How to approach a girl

[thalbergmad]

Agreed Bob.

If a girl is foaming at the mouth, it does not always mean that she has been brushing her teeth.

Thal

[Bob]

spaghetti

[m1469]

Here's another one :

"Hey, baby.  I like to walk the line between joking around that women are animals that I have control over and actually taking that seriously.  I like to pretend like women are useless except for what I want from them, except that I am not really pretending.  Don't you think that's funny and irresistable ?  And then, if you get upset, I will act all innocent and as though I have no idea what I am doing."


*************************


"How to approach a boy"

Don't bother, whatever he wants you to perform for him, he has already done to/for himself (a million times over) and fantasized about you doing it for him, while doing it.

[imbetter]

LMAO

[m1469]

Here's a good one, but it may need a little prepping (or maybe not) :


First, go to your local costume shop and inquire about their "butthole" outfits.  Find something that you feel really reflects your inner self, but still allows you to move freely and breathe and talk out of the middle of it.  Once you have your butthole costume all figured out and on (it may end up looking a lot like the way you dress everyday), it's time to approach your girl.

"Hey baby, what you see is what you get.  Now come on over here and lets make out, I kiss my mamma with this mouth."


Of course, I am only joking around.

[thalbergmad]

I am shocked.

[thalbergmad]

Sometimes "how much darling" works.

Sometimes not.

Thal

[opus10no2]

Shocked and disgusted.

[m1469]

Oh, I am just so embarrassed 

[Bob]

spaghetti

[m1469]

Oh, yeah.  I am totally there with ya' man.  And, it's a really funny joke as well, it had me just laughing my pants off.  I'm just jokin' around, too.  Isn't this fun that we can joke around like this with each other ?

*goes about the day, mopping up*

Sings a little mopping song, Adam Sandler style :

mop, mop, mop, all day long 
Mop, mop, mop while I sing this song. 
I'm gonna mop this floor, I'm gonna make it shine 
I'm gonna take off the spray paint with turpentine

[Bob]

Spaghetti

(listens to song)

[opus10no2]

How about this (apparently it will work for lots of guys) :

"Hey baby, come see my erection protection comments on this "professional" piano site called PS.  Yeah, don't you think it's hot that I talk about and say the words 'penis' and 'boners' on a public piano forum ?  I do.   It makes me feel all manly cool  ."

I sense something personal.

Thanks for the advice.

[thalbergmad]

I sense something personal.

You have obviously had some kind of effect on her.

Thal

[Bob]

(Bob is cautious and has much spaghetti.)

[m1469]

You have all had some kind of effect on me .  That's what's great about this forum, we can all share so nicely and have so much fun together .


*plays in sandbox and shares toys*

[opus10no2]

I only hope to have a positive effect on you , m1469.

[rc]

*goes about the day, mopping up*

Sings a little mopping song, Adam Sandler style :

mop, mop, mop, all day long 
Mop, mop, mop while I sing this song. 
I'm gonna mop this floor, I'm gonna make it shine 
I'm gonna take off the spray paint with turpentine

Thanks for cleaning the place, I don't think it's ever been done.

I'll just be over here thinking about my wiener

[Bob]

Butters?

[opus10no2]

  He really grew on me, aww.

[rc]

(Bob is cautious and has much spaghetti.)

Try sprinkling some brown sugar on a plate of spaghetti - DELICIOUS!

edit:  :{D

[amelialw]

NO WAY!

If you're 11, make friends with ALL the girls...  in a couple years good things will happen.

I'll also agree about being careful with booze, that's how bad things happen!  Speaking of booze, I remember talking to an old guy whose strategy was to be a drunk so that when he has drinks with a girl she gets drunk much faster than he does.  Quite the creeper.

The very act of approaching and talking with a girl implies interest.  Nothing special needed, I've said some pretty dumb things and it didn't seem to matter.  Many girls WILL play games, one girl used to piss me off every day until I snapped on her, turns out she liked me (what ).  Don't accept the BS but don't take it too seriously either, you'd be surprised how often you can turn a bad situation good with a playful attitude.

You misunderstood what, what I meant is that why does he even want a gf when he's 11. Be friends with the girls, nothing wrong with it. If a girl always pisses you off there's a chance she likes you...Girls are just like that, in most cases. If they like you they act mean or will be annoying etc, that's just our nature

[m1469]

Thanks for cleaning the place, I don't think it's ever been done.

I'll just be over here thinking about my wiener

You are most welcome, RC 

If a girl always pisses you off there's a chance she likes you...Girls are just like that, in most cases. If they like you they act mean or will be annoying etc, that's just our nature

Speak for yourself  . 

I just live my life, if people get annoyed at me for that, that's their problem.

[opus10no2]

But m1469, you're not a girl, you're a woman 

[m1469]

I forgot for a second  .

*peeks at "the girls" to confirm* 

[opus10no2]

Women are supposed to be more mature, they're supposed to know themselves and know what they want, and therefore they can be more direct and focus on achieving that, as opposed to searching for what exactly they want to achieve.
At least that's the idea.

[m1469]

Women are supposed to be more mature, they're supposed to know themselves and know what they want, and therefore they can be more direct and focus on achieving that, as opposed to searching for what exactly they want to achieve.
At least that's the idea.

