Last post wins!!!!!

[j_tour]

Look at the pretty picture.

[perfect_pitch]

Why would you post that? Instead of getting a heart attack from too high a cholesterol level, why not just stab yourself in the chest?

Much quicker than heart attacks and strokes.



This is the breakfast of champions... this is how I'm going to outlive you ALL!!!

[j_tour]

why not just stab yourself in the chest?

I'm very proud of my broad shoulders and strong pectoral muscles.  I am not proud of your cowardice in the face of a pommie breakfast.

Here, go perform a little dance to improve your health.



And FYI, this is an appropriate breakfast, priced to fit any age, budget, and size.

[perfect_pitch]

I prefer something a little more relevant...

Plus you can't walk into work after having a half a bottle of that. Yes, I remember having to have a liquid diet when I got my braces, but damn I never touched that stuff. Thought it might rust the metal.

[j_tour]

Plus you can't walk into work after having a half a bottle of that.

Sure you can.  If you believe it, it's true.

[perfect_pitch]

If that's after 1 day, I dread to see what he's like after a week.

Hence, why I don't drink Whisky before work. Only on the weekends, and sometimes the night before Monday...

...and the night before Tuesday...



...and if I've had a student who for the 6th week in a row hasn't bloody well practiced her god-damn PIECES!!!

You know what... time for Whiskey.



Some fun facts about Whiskey:

https://www.buzzfeed.com/erinlarosa/pieces-of-excellent-news-for-whiskey-drinkers

[j_tour]

[perfect_pitch]

That HAS to be the legendary voice of Sam Elliott.

I have NEVER seen this show. You have me intrigued. It's like levels upon levels of what, but at the same time, bizarrely funny... I think.

[j_tour]

That HAS to be the legendary voice of Sam Elliott.

I have NEVER seen this show.

It is Sam Elliott. 

Robot Chicken is hilarious, pretty often.  Not every little "skit" is a winner, but most are.

[perfect_pitch]

Robot Chicken is hilarious, pretty often.  Not every little "skit" is a winner, but most are.

That's it - I gotta find these show on Netflix or something. That one was pretty bloody brilliant.

Any more gems you have from Robot Chicken?

[j_tour]

That's it - I gotta find these show on Netflix or something. That one was pretty bloody brilliant.

Any more gems you have from Robot Chicken?

Yeah, lots, but it's been a bit (it's still on the air, but I have a few seasons to catch up on), so you must be content to see them as I recall them piecemeal.

No idea if they're distributed via NetFlix or AMZN Prime or whichever.  I don't actually have my TV connected, so I'm out of the loop nowadays. Most "episodes" are likely easily found via leTube, I'd guess.

I'm now on the end of an only-McCloud TV series binge.

[perfect_pitch]

Damnit - I just check 5 minutes ago that I was still winning, and then you sneak out from under my nose.

Also, watching TV shows like 'McCloud' is not helping your 'young and cool' image.

This is what the kids are into these days... and damn, it is quite good.

[j_tour]

Also, watching TV shows like 'McCloud' is not helping your 'young and cool' image

You.  Eat me.  That "young and cool" enough for you, you little scrapper?

[perfect_pitch]

scrapper?

Not even my grandmother used that word.

[j_tour]

Not even my grandmother used that word.

Pity, that, you reckless bounder!

O tempora, o mores!

[perfect_pitch]

O tempora, o mores!

[lostinidlewonder]

There was a young man from Mauritius.

[perfect_pitch]

There was a young man from Mauritius.

...and??? I don't know that one.

[lostinidlewonder]

You can enter it in google search as if I wrote it here I might get melted into a puddle by the censor haha.

[perfect_pitch]

What in the bloody hell rhymes with mauritius that could be so bad???

Delicious?
Surreptitious?
Vicious?
Dishes?
Wishes?
Fishes?

I don't know if I want Google knowing my search history - it's more fun if you just tell me.   

[lostinidlewonder]

I don't know if I want Google knowing my search history - it's more fun if you just tell me.   

I find your lack of pronoia disturbing.

[perfect_pitch]

I find your lack of pronoia disturbing.

HEY... I found out a new word. I'm going to make it my word of the day.

[j_tour]

Repenoia.

Semper ubi sub ubi until you do repenoia.

