Last post wins!!!!!

[j_tour]

Have you EVER seen a picture of the Easter Bunny without clothes???

Okay - apart from this one:



That is just... horrifying. Or maybe that's just the Temu version of this:



Surprisingly, both advertised as Easter Bunny suits.

Those are clothes....furry clothes....I know the difference.

[perfect_pitch]

They were advertised as 'costumes' on a legitimate website. Can't imagine who is buying them...

...and being an adult buying that stuff, you wouldn't want ANYONE to know you were wearing them.

[j_tour]

Can't imagine who is buying them...

Really?  You cannot imagine the market for deviant costumes?

And, one use I just thought of:  you know how kids love clowns at their birthday parties or whatever?

Well they love bunny rabbits just as much, and these costumes hide the face and groin of the entertainer, which is an advantage.  Could be a lucrative side-gig.

[perfect_pitch]

Really?  You cannot imagine the market for deviant costumes?

I didn't say I couldn't imagine the market... I just know that anyone who bought it would never, ever reveal to anyone that they had this in their closet. Imagine finding that in their cupboard.

And, one use I just thought of:  you know how kids love clowns at their birthday parties or whatever?

Do they? I haven't heard of anyone having a clown at their birthday party in almost decades.

Also, I'm pretty sure the job I have now piano teaching pays a HELL OF a lot more than dressing up as Poncy the clown. No thank you.

Why... have you entertained the thought of caking make up on your skin and tumbling around making a fool of yourself in public???

[j_tour]

Why... have you entertained the thought of caking make up on your skin and tumbling around making a fool of yourself in public???

That's why the costumes conceal the whole flesh.

And bunny rabbits don't tumble around.  They befriend young and old alike.  Sometimes at the same time.

[perfect_pitch]

That's why the costumes conceal the whole flesh.

And bunny rabbits don't tumble around.  They befriend young and old alike.  Sometimes at the same time

THIS...

...is either going to scare some little kid into therapy for the rest of their live, or give some senior a heart attack.

[j_tour]

...is either going to scare some little kid into therapy for the rest of their live, or give some senior a heart attack.

Yep. 

Or give some XU**C&&^ a raging &*SJJJC and no one would be the wiser.

All equally fine outcomes.

[perfect_pitch]

Yep. 

Or give some XU**C&&^ a raging &*SJJJC and no one would be the wiser.

All equally fine outcomes.

Okay - I have to admit, that was an epic response. It gave me a laugh.

[j_tour]

Okay - I have to admit, that was an epic response. It gave me a laugh.

Thank you!  A great deal of my life consists of thinking of ways to service you, sir.



Actually, for your further amusement, I negligently discharged one of my handguns yesterday, and there is now a 9mm bullet hole in a wall in my home office.

To my surprise, I was only deaf in one ear for about two minutes, despite being in my small home office with closed windows.  It was a 115 grain 9mm target load, so comparatively not very "powerful," and, as dumb and reckless as I am, I still never pointed the muzzle at anything or anyone important.

I think I could empty about a full magazine of that same ammo into the "Easter Bunny"'s groin and....they probably have protection against that.  Like jock straps or lady straps. 

After the whole wave of Barney attacks in the bad old days.

I should think so, anyway, but it is America.

No, I don't care where you're from!  It's America!   

[lostinidlewonder]

A great deal of my life consists of thinking of ways to service you, ....I negligently discharged

Please see doctor, who knows what you've contracted lol.

[perfect_pitch]

Actually, for your further amusement, I negligently discharged one of my handguns yesterday, and there is now a 9mm bullet hole in a wall in my home office.

Easy enough to fix. This may be handy then... I'm sure it will be easy enough to fill in.

[j_tour]

Easy enough to fix. This may be handy then... I'm sure it will be easy enough to fill in.

Yeah, but I'm not as good at hand work as you are.

[perfect_pitch]

Yeah, but I'm not as good at hand work as you are.