Yeah, you're right.  I feel so stupid now ... Why do I ask so many questions ?  I may never grow up 

I forgot how it worked.  We are born, we go through adolescence, we discover who we are through sex, then we know who we are for the rest of our life  -- no more learnin' for me thanks, I did all that by the time I were 12. hee haaa

Anyway, I could always check in with you or some other guy to make sure I am enough of a woman to exist in this world and call myself a woman 

*feels so tiny, insignificant and barefoot*

[opus10no2]

Yeah, you're right.  I feel so stupid now ... Why do I ask so many questions ?  I may never grow up 

I forgot how it worked.  We are born, we go through adolescence, we discover who we are through sex, then we know who we are for the rest of our life  -- no more learnin' for me thanks, I did all that by the time I were 12. hee haaa

Anyway, I could always check in with you or some other guy to make sure I am enough of a woman to exist in this world and call myself a woman 

Did it sound like I was talking about you?

I was just making the observation that much of the confusion about what girls want is caused by the common fact that they don't know what they want themselves, or do they?

[m1469]

Did it sound like I was talking about you?

I was just making the observation that much of the confusion about what girls want is caused by the common fact that they don't know what they want themselves, or do they?

Wow, man ... *inhales and holds it in* ... that's deep *exhales and blows smoke rings*

You're like ... so ... right on, man.  You must have it all figured out...






















uh .....






































man

[opus10no2]

Thank you for your respect..

[m1469]

You're most welcome  .  Anyway, I am just returning the favor 

[opus10no2]

You seem to get sarcastic when people touch a nerve, you don't want to make it that obvious in future.

[m1469]

Oh, thanks for your kind and gracious advice.  I shall cherish it forever.  Now, tell me, how did that register on the rictor scale ?

[opus10no2]

I'd rather you took me more seriously. I'm attempting sincerity, and it's hard, real hard.

[m1469]

Oh, okay.  You would like me to take you seriously and be sincere with you ?  You've got it.

1.  Don't touch my nerves if you don't like what happens when you do.

2.  I just don't feel sorry for you, nor for many people at the moment.

3.  Why should I have compassion for you ?

4.  Why should I listen to a word you say to me ?

5.  This, from somebody who constantly says just what's on his mind no matter how it makes another person feel.

6.  There's always going to be a force working against me.  What am I supposed to do, just lay down and let it run me over ?

7.  Don't treat me like a moron.

8.  This is getting 'old'

[opus10no2]

Oh, okay.  You would like me to take you seriously and be sincere with you ?  You've got it.

1.  Don't touch my nerves if you don't like what happens when you do.
2.  I just don't feel sorry for you, nor for many people at the moment.
3.  Why should I have compassion for you ?
4.  Why should I listen to a word you say to me ?
5.  This, from somebody who constantly says just what's on his mind no matter how it makes another person feel.
6.  There's always going to be a force working against me.  What am I supposed to do, just lay down and let it run me over ?
7.  Don't treat me like a moron.
8.  This is getting 'old'

Don't give me the 'credit' of having the intuition to know how you will feel and react to everything.

I'm sorry if I have ever unintentionally made you feel bad, or made you feel like I was treating you like a moron.
If I have, I genuinely didn't know about it and have to learn.

[m1469]

.

[opus10no2]

Can frustration be exciting?

[m1469]

.

[opus10no2]

  If someone ever knows a person completely, would it no longer be interesting?

[m1469]

Only if s/he were a boring and uninteresting person

[opus10no2]

Well, yes, but do we only 'pursue' and seek out that which we don't know already?

Is it a good thing when you know a person enough to find them predictable?

[thalbergmad]

Now, tell me, how did that register on the rictor scale ?

Probably didn't, but on the Richter scale it might have.

Thal

[cziffra]

you guys are dumb as f***

[opus10no2]

you guys are dumb as f***

Give us a tech masterclass, ziff.

[rc]

You misunderstood what, what I meant is that why does he even want a gf when he's 11. Be friends with the girls, nothing wrong with it. If a girl always pisses you off there's a chance she likes you...Girls are just like that, in most cases. If they like you they act mean or will be annoying etc, that's just our nature

I had to backtrack a bit there...  My memory isn't the best, but I don't think too much even CAN happen at that age.  But I see your point, nothing at that age should be taken very seriously.  You mentioned immaturity, but I think the actual problem is when somebody tries acting more mature than they are.

I remember when I would get into trouble at 13 and my Dad would tell me "ACT YOUR AGE!"...  I would think in my head "are you sure that's what you want?"

[amelialw]

well, that's not my nature to behave like that, alot of other girls do, at least that's what I can see

[opus10no2]

Vaginas and breasts are undoubtedly fabulous, but I'm interested in the idea which seems to prevail - that the female personality is an obstacle in the way of the goal of boobies and fajita.

To men, is the female personality an interesting thing, a worthwhile thing, a loveable thing?

Take away her physical femininity and what has she got that would make you want to spend time with her more than you'd want to spend time with/talking to male friends?

[jlh]

Vaginas and breasts are undoubtedly fabulous, but I'm interested in the idea which seems to prevail - that the female personality is an obstacle in the way of the goal of boobies and fajita.

To men, is the female personality an interesting thing, a worthwhile thing, a loveable thing?

Take away her physical femininity and what has she got that would make you want to spend time with her more than you'd want to spend time with/talking to male friends?

Are you gay? 

[opus10no2]

U wish