[perfect_pitch]

Jesus... it took you almost 3 days to realise you hadn't replied to this thread...

You're slipping.

[lostinidlewonder]

Slipping jimmy, or jimmy slip.... I guess j_tour would prefer one of those more than the other.

[perfect_pitch]

[j_tour]

Slippin' Jimmy:  gonorrhea-free since 1995. 

[perfect_pitch]

Paris Hilton:



Gonorrhea free since... NO WAIT!!! Sorry, I'm getting confused between her and this broom. This broom...



...has been Gonorrhea free since 1995.

As for Paris? I presume that the antibiotics no longer work on her any more.

[j_tour]

As for Paris? I presume that the antibiotics no longer work on her any more.

Robots don't require antibiotics.  Just a soldering pencil and some fresh capacitors.

[perfect_pitch]

After how many people have apparently slept with her, I doubt she's a robot.

Although, apparently the Japanese are making major strides in that area.

[j_tour]

After how many people have apparently slept with her, I doubt she's a robot.

Admit it....that vacuum cleaner looks pretty good! 

So does that neighbor's pet chicken!

[perfect_pitch]

Admit it....that vacuum cleaner looks pretty good! 

So does that neighbor's pet chicken!

Not even gonna go there.

[j_tour]

[perfect_pitch]

And I thought my proctologists finger was MORE than enough.

[lostinidlewonder]

Too bad this hotline isn't around for you two no more, you will just have to deal with your loss.

[perfect_pitch]

You Americans sure are weird. We don't have crap like that - we just get shitfaced and talk to the barman about our problems, sleep it off in a ditch and wake up without our trousers, wallet and mobile.

Really puts things into perspective.

[lostinidlewonder]

You Americans sure are weird.

American?? lol. You Chinese all think the same way.

[perfect_pitch]

Did you even listen to the full advert - the very first line is 'what makes people all over AMERICA cry like this'

I wasn't assuming you were American - I meant the advert was weird... and I'm not Chinese, although I LOVE me some szechuan chicken.

[lostinidlewonder]

I'm sure j_tour likes the taste of Chinese chicks too lo0ol. I know you are a round eye, the ad most likely isn't about people who call up having some issues in life but something else much more..... weird.... lol

[perfect_pitch]

Well, there are people who get themselves off over trees, so I can only assume there are many more weirdos out there that I'm not aware of.

[j_tour]

I'm sure j_tour likes the taste of Chinese chicks too lo0ol.

Yo, your head of state just died, so shouldn't you poms still be grieving over that dried up old bint's legacy of imperial stain?

I know I am.  With a mediocre Scotch whisky and a face full of tears.

[perfect_pitch]

I'm originally Scottish born, so it didn't bother me. We're kind of glad - and hoping to get a second chance to become independent and join the EU again.

It was a slap in the face when the vote went like this:
Most people in Northern Ireland wanted to remain
Most people in Scotland wanted to remain
England told the rest 'screw you', we want to secede, so England got its way.

[j_tour]

Yeah, I know, pregnant cat! 

But still, you all people of the Commonwealth have to answer for this!

[perfect_pitch]

I see your cheesy picture of Bill Shatner... and I raise you...



One terrible picture of Dolph Lundgren...

...one of the worst action actors of all time.

BEAT THAT!!!

[lostinidlewonder]

[perfect_pitch]

Yeah - he may have owned that quote in Rocky IV, but my god - he went straight to DVD for the next decade or 2 and starred in so many awful movies.

He's the Scott Adkins of the 90's.

[j_tour]

Yeah - he may have owned that quote in Rocky IV, but my god - he went straight to DVD for the next decade or 2 and starred in so many awful movies.

He's quadruple the man you'll ever be!

A veritable golden god!  One of the greatest Americans of recent memory!

He's also my second cousin, so watch your mouth, son!

[perfect_pitch]

A veritable golden god!  One of the greatest Americans of recent memory!

Shows how much you know him - he's SWEDISH!!!

[j_tour]

Shows how much you know him - he's SWEDISH!!!

Exactly.  A native-born Australian.  And one of the greatest.

[perfect_pitch]

What the sh*t... what happened to the beautiful facepalm I put in my last post???

God damnit...



Finally...