You mean... handiwork. Bit of a difference between the 2. I'm sure Sydney Swenny is great at hand work, because clearly the film industry is not hiring her for her... "acting" ability.

[j_tour]

You mean... handiwork. Bit of a difference between the 2. I'm sure Sydney Swenny is great at hand work, because clearly the film industry is not hiring her for her... "acting" ability.

Oh.  You mean jobs depending upon handiwork.  Or, for short, one could just as well say handjobs.

I'm not as adept in the English language as some of you right blokes down under.

You should adopt me as your son so I can have a better life down there.....it's difficult if not impossible for a foreigner to emigrate to AU. 

I can bring women with me too, as well, since I've heard they're scarce down there.

[perfect_pitch]

You should adopt me as your son so I can have a better life down there.....it's difficult if not impossible for a foreigner to emigrate to AU. 

So not going to happen - I know exactly what you're going to do to all our kangaroos.

[j_tour]

So not going to happen - I know exactly what you're going to do to all our kangaroos.

I'm going to breed them personally and create a master race of human-roo hybrid super soldiers, whose intelligence and strength will not be matched in the history of the planet.

[perfect_pitch]

I'm going to breed them personally and create a master race of human-roo hybrid super soldiers, whose intelligence and strength will not be matched in the history of the planet

Hence, why we don't let you into the country.

Also, it's kind of hard to breed them if you rip of their "coin purses".

[j_tour]

Also, it's kind of hard to breed them if you rip of their "coin purses".

I'm not breeding the males.  Those are for meat, to provide a modicum of challenge and danger, and as a source of touristic souvenirs.  They have antlers, right?  Pretty sure, anyway.

A few rare ones can be spared for the occasional boxing exhibition.

But I prefer the females for my own experiments.  What can I say?  I'm heteronormative!  When it comes to mounting beasts!

I'm beginning to think you don't know much about animal husbandry at all, much less cross-species selective breeding.

[perfect_pitch]

I'm beginning to think you don't know much about animal husbandry at all, much less cross-species selective breeding.

Yeah... sadly enough that's the one subject I flunked at in Primary school. Didn't think it was important... you know, when you considering English, Mathematics & Science.

[lostinidlewonder]

Yeah... sadly enough that's the one subject I flunked at in Primary school. Didn't think it was important... you know, when you considering English, Mathematics & Science.

"When you considering"? You English good speak. Lol

[frodo12]

"When you considering"? You English good speak. Lol

Boys! Boys! 

[perfect_pitch]

Boys! Boys! 

Everything is better in GIF form...

[j_tour]

Boys! Boys! 

See?  Even Gandalf there or whatever knows when you boys play too rough!

Respect, yo for my homey Samwise or whatever!  Called it and said it on the snap!

Yeah... sadly enough that's the one subject I flunked at in Primary school. Didn't think it was important... you know, when you considering English, Mathematics & Science.

They teach English down under?  I thought it was all bogan Strine.

Perhaps Paul Hogan misled me, with his witty jabs.

[frodo12]

You seem a little clumsy with your firearm?  Perhaps something a little smaller with less kick should be considered? 

[j_tour]

You seem a little clumsy with your firearm?  Perhaps something a little smaller with less kick should be considered? 

Well....I was only twelve when the video was taken....

It was a bit too large for me to take, even with both hands.

You are right about that.

[perfect_pitch]

Well....I was only twelve when the video was taken....

It was a bit too large for me to take, even with both hands.

You are right about that

Maybe the size of the weapons wasn't the weapon, but that it went off... prematurely.   

[j_tour]

Maybe the size of the weapons wasn't the weapon, but that it went off... prematurely.   

Hey, honey....at my age it's a good day if it goes off at all.

Trust me:  ask around!  The gals know.

[perfect_pitch]

Hey, honey....at my age it's a good day if it goes off at all.

Trust me:  ask around!  The gals know.

Well, while we're on the subject of sex...

Hale & Pace... always good for a laugh.

