How do you deal with arrogant students?

[rachmaninoff_forever]

Today I came across a person who happened to play the piano at my school and she was soooooooooooooooo arrogant!  She was like, "oh yeah I only practice like half an hour a day and I can play almost anything".  So I was practicing and she kicked me out of the practice room!  Then I heard her play and she wasn't that great.  But I didn't say anything because I didn't want to be mean and she was rather attractive so I wouldn't wanna get on her bad side if you know what I mean  .

But anyways, how do you deal with an arrogant student?  Do you like say that they suck?  Or do you show off how good you are by playing something that they can't play?  Or do you give them a lecture about how being arrogant isn't a good thing.  

[ajspiano]

.."here, learn these 4 transcendenal etudes by monday - don't come back if you fail"

..or perhaps something that is actually achievable but that you know will push the student hard.

[rachmaninoff_forever]

.."here, learn these 4 transcendenal etudes by monday - don't come back if you fail"

..or perhaps something that is actually achievable but that you know will push the student hard.

I bet that's possible too.  My teacher knows a guy who can sightread Rachmaninoff's 3rd at full speed.

[ajspiano]

many things are possible - your arrogant person doesnt seem like she'd be capable of that though -

in any case, the challenge must reflect what the student is capable of..  if you have a super human genius you could say memorise chopins complete works.

[bachbrahmsschubert]

By ignoring them and only worrying about yourself.

[werq34ac]

Haha, that's kinda funny.

Anyway, as the teacher, ask them to show you what they've got. Then after the student has (hopefully)
failed to impress you, you rip apart their playing. Tell them exactly what they're doing wrong including their attitude. I've had SEVERAL humiliating lessons before and needless to say, it's quite a humbling experience to be ripped apart like that. Not that I was being arrogant, but I have been ripped apart several times in lesson.

[cjp_piano]

It depends on the rest of the person's personality and what will work for them. Possibilities are:

-ripping them apart
-not being impressed when they think they just showed you something amazing
-have them participate in a contest, competition, or evaluation of some kind
-assign them a duet partner who is better than them
-make them sight-read with you (assuming you're better, haha)

[keypeg]

I think that you have to know what is motivating the behaviour.  If the person is insecure, or if the person has been told that only perfection will do and if they are not perfect they will fail (also insecurity), then ripping into them is the last thing you want to do.  What's behind it?

Something that I find personally humbling is finding out just how much there is to know which I don't know.  The best way to get there is a teacher who actually does know things, and who does not dummy down the content so that you can actually become aware of it. Of course the flip side is that the truly arrogant student will never listen enough to realize it - which brings us back to problem 1.

[alessandro]

Of course the flip side is that the truly arrogant student will never listen enough to realize it - which brings us back to problem 1.

That's right.   Or is it not ?
Since I also (I'm not a teacher) feel concerned with a teenager girl that is often arrogant, and really a-rro-gant, sometimes beyond words, she can really be arrogant force 10 that I really feel like bursting with rage, I find it very, very difficult to deal with her arrogance, I'm really interested in this topic and the matter.   Arrogance... gosh, it's sometimes beyond words.   On the one hand, I do think that a reasonable deal of arrogance is not necessarily wrong or bad, if it's an occasional overflow of self-confidence.  (I, myself, am more the type of person that says "I'm sorry" when someone steps on my toes, and I don't think that is necessarily good).   I would like to focus on the arrogance in language (and not talk about the arrogance in composure, in attitude).   The things that I try (and frankly, I don't have the feeling that they have any effect... yet, but I'm not hopeless) is communicating a sense of key-notions like humbleness, respect, and also awe or admiration.   Another thing that I notice, and I'm talking of this particular girl, is that there is also some volume in her voice.   So, I say, thousands of times, please speak softly, modulate your voice, 'sing' your point a little.   My next 'move', since there is still too much arrogance for me, would be to let her whisper things.
In a feeling of despair I looked for studies about the phenomenon and I read in the “psychological branche” something that really opened my eyes and gave me in the same time a feeling of recognition ; there is something terrible with ‘arrogant’ people, they often don’t even realize that they ARE arrogant ! And as if that was not enough, even if you try to communicate something about their arrogance, they will not realize what you are talking about and will not understand it ! There is some kind of barrier.   And that is absolutely true.   It’s as if they are listening to you when you are talking about your annoyance or disapproval, but when you look at them carefully, you see that there could be something of a façade, and even in the nodding or the expression of comprehension, I’m left with a feeling of not have gotten to the core of the arrogant person.   Isn’t that a pity !
Another thing that arises, and I wouldn’t like that this topic drifts away in this ‘other’ thing but I can’t help to mention it, is in how far is a youngster, or a kid “educatable”, changeable.   Is the human more like a rock that is polished by nature-spontaneous forces, or is it more like a “hammer and anvil” situation (I have a deeply rooted disgust of any form of violence).   And, to tell you all, I do often feel really hopeless in this ‘arrogance’ situation towards this girl and then I think “let it be, man, let it be, she’s just like that, don’t try to change it too hard, just try to live with it."   But that is so difficult if not impossible!
Is there a psychologue in the house ?!
I’m also always interested in any good books or articles about ‘arrogance’ .
Kind greetings to you all.  
  

[rachmaninoff_forever]

How about you tell her to play something then you tell her to move over and play Scarbo or something lol.

