Stupid things non-musicians say to us

[nanabush]

My brother's friend said the same thing... I was playing in a competition, and he was legitimately interested to see what a 'piano competition' was all about.  It wasn't a big competition, and this specific class was an open concert group:  I played Rach Op 39 #6, a Bach/Busoni transcription, and a very obscure piece by Moszkowski (very strange combination... I know... but I was also only 17).

Anyways, he said something along the lines of:

"Yo Nick, if I just spent like a year, and learned three pieces, and competed, and just had them down solid, do you think I could win something like this?"

"..."  was my answer.

He played soccer at a high level (University/College, provincial kinda team).  I said something like "It'd be as if I tried getting 'really' good at soccer in a year and 'schooling' everyone on the other team"...

The girl who won that category played four Chopin Etudes and 'Triana' by Albeniz.  I would LOVE to see someone who has never played an instrument sit down on a Sunday, full of ambition, and open up 'Triana', thinking "I am going to learn this piece today".  BAHAHA.

I can't say it was stupid, it was just a bit more naive, because he was completely unaware of the amount of work it takes to learn advanced rep...

===

This lead me to another tangent.  I'm at a recording arts program now, and about half of us play instruments; the others have done lots of studio work in the past, but from the engineer perspective...as in, they are really good at identifying sounds, but have little or no concept of music theory (to be completely honest, music theory only gets you so far as an audio engineer, but it is still a VERY useful concept).  These people keep saying "So you play piano?  My old piano teacher could PLAY A SONG AT SIGHT!  SHE NEVER SAW IT BEFORE AND SHE JUST PLAYED IT!!!"...

"..." was my reply.  In person I'm pretty laid back/shy/passive, and don't brag about things, but I am going into this recording diploma thing with a degree in piano performance... I can sight read lol.  It's just funny that it seems exactly like 'magic' to people.  To me it's just like reading a book, to them it's as if I'm moving mountains.  It's hilarious, almost 'cute' in a sense... lol!

But ya, being away from the University system, you realize how naive about 90% of people are to classical music... I'm good at introducing people to this genre, and showing them the merit of appreciating it; but it's tough telling someone that I could spend a year working on a 3 page piece "because it's THAT hard"... they don't understand how it could take so long to learn something if you were spending every day on it.  Again, I like making crazy analogies.  I explained that Chopin 10/1 was like doing 3000 consecutive long jumps across tiny platforms above a ravine...if you only had one shot to do it (aka a Recital), then you'd probably spend a year practicing haha.

[cometear]

It has to be:

"Can you read music?"

I can't stand when the elderly ask me that. Then they say how beneficial it is blah blah blah. Obviously I can read the notes. I have twenty books on my piano! God that frustrates me.

Great topic!

[cabbynum]

It has to be:

"Can you read music?"

I can't stand when the elderly ask me that. Then they say how beneficial it is blah blah blah. Obviously I can read the notes. I have twenty books on my piano! God that frustrates me.

Great topic!

My grandparents ask me that everytime they come to town.

They also ask
"Do you know Chopin?"
They are my grandparents so I'm polite
"Yes, he sure is good isn't he." I reply
My grandmother is a bit of a cook her response is almost always one of these two "I love the slow movement from that one sonata, the funeral march" or "I can't stand that bastard"

[cometear]

My grandparents ask me that everytime they come to town.

They also ask
"Do you know Chopin?"
They are my grandparents so I'm polite
"Yes, he sure is good isn't he." I reply
My grandmother is a bit of a cook her response is almost always one of these two "I love the slow movement from that one sonata, the funeral march" or "I can't stand that bastard"

Ha ha. I don't let people know that they annoy me and I just am polite.

[Bob]

"You could play something to entertain us while we eat."

[pianoisthebest23]

"You could play something to entertain us while we eat."

These are some of the truest words ever spoken.



Something that doesn't necessarily annoy me, but more makes me laugh is when I am playing a piece and a non-musician comes over and says "Oh, is that Mozart?" simply because that's the one composer we all learned about in school.