[eee-_-]

Chopin

[gasplamey]

When I opened the thread I litearayrlyl scrdeamed J_Tour why did you ahve to start the page with THAT.

Chopin

ThaNK you foir youjr att5ention to this matter.

[moonlight88]

Those are clothes....furry clothes

no most make their own fursuits basically from scratch. which is why i'll never have one kek

When I opened the thread I litearayrlyl scrdeamed J_Tour why did you ahve to start the page with THAT.

I'm still ignoring him... and the only way I inevitably have to see his rantings is when you quote him.

get thicker skin

[moonlight88]

Boys! Boys! 

why do you have so many alts
sh*t thought i hit edit

[j_tour]

Chopin

Liszt.

[perfect_pitch]

get thicker skin

I've skin is toughened enough... I like to think of it as not wasting time on the unimportant.

[j_tour]

I've skin is toughened enough... I like to think of it as not wasting time on the unimportant.

Sorabji had leathery skin, and was a powerful warrior who frequently fought battles wearing nothing but a loincloth made of animal hide, while carrying a stout spear of his own making.

He was a great man, and one of the finest Australians who ever lived.

[perfect_pitch]

GOD DAMNIT... You know the rules J_Tour...



If you're going to talk about that 'person', you need to use the proper formatting: "Sxrxbjx"

...or at least any 7 character word, beginning with S... like S*@)$*i.

[j_tour]

GOD DAMNIT... You know the rules J_Tour...

You thought I was talking about the children's entertainer who played the zither to some acclaim?  Who was later found dead in his house, which was filled with hundreds of plastic dolls painted in grotesque manners?

Certainly not. 

Only the greatest modern gladiator of this century and last:  really the only one deserving of the name.

Oh, there was a racehorse of the same name of some exceptional promise, but after breaking down as a two year old colt had to be euthanized at the track.

[perfect_pitch]

You thought I was talking about the children's entertainer who played the zither to some acclaim?  Who was later found dead in his house, which was filled with hundreds of plastic dolls painted in grotesque manners?

Was he the one doing the ol' wanky-choke and took it too far???

[j_tour]

Was he the one doing the ol' wanky-choke and took it too far???

No, you wanker, we're not talking about David Carradine, nor that other guy, nor that other guy.

Was he the one doing the ol' wanky-choke and took it too far???

And I'd like to add that I have no idea what you're talking about unless I am clothed as a centaur chasing a nymph.

[perfect_pitch]

And I'd like to add that I have no idea what you're talking about unless I am clothed as a centaur chasing a nymph.

Oh look - your favourite website has you covered...



Okay, well it's got you partially covered (close enough), but good luck getting someone else trying to pretend to be your arse all night.

[j_tour]

Oh look - your favourite website has you covered...

Someone should have paid attention in zoology.

That's either a hinny or a mule....can't tell which.

What a ghastly picture. 

Shame on you.

[perfect_pitch]

Someone should have paid attention in zoology.

That's either a hinny or a mule....can't tell which.

Well... technically it's got a human head and arms, it's just missing 2 legs. I did say it was close enough.

[j_tour]

I did say it was close enough.

Close enough for what exactly?

[perfect_pitch]

It was close enough to you wanting to be a centaur. I don't see any actual centaur costumes anywhere...

Keep up, J_Tour.

[j_tour]

Keep up, J_Tour.

What did you just call me?

[perfect_pitch]

Sorry j-tour - I forgot you hate majuscules... or should it be MAJUSCULES.

I mean, if you called me Perfect_Pitch... I wouldn't give 2 f@#$s. Call it a habit - nouns are meant to be capitalised.

[j_tour]

Call it a habit - nouns are meant to be capitalised.

Call WHAT a habit one more time! 

[perfect_pitch]

What?!?

[j_tour]

That's it.  I'm taking a pair of pliers and a blowtorch and getting medieval on your buttocks.

[perfect_pitch]

I must admit - I didn't know there was a 45 calibre Desert Eagle...

You learn something new every day.