We want to continually grow as people as musicians, and the moment that that something is perfect, it is complete.  If you choose a life as a musician, you choose a life of growth, and not perfection.

Just remember to reflect every now and then on what has improved, as well as what needs improvement.  And most of all, remember that things that need improvement are opportunities for growth!

Best,
Mike

[opium_64]

Do you believe that every minute of the day should be spent practicing?  Is there something wrong with seeking community from a website full of (in some cases, hopefully) sympathetic pianists?

Mike

Yes. You are weak minded and going on a computer for a 'shoulder to cry on' is stupid and immature.

[cjp_piano]

Yes. You are weak minded and going on a computer for a 'shoulder to cry on' is stupid and immature.

Wow. So I guess we don't need other human beings to relate to our experiences? Have fun being lonely!

[pianoplayjl]

To achieve what's perfect you must practice hard to the best of your ability and strive to be the best as we can. 

[opium_64]

Wow. So I guess we don't need other human beings to relate to our experiences? Have fun being lonely!

It all seems a bit to personal and emotional for it to be real to me.

[opium_64]

I feel I always can't achieve the perfect level I want in practice  

however I do, there's always something that feels lacking or unfullfilled. like, you want an apple on a tree above your head, you try so hard to jump, and jump and jump, but there always seem to be a fingertip-distance to get it. it seems so near, yet so far from your reach.

I guess I need to just practise a little more, and a little more, but I cant be patient. Each time when I've practised for a while(half or one or more hours) but still can't achieve what I want, I'd feel really disappointed with myself and feel that I'm just unable to do anything as well as I expect.

a few times, there were indeed some sudden 'breakthroughs' that so cheered me up that I got the believe strengthened that it's just a matter of practice and patience. but mostly, it's this disappointment and even frustration that affected the pratice.

is this some status that everyone can meet in their practice? or is it just that I'm really expecting too much on myself?  

Did you type all this for a laugh?

[rmbarbosa]

I dont understand what Opium says... And I dont agree. Perfection, in piano, isnt reached only with time practice but also listening the opinions of the others. In my personal case, I would not play as I play if I didnt read, for example, Bernhard posts (and the posts of many other fellows). If Opium is right, then we must play 24 H/day... And many times is precisely when we are resting that a new idea comes...
By the way, it`s perfectly possible that one doesnt like what he plays, even if he plays very well. We are not the best listeners of ourselves. For example, in my case, I tend to be very "intelectual" in my approach of a piece of music. I study each piece thoroughly before I try to play it. As a result, when I can play that piece, it`s a product of my mind more than of my heart - that`s my main difficulty... But some days ago, I drank 3 glasses of wine with dinner (usually I only drunk one) and then I went to the piano and played one Nocturne of Chopin, better than ever... and then I understood that those 3 glasses of wine gave me a "perfection" made of freedom and sensibility and "heart"...
And I understood also that in music "beauty" and "life" are more important than "perfection".  Rui

[_achilles_]

lot's of good input here in my opinion (except opium being a.. well, we'll left that unsaid.. but in case you haven't noticed people on the internet are actually real people to  )

@rmbarbosa: I know exactly what you mean (or at least close).. I don't practice much after having a few glasses of wine but just playing a few songs I already know really well is an amazing experience

@michael_langois: Your first point is great. I had never thought of that before.



Climb the tree to get to the apples!

[ethure]

Thank you everyone. I appreciate all the kind supports and advices and especially the understanding a lot. It's been some hard time for me recently and it's really nice to be knowing that there're people who share this similar experience and know how to go out of it. Thank you very very much.