Last post wins!!!!!

[j_tour]

Here, go play with this for a while.

[perfect_pitch]

Here, go play with this for a while.

That looks more like a torture device than anything else...

[j_tour]

That looks more like a torture device than anything else...

Yes.  Guitarists have some problems.  They are not well.

[perfect_pitch]

Yes.  Guitarists have some problems.  They are not well.

Well, what should you do if you meet one? Is there anything we can do to help them?

[j_tour]

Is there anything we can do to help them?

Force them to read.  It's not all that difficult, at least to read single-note melodies or more abstract lines.

Then they are in a good position to learn, play, and understand music theory.

Nah, that's too square an answer.  Roll 'em in flour and look for the wet spots.  It will help somebody, I guess.

[perfect_pitch]

Nah, that's too square an answer.  Roll 'em in flour and look for the wet spots.  It will help somebody, I guess.

There are no words... just, no words... simply put.

Anyway, let's get this back to being classy. Some beautiful Haiku...

Haiku's are easy...
Some are hard to finish off...
Refrigerator.

And people wonder why I almost failed English in high school. I didn't fail, but I clawed my way to a C+.

[j_tour]

Anyway, let's get this back to being classy. Some beautiful Haiku...

Yeah, let's really ponce this place up.

[perfect_pitch]

Well, I guess we all know who was the class clown in high school.   

[j_tour]

Well, I guess we all know who was the class clown in high school.   

No u.

[lostinidlewonder]

Yeah, let's really ponce this place up.

Yes, well the pen is lol, and this one you can flip over for a surprise on back.

[perfect_pitch]

No u

You have to be kidding me - I did my work and never got in trouble. I was a great student to teach.

[j_tour]

I did my work and never got in trouble.

Then what are you doing in this photograph?

[perfect_pitch]

That's not me...

THIS is me.



Guess I had a bit of a rebellious time after high school. Being a goodie-goodie for so long just makes you want to break the rules and be a rebel.

[j_tour]

Being a goodie-goodie for so long just makes you want to break the rules and be a rebel.

Yep. 

It's always a good time to play guitar!  You get this:



And this:

[perfect_pitch]

I would love to see your Google history...

Sorry, I mean I would be HORRIFIED to see your Google history.

[j_tour]

Sorry, I mean I would be HORRIFIED to see your Google history.

[perfect_pitch]

Nah... I was thinking more like this:

[j_tour]

[perfect_pitch]

And that's how he became... GOAT MAN!!!

Half man, half goat - all PERVERT!!!   

[j_tour]

[perfect_pitch]

I really didn't need to see that... why on EARTH would anyone ever wear such a thing???

The mind BOGGLES!!!

[j_tour]

The mind BOGGLES!!!

No it doesn't.  Drink it in, mind.  Drink it all in.

[perfect_pitch]

Batman is overrated...

[j_tour]

Yes.  Batman's a freak and a tool.

There are better cartoons out there.

[perfect_pitch]

There are better cartoons out there.

You're right... there are.

[j_tour]

You're right... there are.

What are you talking about?  That's perfectly good music!  Excellent use of mid-low range of the modern acoustic piano.

It would sound better at 8vb, of course, but what doesn't?

[perfect_pitch]

Why on earth would anyone give a bear a gun? You start giving them guns, it won't be long before they take over the world.

YOU WANT THIS TO HAPPEN:



DO YOU?!?

[j_tour]

DO YOU?!?

NO!  HELL TO THE NO!

[perfect_pitch]

Good... and no, I wouldn't teach them how to ride a bike either. Before you know it they'll love transport so much they'll be on the buses with us, and wanting to drive... and I don't know about you, but I can imagine how tense getting into a car crash with a bear could be.

[j_tour]

Before you know it they'll love transport so much they'll be on the buses with us, and wanting to drive...

A ride!  Good idea!  Let's hit the fricking road! 

[perfect_pitch]

A ride!  Good idea!  Let's hit the fricking road!

Well... here in Australia, we don't have a lot of 'roads' per se.

[j_tour]

Well... here in Australia, we don't have a lot of 'roads' per se.

Well, I guess you'll just have to go bush, then!

[perfect_pitch]

As long as the bush doesn't get in the way of my ride... I don't care.

[j_tour]

Ladies and gentlemen, the bush sketch.

[perfect_pitch]

I never read Archie comics... but that's only because I was into you know... good comics - Batrman, Superman, Dilbert and Snoopy.

They at least taught you life lessons.

[j_tour]

They at least taught you life lessons.

Yeah, sure.  Lessons.

[perfect_pitch]

Well Looney tunes doesn't teach you anything... I tried smacking a dog once before with a lead pipe... and the results were not even close to what was pictured in the above gif.

After the court case, I wasn't allowed within 500 metres of any pet shop in Australia.

[j_tour]

[perfect_pitch]

Nope... I do not need to see the following panel. That's just *** weird.

Goats aren't that smart anyway...

[j_tour]

Nope... I do not need to see the following panel. That's just *** weird.

I think you need an attitude adjustment, sir.  I know just the man to give it to you.

[perfect_pitch]

Yeah... everyone should be scared of him. You piss him off, you're likely to be shot...



[Too soon???]

[j_tour]

Hush, now.

I have a new girlfriend who requires immediate attention at all times.

[perfect_pitch]

I have a new girlfriend who requires immediate attention at all times.

Does she take your breath away???

Sorry - bad wording, I meant do you have to inflate her again???

 

[j_tour]

Does she take your breath away???

Sorry - bad wording, I meant do you have to inflate her again???

 

She's made of liquid metal.

[perfect_pitch]

Nice try - there are no terminators otherwise this would be a sure sign that the world is doomed to an impending takeover from artificially intelligent robots that are bent on the destruction of man.

If you're telling me your girlfriend is really a terminator then...



*** KILL THE THING!!!

Don't think - just do it. Mankind will praise and thank you.

[j_tour]

No!

[perfect_pitch]

Okay, but if mankind is slaughtered by a race of alien robots hell bent on the destruction of mankind - I am HOLDING YOU RESPONSIBLE!!!

[j_tour]

Okay, but if mankind is slaughtered by a race of alien robots hell bent on the destruction of mankind - I am HOLDING YOU RESPONSIBLE!!!

[perfect_pitch]

I'm not even going to ask... I'm just going to look at you with disdain...

[j_tour]

Have some more beer, round boy.