[j_menz]

It has to be:

"Can you read music?"

I can't stand when the elderly ask me that. Then they say how beneficial it is blah blah blah. Obviously I can read the notes. I have twenty books on my piano! God that frustrates me.

Great topic!

But can you read music, or do you have to play it first?  The latter is expected, the first (just sit and hear the music off the score) is somewhat rarer.

[cometear]

But can you read music, or do you have to play it first?  The latter is expected, the first (just sit and hear the music off the score) is somewhat rarer.

I'm talking about when they ask if I can read the notes and decipher them. Not sight read.

[j_menz]

I'm talking about when they ask if I can read the notes and decipher them. Not sight read.

But is that reading them so as to say "that's an E" or "that's a Cm7 in second inversion:. Or do you just read them and hear whats written - like you read a book.

[kakeithewolf]

Sometimes, when I compose, I get the irritating comment "It sounds like real music.".

It's kind of obvious that it is music...

[cabbynum]

Sometimes, when I compose, I get the irritating comment "It sounds like real music.".

It's kind of obvious that it is music...

I've had that said to me before. It's just downright mean in my opinion.

When I compose I often get the comment "oh so you've changed it again? Big surprise. Can you ever keep it the same?"
I'm working on it! Do you think I would turn in a first draft English assignment?

[rubato22]

My Teacher absolutely nailed Fantasie Impromptu at a xmas party years ago only for someone to then ask if she could play "Roll out the Barrel".......................

[timothy42b]

My Teacher absolutely nailed Fantasie Impromptu at a xmas party years ago only for someone to then ask if she could play "Roll out the Barrel".......................

Seems to me it's just as dumb to play FI at a party as to play Roll Out at a high mass. 

[j_menz]

Seems to me it's just as dumb to play FI at a party as to play Roll Out at a high mass. 

You need to start going to a better class of party. 

[rubato22]

You need to start going to a better class of party. 

Took the words right out of my mouth!

[timothy42b]

You need to start going to a better class of party. 

Well played, sir!

[kakeithewolf]

I got plenty of new things yesterday.

I played my compositions somewhere the other day (which, as you all know, are terrible) and people asked me if I was a savant.

I also got "Sounds like it's from a Disney movie".

[rachmaninoff_forever]

Someone thought the Ondine was from kingdom hearts...

[kakeithewolf]

Someone thought the Ondine was from kingdom hearts...

You win.

[ignaceii]

This is the most stupid topic I'v ever read.
Seen the number of replies, the piano street world is really equally stupid.
And to end, his last quote on syncopation proofs the woman at the church is more clever than the stupid, not knowing what to say.
My God, I gave up this forum for years. But I gave it a try on Volodos in Vienna, and then I see this stupidity. 0 replies, and this stupidity gets all attention.

God, let it end.

[kakeithewolf]

This is the most stupid topic I'v ever read.
Seen the number of replies, the piano street world is really equally stupid.
And to end, his last quote on syncopation proofs the woman at the church is more clever than the stupid, not knowing what to say.
My God, I gave up this forum for years. But I gave it a try on Volodos in Vienna, and then I see this stupidity. 0 replies, and this stupidity gets all attention.

God, let it end.

If you're going to rant, spell "I've" right.

[Bob]

Yeah, it's pathetic.  This is the most unsuccessful 14-page (and going) thread I've ever seen.  How do we live with ourselves?

[chicoscalco]

Someone thought the Ondine was from kingdom hearts...

One time this guy in a forum called a piece "the ondine" as if there was only one! 

[kakeithewolf]

One time this guy in a forum called a piece "the ondine" as if there was only one! 

That must have been VERY embarassing for that person.

[ignaceii]

If you're going to rant, spell "I've" right.

do you write dutch fluently ?

[ignaceii]

If you're going to rant, spell "I've" right.

by the way it was a keyboard error, I know how it spells.

[kakeithewolf]

do you write dutch fluently ?