[rachmaninoff_forever]

at's right.   Or is it not ?
Since I also (I'm not a teacher) feel concerned with a teenager girl that is often arrogant, and really a-rro-gant, sometimes beyond words, she can really be arrogant force 10 that I really feel like bursting with rage, I find it very, very difficult to deal with her arrogance, I'm really interested in this topic and the matter.   Arrogance... gosh, it's sometimes beyond words.   On the one hand, I do think that a reasonable deal of arrogance is not necessarily wrong or bad, if it's an occasional overflow of self-confidence.  (I, myself, am more the type of person that says "I'm sorry" when someone steps on my toes, and I don't think that is necessarily good).   I would like to focus on the arrogance in language (and not talk about the arrogance in composure, in attitude).   The things that I try (and frankly, I don't have the feeling that they have any effect... yet, but I'm not hopeless) is communicating a sense of key-notions like humbleness, respect, and also awe or admiration.   Another thing that I notice, and I'm talking of this particular girl, is that there is also some volume in her voice.   So, I say, thousands of times, please speak softly, modulate your voice, 'sing' your point a little.   My next 'move', since there is still too much arrogance for me, would be to let her whisper things.
In a feeling of despair I looked for studies about the phenomenon and I read in the “psychological branche” something that really opened my eyes and gave me in the same time a feeling of recognition ; there is something terrible with ‘arrogant’ people, they often don’t even realize that they ARE arrogant ! And as if that was not enough, even if you try to communicate something about their arrogance, they will not realize what you are talking about and will not understand it ! There is some kind of barrier.   And that is absolutely true.   It’s as if they are listening to you when you are talking about your annoyance or disapproval, but when you look at them carefully, you see that there could be something of a façade, and even in the nodding or the expression of comprehension, I’m left with a feeling of not have gotten to the core of the arrogant person.   Isn’t that a pity !
Another thing that arises, and I wouldn’t like that this topic drifts away in this ‘other’ thing but I can’t help to mention it, is in how far is a youngster, or a kid “educatable”, changeable.   Is the human more like a rock that is polished by nature-spontaneous forces, or is it more like a “hammer and anvil” situation (I have a deeply rooted disgust of any form of violence).   And, to tell you all, I do often feel really hopeless in this ‘arrogance’ situation towards this girl and then I think “let it be, man, let it be, she’s just like that, don’t try to change it too hard, just try to live with it."   But that is so difficult if not impossible!
Is there a psychologue in the house ?!
I’m also always interested in any good books or articles about ‘arrogance’ .
Kind greetings to you all.  
  

Sorry for the super long wrote, but for some reason I couldn't quote a small section of it.  But ANYWAYS, when you asked the nature vs nurture question, I think it's more in genes.

[jesc]

Today I came across a person who happened to play the piano at my school and she was soooooooooooooooo arrogant!  She was like, "oh yeah I only practice like half an hour a day and I can play almost anything".  So I was practicing and she kicked me out of the practice room!  Then I heard her play and she wasn't that great.  But I didn't say anything because I didn't want to be mean and she was rather attractive so I wouldn't wanna get on her bad side if you know what I mean  .

But anyways, how do you deal with an arrogant student?  Do you like say that they suck?  Or do you show off how good you are by playing something that they can't play?  Or do you give them a lecture about how being arrogant isn't a good thing.  

Okay there's something absolutely wrong with that scene. If she practices for only half an hour a day why is she desperate enough to practice by kicking you out of the room?

If someone blatantly tells me that they only need half an hour of practice a day and asks me to leave the practice room I'd say straight to her face, "There's enough half an hour left in this day. You don't need the practice room. I do... so scram."

You want to make her life miserable? Play by her rules. Make sure that she only gets half an hour of practice whenever she's in the university. When asked why then tell her, "You only need half an hour practice while everyone else needs more so gtfo."

Okay, you might not be as cruel as me. So... I suggest... indifference. Indifference to the point that you won't care if she needs the practice room. This may work since people can be all they want and it won't matter to you. (ok, I just read some of the replies above and bachbrahmsschubert already suggested this )

Now, if you're slightly attracted to this girl, this might not work and I rest my case.

BTW: From a teacher's perspective (i.e. the student is not a pest but you want to help her)
You must realize that the combination of "arrogance" and "incompetence" is the most pitiful state a person can be in. Arrogance coupled with competence will somehow give a good chance of a future. Incompetence coupled with humility will also give a student a good future since the person is capable of rectifying the incompetence because he/she is humble enough to realize it. Arrogance coupled with incompetence is a death sentence. You want to help her? There are two things: Raise her skill to match her arrogance or lower her arrogance to match her skill. TBH I have no problem with arrogant people as long as they can back up what they're arrogant about and... as long as they're out of my way most of the time lol.

[werq34ac]

Now, if you're slightly attracted to this girl, this might not work and I rest my case.

Lol it's hard to say no to a girl who's attractive. Though if it's clear that they're trying too hard to be pretty, then it detracts a lot.

Wait does she have the room reserved? Then she does have a right to kick you out, but not in that fashion.

New approach. If there's just a point where you can't stand it anymore, just say that you were there first. And if she DOES have a right to the room, just say you could have asked nicely. It's good to be firm but you should maintain your dignity. You don't want to stoop to her level. And if she hates you for the rest of your life for it, she's most certainly not worth it. Maybe worth getting drunk and... but not having a serious relationship with.