melting down in a lesson

[starlady]

Before my last lesson I practised hard, did everything right, and was feeling pretty good about things.  In fact,  I was thinking that I had the piece pretty much nailed. But the first time I played in the lesson, I mistook a few notes at the beginning and basically fell apart.  The  teacher did not get particularly upset--sighed and said to calm down and start again--but I felt miserable. Also embarassed for being so miserable. Which made the misery worse.  You get the idea.   

Now I'm pretty high-strung, but I doubt I'm the most neurotic person on this forum, and I don't think  I'm the only person this has happened to. So how do 'good' piano students handle it?  Anyone got a mantra or a magic trick to get you back on track when you've started to slide off the road?

All positive comments welcomed--s.

[roseamelia]

Re-practice the song till your next lesson, you could tell your teacher if you could do it for another week and have it nailed then. These things I have done and it really helps!

I had a song once it was a lullaby and the night before my lesson I didn't sleep well so went to the lesson I was sooo tired I played the song like baby at the piano I screwed up so bad. I felt really bad but I was just to tired to do it but I didn't know that till I started and when the next lesson came I went through it like going through a wheat field. So you should just keep practicing just one more week and see what happens on your next lesson. if you do this then give us an update on how it went.

-Rose

[zoecalgary]

You are not alone! This happens to many of us! I have had several incidents during the past year of lessons where this has happened. I worked so hard all wel and at lesson chaos where nothing went right. So what did I do? Well I have to remember that this is a hobby. I'm supposed to be having fun. I am a student. There to learn. My teacher doesn't expect me to be perfect. I am human. Humans make mistakes.

I have to just laugh it off when the mistakes happen. Or maybe start again. Laughing breaks my internal chatter of what a goof I am. Releases my tension and I can move on to hopefully a better part of my lesson.

I also usually mess up the most after an intense week of practice. I think it is because at these times I am learning so much it gets jumbled up under the pressure of my teacher watching me! As the earlier poster said just keep practicing it and try again next week. It will be more settled in your mind and hands and you will do better.  Also try to at for yourself vs for your teacher.  I find that helps me. I think well here is where I am at. Whatever that is. I do my best and see what she has to say after I'm done. Remember if you could nail things so easily you wouldn't need a teacher!

Laugh it off. It will improve!

One more thing. Try going up to your piano throughout the day and playing your piece cold. I mean without warmup, etc. See how you do. It may uncover weak spots you were not previously aware of. Also try playing at a slower speed. And a faster speed. This is harder than it sounds I found and really has me thinking about what I'm playing and forces me to focus.

[octavius_trillson]

I think we all get nervous when playing for others to some extent. Try this, set up a camera in front of your piano and video yourself whenever you practice, it may make you  more used to the idea of someone watching you play. Even though the camera isn't a person, it will likely cause the same anxiety you experience when someone is physically there listening to you play.

About being miserable, don't take yourself so seriously, life is what you make it, make it fun. Don't blow things out of proportion, you made a few mistakes so what? He's a piano teacher, if nobody made mistakes he'd be out of a job, that's what he's there for, to help correct them.

If you are younger than 16 read no further.






Here's a mantra:

I'm cool as a cod
I'm funny as a f*ck
Play piano like god
And I'm always in luck

Repeat ad infinitum

[iansinclair]

Stuff happens.  If you think it's bad in front of your teacher -- who sounds like a sympathetic sort of soul -- try it in front of a congregation (I was a church organist).

[roseamelia]

Wow a church organist that would be so cool!!

[j_menz]

If you're going to completely stuff up a piece, in front of your teacher is the best possible place to do it.  Don't sweat it, it's what teachers are there for.

[brogers70]

I think this is common. I've never played any piece for my teacher as well as I've played it for myself while practicing; sometimes close, but often not close at all. It used to bother me, but then I noticed that what we worked on in response to my "melt downs" was usually more helpful than his comments after I'd done better. The other thing I'd say is that there seems little correlation between how intensely I've practiced a given piece and how well it comes off during the next lesson. Sometimes I think all the intense practice needs a week or two to sink into the brain before it shows up in how you play the piece at a lesson. And as others have said as long as this is a hobby and not a profession, why worry?

[m1469]

Anyone got a mantra or a magic trick to get you back on track when you've started to slide off the road?

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.  
Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.

Psalm 23, 4-5  

 

[simeonalojipan]

I really think it has to do with mental (subconscious) thinking. I used to be a student where I would get nervous in every lesson and have it all fall apart. But once my self-confidence and general belief rose up, my practicing and lessons had less mistakes, etc. How comfortable you are with your teacher also counts. My current teacher is one of my closest people in my life and she's a mentor to me, so although I wouldn't like messing up a lesson, I'm not afraid to and I rarely do; I have no self-confidence issues whatsoever in my lessons (although I might have some in actual performance, haha). So, I really think your self-esteem plays a large role in having success in music, or any career field in general.

 Have you tried meditation? Thinking about how you will play before you play? Showing the piece to your teacher SLOWLY and not up to tempo?

[newkidintown]

Take a deep breath, and remember that they are a teacher because they have experience in music. Which means that at some point they most likely made the same mistakes, were in the same situation during their lessons, etc.

Then turn to the teacher, smile, and ask if you can start over.

Heck, I've seen people do this in auditions and still make it (including yours truly). Once, during my "classical days", I even did this in the middle of a performance in a mall when I lost my place.

It happens, and people understand. Just remember that.

[keypeg]

You almost have to not care that your teacher is there or what he thinks.  The other thing is a complete change of focus.  Imagine that you are taking carpentry and you have brought in the chair you were working on.  The master carpenter and you look at that chair, and he says that the legs can be shaved a bit thinner, and he thinks this week he showed give you some pointers on good sanding-down or varnishing technique.  You're both looking at the chair and the things you need to learn.  Nobody is looking at you - you are not a performer out to woo an audience or to impress your teacher - you are an apprentice learning a craft.  A couple of us came up with this some years back and it made a huge difference.

[svetmira]

You've received great advice so far!

My two cents:

Leave your pride at home! Yeah, I know, easier said than done. But really, being a student is a lesson in humility... forces you to admit that you are human and therefore make mistakes. They are a natural part of learning (anything). Being a perfectionist myself, I concede it's not an easy lesson.

Still not comforted?

Ok, just try and think how many times your teacher has seen a student "melt down" in a lesson... even better: ask your teacher if that ever happened to him/her as a student. I'm pretty sure he/she will be able to tell you a couple of stories that will immediately make you feel better about yourself. There's comfort in numbers.

Good luck!