Nee, maar dat is niet van belang. Noch kann ich schreiben Deutsch. Of selfs Afrikaans.

[cuberdrift]

*playing Mozart's variations on "Twinkle twinkle little star"
Classmate: "Can you play classical music?"
Me: Of course...
...

Alright, I just realized I myself was stupid too at that point... 

I also recall several instances where I play some remarkably difficult compositions, then someone asks me to play Canon in D...

[rachmaninoff_forever]

One time this guy in a forum called a piece "the ondine" as if there was only one! 

Hey there's only like two!

[kakeithewolf]

*playing Mozart's variations on "Twinkle twinkle little star"
Classmate: "Can you play classical music?"
Me: Of course...
...

Alright, I just realized I myself was stupid too at that point... 

I also recall several instances where I play some remarkably difficult compositions, then someone asks me to play Canon in D...

That may be more or less due to the fact that Canon in D is extremely popular. It's not necessarily a unintentional backhanded slight against the more technically advanced compositions.

I mean, honestly, if you're at a normal party or gathering, people are going to likely request music that is familiar, calm, and of a more moderate pace. A notable exception would probably be Toccata and Fugue in D minor or Passacaglia and Fugue in C Minor, but those usually aren't requested for piano due to the matter of the pedalboard not being on a normal piano.

[j_menz]

A notable exception would probably be Toccata and Fugue in D minor or Passacaglia and Fugue in C Minor, but those usually aren't requested for piano due to the matter of the pedalboard not being on a normal piano.

Don't let that stop you; there are a number of jawdropping piano transcriptions of both.

[kakeithewolf]

Don't let that stop you; there are a number of jawdropping piano transcriptions of both.

Well, I was also thinking of pedal piano, but that works too.

[cuberdrift]

That may be more or less due to the fact that Canon in D is extremely popular. It's not necessarily a unintentional backhanded slight against the more technically advanced compositions.

I didn't take it as an "unintentional backhanded slight", but it just saddens me a bit that a normal person couldn't tell, or at the very least, feel the difference between a simple piece and a complex piece.

[kakeithewolf]

So, I've got a recent one...

I haven't got a lot of skill in playing piano. I only know how to play a basic variation of Dies Irae, and even with that, I make quite a few mistakes.

But when my brother sees me at a piano, he immediately just says something along the lines of "play some Bach or Beethoven". All I am thinking is "Care to narrow down the choices by a few hundred?".

[ignaceii]

Can anyone please erase this most stupid thread ever. What a waste of time and space.

[kakeithewolf]

Can anyone please erase this most stupid thread ever. What a waste of time and space.

1. "this most stupid thread ever" is not correct grammar.
2. You're completely alone in your opinion.

[cabbynum]

Can anyone please erase this most stupid thread ever. What a waste of time and space.

No one is forcing you to look at this thread?
Sure it doesn't have much musical value but it's fun, a nice place for people to get a few things off their mind, that's for sure.
It's a bit entertaining, but this is the same thing where I have issue with people being so bothered by cyber bullying, just log out , block them. Or in this case, just don't check it anymore.

I mean it's not the best thread ever, but it's for sure not the worst.

[rachmaninoff_forever]

Can anyone please erase this most stupid thread ever. What a waste of time and space.

Oh come on dude this is one favorite threads!

If Nils (I still haven't met him yet) deletes this thread, I'm going to renew my love for Valentina lisitsa and continue my endeavors to end the world!

And I know none of you guys want that...

[rachmaninoff_forever]

I got one for you guys.

Except this guy IS a musician. 

He's a violinist. 

He's depressed because he doesn't think he can make a career as a violinist.

Okay, you know...  That's normal.

But here's the reason why...

Because he can't play faster than Shlomo Mintz and he hasn't learned all of the Paganini caprices yet.  (He's 16 or 17).  He keeps comparing himself to Paganini NOOOO!!!

I can't find the exact quote, but he said something along the lines of... "*** musicality!  It's about playing fast and perfect.  It's the next step in human evolution" or something like that.


