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Topic: Duna Autumn  (Read 1204 times)

Offline danthecomposer

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Duna Autumn
on: May 25, 2014, 08:02:07 PM
Hello,

Feedback would be most appreciated for my latest upload.

https://soundcloud.com/danthecomposer/duna-autumn

Feel free to join me on FB via my SC profile.

Many thanks,
Dan.
www.danthecomposer.com
Ich weiss dass mein Erlöser lebt - Liszt Ferenc

Offline faulty_damper

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Re: Duna Autumn
Reply #1 on: May 25, 2014, 09:33:08 PM
A comment about the sound, it sounds like the una corda is depressed throughout the piece so the treble is often muffled and is not clear.  I don't think this is the intent so an acoustic piano would sound better.

The introduction includes arpeggios that sounds rushed and disturbs the tranquil mood.  If it were arpeggiated a little slower, it would express that tranquil, almost reflecting mood better.  Or it shouldn't be arpeggiated at all, and performed as chords instead.

It sounds like the piece can be more condensed and concise because the main theme sounds like it extends for too long.  On a related note, the arpeggio flourishes feel out of character a lot because it adds too much during tranquil moods.  It's too much that it loses meaning.  I would imagine that if the arpeggios were constant, like painting the background, it would feel more in place and add more movement, especially if placed near the end of the piece.

Also, that last arpeggio doesn't sound like a convincing conclusion.  It feels like there should be an attacca onto another movement.

Offline danthecomposer

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Re: Duna Autumn
Reply #2 on: May 25, 2014, 09:46:39 PM
Thank you muchly,

You said what I was hoping you would say: not enough clarity.  I am using an expensive sample set through my USB Yamaha keyboard and as you can imagine, the pedal is either ON or OFF, so I can't control sustain as I wish.  Frustrating.

This was a take, rather than an album version, but as you probably have not read about my composition style as of yet, I write the chords with the melody in my mind.  If people wish to play it, on any instrument, they are to learn the chords from the charts (I will provide in due course) and understand the complex chords, but learn the melody by ear.  Thus, each time I play it, I make little changes and I expect others to do the same.  For this reason, it is not 'scored'.

The end is supposed to sound unfinished!  I do it to make the listener either happily want more, or frustratingly feel I did not end the piece correctly.  I enjoy provoking both responses since I have received both (more of the former than the latter to which you, quite satisfactorily, subscribe.

I shall make a second version with a little less arpeggio movement to not ruin the tranquil moments, as you quite accurately call them, and perhaps build to a greater arpeggio accompaniment towards the end rather than the beginning.

However, I hope in general you will enjoy my piano world.

Many thanks,
Dan

www.danthecomposer.com
Ich weiss dass mein Erlöser lebt - Liszt Ferenc
 

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