Last post wins!!!!!

[perfect_pitch]

J_Tour... you may think you can win... but look at your post count...

...then look at mine...

...then look at yours again...

...and realise I am far more adept at winning at this thread than you ever will be.

[compline]

J_Tour... you may think you can win... but look at your post count...

...then look at mine...

...then look at yours again...

...and realise I am far more adept at winning at this thread than you ever will be.

Well P-Pitch , the very fact that you've been at it for more than 10yrs, proves you're never going to win, not with new blood coming along to join the race to nowhere! 

 

[Bob]

You all have lots of failed attempts.  I agree.   

[j_tour]

Well P-Pitch , the very fact that you've been at it for more than 10yrs, proves you're never going to win, not with new blood coming along to join the race to nowhere! 

 

j_tour don't eat beef steak.  he don't eat fish steak.  he is Neptune rising from the sea, tridentine, ready for battle.

his post count may be short, but it is thick and rigid, like the can of tuna. 

[perfect_pitch]

You all have lots of failed attempts.  I agree.   

Says the person who attempts multiple times to post silly videos, and fails miserably.

Sure... we're the ones who fail.   

[outin]

Post count? Mr. Does Not Know How To Embed Videos may have high counts, but if we only consider posts of quality, who's the winner again? 

[perfect_pitch]

...but if we only consider posts of quality, who's the winner again? 

That's a great question to ask. The answer is obviously...

ME!!!

I'm so glad we discussed this. Now that the matter is over and finalised, nothing to do but just admit defeat and whimper on with your miserable lives.

[j_tour]

[outin]

That's a great question to ask. The answer is obviously...

[size=108pt]ME!!![/size]

I'm so glad we discussed this. Now that the matter is over and finalised, nothing to do but just admit defeat and whimper on with your miserable lives.

Size does matter...and you failed! Which means you are no winner!

[j_tour]

BONESAW IS READY!!!!!!!!!!!!

[perfect_pitch]

Size does matter...and you failed! Which means you are no winner!

I may have buggered up the size, but I have since corrected it...

...and stolen this win, again.

[outin]

I may have buggered up the size, but I have since corrected it...

...and stolen this win, again.

Crime does not pay off, you were immediately caught and the win was returned to it's rightful owner, me.

[j_tour]

I may have buggered up the size, but I have since corrected it...

Crime does not pay off, you were immediately caught and the win was returned to it's rightful owner, me.

Buggery hasn't ever been a crime in Oz.  What do you think the national hobby is?

And it hasn't been a crime in the UK since sometime in the 1960s, I believe.

[perfect_pitch]

Buggery hasn't ever been a crime in Oz.  What do you think the national hobby is?

You do realise that the national hobby is Drinking. Get your facts right.

Also, some will claim that Australian Rules Football is the national hobby, but it's basically just a bunch of men who haven't mentally aged since they were 9, playing piggy in the middle, except the teams are evenly balanced and they love to tackle each other physically (otherwise known as groping).

I mean, Christ - they call it football but they use their bloody arms. It's NOT football.

[j_tour]

Also, some will claim that Australian Rules Football is the national hobby, but it's basically just a bunch of men who haven't mentally aged since they were 9, playing piggy in the middle, except the teams are evenly balanced and they love to tackle each other physically (otherwise known as groping).

In other words, "heavy petting."  I fail to see that that's anything but a difference in quantity but not in kind to buggery.

And we all know what happens after applying the date-rape drug known as ethanol:  next thing, you're waking up in an alleyway being cornholed by some vagrants.

I stand by my points!

[perfect_pitch]

And we all know what happens after applying the date-rape drug known as ethanol:  next thing, you're waking up in an alleyway being cornholed by some vagrants.

And I just thought you got your kidneys stolen. What a world we live in.

[j_tour]

And I just thought you got your kidneys stolen. What a world we live in.

Maybe for you, but men and women alike give me compliments daily on my package.  It's free and open /sors/.

[perfect_pitch]

Maybe for you, but men and women alike give me compliments daily on my package

So you're a delivery man, who cares.   