I'm still arguing with him.

...
...
...

*facepalm*

 

[Bob]

On that, being a music jock and playing like a MIDI recording would get someone pretty far I think.

[j_menz]

I can't find the exact quote, but he said something along the lines of... "*** musicality!  It's about playing fast and perfect.  It's the next step in human evolution" or something like that.

We're evolving a MIDI plug? 

[kakeithewolf]

We're evolving a MIDI plug? 

The way some people play, I wonder if that is so.

[littletune]

I just thought what our neighbour said was kinda funny. (Well it's not exactly funny that I had to completely stop playing my real piano but anyway).
When my mum said how it was possible that me practicing piano (about half to one hour every other day, or not even that much, always with the quiet (middle) pedal) bothered him soooo much but all the other noise that you can hear every day didn't bother him. He said that it was because other sounds were just random accidental sounds but I was playing the piano ON PURPOSE! 

Soo if I was playing the piano by accident it would have been ok... or... I don't really know if maybe he wanted to say that I was playing piano on purpose just to annoy him... 

[quantum]

Maybe the piano irritated your neighbor because the music was saying something meaningful.  The person may be reluctant to engage their senses in a manner that encourages thought and contemplation.  Possibly a fear of being overwhelmed with one's own ideas, or reactivating thoughts of past experiences through the music. 

[Bob]

A disconcerting one is when someone says something like this with conviction...
"That guys is a genius."
"That drummer is really, really good."

Someone had to show me a youtube clip of a drummer.  The guy's keeping a steady beat.  But... He's a genius and an awesome drummer.  A lot of kids at high schools all over could do the same thing.

Another scary aspect -- Someone else will believe that person when they say things like that. 

[littletune]

Maybe the piano irritated your neighbor because the music was saying something meaningful.  The person may be reluctant to engage their senses in a manner that encourages thought and contemplation.  Possibly a fear of being overwhelmed with one's own ideas, or reactivating thoughts of past experiences through the music. 

That's an interesting explanation! And I think you are probably right! Because the neighbour's wife (who doesn't live with him anymore cause she ran away) told my mum once that their oldest son really loved classical music and books and that he (her husband - the neighbour) didn't like that at all and didn't want his son to be interested in "those kinds of things" (whatever that's supposed to mean). So I think he probably does have some kind of a bigger problem and it's not just me playing the piano that bothers him.
(when I think about it this way I kinda start feeling sorry for him) 

[stravinskylover]

1) I play a really fast C Major arpeggio, and people said that I am a prodigy. I play a four voice Bach fugue, and people think that my technique is worse than the kid who butchers Fur Elise!

2) Someone told me that classical music has no depth...

3) A very uncoordinated dance team that messed up several times (obviously) beat a kid at a talent show competition who played the entire Liszt Rhapsody Espagnole flawlessly (and beautifully).

[inverted]

It's not funny in a "haha what a stupid question" way but I was going over CPE Bach's Solfeggio and Beethoven's 14th Sonata without the sheet music and my dad asked me "how do you remember so many notes?" and he didn't understand that it kind of just becomes muscle memory. I'm not actually thinking what the next note or chords are in my head but my hands just kind of lead the way and go where they need to be, because I've went through the same motions so much.

It's difficult trying to explain that to somebody who's never experienced it themselves.

[theholygideons]

This was back in highschool:
*studies the first page of the score to pathetique sonata*
vice-principal walks by.
'WHAT'S THAT?'

I remember having a slight giggle, because to them, it's probably an alien language. Imagine a musically illiterate person looking at Sorabji's scores...   

[jollisg]

This was back in highschool:
*studies the first page of the score to pathetique sonata*
vice-principal walks by.
'WHAT'S THAT?'

I remember having a slight giggle, because to them, it's probably an alien language. Imagine a musically illiterate person looking at Sorabji's scores...   

My math teacher walked by when I looked at the first two pages of Haydn HOB XVI:33. "How do you read that??". Well... I read