I'm sure it's like most Christmas presents - it's disappointing, not what anyone wanted and you probably have it tied up with a bow.

[j_tour]

 

So you're a delivery man, who cares.   

I'm sure it's like most Christmas presents - it's disappointing, not what anyone wanted and you probably have it tied up with a bow.

Nah, I don't strap it my leg. 

I let the sizzler hang out below my Richard Simmons short shorts.

Just the tip.  A little bit.  It feels real good.

I don't stuff my jock with zucchini wrapped in tinfoil, like that fat **** Santa Claus.

[perfect_pitch]

Christ - It's barely September. Why the f@#$ are we bringing up Christmas???

Next you'll want to barrage the forum with songs from the 50's sung by crooners who are dead and gone and whose music (that reeked of suicidality) from their incredibly slow tempos are also dead.

I think in musical terminology - there is a tempi slower than Grave. It's called...

Crosby-esque; usually between 10 & 15 beats per hour.

[j_tour]

No.  Nothing about the brief season which shall not be named.

Bad p_p.  No.  No.

The music at least in anglophone countries is the worst crap imaginable.

I could deal with it, if it were played during xm season.

What is wrong with people who seem to think that Advent season is an appropriate time for revelry and treacly BS?  People can't even wait until it's the damned season, man!  Ridiculous, preposterous, sacrilegious, untoward, offensive, craven, and undesirable.

It is bogus, man. 

Makes me want to strangle elves or something.  Climb the clock tower and unload a few clips.

The drunken department store Santa Clauses you sometimes see in local dive bars are pretty amusing, though.  They can be allowed!

But only if they're truly committed to being surly, crass drunkards. 

That's the true xm spirit. 

[perfect_pitch]

I think there should be a law making it illegal to play Christmas carols in shopping centres until the WEEK before Christmas. Literally December 18th and onwards till December 24th.

You play it one day earlier, or later that that window, you need to be sent to jail so you don't cause any more PTSD to those poor shopping store checkout clerks who probably hear the only 1 cheesy CD the store owns, ON LOOP from October through to half-way through FRICKIN' JANUARY!!!

[j_tour]

By the "week before XM" I'm going to assume you meant at sundown the night before XM day.

They can play that Bing Crosby crap through the liturgical season of XM I guess.  I'd rather they didn't, but I suppose they wouldn't be technically in violation of anything but execrable taste.

Wesley Willis should have made a XM album.  Or Rollins-era Black Flag or somebody.

As it stands, the Joe Pesci XM album is pretty close to tolerable.  Not really child-friendly, which is a bonus.

[perfect_pitch]

By the "week before XM" I'm going to assume you meant at sundown the night before XM day.

Meh, whatever. As long as they don't play it for 3 months straight, I couldn't give a sh*t.

Wesley Willis didn't make a Christmas album, because if he had - people would have banded together much like they did before WWII to burn all the albums and watch the evil being destroyed.

J_Tour... THANK You for introducing me to Joe Pesci's Christmas album. This is *** HILARIOUS!!!

[j_tour]

J_Tour... THANK You for introducing me to Joe Pesci's Christmas album. This is *** HILARIOUS!!!

Here's a NY-tristate area way of saying "you're welcome":

[perfect_pitch]

That doesn't sound like Joe Pesci.

YOU LIED TO ME - YOU COLD, HEARTLESS BASTARD!!!

[j_tour]

YOU COLD, HEARTLESS BASTARD!!!

That's right.  I'm Iceberg Slim, not no chili pimp.

And you just lost your spot at being my bottom ho!

[perfect_pitch]

I was NEVER your hoe.

This is my hoe.

[outin]

Why don't you boys just crawl back to your caves and let me take care of this thread...

If you dig deep enough you might actually meet somewhere in the middle

[perfect_pitch]

Why don't you boys just crawl back to your caves and let me take care of this thread...

Cause history has proven you don't have the tenacity, the want, the will or the ability to win this thread.

[j_tour]

Why don't you boys just crawl back to your caves and let me take care of this thread...

I didn't graduate out of the sixth grade to be lectured by no uppity school marm!

Around the town I use a rattlesnake whip
Take it easy baby don't you give me no lip

[perfect_pitch]

It seems J_Tour and I have a clear goal...

DESTROY OUTIN!!!



[Now the question is how to do it without raising suspicion from the authorities???]

[j_tour]

Down in Cajun land they got remedies of every description.  Snake tooth powder, put gris-gris on the doorstep.  Some goofer dust, some sleeper sand, got them eating out of the palm of your hand.

Definitely going to be some malice in that chalice.

[perfect_pitch]

I've learnt never to trust any music you post, so I'm going to continue singing John Cage's ASLSP in my head.

[j_tour]

You're getting soft. 

You might have to go bush.

[outin]

Oh, I would not even waste my voodoo powers on you two...you will destroy yourselfs while trying to destroy the indestructible 

The video made me hungry though...maybe tonight I'll trap a poor caribbean guy to make me some proper gumbo...

[perfect_pitch]

Oh, I would not even waste my voodoo powers on you two...you will destroy yourselfs while trying to destroy the indestructible 

Yourselfs??? I think your brain is already destroying itself.

[outin]

Yourselfs??? I think your brain is already destroying itself.

The traditional words just don't seem to be enough to describe you two

[j_tour]

The traditional words just don't seem to be enough to describe you two

I don't think so, sugar. 

As the good doctor said:

I will mash my special faix deaux-deaux on all you who buy my charts, the rites of Coco Robicheaux who, invisible to all but me, will act as a second guardian angel until you over-work him

[perfect_pitch]

The traditional words just don't seem to be enough to describe you two

Nope - you don't get to re-invent the English language. Ever since the Black Eyed Peas came up with Phunk, and the Oxford dictionary allowed Yolo into the dictionary; it marked the end of decency and civility in the English language.

...having said that though, that does not give you permission to bastardise it any further.

[j_tour]

Nope - you don't get to re-invent the English language. Ever since the Black Eyed Peas came up with Phunk, and the Oxford dictionary allowed Yolo into the dictionary; it marked the end of decency and civility in the English language.

...having said that though, that does not give you permission to bastardise it any further.

So what you're saying is that you hate creolization of the language, and that those who speak proper Strine are right good chaps?

I don't think you really think that, and if so, I find it risible.

But, yes, the Auslaunder did wrong by saying "yourselfs."  The proper usage is "yousselfs," as anyone knows.  And that beast will not win the thread, nor will you! 

And it's spelled "fonk"!

[perfect_pitch]

So what you're saying is that you hate creolization of the language, and that those who speak proper Strine are right good chaps?

Oh please, it isn't creolisation - it's just plain dirty, abolishment of the rules and etiquettes that we are meant to abide by; merely some buggers attempt to be different and unique.

[outin]

But quite obviously it makes you very cool!

[outin]

...having said that though, that does not give you permission to bastardise it any further.

You should know by now I need no permission from nobody;)



And if it hurts you, the better!

[Bob]

*Bob checks in and notes everyone is still losing.* 

[j_tour]

Winning the thread cannot travel on radio waves or via the 5G mobile network. It is won by spreading through respiratory droplets when an infected losing person coughs, sneezes or speaks – which is why it’s important to wear your face covering correctly over your mouth and nose, unless you are winning the thread.

[perfect_pitch]

And if it hurts you, the better!

You SON OF A pregnant dog!!!

[sssarg0n]

Not surprised you're still at this after less than a month, you have been for quite some time before this. just letting you know I've not forgotten, and I still intend to win.

[j_tour]

That's adorable.

But it enrages me!

You may not have any protein from the sea, you puny pianist!

[perfect_pitch]

just letting you know I've not forgotten, and I still intend to win.

It might enrage J_Tour, but that's only because he doesn't have the patience and the stamina to win. He's pissed off at anyone who challenges me.

Me??? I think of you in this thread like a fly, freely wafting through the air; while I'm in my car driving down the free way at 80km/hour - oh wait, what's that??? It's the little carefree fly smooshing against my wind shield.

I didn't even hear a sound. I'm not worried in the slightest.